I thought there was nothing harder than being a war reporter until I became a columnist: I have been reading the complete works of Kamala Harris for 48 hours, and, in all honesty, I would rather be sodomized by a tribe of Mursi in any African war than continue reading. But I’m just a lowly news-worker fulfilling my informative duties. In fact, on Tuesday, as soon as I heard that Kamala Harris would be the Democratic vice presidential candidate, the first thing I did was call Joe Biden to let him know.
It should come as no surprise that the person most excited about Kamala Sanders’ appointment is Bernie Harris.
After reviewing thousands of pages and statements from Kamala, my conclusion is that she is one of those women who could behead any opponent with a flying kick, and who stops at nothing and no one. The bad news is that nothing and no one also includes good manners, morals, and the Constitution. Her profile is, in essence, an aggressive one that mirrors the emotional state displayed by a left wing that knocks down statues and sets fire to businesses. You’ll see how funny it is when Biden finds out the things she’s said about him.
Kamala’s most important book is The Truths We Hold, 336 pages in which I have found everything Kamala holds but no trace of the truths. Well, with one exception: “Democracy just cannot flourish amid fear,” she writes, “liberty cannot bloom amid hate. Justice cannot take root amid rage.” And that is true. She knows this better than anyone else, she who boasts of instilling fear in her opponents, who despises individual freedom, and who rages at half the planet for being men or for not thinking like her. If you read her interviews, you will see that she has confessed that the way to get companies to do what she wants is to threaten them with large fines, and that the only effective course of action against parents who do not educate their children the way she thinks they should is to scare them with good old judicial harassment.
She is the kind of person who glares at you angrily in the elevator after greeting her with a cheerful “good morning,” and answers bitterly, “It might be a good morning for you, capitalist pig. Who is a good morning for? Oppressed women? Victims of the patriarchy? Children who have nothing to eat for breakfast today because of capitalism?” So it should come as no surprise that the person most excited about Kamala Sanders’ appointment is Bernie Harris.
However, what makes Kamala dangerous to America is not her bad character, but her resentment. Her political ideology is a kind of revenge for events in her own life that, even if some of them may be regrettable, are not our fault. Not even Obama dared to use such insistent and implausible personal episodes to explain his various political woes. It is the infantilization of public management: making personal experience and preferences a universal absolute. Perhaps that is why she lashes out at Christianity, because someone who has made hatred and authoritarianism her professional flag will never be able to understand the religion of love and freedom.
One of Kamala’s great literary obsessions is abortion. She’s fascinated by it. Beyond Saturn and some sinister characters from Roman mythology, it is difficult to find anyone who talks so enthusiastically about killing babies. As a prosecutor she has tried to make life impossible for several anti-abortion activists, who have often accused her of a conflict of interest due to her relationship with the monstrous multinational Planned Parenthood. I suspect there is something sad and Freudian about all this. Kamala, a daughter of divorced parents but who has always lived with her mother, has no children of her own but oversees the two that her husband had with his ex-wife, Kerstin Emhoff.
Planned Parenthood is so happy with Kamala’s news that the organization issued a statement congratulating her almost before her appointment was announced: “Planned Parenthood Action Fund is thrilled to congratulate Senator Kamala Harris on her nomination to be vice president on the Democratic presidential ticket. Throughout her career, she has been a steadfast champion for reproductive rights and health care. With this selection, Joe Biden has made it clear that he is deeply committed to not only protecting reproductive rights, but also advancing and expanding them.” Translation: someone is already counting the money to be made with the blood of others if Kamala becomes vice president of Catholic-Islamic Biden’s government.
But let’s not fool ourselves. Kamala won’t be Biden’s VP. Biden will be Kamala’s president, and only if she gets up in a good enough mood to give him permission. Kamala’s nomination has only two sponsors: Black Lives Matter and Planned Parenthood. And this raises the question: is it just a coincidence that prime-time viewing for the last two months has been filled with street riots, continuous Democrat knee gymnastics, and police harassment (I mean the harassment endured by the police)? Or was it all part of this woman’s presidential campaign?
According to the leftist press, Kamala Harris has two big things going for her: that she is a woman and that she is black. A truly extraordinary feat that has never been accomplished by anyone before. She certainly deserves an award, although perhaps the vice presidency of a government without a president is excessive. They also say that it will make things difficult for Trump. I don’t think so. Kamala Harris’ biggest weakness is the same as Nancy Pelosi’s. They have just as much sense of humor as a hedgehog during the mating season. Yesterday on Twitter, some leftists admitted that Kamala has a bad temper but demanded that the bad female character be normalized. But I have news for you. It’s not a good idea to normalize anyone’s bad temper. That’s how Lenin started. And also, here’s a secret: civilization often consists of keeping your mouth shut out of politeness, no matter how angry you are. I do it all the time, especially when I get a call from the tax office.
Anyway, I prefer to end on a lighter note, looking at the bright side. There always is one. And the fact that Joe Biden has chosen Kamala as his vice president isn’t so bad. At least she’s not underage.
Itxu Díaz is a Spanish journalist, political satirist and author. He has written nine books on topics as diverse as politics, music, and smart appliances. He is a contributor to the Daily Beast, the Daily Caller, National Review, the American Conservative, The American Spectator, and Diario Las Américas in the United States, and is a columnist for several Spanish magazines and newspapers. He was also an adviser to the Ministry for Education, Culture, and Sports in Spain. Follow him on Twitter at @itxudiaz or visit his website www.itxudiaz.com.
Translated by Joel Dalmau
Illustration by Iñigo Navarro Dávila