Long Pants Wouldn’t Hurt Either - The American Spectator | USA News and Politics
Long Pants Wouldn’t Hurt Either

It’s rare that one has a chance to strike a blow for civilization while on a late afternoon exercise walk. But I have just enjoyed such an opportunity.

At about minute 20 into my walk, and while I was listening to a book on CDs on my old Sony Walkman, a 40ish fellow wearing shorts, a T-shirt, and a baseball cap with the bill pointed backwards, carrying some circulars, said to me as I approached, “If you live around here I’d like to talk to you about being your city councilman.”

I don’t know this guy from Adam’s housecat, and my area of South Tampa is represented by a popular Democrat who is going to win the council seat easily. So it really doesn’t matter who this solicitor is. But what a strange costume for a guy fishing for votes other than at a high school or at a shopping mall game room. So as I passed him I said, “Now’s not a good time, as you can see. But here’s some free political advice. There are mostly adults behind the doors you’re knocking on here, so turn your damn baseball cap around frontwards.”

I managed to get this out without slowing. I didn’t want my heart rate to go down. The political novice looked for a moment like he couldn’t decide whether to get angry or to turn his cap around. But then I was back to my walk and my book. I don’t know if he turned the cap around. If I had had a few more seconds I would have added, “Long pants and a grownup shirt wouldn’t hurt either.”

Where have all the adults gone?

Larry Thornberry
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Larry Thornberry is a writer in Tampa.
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