Darren Garnick gets to the heart and soul of Brandeis University’s re-branding efforts and finds that heart and soul is…buttery.

The new Brandeis Web site brags about its historical ties to Einstein, composer Leonard Bernstein and FDR’s better half, Eleanor Roosevelt – and then proceeds to boast about its historic role in bringing a new margarine to the marketplace. For the sake of research, I tried Smart Balance and found it to be quite tasty. But not drastically different than the Olivio that usually dominates the butter tray in my fridge. No need to switch now.

My palate aside, why would Brandeis – which doesn’t let any stupid kids get within a 10 mile radius – even have to bother branding itself as “Smart From The Start?” Does Harvard or Yale keep reminding us how smart they are?

Garnick, a great, funny writer and documentarian with PBS credits to boot, searches for the answer to that last query here.