Fat, Bearded Gentlemen Do Not Give Birth to Babies - The American Spectator | USA News and Politics
Fat, Bearded Gentlemen Do Not Give Birth to Babies

Even before the first progressive person was born, nature was already diverse. There are colorful flowers, there are brownish autumn fruits, and there are weird leafy things that make great-tasting gin and tonics. There are cute animals (pork ribs with barbecue sauce) and ugly animals (the slug). There are stars and planets. And there are even rainy days and sunny days. There are tall, blond men and chubby, red-haired dwarfs. There are beautiful brown-skinned girls and pale ones too, almost transparent ones, actually. Finally, I bring the Left some bad news: it was God who invented diversity, right at the beginning of time; you are a little late to the party.

What nature does not do is to call mosquitoes camels, nor clouds stars, nor valleys peaks. What nature does not do is lie or seek refuge in a falsehood to be able to gloat about being very diverse; the truth does not need to gloat. If the universe could speak, it would laugh at all those who today are publishing editorials praising Apple for its gesture of diversity and tolerance just because a guy in a Mountain View office thought he could manipulate public opinion with nothing but an emoji showing a man with a big belly. I am told that he is supposed to be a pregnant man, but it seems like that might just be a nice euphemism to avoid calling him a fat guy who likes too much hot dogs and beer.

I have no doubt we will all end up using the pregnant guy to inform someone that we just went on a pizza binge.

For centuries, mankind has progressed through searching for truth and receded when he has sought lies. The history of technological advances is the history of the search for truth. Only an idiot believes that our greatest scientists could have discovered the secrets of physics and chemistry based on false assumptions so as not to contradict the ideological trends of their time. Some of them, in fact, scientists and philosophers alike, suffered persecution for their determination to defend the truth. We Christians could talk for hours about that. It is not true that we liked to be devoured by lions, but it is true that we liked those fierce beasts more than denying the greatest of truths, the Truth.

Our civilization is in regression. Many technological advances are promoting lies and muzzling the truth. The freedom of the press once gained has now vanished, under the yoke of the supreme good of political correctness. An honest intellectual like Jordan Peterson is outlawed, but any poisoner of souls who defends the Catechism of the New Left, no matter how mediocre he or she may be, has an open window in all the media. None of the great philosophers would feel comfortable in this age. I abhor the term post-truth, among other reasons because it seems to me a way to sweeten the lie. To consider abortion a right is to lie. To curb our language when talking about immigration, minorities, or feminism is lying. Trying to normalize male pregnancy is lying.

The pregnant man emoji joke is no joke. Every minute, Big Tech is spreading the Catechism of the New Left in a sibylline and silent manner. Google shines a spotlight on any progressive holiday, from Gay Pride to Samaín, but erases any Christian symbol. Twitter censors conservative comments. The apps that enter our homes by the millions are all rowing in the same direction; their suggestive power is far greater than the television’s ever was.

I have no doubt we will all end up using the pregnant guy to inform someone that we just went on a pizza binge. But this ideological garbage is there, right under our noses and those of our children 24/7. We see too many emojis that normalize lying and too few crucifixes that suggest truth.

We are at war. This time we do not need weapons, but training. We need to build up a moral and intellectual dam against all the New Catechism garbage because, no matter what, we are not going to give up using these services that have become so indispensable to us. And we need to say it every day if necessary: the pregnant man emoji is not an ode to diversity, but an off-key, stupid, and ridiculous fallacy.

But we will have to dig new trenches if we want to explain ourselves (Trump is already doing it). Because saying today that the only way for a pregnancy to happen is for daddy to put a little seed in mommy can get all your social media accounts closed for homophobia, mamaphobia, or idiophobia.

In the end, though, it’s still funny that the most modern, liberal, and advanced society in history has not seemed to figure out how sex works.

Itxu Díaz
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Itxu Díaz is a Spanish journalist, political satirist, and author. He has written 10 books on topics as diverse as politics, music, and smart appliances. He is a contributor to The Daily Beast, The Daily Caller, National Review, American Conservative, and Diario Las Américas in the United States, as well as a columnist at several Spanish magazines and newspapers. He was also an adviser to the Ministry for Education, Culture, and Sports in Spain.
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