This is no conservative quack up.
This was a bad week for some one name acts, like Chyna and Prince, who shuffled off the mortal coil and shuttled off, presumably heavenward. But one such act throve mightily, namely The Donald. The uni-nymous candidate was practically the unanimous choice of New Yorkers for President. Granted that New York Republican is still a bit of an oxymoron, that is still quite an affirmation.
According to Wikipedia, “Donald’s two personality traits are his short temper and his positive outlook on life… Donald’s aggressive nature has its advantages, however. While at times it is a hindrance, and even a handicap, it has also helped him in times of need. When faced with a threat of some kind… instead of running away, he fights… And more often than not, when he fights, he comes out on top… He almost never intends to hurt anyone… Donald is also a bit of a show-off. He likes to brag, especially about how skilled he is at something. He does in fact have many skills – he is something of a Jack of All Trades. However, his love of bragging often leads him to overestimate his abilities, so that when he sets out to make good on his boasts, he gets in over his head, usually to hilarious effect. Another of his personality traits is tenacity… once he has committed to accomplishing something he goes for it 100 percent, sometimes resorting to extreme measures to reach his goal.”
Oops, please disregard. That was not a description of Donald Trump. That was actually the Wikipedia entry on Donald Duck!
In any case, you must love The Donald. Either in the sense of “you must see this movie” (yay!) or in the sense of “you must renew your driver’s license” (oy!). Because the bottom line is he has locked up the Republican nomination, and you can bet your bottom billion dollars on that. As Howard Cosell would say: “It’s over, it’s all over…”
Please do not misunderstand. I love Ted Cruz. A photograph hangs in my living room of Ted and me at The American Spectator’s dinner, looking for all the world like brothers separated at birth. I met Donald on the same occasion and shook his hand, but no photographic record exists. Wouldn’t I prefer a President who posed for a picture with me? Of course! That consideration far outweighs any nuances of policy. Yet I can read the tea leaves as well as the next guy.
It is time for Ted Cruz to step out of the picture. To run a campaign after being mathematically eliminated from winning, for the express and singular purpose of thwarting the candidacy of another, belongs to a class of political acts that class acts shun. We are saddened to see him go, but we can only respect him in the mourning if he takes his dancing shoes and tiptoes out into the night. Even a Senator needs a governor on his motor.
Speaking of Governors, that Kasich guy is also refusing to go gently into that good night. He is like the gift that keeps on giving. Then again, ‘gift’ means poison in Yiddish. Or perhaps we should invoke Kasich’s fellow Midwesterner John Mellencamp: “Oh yeah life goes on, long after the thrill of livin’ is gone.” That about describes the current condition of the quixotic Kasich quest.
The time has come, my friends, to embrace The Donald, although I would avoid the Michelle Fields method. This is a man of accomplishment, who has the passion of a revolutionary and the instincts of a conservative. He is a man of the people, but he also knows how to swim in the deep water. The Republican Party made him walk the gangplank of sixteen opponents, and he has gone from the Sweet Sixteen to the Elite Eight to the Fantastic Four. Now he has emerged as Number One, and all on his own dime. It is time we acknowledged as much.
Donald has done something for us no presidential candidate has done before. He has given us a window this past decade into his management style. Millions of Americans have seen him assign projects and assess results, manage relationships and build successful operations. Let us be realists and let us give credit where cash was not due. “Donald, you’re hired!”
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