Five Quick Things: Beating (Joe) Deadhorse

He’s told what to do by an unseen cabal of handlers.

Yes, Joe Deadhorse is my nickname for Joe Biden, as those among our readers who have been checking in each weekend for the installments of the serializing, soon-to-be-bestselling novel King of the Jungle, well know.

He’s Joe Deadhorse because everything about him is akin to a dead horse.

He represents a politics in America that is ready for the glue factory. Biden isn’t even an active ingredient in his own administration. He’s told what to do by an unseen cabal of handlers who quite obviously owe far more allegiance to Barack Obama, the real boss, than they do to the demented old man and his batty AWFL wife in the White House. And, as terrible as that may sound, it’s actually better than giving Biden the reins of power.

No, really. As hard as it is to say that we’re better off with Susan Rice and Anita Dunn calling the shots on Obama’s behalf and putting Biden out there to take the blame for everything than letting Biden himself make these calls, it’s probably true.

But here’s the problem: everybody knows that none of this works.

Everybody knows. Team Biden, which is Team Obama, knows. They don’t want to admit it, of course, because to do so would be to put their political power — the all-important source of meaning in their lives — at risk.

I keep saying this, but that dynamic is where the danger truly lies this year.

1. Look Who’s Saying the Polls Don’t Matter

There was a Wall Street Journal poll that came out a few days ago that had Donald Trump beating Biden in six of the seven swing states, with the two tied in Wisconsin, at least in a head-to-head contest:

Republican Donald Trump leads President Joe Biden in six battleground states in the 2024 U.S. presidential election, according to a Wall Street Journal poll released on Wednesday that cited concerns about the economy and Biden’s performance.

Trump garnered a lead of between 2 and 8 percentage points among voters in Pennsylvania, Michigan, Arizona, Georgia, Nevada and North Carolina on a ballot that included third-party and independent candidates, the Journal said. The results were similar in a one-on-one matchup with Biden, it said.

In Wisconsin, a seventh state where the contest is expected to be close, Biden was ahead by 3 points on a multiple candidate ballot and tied in a head-to-head contest with Trump, the Journal said…

Trump was viewed as having the better physical and mental fitness for the job by 48% of respondents, compared to 28% for Biden, the poll showed.

Oh, but no, says DOCTOR Jill Biden:

To heck with the polls — Jill Biden says it’s “obvious” she will get a second term as first lady.

Mrs. Biden dismissed some discouraging poll numbers in an interview this week on “CBS Mornings” and said President Biden is surging and will win in November.

Co-host Tony Dokoupil noted a Wall Street Journal poll showing former President Donald Trump leading in all but one of seven key battleground states, which Mrs. Biden dismissed.

“No, he’s not losing in all the battleground states. He is coming up, and he’s even or doing better,” she stated.

Mrs. Biden then confidently stated the “obvious.”

“You know what? Once people start to focus in and they see their two choices, it’s obvious that Joe will win this election,” she said.

The Wall Street Journal poll referenced by Mr. Dokoupil had Mr. Trump leading in Pennsylvania, Michigan, Arizona, Georgia, Nevada and North Carolina by margins of 2-8 percentage points. Mr. Biden had only a 3-point lead in Wisconsin among the seven key states surveyed.

If those results held, Mr. Trump would have about 310 Electoral College votes, comfortably more than the 270 needed to win.

I’m not here to tell you that you should have any sort of slavish adherence to poll numbers. I won’t do that at all.

What I will say is that when you start denying that polls matter, or that “the polls” can’t be believed, it’s a good sign you’re losing.

And whether Jill Biden, America’s most famous AWFL, believes it or not, that’s what’s going on with Team Biden. Clearly they’re losing. Just ask Rasmussen, who now has Trump with an eight-point lead on Biden nationally.

(By the way, in case you’re confused, AWFL stands for Affluent White Female Leftist, though sometimes the word “liberal” is used instead as the “L.” And yes, Jill Biden is as good an avatar for those as there is, though I won’t fuss at you if you throw Liz Warren or Randi Weingarten in as the better example of the species.)

2. But Why Is This Happening to Poor Joe Deadhorse?

I’m glad you asked because now I can sit back and let John McLaughlin, who served as Trump’s pollster in 2020, explain it. This is from a Newsmax column that John and Jim McLaughlin co-authored a couple of weeks ago, but all of McLaughlin’s observations are still spot on:

Many Americans believe the country is becoming a virtual dictatorship with a solid majority saying President Joe Biden wants to put former President Donald Trump in jail to stop his electoral chances, a new McLaughlin poll finds.

We should note that Russian President Vladimir Putin just won reelection by 88%.

But he did so only after Putin first jailed his leading political opponent, Alexei Navalny, and many of his supporters. (Sadly, Navalny recently died while in prison.)

Now Biden’s playbook against Trump seems eerily similar.

At least a majority of American voters think so.

In our new national poll 56% of all voters think Biden really wants to stop Trump from winning by putting him in jail. The national poll of 1,000 likely voters with plus or minus 3.1% at the 95% confidence interval was completed between March 9 and March 14.

Only 30% say it’s not true that Biden is trying to jail Trump.

Here are some eye-popping findings from the McLaughlins in that survey:

• 67% say that politics has played a role in the indictments of Trump.
• 58% say that Biden has played a role in the indictments of Trump.
• 56% to 31% say there is a double standard and bias at Biden’s Department of Justice, FBI, and IRS, where they target Trump but Biden and his family get sweetheart deals.
• 52% to 38% say the indictments against Trump were done because he leads in the polls and they want him stopped.
• 58% to 34% say that Biden should stop targeting Trump and interfering in the election, letting voters decide the next president.

3. Hey, Think This Will Work To Fix Those Poll Problems?

There’s a survey out there that says most Americans have turned against Israel’s continued prosecution of the war against Hamas, though it’s a little bit of an outlier.

But maybe Team Biden doesn’t think so. They’re using that incident a few days ago in which seven aid workers were killed in what sounds like a mistaken air strike by the IDF as the justification for a demand for an immediate cessation of hostilities. That was Joe Deadhorse’s message to Benjamin Netanyahu in a phone call on Thursday:

President Biden spoke by telephone with Prime Minister Netanyahu. The two leaders discussed the situation in Gaza. President Biden emphasized that the strikes on humanitarian workers and the overall humanitarian situation are unacceptable. He made clear the need for Israel to announce and implement a series of specific, concrete, and measurable steps to address civilian harm, humanitarian suffering, and the safety of aid workers. He made clear that U.S. policy with respect to Gaza will be determined by our assessment of Israel’s immediate action on these steps. He underscored that an immediate ceasefire is essential to stabilize and improve the humanitarian situation and protect innocent civilians, and he urged the Prime Minister to empower his negotiators to conclude a deal without delay to bring the hostages home. The two leaders also discussed public Iranian threats against Israel and the Israeli people. President Biden made clear that the United States strongly supports Israel in the face of those threats.

So much for that pledge of eternal support for Israel after the horrors of Oct. 7, you guys.

Poor John Kirby, who seems like he’s very sad to have to explain away the various idiocies of the people he works for (unlike Karine Jean-Pierre, who is far more grateful for her DEI job assignment and is willing to shill for Team Biden with far less conscience), didn’t seem to have much fun in trying to make sense of this:

It’s hard to conjure up much sympathy for Kirby. If he had any pride or principle, he would have blown that pop stand some time ago.

And just to make it all the clearer why the American people keep expressing a classic meme attitude toward Team Biden, there is:

4. Hey, Let’s Insist on Ukraine Joining NATO!

Tony Blinken should have been impeached as secretary of state several times by now, starting with the revelations that he was one of the people behind ginning up those 50 intelligence community spooks who outright lied to the American people by declaring the Hunter Biden laptop reporting was a Russian disinformation plot. Blinken’s role in the Afghanistan pullout, which by the way has given us the wonderful everything-old-is-new-again phenomenon of ISIS-K training bases in Afghanistan, was another reason. There have been a few others.

And now there’s this:

U.S. Secretary of State Antony Blinken said on Thursday that Ukraine will eventually join NATO as support for the country remains “rock solid” among member states.

“Ukraine will become a member of NATO. Our purpose at the summit is to help build a bridge to that membership,” Blinken told reporters in Brussels.

Is he crazy? Is he stupid?

One poll question this column would be interested to see results from is very simple: “Should the U.S. be engaged in encouraging talks to reach a ceasefire or a lasting peace in the Ukraine war?” If that isn’t a 2-to-1 winner among the American people, it would be a bit of a surprise.

But here’s the thing: continuing to demand that Ukraine be made a member of NATO when that is the single worst irritant when it comes to Russia’s relations with the West is the best possible way to ensure that no peace talks will be had between the Russians and Ukrainians.

And we already know that this government has kiboshed any opportunities for peace talks over the last two-plus years.

So Israel, who was invaded, can’t be allowed to win when they can, and Ukraine, who was invaded, can’t be allowed to find peace when winning is no longer a real possibility. This is your foreign policy.

It’s just one of a smorgasbord of reasons why the American people are souring on Joe Deadhorse. The stench is a lot more powerful than the political corpse is, that’s for sure.

5. Bingle Update

I’ve had a smattering of messages from a few of you asking after Mr. Bingle, who is this fella…

I know, right? That’s the kind of face you can’t help but root for, isn’t it?

I’d had a column in this space a good while ago talking about Bingle’s health issues — specifically that he has a growth of some kind that has turned his epiglottis into, essentially, a giant rock in his throat.

At the time I wrote it, the vet was giving me the “enjoy what time you’ve got left” speech because the way he saw it, Bingle was a goner with that sort of malady. So I figured I should pay the little guy a tribute in these pages.

That was in January of last year. It’s now 15 months later — where did the time go? — and would you believe Bingle is as vibrant and robust as ever?

No, that thing on his epiglottis hasn’t gone away. It hasn’t gotten any bigger, either, which is good.

But none of the effects the vet was certain would happen — that he wouldn’t be able to eat, or that he’d aspirate, or that his breathing would be impaired — have happened.

Now, he coughs like one of those old guys playing chess in the park. And when this dog begins snoring, it literally sounds like a chainsaw. I’ve got to do podcast appearances all the time, including with The Spectacle, and Bingle gets shooed out of my office because he will nod off to sleep in the doggie bed in the corner and practically drown me out with the snoring. That’s a function of the rock in his throat.

But otherwise?

He had to go to the vet last week for his yearly shots, and the guy was beside himself. “How are you keeping this dog in such good shape?”

All I can say is I took him off kibble and now he eats the FreshPet dog food, plus I give him this supplement from a company called Petsmont. It’s essentially a mushroom powder that apparently does wonders to reduce lumps and tumors and so forth; it seems to work.

And anyway, Bingle has made me look like an overreacting, wolf-crying helicopter parent for having written that column all those months ago because, to answer your questions, he’s doing absolutely, miraculously great.

So far. We’ll keep enjoying each day as an unexpected blessing anyway, even if that snoring has cut down on my REM sleep.