Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, and Puppies - The American Spectator | USA News and Politics
Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, and Puppies
by

London

I am in jolly old London for a Spectator debate over America’s presidential candidates, Donald Trump and What’s Her Name. London is resplendent as ever, and my wife is patrolling my behavior lest I hazard our bank account by popping into Anderson & Sheppard to order another suit and seek psychiatric refreshment at this point in the election cycle.

I am, of course, arguing for the Republican candidate against the fascist and I predict a close election. Somehow she — the fascist — has everyone in the media scandalized and fretting over Donald’s flirtatious nature back when he was a TV celeb, and no one in the press corps is even interested in her or her husband Bill the Groper. Did Bill harass women, and did she employ private investigators to hound them? The Mainstream Media (MSM) will ignore that topic. Though this column published the investigators’ names several weeks ago and in a book, The Clinton Crack-Up: The Boy President’s Life After the White House, I wrote of their nefarious achievements. Did she co-mingle her foundation’s work with her State Department business, raking in millions of dollars for her family and exposing classified documents on her home server so that our intelligence community was vulnerable and American agents were endangered worldwide — and in at least one instance put to death? That is a minor complaint, say the MSM; she is one of us. Let us move on.

The urgent question for the MSM is whom Donald may have kissed back in his bachelor days when the sexual revolution was in high gear and it was cool for men and women to act like monkeys on monkey-island at the zoo. Well, the sexual revolution is now over. Even Bill Clinton has slowed down. I for one think he looks a wreck. I cannot even imagine him thrusting himself upon a woman today. For those who in the 1960s and 1970s told us sexual excess was a salubrious pursuit, I say look at Bill today. He is badly depleted, and I blame his libido.

So the MSM are throwing everything they have at Donald Trump. They have gone too far. Frankly, even I was shocked the other week when I read in the Washington Post that the Post was claiming that back in 2005 Donald was taped clandestinely telling someone by the name of Billy Bush that he thought his TV star status would ensure him “the ability to grab any woman by the puppy” — the prudish Post wrote it “p—y,” but we all know what the newspaper meant. Think about it. Why would Donald ever grab a woman’s puppy? For one thing, he is famously a germophobe. I was with him on his airplane just the other day, and he washes his hands at every opportunity. Also, such unrestrained behavior with a woman’s puppy would surely get him in even more trouble with the Anti-Cruelty Society than he is with the MSM. Even I share the Society’s concern about cruelty to animals.

I have no idea how the Post arranged the taping, but it almost surely is a fraud. This is but another absurd diversion by the MSM away from the real issues of this campaign and toward the gutter.

How times have changed. I well remember when the Los Angeles Times and The American Spectator published the Troopergate stories back in late 1993. All hell broke loose. The Arkansas state troopers who served as Bill’s bodyguards (and, incidentally, his procurers) were traduced. The MSM jumped to Bill’s defense: the bodyguards were liars, Bill’s privacy was violated, what about the sanctity of his marriage? Distinguished members of the press corps such as Michael Kinsley and Joe Klein called me dishonest — though at the time Joe was hard at work on a book about a little-veiled Arkansas governor’s goatish ways. He called it Primary Colors, and not wanting to reveal himself, published it under the name “Anonymous.” Of course the name Paula Corbin Jones emerged from the Troopergate stories. She sued Bill for sexual harassment, and during the case’s legal discovery phase Monica Lewinsky’s name came up. Eventually Bill was impeached.

But back then all this sexual innuendo talk was dismissed as “It’s only about sex. Everyone Does It.” Well, once again it is only about sex, and as you might gather from my mention of puppies I find it absurd. What Bill Clinton did in the 1980s and 1990s was while he was as an official of the state — eventually president. In fact, he was in state offices, state vehicles, and using state credit cards. He did it in the Oval Office. Whatever Donald did was on his own time, years ago, and child’s play when compared to the president and his enabler, the first lady.

How about finishing this race by talking about the issues: taxes, the economy, national defense, immigration, and Obamacare? Finally, how about Hillary’s server and her lies to the American people? Puppies? Forget about it.

R. Emmett Tyrrell, Jr.
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R. Emmett Tyrrell, Jr. is the founder and editor in chief ofThe American Spectator. He is the author of The Death of Liberalism, published by Thomas Nelson Inc. His previous books include the New York Times bestseller Boy Clinton: The Political Biography; The Impeachment of William Jefferson Clinton; The Liberal Crack-Up; The Conservative Crack-Up; Public Nuisances; The Future that Doesn’t Work: Social Democracy’s Failure in Britain; Madame Hillary: The Dark Road to the White House; The Clinton Crack-Up; and After the Hangover: The Conservatives’ Road to Recovery. He makes frequent appearances on national television and is a nationally syndicated columnist, whose articles have appeared in the Wall Street Journal, New York Times, Los Angeles Times, Baltimore Sun, Washington Times, National Review, Harper’s, Commentary, The (London) Spectator, Le Figaro (Paris), and elsewhere. He is also a contributing editor to the New York Sun.
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