Eminentoes
The Political Suicide of Mark Sanford
He is guilty of far more than adultery.
South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford’s press conference yesterday was remarkably devoid of self-denial, avoidance, spin, and all the other little deceptions in which politicians caught with their pants down like to indulge once the pants are pulled back up and the TV lights turned on.
There stood a man honestly presenting his own moral failures to a national television audience that he knew would include his closest friends and family, and struggling emotionally to deal with the shame and humiliation of it all. It was the humiliation that shone. Mark Sanford, the potential presidential candidate, fought back tears like a little boy caught sneaking candy and who can’t help sobbing not because he was caught, but because he knows he let his parents down.
I don’t doubt that Sanford really did cry in Argentina. The tears he shed were not John Edwards’ crocodile tears. They were not for the camera. They were the tears of a man caught midway between his duty to his wife and children and his longing for a new love, unable to decide which direction to turn.
Which brings us to the real issue. So Mark Sanford was genuinely contrite. So what? Contrition is neither an excuse nor an escape. He is guilty of the sin of adultery. That much is as plain as day. But he is guilty of far more than that. He is guilty of such a colossally poor judgment that even were Republicans the sort to forgive marital infidelity he still must be ruled out as a candidate for higher office.
Mark Sanford had everything going for him. He was a conservative’s conservative. On Republican core principles, he was as solid as any candidate since Reagan. And yet he was not the sort of conservative who easily alienates independents and moderates. He didn’t simply spout talking points. He understood the philosophy. He lived it. You could believe this guy meant what he said because he meant what he said.
When Sanford was in the U.S. House, he slept on a cot in his office to save money. He pledged to term-limit himself, and he kept that promise. He carried live pigs into the South Carolina State House to protest pork-barrel spending, and of course he famously refused federal stimulus money he thought South Carolina didn’t need.
He had the makings of a great populist conservative presidential candidate. He was seriously discussed as a possible vice presidential candidate last year, and since McCain’s defeat last fall, activists in New Hampshire would quickly bring up his name whenever the discussion turned to the best GOP choices for 2012.
With such tremendous prospects, all Sanford had to do to skate into the top tier of 2012 presidential hopefuls was avoid scandal. And what did he go and do? He courted it instead.
It wasn’t just that Mark Sanford had an affair. It wasn’t just that he started that affair during the presidential campaign of 2008, when he was flying around the country campaigning for a presidential candidate. It was that he went overnight from being thought of as a man with sound judgment, a man of reason, to a man who wasn’t even smart enough to realize that governors don’t fly incognito to Argentina and not get caught.
Beautiful women can impair men’s reasoning faculties. If that was the case here, Sanford’s mistress must be the most beautiful woman on earth because she turned his brain into grits.
Sanford didn’t just leave on the flimsiest of excuses, like a schoolboy slipping out to “the movies” with a blanket in the back of the car. He left on no excuse. Really, there are no cell phone towers in the Blue Ridge Mountains?
In addition to the poorly planned and excused excursion, there was the whole matter of his duty to the people of South Carolina. He fled without a thought of it. South Carolina law requires that the governor officially put his second-in-command in charge when the governor is going to be unable to perform his duties. Sanford just left. And turned off his cell phone. If anything had happened back home, the South Carolina government would have been paralyzed.
Republicans might count themselves lucky that Mark Sanford self-destructed in 2009. What a horror it would be were he to exercise this caliber of judgment after winning the presidential nomination.
Princes have given up kingdoms for love. Mark Sanford has given up a shot at the presidency for, well, something. Perhaps it was love. Perhaps it was a little less than that. Whatever it was — whoever it was — I hope she was worth the price Sanford has only begun to pay.
About the Author
Andrew Cline is editorial page editor of the New Hampshire Union Leader. His Twitter ID is @Drewhampshire.
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Robert Rosencrans| 6.25.09 @ 6:45AM
Politicians and sex scandals are more common then pigs on a farm. The impression is that the Republicans have few values they really treasure themselves. Until that impression is diminished, the Republicans remain their own worst enemies. To paraphrase Bill Clinton, "The age of big testosterone is over."
Emo| 6.25.09 @ 6:54AM
During his entire 4 hour drive to ATL, did he not think once that this was a stupid thing to do? His behavior is consistent with that of an addict
Kitty| 6.25.09 @ 7:13AM
Didn't he once think of those four young sons in Argentina? Did it ever occur to him that when they found out -- and they always do -- that he might lose their respect?
Appleby| 6.25.09 @ 7:13AM
Ho hum. Another man puts Nookie above all his values and throws away his life for a roll in the hay.
From the choirmaster of our church, who humiliated his wife and four children by having a fling with a chorister in a very public way and then being tossed to the kerb so hard he had to go to Texas to find another job, to the President of my Bible College who abandoned a wife and four children to run off to DC with a student, to every man in public office whose panties fall to the floor every time they see a big pair of boobies, it seems that no matter what kind of destruction it will cause to his family, his community and himself, no man can resist any opportunity to throw everything away for quick and illicit sex.
And you guys wonder why marriage is dwindling? Who wants to rear her children to love and depend on a father who tomorrow will be on teevee with Fifi La Tush in Argentina extolling the joy of sex with someone not their mother? Feh. Better to bring up your kids in a stable home without the bum.
Melvin| 6.25.09 @ 7:24AM
I suppose if one could figure out why some in the male species finds it necessary to go sniffing around someone else's yard, we would have a talk show that rivaled Oprah or at least Jerry Springer.
I know I know as sure as the Sun coming up everyday that there are many husbands out there that have stayed dutifully married to our wives until death do us part.
My wife told me something 26 six years ago that has stuck with me even to this day. "Dear, if we ever get to the point in our marriage that we find ourselves running into the arms of another, then we should end our marriage right then and there while we still have a measure of respect between us."
If Mark Sanford was ever open to advice it should be, "Mark, Mark, Mark, you stupid fool. When the fever took ahold of ya why didn't just go home, throw the kids outside in the yard, lock the front door and give the Mrs. that certain look that married couples have and partake in some afternoon delight." It sure has hell would have been more enjoyable than sitting in coach going to Argentina.
nototobamessiah| 6.25.09 @ 7:32AM
I am more concerned with the Republican party, not this cad and his confession in front of the entire country. What an embarrassment for the part of Reagan.
Crusader| 6.25.09 @ 7:52AM
WTF was he doing in Argentina those last 5 days? I doubt there was so much "crying" as maybe just getting him some last pieces of that Argentinian pie. Five days worth to be exact.
Regardless, not the type of man I would want as a leader.
As for this line,
"If anything had happened back home, the South Carolina government would have been paralyzed."
It would have been interesting to see if something did happen. In the old days when men were men the Lt Gov would've taken command and dealt with whatever happened later, standing by his decisions firmly as his duty to the people outweighed any political blowback he might get because the gov couldn't keep it in his pants. In today's effeminate, PC, CYA political environment then yeah, the Lt Gov prolly woulda just sat at his desk saying, "I was never officially put in charge" while SC burned.
S.L. Toddard| 6.25.09 @ 7:58AM
"I suppose if one could figure out why some in the male species finds it necessary to go sniffing around someone else's yard, we would have a talk show that rivaled Oprah or at least Jerry Springer."
Would you look to Oprah and Jerry Springer for political guidance is well? It would certainly be no more ridiculous than looking to the talk show hosts most of you people currently follow, like Rush and Ingraham.
Former Feminist| 6.25.09 @ 8:03AM
I subscribed to Ms. magazine way back in the '70s and actually bought a lot of the party line -- until I realized that their idea of getting ahead included killing babies. In subsequent years, I've wondered why so few feminists speak out against women who go after other women's husbands. What ever happened to "sisterhood"? Where is their condemnation of "the other woman"? If freedom and equality for women means that they need have no morals, then they have nothing worth fighting for.
Curly Smith| 6.25.09 @ 8:04AM
"Mark Sanford has given up a shot at the presidency for, well, something."
Yeah, well maybe Sanford didn't really want a shot at the presidency. Maybe he satisfied his "Peter Principle" while in Congress and as Governor he was way, way over his head. Maybe he couldn't figure out a way to turn the big promotion down. Maybe it's nothing more than the self-destructive behavior that you see every day. Maybe it's nothing more than his way of taking himself out of the running. Was it stupid? Certainly, but all self-destructive behavior is stupid. Was it rational? No, all self-destructive behavior is irrational. Does it reflect on anybody but Sanford? Not unless you're a Marxist who believes in classifying everybody by groups and that an individual's behavior can taken as the norm for the group. Pity Mark Sanford and then forget about him.
Eric Damon| 6.25.09 @ 8:25AM
Ooh, another political sex scandal! How, oh how, will the state of South Carolina or the GOP survive it? Because we know that this has NEVER happened to another politician in the history of the Republic. Right?
I don't feel sorry for Mark Sanford, because he brought this on himself; I feel sorry for his wife and his four boys, because they are the victims of his foolishness. Not me, not the people of South Carolina, and certainly not the GOP. At the end of the day, despite all of the sturm and drang from conservative columnists and glee from the left, Mark Sanford was the Governor of South Carolina...that's it. As much as some GOPers wanted him to run for president in 2012, he had announced no such plans. His indiscretions are not the much rumored end of the GOP, any more than the election of Obama was. At this point Mr. Sanford is just another member of the group of politicians of all stripes who have let their libido get in the way of doing their jobs...Gary Hart, John Kennedy, David Vitter, and Bill Clinton, to name a few. In the immortal words of Outkast, "Ain't shit changed, just a couple more names!"
Louis Jenkins| 6.25.09 @ 8:51AM
Gov. Mark Sanford should have looked straight into the camera, and forcefully stated, “I did not have sex with that woman!” Then he could have bit his lower lip, just the barest glint of a tooth, and let his eyes moisten a bit. Instead he laid his bare neck on the chopping block for the liberal media’s axe and the leftist politicians who circled about like vultures waiting to savor a tasty morsel. Yes, the man did wrong. Looking at the comparison between Hillary Clinton and Mark’s spouse, it could be understood why Ol’ Bubba Clinton went on bimbo hunting expeditions every time the clock struck the hour. It is agreed, Mark should have sent the kids off to daycare, or the water park, and stayed home with his prize wife who is a very attractive, supportive woman, and there is really no excuse for the choice he made.
Barney Frank can have a male prostitution business operating out of his ‘digs’ in DC. No problem! Everyone is to have privacy! Bill can nail a bimbo in his oval office. It has nothing to do with his presidency! On and On. But when a conservative is caught with his finger in the pie: OFF WITH HIS HEAD! The left will make the most of this situation.
In all honesty, Mark Sanford has let the conservative movement down. Conservatives have every right to be disappointed. He erred and submitted to his carnal lusts. A promising “conservative hope” has blighted himself.
Roy| 6.25.09 @ 9:10AM
Yes, he should have done that and hopefully now he will.
Melvin| 6.25.09 @ 9:13AM
Hmm, interesting analysis, Liberals watch Oprah, and Jerry Springer for political guidance, and Republicans listen Rush and Ingram for theirs. So not to leave Independents and Libertarians out of the mix I would surmise that they listen to Alex Jones.
"You People," do I detect a certain disdain or revulsion in that phrase S.L. Toddard? So much for National unity huh? No place for, "You People."
John McGuinness| 6.25.09 @ 9:22AM
My feelings of revulsion for his lack of character, and sadness at his loss to conservative politics, are well recounted above. But what also bears notice is how adroitly his enemies exploited this flaw. Someone started this Where’s Waldo exercise and there’s not a fingerprint to be found.
Louis Jenkins| 6.25.09 @ 9:26AM
Melvin: Do ya think Jerry Springer could get Sanford, Bubba, Spitzer, et al, on his show? About half way through the show they'd rip off their shirts, their women too, and a fist fight could errupt. Maybe the Argentina bomb or Hillary would do a pole dance. Now that's political commentary. Springer's ratings would soar!
Rocin| 6.25.09 @ 9:47AM
"The heart is deceitful above all things, And desperately wicked; Who can know it? Jeremiah 17:9
Bram| 6.25.09 @ 10:10AM
I did crazy stuff for women when I was a teenager / early 20's. Then I grew up. Seeing a middle-aged man act like an aroused 17-year-old is disgusting.
It just re-enforces my perception that all politicians in both parties - are ego-maniacal prima-donnas. They are just disgusting people. Term-limits are the only way to minimize their power.
Charles Martel| 6.25.09 @ 10:51AM
I no more give a rat's rear for his wife or his sons than he did when he boarded the plane for BA. What matters to me is that he betrayed *me*, a Reaganite who saw in him the best hope for 2012, and in so doing, he betrayed his country, which desperately needs sound conservative leadership to replace the catastrophe we are currently enduring. I don't care now how many levels of agony he must now endure, and all I want now is never to hear of him again.
All that is left now for Sanford is epilogue. For the rest of us, he no longer exists.
+++
Chris| 6.25.09 @ 11:13AM
Strange that the holier-than-thou can't seem to keep their pants on or be truthful while claiming that same-sex unions threaten the sanctity of marriage.
Grzmlyk| 6.25.09 @ 11:49AM
Hey SL Turd:
Descending into the realm of mindless taunts, now? Tsk, tsk. Whither the straw men you are so fond of erecting? Whither the irrelvant braying? Whither the summary dismissal of reality? Wither thy ersatz withering intellect?
Hey, at least Rush and Ingraham stand for something. You stand for nothing but your own hyper-inflated ego and gaseous vitriol. You couldn't take a real moral stand if your life depended on it.
When you were a kid, did you want to end up a mindless rock thrower, or did you just fall into it when you were denied tenure at Joe's Diner and Liberal Arts (and Crafts) University?
Tom Anderson| 6.25.09 @ 12:18PM
When will Americans figure out the best way to deal with male sexuality is do what the Europeans do: mistresses are accepted as the norm, or so I understand, and as long as the man doesn't make a public display that humiliates his wife, his nature is recognized and respected. Of course, we can continue to pretend men aren't male and that they are just a type of female with gonads.
Monogamy in humans is unnatural. Why not create a family structure that incorporates that fact for the sake of rearing children?
Old Cowboy| 6.25.09 @ 3:00PM
What is so deadly about Sanford's case is the harm it does to the Cause. Those who espouse conservative values are held, and rightly so, to a higher standard. When they have feet of clay the entire movement suffers. A double standard yes, but one we should welcome and uphold. Sanford should go for his betrayl of Conservatives.
S----Teele| 6.25.09 @ 3:01PM
Well, this pretty much clears the way for Mitt Romney. (Or Mitch Daniels, if he changes his mind.)
Or perhaps Romney / Daniels 2012?? Now there's a thought. But Sanford- ugh.
Charlie| 6.25.09 @ 3:02PM
Has anyone actually confirmed that Sanford's mistress is a woman?
Pingback| 6.25.09 @ 4:31PM
LONG SLOW DEATH: Sanford only BEGINS to pay the price of a little excursion in Argent links to this page. Here’s an excerpt:
Jane| 6.25.09 @ 4:52PM
I am a female, and a happily married woman.
I must be the only one that feels sorry for Mark Sanford. Because I have a psychology background, I understand that an affair is not the cause of a breakup, but rather a symptom of an emotional breakup. I believe something had already gone wrong with Mark and his wife, before this temptation.
Could it be that Mrs. Sanford, who has always been smart, successful, and Executive-like in her own right, may not have provided the emotional support that he needed? I have no idea, I am only raising the question. Sorry to sound so old fashioned, but I know women who are so stoic, so critical, so bristley that it is hard for their husbands to approach them, or confide moments of torture, or helplessness to them. The marriages exist purely for the commitment alone. There is only intolerance and lack of understanding. I am only bringing up another angle.
Say for instance something like this were the case: He having taken stand after stand politically, and being ripped and dogged by his own people; knowing his fight was for love of his state, and love of his country, and getting no slack from the media; having to contiually stand alone and alone and alone; possibly, because of living in the spotlight, having no one to confide his hurt and his wounds to, and (hypothetically) having a wife who could have been more militant than understanding...finds himself starving for love, and in great human need of someone to talk to. He fell.
In a cup-half-full, I see a man who did not give in to this other woman for 7 years of their 8 year knowledge of one another.
I believe him when he says this is the first person an affair ever happened with. I am just saying, I can still see him as a good man. I believe something was hurting in his marriage looooooooooonnnnnnnnnng before the affair happened. Does it excuse it, no. Do I feel sorry for him, yes.
Sorry for his family| 6.25.09 @ 4:58PM
Jane, we don't know that he had "no one to confide his wounds and hurts to." How about his pastor, or another relative, or a therapist? His wife, as far as I know, didn't end up in someone else's arms, even though the marriage was in trouble. Whatever sorrow I feel for him is FAR outweighed by my sorrow for his wife and his children.
Mary| 6.25.09 @ 5:32PM
I think Jane's post is spot on.
We really shouldn't even be talking about this, but when you're a supporter of his, and he has to hold a press conference to confess infidelity it's hard not to speculate about what went wrong.
In in one of his emails to his mistress he wrote this:
I remember Jenny, or someone close to me, once commenting that while my mom was pleasant and warm it was sad she had never accomplished anything of significance. I replied that they were wrong... "
I didn't include rest of sentence because it's schmaltzy. But this seems significant to me and might tie in to what Jane is getting at in her post.
If it turns out that he's a serial cheater or if there's additional malfeasance, then my view of him will change, but for now I'm with Jane in that I believe this probably is his first affair and I can still see him as a good man.
If the voters of SC want him to step down he should do that immediately. He owes them that. But if they're willing to allow him to finish out his term, then I don't think he should resign.
Nico| 6.25.09 @ 5:53PM
It depends on what the meaning of "it" is.
Stories like this remind us how few ever experience love as eros in the Greek sense. Translated into American it goes something like this: slack-jawed and wide-eyed with senses in such an elevated state, they not only know each other's thoughts but can actually distinguish each other's smell in a room full of people. Those who relegate "it" to animal instincts have only half-a-point and indicate they've surely never encountered "it."
It seems the two lovers were led to eros in small steps over a long period of time. That approach ends up building a foundation for eros so strong that when it's blown up the heart is literally pulverized. That's where the two lovers are today.
Mrs. Sanford. If the marriage survives, the reason will be simply this: Mark Sanford will come to understand the complex manner and depth of his wife's love and devotion and he will be deeply moved. But, one thing is for sure: while it can be a genuine very loving relationship it will never be like his experience with eros. It's quite likely we get only one of these encounters with eros in life--it can't be contrived--and based on the commentaries so far, it's even more likely that very, very, very few get one at all.
We'll take a man like Sanford for President any day of the week and twice on Sundays. He knows things very few people ever learn. And, the next time he disappears he really will be hiking on the Appalachian Trail--and we know exactly what he'll be thinking.
Old Cowboy| 6.25.09 @ 6:56PM
Sorry that you psyhcobabblists find excuses for everything as though it justifies knowing wrong action. Fact is there is no excuse. Sanford is actually a fortunate man. My wife is a good shot and she would have done more than just send me packing.
bob crossett| 6.25.09 @ 7:56PM
I like Sanford and feel sorry for him. Sex has caused a lot of trouble thru out history.
Jim| 6.25.09 @ 8:04PM
I don't gave a damn about his adultery, it don't effect anyone but his family. Obama's tax cheat cronies and Obama's firing of IGs effects every American but nothing is said about that.
Men have affairs because their women are bitchy nags don't put out or act as if it's huge favor if they do.
Caped Crusader| 6.25.09 @ 8:25PM
Why in hell didn''t he just tell everyone he was taking tango lessons? And mind your own business.
Pingback| 6.25.09 @ 8:47PM
Seeing Good in the Bad… | links to this page. Here’s an excerpt:
Fionnagh| 6.25.09 @ 10:25PM
Nico, spot on. Thank you.
Jane Again| 6.26.09 @ 12:30AM
People are so willing to cast the first stone, and very quickly. Do we consider ourselves? Does anyone remember the stand Mark Sanford has taken over and over and over?! I constantly thought in the past half year, how can he take this constant heat... This has got to be bad for him. How can he do it. The other govenors haven't got the guts to stand with him. How can he not get depressed. These were my thoughts of good toward him, being amazed at the man's character. He was literally standing alone up against the President of the United States. No one else had that much guts in their little finger. Can we not still take pride in that! The man was transparent and felt a need to get things right and make a confession; he wasn't evasive. If we prioritize our high-minded self-righteousness, then what do we get? Bauer? Do we make ourselves feel good that we tarred and feathered him? He is obviously a very hurting man. I don't see it hypocritical that he voted against Clinton's affair. Clinton had serial affairs, and didn't see anything wrong with it, or his use of the oval office. At the fabric level of Sanford, he knows it is wrong. He deeply believes it is wrong, always has. Did anyone see the YouTube Part 1 and Part 2? I want the man restored.
somnolence| 6.26.09 @ 1:16AM
I'm not so sure that Jocelyn Elders wasn't correct about her views on onanism being a remedy for all these indiscretions.
Jim McClarin | 6.26.09 @ 2:37AM
How about nominating someone who's a professional at dealing with this stuff: Ron Paul. Talk about immunity...
Peter Dukoski | 6.26.09 @ 8:47AM
National research data concluded 40%+ women and 60% men have affairs. What separates The Governor is his political position. Review the landscape of politicians: Eisenhower; JFK; Johnson; Carter had lust in his heart; Clinton; and others like Senators Kennedy, Dodd, Vitter and the list could go on an on. What Sanford did is wrong but as Obama said, "Let there be change." We'll we're getting it and now the purists are passing judgement. I wonder how many responding to this article are pure? How many of you have taken the time to protest the Tax Bill up for a vote today? How many oppose the Stimulus . Did you voice your concerns about these critical issues or do you just sit back and pass judgement on morality?
Ray| 6.26.09 @ 1:25PM
Peter Dukoski, morality is the basis for all of our laws. Without morality, and the restraint that morality puts upon our individual actions, the impetus for law doesn't exist. We can no more dismiss personal morality than we can dismiss the law itself.
When selecting and/or supporting a public official, especially one, like the Governor in question, who administers the law, we must judge them based on their commitment to their personal morality, for it is that commitment to their own personal morality that will define and determine their personal commitment to administer the law. When the Governor admitted he can not administer his own morality honestly and without transgression, he also admits that he can not administer the law honestly and without transgression.
By rejecting his own morality and his commitment to his own beliefs and his own promises (like his marriage vows), he has displayed his lack of commitment and he has now lost the very trust that all public officials need to perform their public duties. Once that individual trust is gone, the ability to administer he office, the position, entrusted to him is gone as well. How can he serve his duties when the public trust was destroyed by his very actions? That's not something we should forgive, let alone forget.
Michael| 6.26.09 @ 4:29PM
Ah, more of those "family values" candidates from the GOP who Bible thump for other people except in their own lives. I'm loving it. The only you'll have left by 2012 is that idiot Sarah Palin. I wonder if he'll get a standing ovation like Vitter and Ensign did.
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Patriot| 6.27.09 @ 1:47PM
I never liked Sanford anyway. His baggy eyes creeped me out.
Mitt Romney is a cardboard RINO candidate--we will get our a$$es handed to us if he's our candidate. He's got all of the charisma of a wet noodle and I like him less and less everyday.
SARAH PALIN FOR PRESIDENT2012!! At least she can keep her pants on.
drcool#1| 6.27.09 @ 4:01PM
this was not suicide, it was murder.... he was targeted by a liberal with money and connections,who hired a whore from another country to take him down. why argentina? who is the whore? the press will not pursue this line only focusing on a republican's sins. this is totally obvious! a clear warning to all republican politicians.
Richard Baker| 6.28.09 @ 3:42PM
Michael:
Your comment misses the point. Of course human beings sin. The difference is taking responsibility for your actions. I must have missed it, but did Senator Kennedy ever take any responsibilities for his actions on the bridge? Did Bill Clinton ever take any responsibility for his groping and rapine activities? Proof that sin IS a universal construct (like that word?). The Bible, Koran, Book of Mormon, and others are Ideals that man has always had trouble achieving. Just because we fail to achieve or follow them doesn't mean that they are without value. I've seen real anarchy during my time in the Army while being stationed around the world. Anarchy here in the US is a game for posturing. Go to Asia, the Middle East, or Africa and tell me it's a game. Without an Ideal to become a Better Human Being, we are reduced to insignificance.
rational thinker| 7.2.09 @ 5:41AM
To Jane: you claim to be a happily married woman, but when you speculate on whether Jenny Sanford caused this affair by being unavailable emotionally, you are adding pain to what must be an already unbearable situation for her and her children. And once again, you are condoning lack of moral fiber on the part of a man by blaming the victim, a woman. Why don't you ask why Mark Sanford didn't consider marriage counseling or why he didn't go to his pastor or accountability partner? Why he didn't tell Jenny if he really thought he was missing something from their marriage so they could work on it? Is her commitment to him not clear? Is she not mother of his children? Was that not worth fighting for, rather than bolting and running? He is supposed to be a leader, a person who takes charge, an eagle scout, not a rudderless human being. And should you find out, Jane, that your happy marriage is an illusion, that your husband has cheated on you, how would you feel about having people speculate on what YOU did wrong to cause that? Marriage takes two, two who are committed, two who are honest in their communications with each other, two who are not afraid to have the hard conversations, because life is about hard conversations and loving commitment in relationships. I feel sorry for Mark Sanford, who took the "first step" and continued to take them, blinded by Satan. But I feel sorrier for his wife and children. You have no evidence, Jane, of any failing on Jenny Sanford's part. In fact, you have a friend of hers saying what a wonderful, open and honest person she is, how one can say anything to her. For you to draw your conclusions based only on speculation is exceptional unkind and unthinking at best. Please place yourself in Jenny's shoes and see how you would feel on the receiving end of your own comments. We all need to pray for this family. Jenny Sanford is open to reconciliation, but she is not a fool. She knows how to draw the line. No one knows Mark better than she does, with the exception of God. She will know if he has genuinely repented. Let's pray that they will be models for what NOT to do in the first place, but how to fix it after it has been done. Let them model forgiveness if there is true repentence.
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musicmagic| 2.20.10 @ 6:56PM
WOW. Woman over 45 are not surprised.
Married men cheat. Not just politicians.
50% of marriages end because of infidelity.
Married men cheat more than married women.
Women are womens' worst enemies because they dont' respect the marriage and cheat with married men. Don't fool yourself to think....my man will never cheat. They will. You might find out...you might not. Sanford is not much different than most ego, self-maniacal, narcissts. He was a needed, attention hungry, political animal...like....hmmmmm...JFK, Bill Clinton, Eliott Spritzer, John Edwards....and the list goes on and on and on.
I do have faith that not all men cheat. Those with self-esteem and true morals who believe in loyalty and honesty. My advise, don't get married unless you're committed to live monogomously in the relationship with your spouse. Simple. Otherwise, lose your soul.
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