Trying to Decipher Another Strange Article by Bill Gates - The American Spectator | USA News and Politics
Trying to Decipher Another Strange Article by Bill Gates
Microsoft founder Bill Gates (Frederic Legrand - COMEO/Shutterstock)

Bill Gates has written about the pandemic again and it reads a bit like a pangolin explaining Chinese communism. I mean, he knows what he’s talking about. That’s why it’s all the more interesting to delve into his strange writing, which this time cropped up in the pages of the New York Times, i.e., he’s playing on home turf. I have had a word with my emergency psychiatrist (Jack Daniels), and he has recommended that I write this article commenting on at least six of Gates’ column’s most psychotropic statements.

He begins with a disturbing proposal.

“Imagine there’s a small fire in your kitchen.”

What’s the matter, Bill, has Windows toasted the motherboard again?

“We need to prepare to fight disease outbreaks just as we prepare to fight fires.”

Good Lord! Bill plans to hose us down with hydroalcoholic gel!

“The world hasn’t done as much to get ready for the next pandemic as I’d hoped.”

Haven’t we had enough lockdowns? Haven’t we made enough of a fool of ourselves with our little masks? Haven’t we pierced our arms enough? Haven’t we had our privacy violated and our freedoms limited enough? Do you want more, Bill? This guy dreams of a pandemic that’s like Windows: 200 versions and 400 security patches to always end up with the same thing: “not responding.”

“I’m optimistic about a network that the W.H.O. and its partners are building called the Global Health Emergency Corps.”

Oh, brilliant, Bill. We didn’t have enough with the UN and WHO in the hands of China, we want to create a GHEC to put the whole damn world in the hands of Xi Jinping. Some people don’t deserve the freedom their own country grants them.

“If a sewage sample comes back positive, a rapid response team would deploy to the affected area to find people who might be infected.”

Here Gates is proposing, I think, that we carry a marker in our blood and urine, allowing them to quickly identify those who have pissed down the same drain. Don’t laugh, the day is near when you won’t be free of government control even for your barest necessities. Otherwise, I don’t think it’s wrong to investigate sewage. That way, we could implement a rapid response plan wherever traces of Gates’ synthetic meat show up and isolate those people.

“But they are far from the only threat. What if the next pandemic-potential pathogen spreads through surface droplets? Or if it is sexually transmitted like H.I.V.?”

I’m not so sure Bill Gates is throwing out hypotheticals. When he talks about these things, one can never be sure whether he’s speculating or plotting.

I read the whole article without falling asleep, thanks to a lot of caffeine, but I will tell you that the rest of the text is more of the same. Gates’ speechwriter is not very original: WHO is the answer, blah blah blah. We’re fortunate that he didn’t tell us this time how immensely philanthropic he is.

All in all, I admit that the end, Gates’ last sentence, made me self-combust: “The question is whether we have the foresight to invest in that future now before it’s too late.”

Can someone explain to me why all of the progressives’ analyses end the same way? No matter what topic they address, whether it’s an analysis on AI or an account of how their phimosis operation went, they always find a way to end with “you must immediately do what I say before it’s too late.”

I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait for one of those woke-faced guys with a bunch of BLM donation receipts in his mouth to come out and say for once: Hey guys, the world is going to hell, yeah, there’s no chance we’ll get out of this in time, but I want to tell you something: it’s not our fault! Everything is going to blow up and the best thing we can do is put the drama aside. Let’s fill our glasses and have some damn fun!

Gates, I can put up with your horrible operating system, I can live with your undeserved reputation as an intellectual and benefactor of humanity, and I can even turn a blind eye to your plan to make the world’s hungriest people eat fake meat. I can take everything except how immensely monotonous and repetitive you are.

Translated by Joel Dalmau. 


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Itxu Díaz
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Itxu Díaz is a Spanish journalist, political satirist, and author. He has written 10 books on topics as diverse as politics, music, and smart appliances. He is a contributor to The Daily Beast, The Daily Caller, National Review, American Conservative, and Diario Las Américas in the United States, as well as a columnist at several Spanish magazines and newspapers. He was also an adviser to the Ministry for Education, Culture, and Sports in Spain.
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