The world is a complex and troubled place. We can’t fix it. To mature is to understand this. One of the big differences between liberals and conservatives is that the latter have already come to terms with the fact that you can’t change the world, for the same reason that you can’t eradicate the inclination to do wrong in men, and this frees up a lot of time for you go down to the bar and drink beer for hours on end without it weighing on your conscience.

CPAC, which takes place later this month, is an institution in global conservatism. The West is going through crucial times. Conservative ideas have been expelled from public debate, censored, and muzzled in much of the free world. The Right is being outlawed, without weapons or wars, with nothing other than the progressive ideological scourge and its cultural steamroller. Conservatives, from Madrid to New York, have been screwed for some time. We deserve to go on a big bender in Florida. Besides, people tell the truth when they are drunk. And, unlike the Left, we like to hear the truth.

How about a game? Take a globe. Spin it. Close your eyes and stop it with the tip of your finger. Now see which country you have hit, and — pay attention now — I can assure you that there or very close to there, the Left will be threatening to ruin everything, destroy the national identity, impoverish the people, put an end to freedom, raise taxes, murder opponents, deceive voters, destroy education, multiply multiculturalism, persecute Christians, break the annual record for abortions, attack natural law, cancel culture, dissolve the family, erase traces of history, and blow up tradition. Don’t you see? The world, the right wing, the left wing, and even the electric car fans, are fed up, they long for last century’s freedom, they are screaming “We need conservatives!” and they don’t know it.

We conservatives have common ideas: we like to preserve things that are good. We have no problem with the past. We don’t tear down statues. We know that there are many things that were right yesterday and are wrong today. It’s enough for us to compare a Frank Capra film with any progressive crap on Netflix. We want that which is right to live on. The family is right. Equal opportunity is right. Money and prosperity are right. The nation is right. The divisive, revolutionary, communist Left, though, is not right.

We don’t need to change the world. We know that we can learn everything from the past. The great conservatives in all times have known how to read and listen to their elders. Fortunately we have discussions and different currents within conservatism. That’s good too, because uniformity is a pain in the ass and we distrust monopolies, including ideological ones — another thing that differentiates us from the Left.

CPAC, once again this year, will be an inspiring space, more necessary than ever in this convoluted time. My informants tell me that, in addition, it will be full of beautiful women, and that reinforces my theory that most of the beautiful people are now right-wingers. Banning, dividing, censoring, and hating makes you lemon-faced. I always say that to my progressive friends.

All in all, CPAC’s target should be the “Great Reset.” The IMF, WHO, UN, EU, and Big Tech are all aligned. The project was mapped out for the long term, but the pandemic has accelerated things. They say they want to reset everything, but we know Bill Gates; we know that will cause the world to freeze and crash. There’s only one answer conservatives should give to these Satanic plans: “We’re not computers, you moron. And I’m not going to let you touch my on/off button.”

CPAC 2022 must set the direction for the Right in the West. And it must do so as Ronald Reagan, Roger Scruton, and William F. Buckley would have done: by holding on to what the Left calls “old-fashioned ideas.” We love our old ideas. This must be the conference that tucks in Poland, that puts the brakes on Putin, that brags about Trump, that attends to the Vox phenomenon in Spain, that defends freedom in Cuba and Venezuela, that denounces the São Paulo Forum and the Puebla Group, and that sticks its finger in Xi Jinping’s eye and asks him to take responsibility for having been on the verge of annihilating us with his nasty cold.

It is not time to rejoice only in the pride of being conservative. It is time to say to all those people, whatever their ideology, who are suffering from the collective madness that the Left is imposing on our societies: “We are going to rescue your freedom.”

CPAC must send a message of encouragement inside and outside the United States, because the war against conservatism is not national, but global, and it is not state-based, but infiltrates everywhere like a plague of cockroaches. It is time to act! But, please, you do it: I’ll be too drunk celebrating the success of the conference.