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Ben Stein's Diary

Breathless

By from the October 2009 issue

Above the fresh ruffles of the surf — a selection from Ben Stein’s monthly Diary.

TUESDAY
I am getting pretty worried. For about six months now, I have had maddening shortness of breath. It comes and goes. Sometimes I don’t have it for weeks, and then it comes back. Sometimes it responds to antibiotics and sometimes it doesn’t. It rarely keeps me from swimming; in fact, never. But it gets me winded walking up hills or stairs and we have a lot of stairs at our home in Beverly Hills.

It does not keep me from riding my bike here in Sandpoint, world’s most beautiful place. But it does keep me from talking while I am riding, except to myself.

I have had many doctors look at me about this. One said it was from heartburn. He advised literally months of tests and also that I sleep on an inclined mattress. Another said it might be heart disease, but he could not cite any clear reason for that hypothesis. My regular doctor, whom I love, love, love, Bill Skinner, MD, no relation to anyone else I know named Skinner, says it’s re-current pneumonia, but like every other doctor, is puzzled by how anyone could have so much pneumonia and live.

Could it be pulmonary edema? But then why do I wake up some mornings with no breathing problem at all? Besides, shouldn’t I be dead by now if it’s pulmonary edema?

I have a theory. When I was a child, I had really terrible asthma. Really, really bad. Life threateningly bad. Maybe it’s returned in a somewhat more attenuated form…I notice I have it much less in Beverly Hills than in Malibu and a lot more in Sandpoint, which has a ton of dust in the air from the cursed highway bypass, than in Bottle Bay, maybe 10 miles or less across the lake.

Oh, and then there’s another thing. I have on occasion taken Singulair, a pill that helps breathing in asthma victims, and it works fantastically well. Would it work that well if I had pulmonary edema?

Please, if you are a neo-Darwinist who wants me to die, don’t bother writing in. Or if you advocate traditional Chinese medicines, also don’t bother writing in. Ooops. No, maybe I am wrong there because Tazo Refresh Tea, the mint variety, from Starbucks, works fantastically well also to help with my condition. (“I just dropped in to see what condition my condition was in,” as the song goes.)

Well, shortness of breath and all, I had a great day anyway.

I got up at about 5 a.m., prayed my usual prayers, took some photos of the sunrise, went back to sleep until about 10:30, shaved, got dressed, and made breakfast for my houseguest, Dr. Phil DeMuth. As far as I can tell, he rarely gets to eat a breakfast as hearty as what I make, and he eats it happily.

The menu: Fresh orange juice (fresh from Tropicana), English muffins with butter and marmalade, and Oscar Mayer bacon, five or six slices each.

Now, you might think all bacon is the same. NOT TRUE. For some reason, Oscar Mayer is by far the best. Likewise, no other English muffin is even close to as tasty as Thomas’s. Not even close.

And then we have tea, Tazo Refresh, of course. Tazo Refresh is just one of the many incredibly great suggestions from my sister. It is a miracle tea.

(None of these people has paid me a penny.)

Then, onto the bikes for a quick ride around the beach to see how many beautiful women are there in bikinis. I know this shows I am a sexist, lookist, “beauty discrimination” pig. I don’t care. I’m not running for anything.

Then usually up to the local bookstore, Vanderford’s, to buy the Wall Street Journal. The news of the stock market has been breathtakingly good this summer. Yeah. After the horror of the Crash, it’s a relief. That’s putting it mildly. I am waaay too addicted to the stock market. Wow, I have a lot of flaws.

Page: 1 2 3  

topics:
Hart Crane

About the Author

Ben Stein is a writer, actor, economist, and lawyer living in Beverly Hills and Malibu. He writes “Ben Stein’s Diary” for every issue of The American Spectator.

Letter to the Editor View all comments (93) |

Appleby| 10.22.09 @ 7:06AM

My beloved Daddy died a year ago October 7, and one of the things that he suffered was shortness of breath that ultimately required oxygen full time. He had a build-up of fluid around his heart and had special medication (Lasic, I think) to deal with it. This may come and go. Ask your doctor. God bless you.

Armand Croft| 10.22.09 @ 8:05AM

Mr. Stein--What is the sensation of your shortness of breath? If it's feeling that you can't fill your lungs, or that they're only half-filling, or if you need to take ever deeper breaths, it might be psychogenic dyspnea, stress-induced shortness of breath. If so, a sure-fire cure is the relaxation response, the non-ritualistic cousin of transcendental meditation. Websites abound.
Be well.

melvin| 10.22.09 @ 8:43AM

Then again Ben, it just might be a case of, Gas. A bit of Benifiber, (they didn't pay me for this) and you'll right as rain.
Life has gotten so hectic and mechanical now, we must never ever forget and force ourselves as need be to stop and appreciate those and life around us.
My bit of paradise is the swimming pool at Camp Johnson in Jacksonville, NC, where I go swimming, not so much for the physical exercise, but for my little group of friends who are 50 to 60 something and we tread water and solve all the worlds problems in a span of hour.
I never knew any of these wonderful people until last year, and I wouldn't trade their friendship for all the gold in the world.
I guess this happens when one gets older, we tend to look for each other when one of us doesn't show up to see if we are all right.
It is a reassuring thought to know, that just maybe there is hope for humanity after all.

Darla | 10.22.09 @ 8:58AM

My sister-in-law had something called "Red Sea" which caused problems breathing. It was caused by a red algae that grows in the ocean and puts out spores that can get into the lungs and cause lots of problems. She had been riding a bicycle along a beach just before she came down with symptoms. We were on a vacation at the time. Unfortunately, the doctors in the Midwest had never dealt with this condition so it took some time for her to be diagnosed and treated properly. Ask your doc about "Red Sea". And, God be with you Ben Stein. I love your writings and your humor.

Darla| 10.22.09 @ 10:47AM

I told you wrong. It is called "Red Tide", not "Red Sea".

S.L. Toddard| 10.22.09 @ 9:31AM

Mr. Stein, ask your doctor for an albuterol inhaler. If it alleviates your next attack (or whatever you choose to call it), it's either asthma or at least something that the inhaler alleviates.

Grock| 10.22.09 @ 9:45AM

As a former mouth breather, {Asthma} I have tried to breathe through my nose in my own quiet sessions, if dust is in the air this seems to help.

Eric Cartman | 10.22.09 @ 10:10AM

Hi Ben. Just a thought here. But could it be from the Obama Administration? He's been in office 8-months, you have had this for 6-months and for the first 2-months he was doing nothing much. But as time has gone by, he has really been screwing things up in the economic realm. It maybe tension! In your subconscious, you may be always thinking about the trillions we are never going to be able to repay and how most of D.C. just doesn't care. I know I'm worried as hell. Keeps me awake at night. Like I said, just a thought - God bless.

Ned| 10.22.09 @ 11:03AM

Ben, more bacon, cheeseburgers, milk shakes, women in bikinis, lots of full speed ahead, and you will be fine.

Eric Cartman | 10.22.09 @ 11:36AM

Cheeseburger, shmeezeburger! Ben, forget Ned's wimpy cheeseburger. Get your hands around KFC's Double Down Chicken Sandwich! Two deep fried chicken breasts used as the bun for another deep fried chicken breast and topped with bacon and cheese! Cheese, Ben, Cheeeseeee! You'll be so happy, they'll have to scrape you off the ceiling with a greasy spatula!

lehrue stevens jr. m.d.| 10.22.09 @ 11:31AM

Tried to find Seasons Resort, Edgewater and Libery rest. No luck-are they fictitious to protect you from the adoring hordes?

Dr Gregory Young| 10.22.09 @ 11:41AM

Dear Ben,

I am a retired (from practice) neuroscientist. May I offer an over-the-counter suggestion? I believe I am familar with what you are experiencing. I would recommend to you the following:

L-Cysteine
N-Acetyl-Cysteine (NAC)
Glutathione (tripeptide)

These 2 amino acids and 1 tripeptide (in capsule form) will effectivley and harmlessly aid the immune system from overresponding to debris within the air that you are now subject to inhaling, subject to growing older and the inevitable decline in the abilities of our Immune Response. As dietary supplements, these amino acids work directly within the tissues of the lungs, strengthening the Immune Response while fostering deeper, unencumbered breathing throughout the day and night for those prone with your symptoms. I recommend you obtain these from JoMarLabs.com, with whom I have dealt with personally 30 years. Good luck and Better Health!

Dr. Gregory Young

heidi| 10.22.09 @ 12:54PM

Bet the doc is right. Building up the immune system should always be the first line of defense since the body was designed to heal itself.

Ben, I think you are adorable and hope you enjoy every minute of every day! I am sure you will because you have the gift of gratitude for all that you have been given.

May God Bless.

Joe| 10.22.09 @ 12:54PM

Here is a side question. Have you notice the rise in Oil prices again with no reason. Our supplies are increasing not decrease. Maybe it is time for another article to WSJ.

John Hudock | 10.22.09 @ 12:54PM

Ben,

Please follow-up if you find any of the suggestions to have been helpful. I've had a very similar condition that comes and goes, but I have never had asthma, but I have had a few occasions of a cold turning to serious bronchitis and then to pneumonia, so I, too, have wondered if it could be caused by some leftover bacteria. I have also noticed that I don't get it when I am at home for extended periods (N. Westchester, mostly wooded suburbs) but that it comes when I travel into work in the city, so I have considered it might be caused by some allergen. I may try Dr. Young's suggestion to see if it does any good, but please let us know if you find anything that helps.

Ed| 10.22.09 @ 2:19PM

Hi Ben -- What you want to get is a portable spirometer so you can test your vital capacity when you get your bouts of shortness of breath. Vital capacity is the total volume of air (in liters) that you can breath out in one continuous expiration. If you are indeed having asthma attacks, the drop in vital capacity will be measurable. I have a Ph.D. in Physiology (not an M.D. degree). Check with your doctors for what would be appropriate (electronic ones run in the thousands of dollars and mechanical ones run in the hundreds of dollars). Good luck and God Bless.

TennesseeVolunteer| 10.22.09 @ 3:45PM

Ben, thanks for a little break from the stress and worry that so many people are having to deal with now. A simple life with simple pleasures is to be cherished. My favorite place is to sit on my deck overlooking Lake Sequoia in Cherokee Village, AR. There are bigger and more ostentatious places but for my wife and I, it is our Fortress of Solitude. Be well my friend.

larry v| 10.22.09 @ 5:13PM

ben,i recently got a pneumococcal vaccination which protects from pneumonia for 10 years.if you get one and the problem persists,it would seem you could eliminate that diagnosis.hoping this will be of some help.also hope all of our prayers for a national treasure will be helpful as well.

Sam G| 10.22.09 @ 5:30PM

from a cardiologist - episodic shortness of breath, especially if exercise-induced, can be a symptom of coronary disease. An anginal equivalent, if you will.

If I were seeing you, I would consider an exercise stress test with imaging - either echocardiography or a nuclear scan.

Of course, this is based on very limited information. And to a man with a hammer, everything looks like a nail

Robert | 10.22.09 @ 5:32PM

Shortness of breathe really could be anything, from asthma to something very serious. Talk to your doctor.

http://www.clean-pool-and-spa......istry.html

Tina Hummel| 10.22.09 @ 6:39PM

Ben - thanks for sharing a lovely day - it made mine.

E.A Schill| 10.22.09 @ 10:45PM

eh, your fine. Life is Beautiful

Martin Owens| 10.22.09 @ 11:43PM

For shortness of breath, beware of congestive heart problems. When I was diagnosed, I was shocked- I too thought it was childhood asthma redux. But I started taking serious water pills, like Lasix, and exercising like a fiend. I got my life back. Didn't realize how close to the glue factory I had drifted... Ask your medicine man about that retained water angle.....

Hugh| 10.23.09 @ 4:01PM

Ben,

Bacon, butter, cheeseburgers, milkshakes, senior citizen. You are a prime candidate for cardio-vascular blockage. Shortness of breath was one of my symptoms; chest pressure, the other. I really recommend the stress test that Sam G. proposed.

DukeD| 10.23.09 @ 6:19PM

Yo Ben. Join the club. I had this occasional shortness of breath that kind of came and went away. Finally went to the Doctor and the thing is.... they really can't tell a lot until they shoot you with the dye. Went to hospital for a stent (you know... little tube in your artery to open it up) and ...oops.... lets make that a bypass. In my sixth week of recovery.... but not short of breath anymore. Check it out... listen to the cardiologist with the hammer!

GAM| 10.24.09 @ 5:55PM

Hope you find a cure. I loved, loved, loved you in Fredericksburg this week.

Mike ZB| 10.24.09 @ 11:30PM

Advice from my experience:
1. Stay regular - histamines in your gut add to the allergy load just as histamines in your lungs.
2. Handle carbs with care.
I endured bronchial asthma symptoms as a child, during a time when canning fruit with sugar was popular. Decades later, I read a book (published in the year of my birth) that noted the relationship between hypoglycemia and asthma - one sensitivity feeds another. This was why the military didn't want me ...
3. Keep your stamina built up. A long bike cruise will do more for that than a short vigorous workout.
Hope this helps.

Linda F | 10.25.09 @ 8:07AM

I also had breathing problems in my youth - chronic bronchitis, multiple colds. I probably had undiagnosed asthma; when in my early 40s, a physician diagnosed asthma, and put me on meds. I struggled to achieve a stable medical condition, but was hospitalized about once every 2 years.

I've found that even as little as 10 pounds lost makes a huge difference in breathing. Other things that help: building up the immune system (other commenters are spot-on with that), avoiding allergens (particularly aspirin, salicylates, red wine and aged cheeses, and, most importantly, MSG), and taking long-term meds religiously.

allie a | 10.25.09 @ 9:47PM

Ben, you are such a mensch...a deep mensch, and I've loved you for it for years. Good writer, too!
God bless you, your wife, your son, your friends, your country, and your readers like me too.
We are all held in Love.....

Jim Coleman| 10.30.09 @ 8:07PM

Hey Ben...I'm a retired neurologist and I have no idea what's bugging you and I have exactly the same thing bugging me...go figure. I think you and I are a lot alike in another way...we like to eat and likely that's where some of this comes from. As to bacon....the very best is from Benton's in Madisonville, TN (Google Benton's Hams) and tell Allan Benton I sent you...you'll never eat any other bacon.....ever....and it might cure what ever is ailing you....or maybe not.

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writing an interesting and very useful,
informative

Shanghaiescort | 10.28.10 @ 9:27PM

That's a breath taking story or very useful to read.

Attractions | 11.9.10 @ 1:16PM

Hope you find a cure. I loved, loved, loved you in Fredericksburg this week.

EdgeMan| 11.19.10 @ 8:36AM

Cool blog with interesting material. I'll be back.
cgrs

Car | 11.21.10 @ 11:22PM

I have had maddening shortness of breath, too. How can i do?

sert | 11.26.10 @ 1:33AM

Thanks for sharing..

hostgator cyber monday | 11.28.10 @ 1:25PM

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