Leon Panetta was the flavor of last week, not only because he allowed Joe Biden to come across as profound, when, at his usual haunts at Harvard, Joe observed, “At least give the guy a chance to get out of office.” So our veep calls his boss “the guy.” Talk about “inappropriate,” which is how he characterized Leon’s dismissive remarks about our still-serving president.

Leon responded in kind. “I don’t think you put history on hold,” he noted. But it also sounds to us he’s put it in reverse. Overlooked has been his comment that the president’s ineptness and lack of fire stem from self-doubts about his legitimacy, which, as the New York Times described Leon’s thinking, “has been challenged more than any of his predecessors by accusations like the unsubstantiated claim that he was not born in the United States.” So now we have anti-Obama Democrats hiding behind the so-called birthers. Out of long-suppressed guilt for not having vetted their “guy” in the first place?

Sorry, Leon, but we’re not buying your mealy-mouthedness here any more than we are your having it both ways on Benghazi. First you slam your commander in chief for pretending the murderous attacks of 9/11-12/12 weren’t terrorism but then you insist that as for your role as SecDef geography made it impossible to send U.S. military help to the besieged mission. Anyway, you add, you just want to get back to your walnut farming.

If that weren’t nutty enough, now we have a former peanut farmer of a president piling on against our still-serving president. Clearly the latter is losing the retired white male vote. Leon is 76, Peanut Farmer Carter a fresh 90.

Anyone out there not dissing our still-server? (And we don’t just mean Democratic candidates who suddenly can’t remember ever registering to vote in 2008 and 2012.) As the list lengthens, we sometimes overlook more ominous acts of piling on. Remember last September 3? Our rock star leader was in Tallinn, Estonia, to address the Estonian people. “Hello, Estonia!” the rocker began, as he went on to praise all three Baltic nations’ democracy and membership in NATO while condemning Russian aggression in Ukraine and reminding the unnamed Mr. Putin that nations like Estonia are not “post-Soviet territory.” Two days later came Mr. Putin’s reply, as Russian boots on the ground crossed into Estonia to kidnap an intelligence officer who is now awaiting trial on espionage charges at Moscow’s notorious Lefertovo prison. About this, not a peep from our chief executive, not even in between practice swings at the driving range.

Okay, we can see all concerned are badly embarrassed by this situation with our hapless Mr. Obama. What is do be done? Some call the situation toxic, even though by all accounts the EPA remains in Mr. Obama’s camp and no one in the White House has yet alleged a connection between this toxicity and the Atlantic Coast’s disappearing shoreline. In one curious development, the WhiteHouse.gov website isn’t being refreshed at its usual pace. About the most interesting thing our leader did these last few days is designate the San Gabriel Mountains a National Monument. Maybe they’ll be invited to the White House to meet the president in the Rose Garden.

But fabulous gestures won’t raise the president’s numbers. He needs new outlets, new exposure, a newer crowd with which to mix. MSNBC’s numbers are said to be falling, especially Rachel Maddow’s. Wouldn’t it be win-win for both of them if Mr. Obama were to appear on her show, maybe even as co-host? Saturday Night Live’s numbers have also plummeted, and maybe the show already has too many regulars, not to mention that as it’s become more diverse it’s also thrown out a lot of its PC content. Would Mr. O be comfortable in such surroundings?

Which leaves only the newly hot Bill Maher show, where progressives of all stripes are mixing it up in unsurprising ways. To be sure, there are some unpleasant guests such as the bleeding Islamophiliac Mr. Ben Affleck, but Maher needs to find suitable backup for such EOW-quality guests. So why not, Mr. Prez? You game? Join the Maheragi and free yourself from yourself. Just remember, despite its host’s addictions, marijuana has not yet been legalized on that show. In other words, whatever trouble you get into there, wiseguy Biden will be powerless to bail you out. Still, it would represent a new start. We’re all pulling for you.

Not.