In another burst of firsts, Lady Hillary continues to break records sounding like a broken record. How long will she persist in this this misery tour? Until she wins election on November 3, 2020? Will the Russians let her? Will James Comey? Will the Misogynists? Notice the Democrats themselves will have no say in this. Whatever she wants she’ll get. At least until Election Day.
We’d be more inclined to do our part had Lady H. participated in last weekend’s revelries. But she was a no-show at the punchless White House Correspondents’ Dinner, not to mention the no less charming Not the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. Someone named Samantha Bee hosted the latter — like Hillary she swears like a trooper though threw no lamps — and at her dinner’s high point pretended Hillary had won last November and seanced with her at the close of her first 100 days. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house by then, unless it was residue from oafish Will Ferrell’s appearance as Dubya the Painter, which at least leant some variety to the obsessives’ unfunny obsessions, a reminder that once there was more to their lives than ragging and raging at Donald Trump and boring everyone to death in the process and shortening their expected life span. (Actually, they were no less boring then, if slightly less deranged. But let’s not dwell on the past, if only because that’s where we’re most likely to come across them.)
So sad is the liberals’ plight that the normally callously cruel and unfeeling Jimmy Kimmel is spearheading the Democratic drive to save Obamacare for those less privileged than himself. Former President Obama has endorsed this ploy, not bothering to wait for those droves of Republican congressmen who would happily take the lead in this endeavor. Old habits die hard. He ignored them for eight years, so why give them time of day even when they’re his for the taking?
The situation is not entirely dire. Maybe former President Obama will show some cojones and insist on serious seven-figure numbers for his next Wall Street appearance instead of settling for a measly community-organizing fee of $400,000, which may not even cover his elder daughter’s gap year designer clothes expenses. Besides, shouldn’t he be raising serious money to keep his Iranian partners well greased as they count the years before resuming their nuclear crusade? When’s the next planeload of billions in bullion scheduled to land? Funny, by the way, that former President Obama has taken to tweeting. He’s like all of them: mock the president for being a tweeter even as they join in a futile effort to out-tweet him. They’re hopeless.
But the question remains: why aren’t those Republican congressmen mopping the Capitol floor with them? What does it say about how hopeless and useless they insist on being as well? It will serve them right if President Trump invites them all to the state dinner he will host for Kim Jung Un. For all we know, the naughty Un might find them tastier than dogs. Obamacare won’t save them then. Nor will this week’s Enemy of the Week prize.