“I just laid an egg and I’m resting,” said Henny-Penny, founder of The Holy Order of The Sky is Falling and its recording secretary. “While you’re resting,” I replied, “Let me give you some news.”
Ms. H-P: You mean you’ve stopped being skeptical about all the Himalayan glaciers melting by 2035?
Me: On the contrary, a new independent investigation cited that claim in the 2007 report of the UN’s Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change as one of several errors. It also called for “fundamental reform” of the IPCC.
Ms. H-P: What are a few little errors when the 2007 consensus of the IPCC report is that climate change is “unequivocal” and “probably caused by humans”?
Me: Bear in mind that the writers of IPCC reports are appointed by their respective governments and reflect the views of those governments, many of which have a political agenda. That is, they want a massive redistribution of wealth and resources from industrialized countries to non-industrialized ones.
Ms. H-P: The IPCC Chairman, Rajendra Pachauri, says the errors were minor.
Me: He’s the guy with the unruly comb-over, right? Maybe it’s folk wisdom, but behind an untidy appearance may lay an untidy mind. The InterAcademy Council, a group of national scientific academies called, for a limit of one six-year term for the IPCC leader plus a strong conflict-of-interest policy. That’s indirect criticism of Mr. Comb-Over’s eight years as the head of the IPCC and his desire to stay in that position for another four, through 2014 when the next IPCC report is due. It also reflects on his several contracts to advise energy and financial companies. He says there’s no conflict and that he donates the money he receives from them to a think tank he heads. No conflict?
Ms. H-P: The next IPCC Conference on Climate Change will be in Cancun in December and this time we must come up with a global agreement to curb greenhouse gas.
Me: Good luck. The last one in Copenhagen laid — if you’ll excuse me –an egg.
Ms. H-P: You skeptics will never be satisfied. What is it you want this time?
Me: One scientist who participated in two IPCC reports told the investigators that his doubts about man-made global warming were ignored. Others with doubts about the melting glaciers who reviewed the 2007 report before it was published were also ignored. The 2007 report also didn’t have a clear way to measure the “uncertainty” often expressed by scientists. For example, the report expresses “high confidence” that rain-fed agriculture would drop by 50 percent by 2020. The investigation concluded this assertion was based on weak evidence.
And so it goes.
Mr. Comb-Over claims he initiated the InterAcademy Council investigation. The fact is that the Himalayan glaciers statement was so far off base scientifically that when the report came out it caused a great deal of criticism, if not outright ridicule, and Pachauri found himself issuing a statement of “regret” about the blooper, and agreeing to an outside investigation.
Since this and other errors happened on his watch, it’s time for him to resign so that — as Washington politicians say when caught out — he can spend more time with his family.
Ms. H-P: Nevertheless, the last few years have been warmer than normal.
Me: To which I can only say, so what? Furthermore, this year your Global Hysterics friends have no cause of joy because the wild fire season has been much tamer than expected and the hurricanes have pooped out to tropical storms.