In a few weeks, autumn will begin. You know, that time when leaves, your hair, and just about everything falls. Apples, cider, and red-brown foliage. It’s time to say goodbye to summer and to these satirical summer columns with which…
My favorite beach has been invaded by Portuguese men o’ war. Not soldiers, but some kind of jellyfish that are not actually jellyfish. I would prefer if it were an invasion of soldiers — at least you drown them in…
As environmentalists keep pestering them with the excuse of saving the planet, marine animals are getting more and more fed up with humans, which makes stings and bites on the beaches more and more frequent. The sun is also in…
Older and more mature now, in matters of the heart I have come to the same conclusion as Dave Barry, who said “never again will I underestimate the persuasive power of a woman with legal training and big tits.” If…
The renowned Spanish author Gómez de la Serna used to say that to be bored is to “kiss death”; by the way, that is also what my friend Tony does before sleeping with his harpy girlfriend. Anyway, sometimes summer is…
Prehistoric man started his development by learning to hunt. His next challenge was to try to get on an inflatable unicorn in the pool. Man’s repeated failure in the struggle with the unicorn changed human evolution and led to the…
When I was a kid, the biggest beach towel was the size of a matchbox, and it was decorated with the faded 80s logo of some soft drink. It was also the thickness of a shrimp’s antenna, and its main…
The Sun is a giant star, with a diameter of 1.4 million kilometers, filled with hot gasses that environmentalists most probably, seeing as they are not caused by capitalism, couldn’t care less about. The sun burns away with a surface…
The history of literature and journalism is full of great authors who have published their works in serialized form in magazines and newspapers. Charles Dickens, Gustave Flaubert, G. K. Chesterton, Itxu Díaz, and Fedor Dostoievski, are just some of the…
