A pall has passed over Facebook. Hillary’s most dedicated supporters are so depressed, giant tears dripping down their embroidered sweatshirts, collecing into pools on the floorboards of their minivans, coloring their endless Facebook wall posts about their precious soccer-playing children with the kind of “blue” tinge they normally reserve for disappointing Grey’s Anatomy episodes. The White House has endorsed Joe Biden.
As Hillary Clinton flails around, desperate to overcome her email scandal, the White House has all but abandoned her in the water. Yesterday, they claimed that choosing Joe Biden over Hillary for Obama’s Vice President was a fantastic political decision – perhaps one of Obama’s best. Today, they’re papering social media with full-throated praise for America’s least influential Vice President (unless you consider his impact on Journey’s resurgence). According to the Obama Administration, Joe Biden has everything you need to be a President: attitude, aptitude and good looks to boot.
President Barack Obama “has indicated his view that the decision that he made seven years ago now to add Joe Biden to the ticket as his running mate was the smartest decision he had ever made in politics,” White House spokesman Josh Earnest told reporters at a briefing.
“I think that should give you some sense of the president’s view of Vice President Biden’s aptitude for the top job,” Earnest said.
Earnest is being modest. After all, Obama can’t make any official endorsements yet, since Biden isn’t officially in the race. Former Obama administration official and noted surrogate Dan Pfeiffer expressed a more…unfettered…opinion: Joe Biden is the greatest man to ever grace the Naval Observatory.
Let’s be fair. Joe Biden is really excellent at a lot of things. Backrubs, namely. Recalling they heyday of hair metal. Wearing aviator sunglasses. Securing entire truckloads of Natty Lite. Doing donuts on the White House lawn in full view of the Secret Service. But his expertise ends there; he’s never even had to cast a deciding vote in the Senate.
In reality, Biden is the “greatest VP ever” only if you fail to consider that men like John Adams, Thomas Jefferson and Teddy Roosevelt have all held the job. Dick Cheney may be Darth Vader, and that’s quite the accomplishment. And Al Gore invented the Internet, inspired Love Story, and personally cleaned up Love Canal – all before he was gifted with his secret superhero identity, Captain Planet.
Joe Biden is an interesting guy, and I think his blue collar appeal combined with the latent Stockholm Syndrome associated with the last remaining Barack Obama supporters could take him far – farther even than Hillary Clinton. But I’m not sure the White House should be going so far out on a limb.
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