In merrie olde England, the people talk funny, they drive on the wrong side of the road, and now it turns out they eat horses.

Millions of products have been pulled from British shelves as traces of horse DNA have been discovered “in school meals, restaurant dishes and hospital food, as well as supermarket products.”

But it’s not just the limeys. According to the AP:

Traces of horsemeat have turned up across Europe in frozen supermarket meals such as burgers and lasagna, as well as in in fresh beef pasta sauce, on restaurant menus, in school lunches and in hospital meals.

But why don’t we eat horse meat? Central Asian people do. It’s a wonderful source of protein, and reportedly “slightly sweet, tender, and low in fat.” If it’s true that you are what you eat, I’d much rather my build resemble a muscular steed than a cow.

Of course I’m joking. The thought of eating a noble and majestic horse makes me sick and sad. Being finicky about knowing the origin of your food and the pesticides applied thereto is supposedly a liberal thing. Call me a snob, but I, for one, am all for it.