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USPS: Radical Surgery Needed
May 17, 2013 | 20 comments
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No Fisker for Your Garage
April 22, 2013 | 50 comments
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A Breakthrough in Ukraine?
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Thatcher Passes
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Moving Ukraine’s Democracy Forward
March 13, 2013 | 8 comments
A Further Perspective
Europe’s Jerry Sandusky?
The only difference is that he wasn’t the justice minister in charge of his case.
In the Jerry Sandusky case Penn State officials closed their ears for years to rumors about his behavior. In the Netherlands, the alleged pedophile Joris Demmink, Secretary-General of the Dutch Ministry of Justice, has had a close friend thwart official investigations into his behavior. That friend? Himself. This cozy arrangement may be about to come to an end.
In the mid 1990s in Turkey, Demmink sexually assaulted numerous boys between the ages of 12 and 16, according to the Dutch attorney for two of the victims. They now demand prosecution. Attorney Adele Van Der Plas says one victim was 12 at the time he was brought by a police officer to Demmink’s chambers, where he was repeatedly sexually assaulted.
Now, three Dutch and three Turkish citizens have come forward publicly to identify Demmink as their molester. Van Der Plas cites four police reports that name him as a suspect. Yet, whenever official investigations have been launched, they ended up lacking “evidence,” for Demmink’s office had the last word on such investigations. His senior position in the government has caused other officials to close ranks when each investigation was abruptly terminated.
A periodic U.S. State Department human rights report on every country about human trafficking is a study in contradiction when it comes to the Netherlands. It gives it “Tier 1” status, a designation awarded to nations at the forefront of fighting child sex trafficking. Yet, its Netherlands report begins with the statement that it “…is primarily a source, destination and transit country for men, women and children subjected to sex trafficking and forced labor.”
A report from the U.S. Embassy at The Hague defends Demmink, saying, “The prosecutor’s office… concluded that there was no evidence to substantiate the allegations.” It also claims that recent statements by alleged Demmink victims, private investigators and a former police official are “unproven.” No wonder, considering Demmink’s ability to spike any investigation.
Attorney Van Der Plas minces no words: “There has never been a credible investigation into his behavior.” The reason: a criminal case would “touch the top power elite.” She adds, “If they investigate they will find massive fraud and corruption that Demmink has been able to deflect and insulate himself and many others.”
Our State Department’s contradiction has led three members of the U.S. House of Representatives Joseph R. Pitts, (PA), Frank Wolf (VA) and Christopher Smith (NJ) to write to Chairman Christian Ehler of the European Union’s Transatlantic Legislators’ Dialogue Steering Committee. They stated “that the Ministry (Demmink’s) may not be able to properly execute The Netherlands responsibilities under EU Decision 2004/68/JHS, on combating the sexual exploitation of children.” That’s an understatement.
They also asked Ehler to forward their concerns to the European Parliament’s Committee on Civil Liberties.
A letter to Turkish Prime Minister Erdogan by Rep. Ted Poe (TX) asked that the claims by young Turkish men that Demmink assaulted them when they were boys be treated “as a matter of urgency.” He wrote that “this issue should be thoroughly and promptly investigated, then handled by the appropriate judicial authorities of your country.”
In Washington, the policy director of the Rebecca Project for Human Rights, Kwame Fosu, has urged Congress to hold oversight hearings on the State Department’s contradictory report on human rights trafficking in the Netherlands. The group also held a recent street demonstration outside the New York offices of APG, the Dutch government’s main pension administrator.
Joris Demmink will retire shortly. When he does, he is expected to lose his protective shield of immunity from prosecution. He has built up significant pension funds to be paid him by APG. He is likely to take the money and run — as quickly as he can — to a country with which the Netherlands has no extradition treaty, there to continue molesting children.
The Rebecca Project has asked the U.S. Congress to pass a resolution intended to bar Demmink from entering the U.S. until “a transparent investigation… is conducted into his actions toward children.” It also wants any U.S. assets of Demmink frozen until this occurs.
International child advocates are calling on Queen Beatrix to become personally involved to make sure Demmink is brought to justice before he flees the Netherlands.
Gradually the ring of justice is closing around Joris Demmink, but time is running out. Will it fully close before he escapes? Will his enablers in the Dutch government allow him to slip out quietly or will they ensure that justice is done?
About the Author
Peter Hannaford was closely associated for a number of years with the late President Reagan, beginning in the California Governor’s office. His latest book is Presidential Retreats.
MelvinNC| 11.12.12 @ 6:27AM
All the beautiful women in the world and this....filth, has to get his jollies with young boys. I just find it unfathomable that Liberals think this type of deviant behavior is perfectly normal, aka Jerry Sandusky, as well as the myriad of other pedophiles that take refuge in government or academia.
I don't care how the elites think that this type of lifestyle is perfectly OK, it isn't.
"A July 16 City Journal article entitled “Perverting Justice” reported “Early this year, Los Angeles police arrested Mark Berndt, a longtime teacher at Miramonte Elementary School, on 23 counts of committing lewd acts on children between the ages of seven and ten. "
Then the California Teachers Union does the unthinkable, " California teachers union kills anti-pedophile law. SB 1530 dies in committee."
Unfortunately in this case justice will not even begin to be served, society needs to go back in how it dealt with these monsters in the past.
Joellen| 11.12.12 @ 9:11AM
Melvin, and again my cry, this is why America is not coming back = we walk the path of the evil one. These men (and women who are rapidly becoming child predators) are evil, and yet they are protected by the unions. GOD only can save us.
Bob K| 11.12.12 @ 11:28AM
Mr. Hannaford
You are engaging in the same journalistic nonsense as has taken place in all the the other cases involving pedophiles with connections or perceived connections.
You are ignoring the culpability of the Social Welfare agencies, the Police and the Prosecutors who almost certainly had prior knowledge of these activities activities and who did nothing to stop them. You can't hide activities like this over long periods of time without their cooperation and you know it.
Ask yourself why in the hell these people did not go public about this coverup of criminal acts and then write about their dereliction of duty for not doing so.
When they finally do, as in this case and in all of the past cases, political considerations are again the motivating reason.
Bob Grant| 11.12.12 @ 8:43PM
There are a few instances where the Soviet Union is superior to the United States. And this is one of them.
This POS would simply disappear and that would be the end of it:
Boris: "Vlad, have you seen Joris?"
Vlad: "I do not this person who you speak of. Would you like some government-issue potato flakes?"
Boris: "You are a fine man."
And Joris would never be thought or spoken of again
Bob Grant| 11.12.12 @ 8:43PM
Cor: Soviet Union "WAS"...
Rhoetus| 11.12.12 @ 10:43PM
Have him tried in Turkey.
Rhoetus| 11.12.12 @ 10:40PM
Rules for Conservatives @
http://www.saveamericanow.us.com
Jimbobogie| 11.13.12 @ 3:43PM
I'm not a lawyer and I don't play one on TV, but I believe that the word "alleged" should still appeart somewhere in the article.
TLP| 11.13.12 @ 3:59PM
Welcome back.
Obviously, last week's Election was a Kick in the Teeth. The Takers have become the Majority, and the rest of us have now been consigned to WORKING FOR THEM.
Up, is now Down. Black is White. And, Alex de Tocqueville has been replaced by Mao Tse Tung. (Or, is it - Dung? And, why do I give a Shit?)
Getting Rich, used to be The American Dream. Now it's an Obamaphone, an Unemployment Check, and a Pound of Government Cheese, hold the Onions.
We find ourselves staring at The End of the World, as we know it, and we don't know what to do.
Which brings us to Today's Contest.
TLP| 11.13.12 @ 4:48PM
Last week's Election was as Pivitol, as any Election the Free World has ever known.
It was an Election of American Exceptionalism vs. America as the source of Everything that's wrong with the World.
An Election of America as The leader of The Free World vs. America as just One Country out of Many.
An Election of Love of Country vs. A non stop Blame America First Apology Tour.
When I saw the results of this Most Corrupt Election in our History, and the Reelection of a man who is, by his own Words and Deeds, the Antithesis of everything we expect from a President of The United States, I saw The 300. I saw the Battle of Thermopylae.
I saw Leonites, as I looked at Romney. Standing at the Pass, as Greece's last line of Defense, against the Persian King - Xerxes - in the Personage of Barack Hussein Obama.
He stood there and fought, for the survival of the Only Republic in the World. For Freedom and Liberty, and his way of life.
I saw The Immortals, the faceless Army of Xerxes, in the Main Stream Media, in this Country. Moving ever forward, in the Servics of their King.
I saw, in Paul Ryan, the face of the Grrek Commander - Thermistacles - as he sought to hold back the Liberal Hoardes from making a Landing by Sea.
And, I saw the Greek Traitor - Ephialtese - who showed the Persians a way around Leonites and the Thermopylae Pass, in the form of all those White Voters who Stayed at Home on Election Night, because they did not get what they wanted.
TLP| 11.13.12 @ 4:58PM
The rest, as they say: Is History.
Everybody knows how we play the game.
I have taken a Story out of the Papers, and made it in to a Movie Analogy.
Your Mission, should you choose to accept it, is to come up with an Analogy of your own.
It can be a Movie, a Play, a Cartoon, Something from Penthouse Forum, a Joke, a Broadway Play, a Song, or your Last Grocery List.
It's up to you.
The Contest will run until Saturday at 7pm, with the Prizes being handed out at 8pm.
The Winner(s) will recieve an Autographed Copy of David Petaeous' Little Black Book, while the Loser(s) will be getting the Bill for the Tree Branch that I just had cut down, to make my Next Door Neighbor stop threatening me.
Good Luck. God Speed. And know that I'm writing this with no Underwear on.
What are you waiting for?
Go!
R Martin| 11.13.12 @ 9:35PM
"The Sting". The electorate is Doyle Lonnegan and they have no idea they've been had.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.13.12 @ 9:41PM
Somewhere in the ethereal afterlife, to the strains of Marvin Hamlisch playing Scott Joplin, Henry Gondorf and Hooker are scratching their heads, wondering how they got played, as well.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 6:15PM
Wasn't Henry Gondorf the Wizard in Lord of The Rings?
TLP| 11.14.12 @ 4:21PM
Brevity, truly is, the Soul of Wit, little Rickey.
However.
If I were You, I would take advantage of the Time you have, to delve into this a little more deeply.
Your Entry is Good.
But, I know you can do better.
You can do More.
R Martin| 11.15.12 @ 8:39PM
No I can’t. And I’m not rising to this two day old bait, even though I suspect there are a number of Biblical and Shakespearean analogies which might fit the theme. Besides, I was the undisputed winner last week so, in the spirit of magnanimity, I’ll give my fellow competitors a better chance by just going with this simple cameo.
mike 3/505| 11.16.12 @ 10:01AM
"The decline & fall of the Roman Empire. We have a corrupt central government, who feeds the masses with "bread & circuses" while the defense of the frontier goes to rot. We have state sanction of perversion and corrupt tax practices that encourage crime while killing productivity.
Second Choice: I vote for Pecos, "The Winds of War."
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 10:07AM
Wow. That was something. Almost normal.
I guess it's not 12 O'clock, anywhere.
Nicely done.
mike 3/505| 11.16.12 @ 6:56PM
I'm gonna start drinking now. More, again.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 7:33PM
Welcome back, Colonel.
If you scroll way down, I believe you might be able to take credit for Pecos Pete's Charge of The Light Brigade thingy.
It's that good.
mike 3/505| 11.17.12 @ 11:34AM
I saw it....but I can't take credit...I'm ME this weekend, not a statist government.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 10:04AM
As you wish.
I am putting the Bill for my Tree Branch, in the mail, as we speak.
And, nobody said that the Contest Started on any day other than Friday.
Some of you, apparently, are suffering from a Severe Case of some form of Preejacucontestentry Syndrome.
Don't blame me.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 10:07AM
That's for Little Ricky.
R Martin| 11.16.12 @ 11:32AM
Those of us from Delaware are always a little ahead of the game. And as to that Syndrome you mentioned, rest assured, it is never associated with thoughts of you.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:10PM
Yeah.
You guys are Geniuses.
How long has Bite Me been your Senator?
Stop being a Baby.
The Undisputed Winner?
You're good.
But I'm not too sure about the whole Undisputed thingy.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.13.12 @ 10:46PM
I never saw the movie “The Doors”, which was made in the early 1990s, starring Val Kilmer as Jim Morrison. One of the reasons that I wasn’t interested was, as much as I might enjoy the music, the more I learned about the man Jim Morrison, the more creepy and perverted I found him to be. While George Michael might wag his genitals around in an LA men’s room to make new friends, Morrison did it in front of a whole new arena. Who needs to seek out such a display on film, when Alan Brooks reminds us of this behavior every day?
After last week, though, instead of thinking of this film as the lionization of a pervert, I thought perhaps it was a coded message, telling us in ways subtle and not so subtle what the future held in store, through the music: “This is the End” had to be running through so many heads last week.”If you give this man a ride, sweet family will die” seems quite prophetic as well, and when he sang (referring to bitter clingers) “They got the guns, but we got the numbers” along with “Five to one, baby, one to five; No one here gets out alive”, he might have been working on the projection desk at any cable news network.
Instead of a half-naked Indian, perhaps the mythical figure was not a native American in a loin cloth, but a skinny bastard of mixed racial origin in a bath house towel. Then again, perhaps that’s what Morrison had in mind when he sang “Back Door Man”.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.13.12 @ 10:46PM
If that is the case, you might understand why I hesitate to call this an entry, but I toss this out as my first idea.
TLP| 11.14.12 @ 4:24PM
I smell little Black Book.
I wonder what shirt you were wearing when you penned this Masterpiece?
Che?
Jardino| 11.15.12 @ 6:48PM
Hi TLP ...
I thought your comment attached to a comment about Asians voting for Obama was a joke at first. When I read it again, I decided that you were a creative reactionary who likes to write. (Sarcasm confuses lots of people.)
Regarding your contest, GIRL WITH DRAGON TATTOO would go well with this article about Europe's Jerry Sandusky.
I think A FACE IN THE CROWD would be a good choice, too. It could be connected to Romney's 47% comment, or I could research what stupid things Huckabee has said and consider putting him in Andy Griffith's role.
However, truth is stranger than fiction. That's why I'd rather read the "true" comments at this site.
Sorry I don't have more time for your contest. It sounds more like a writing assignment than fun for me.
Buena suerte ...
Jardino
TLP| 11.15.12 @ 7:11PM
That's okay, Jardino, and I appreciate your Entry.
All week long, we bang our heads together, fighting over things that we cannot change.
Each Friday, we all come together to Leave all of the problems that we face, behind us.
We come here for Laughs, Fun, and Frivolity.
We all share a Comaradery, and let our hair down.
I am, indeed, very Grateful that you took the time to join us.
We are all Friends, here, and now you are one of us, as well.
Please, don't be a Stranger.
Have a wonderful Weekend.
TLP.
TLP| 11.15.12 @ 7:16PM
And, bye the way.......The Contest isn't about the Jerry Sandusky Story.
It's about my Analogy of the Election.
We're open until Saturday, at 7pm.
Feel free to submit as many Entries as you like.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.15.12 @ 10:25PM
I'm in the slow process of reading "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo". While I imagine the author would be uncomfortable in the company of the contest, from where I am in it so far, I think the plot might compare well to the election theme of this week's contest. The story starts where Blomquist loses in his criminal libel trial, and has to give up his job, lots of money and awaits a jail sentence. It sure feels like last week.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 10:11AM
You're reading The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo?
Really?
Why does that sound so Gay?
Because it IS?
Bob Grant| 11.16.12 @ 11:02AM
At the risk of offending Al and siding with TLP (I don't know which is worse), that book indeed has all the markings of gayness.
I sense a made-for-tv remake where Barry Bostwick plays the male lead and Susan Lucci the female.
It will go directly to the Lifetime Plus Network where it's debut will air @ 3:30 P.M. on a Saturday afternoon.
Al, I suggest you put the book down and have a glass of strong scotch to wipe away any remnants of it in your fertile mind.
We need your A-game here.
If you won't do if for yourself, do it for the Best Analogy Game on the Net!!
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 11:43AM
As my entries to this point indicate, I have my A game, my B game and all through the alphabet on display here today.
I am reading the book as while it is slow going, it is told from the worldview of a European socialist, and given current events, that it likely to be more relevant here in the days to come (so I might learn to understand it in order to defeat it).
I do feel the need for a testerone shot or two after reading a page, though.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 11:44AM
...that would be testosterone (damn, it is causing my spelling ability to deteriorate too).
TLP| 11.17.12 @ 7:26AM
You're starting to spell like a girl.
Get rid of the book.
HURRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
R Martin| 11.16.12 @ 1:18PM
I didn't think "Dragon Tattoo" was THAT gay. It was a pretty good read. OK, Lisbeth was a bit experimental but she was tough as nails, bright, vengeful and she got the bad guys good. Of course, I don't think many things are THAT gay, with the possible exception of certain parts of this contest, e.g. the "I feel pretty" exchanges between TLP and Pecos Pete.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 3:03PM
Thus far (I'm less than 200 pages into it) I'd say it is not so much gay as it is neutered.
Pecos Pete| 11.16.12 @ 5:03PM
Pretty is as Pretty does. And Tim is very PRETTY.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 5:28PM
That's true.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:13PM
Bob Grant is absolutely correct.
We need your A Game, this weekend.
Not your Gay Game.
Be a Man, and go get some Porn from Navritil.
mike 3/505| 11.16.12 @ 7:00PM
Did someone say, "scotch?"
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 7:36PM
You're unbelievable.
Oldefarte| 11.16.12 @ 12:38PM
Don't know the rules, but I'll offer a description of my inner thought [as to how I and many others as well felt] on 11/6/12's aftermath by submission of two movies: [1] THE DAYS OF WINE AND ROSES, where Jack Lemmon tried to save his wife Lee Remick from becoming controlled by alcoholism and failed, leaving him despondent; [2] LEAVING LAS VEGAS, where Elizabeth Shue tried to rescue Nicholas Cage from alcohol terminated death, but failed to do so!!!!!
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:16PM
Not bad for your first time, O.F.
Don't be surprised if you find a Milk Carton in your Mailbox.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 9:35PM
OF;
I love the LLV reference (and not only because Elizabeth Shue used to live in Delaware). It is as if the the majority of the electorate chose to drink itself to death last week.
Hopefully, some form of sobriety will begin to overtake them.
Oldefarte| 11.16.12 @ 10:04PM
AC, there ain't enough booze in the world capable of drowning out my sorrow over 11/6/12. I'm gonna join Thelma & Louise'ers in their T-Bird and predicting a trip off the cliff for this nation!!!!!
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:22PM
Just remember, OF, if we can't talk you out of driving off of the cliff, please allow us to provide you a list of those you might wish to land on once the law of gravity begins to be enforced.
TLP| 11.17.12 @ 7:32AM
And, take with you, as well.
Look at you. Wine and Roses. Leaving Las Vegas. Thelma and Louise.
You're a natural.
I'm emailing you, Bob Grant's phone number. Maybe you could give him some Tips, if that isn't too much trouble.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 9:35PM
OF;
I love the LLV reference (and not only because Elizabeth Shue used to live in Delaware). It is as if the the majority of the electorate chose to drink itself to death last week.
Hopefully, some form of sobriety will begin to overtake them.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:28PM
I don't know how this got posted twice, but there is nothing I can write that begins to approach the significance of whatever Alan's Girl might put forth.
Alan's Girl| 11.16.12 @ 1:42PM
TLP-
Boxers or Briefs? Just have to get my mind set before I compose.....
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 2:52PM
You're going to get Tim all hot and bothered again with this question.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:14PM
Thong.
Alan's Girl| 11.16.12 @ 4:55PM
Why is it when you say, "thong", I think of Candy Crowley?
Pecos Pete| 11.16.12 @ 5:04PM
Alan, to even think of Crisco Crowley in a thong means that you are sick, Sick, SICK. Where is Doctore Right when he is needed?
Oldefarte| 11.16.12 @ 10:06PM
I think I'm gonna reguritate!!!!!!!!
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 5:36PM
I'm thinking that you're confusing "Thong" with: A Large Meatloaf, Extra Grease, with a side order of a Whole Turkey, Mashed Potatoes and Gravy, and could you put Ice Cream on top of the Meatloaf, and Extra Cheese?
Oldefarte| 11.16.12 @ 10:07PM
Now I'm definately headed for the John!!!!!!!!!
Bob Grant| 11.16.12 @ 6:25PM
thinkin' of candy
in her thong not so dandy
epic struggle to make it fit
a winch, some torgue, and a bit o' wit
a can of crisco woulda been handy
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 9:52PM
Now here is a poem
that I've written from home
I'd try to be calm
as the world dropped napalm
on my house there with glee
to somehow punish me
for my part in the plot
to point to what Candy got
for we all know its wrong
to call a mainsail a thong
Oldefarte| 11.16.12 @ 10:08PM
OMG, now I'll never raise my head out of this toilet!!!!!!!!!!!
mike 3/505| 11.17.12 @ 11:38AM
Candy is the quintessential "woman for all seasons." Warm in the winter and a great source of shade in the summer.
Bob Grant| 11.17.12 @ 1:30PM
er... yea but you've got to rake her leaves in the fall.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.14.12 @ 8:50AM
TLP, it looks like the early start to the contest has confused some of the usual players, so I'll try to goose the process along, somewhat. After my somewhat petulant anti-Obama entry, I will go introspective with my second attempt.
My next entry will once again be in the genre of film, and once again will be a movie developed around a battle history book by Cornelius Ryan. As a sequel to “The Longest Day”, Hollywood in the late 70s adapted the story of Operation Market Garden, which was conceived by Britain’s Field Marshal Montgomery as a way to defeat Germany by Christmas, 1944 (but more importantly, bring glory to Montgomery and draw attention and resources away from Patton, who was enjoying great success in defeating German’s to Montgomery’s south).
Without getting bogged down in the historical accuracy, revisionism or interpretation, the plot of the film examines the audacity of the plan, and how, once committed to it, Montgomery’s command ignored critical intelligence about the quality and quantity of the opposition they would face, made nonsensical logistical and communications errors, and covered up failures by punishing the messengers who pointed out the shortcomings of the plan.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.14.12 @ 8:51AM
Once in action, though there was some initial success, the operation turned into a meatgrinder, leading to the death or capture of thousands of Allied soldiers, and a failure to achieve the critical strategic objective.
In ways that it is painful to point out, Montgomery represents the establishment Republicans, and Patton is the Republican conservative base. Operation Market Garden is the 2012 campaign. We fought hard (if not always well), and maintained a Republican Congress and gained some state houses, but suffered critical casualties (Senate Seats), and still came up a bridge sort (the Presidency).
While the movie sums up the campaign, from a continuing historical analogy, it is important to understand that there are more bad things coming (think of the second term as the Ardennes Offensive or Battle of the Bulge, and on the Eastern front, the Red Army represents the looming fiscal and cultural collapse).
TLP| 11.14.12 @ 4:30PM
Actually, The Contest doesn't Start until Friday.
But I understand your exhuberance.
As we speak, some of the Judges are mulling around in the Judges Area, chomping at the bit at the thought of Disqualifying half of the Crap that comes their way.
I get it.
TLP| 11.14.12 @ 6:17PM
I have an announcement to make, concerning the Prizes that are to be handed out.
The Winner(s) Prize will remain the same.
The Loser(s) Prize will also remain the same.
However........Anyone qualifying for an Honourable Mention, will recieve one of the Milk Cartons with Ross Kaminsky's Picture on them, that I had made up, as we haven't seen Hide nor Hair of our Great White Tourist, in quite some time.
That is all.
CJW| 11.15.12 @ 5:39PM
Since I cannot write poetry, I offer the pep talk by Aenas, by Virgil in the Aenid:
"A joy it will be one day, perhaps, to remember even this. Through so many hard straits, so many twists and turns our source holds firm for Latium. There Fate holds out a homeland, calm, at peace, there the gods decree the kingdom of Troy will rise again. Bear up. Save your strength for better times to come."
The new kindom of Troy and Latium are the restoration of our self reliant, free market American republic.
TLP| 11.15.12 @ 7:19PM
I like it.
You may not win the Little Black Book.
But, if you don't?
I'm thinking that you're a Shoe in for a Milk Carton with Kaminsky's picture on it.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.15.12 @ 10:16PM
I'm all choked up, particularly when I consider the condition of Greece today.
CJW| 11.16.12 @ 8:04AM
The Greeks gave us philosophy, literature, and civilization, and colonized the Meditarenean. They fought and beat the Turks for their independence. And they gave us the modern diner.
Now, after obama-type government, they are a nation of purps.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 8:26AM
If this last week teaches us anything, it is that it is a short trip from hero to zero. Said another way:
one day you're the hero of The Surge
the next you're the victim of a purge
because you gave in to an urge
your career now hears its funeral dirge
its sad to see how fast you fell
as we see our country speed to hell
with a muslim trailer tale to sell
I guess it doesn't end (Broad)well
Pecos Pete| 11.16.12 @ 8:42AM
Albert: That was damn good!
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 8:54AM
Gracias, Pedro (as if you don't hear enough in Spanish in NM already).
CJW| 11.16.12 @ 10:17AM
Albert,
Excellent. I almost feel sorry for Petraus, except that if he lied about the deaths of four Americans, then the hell with him.
Fox reported that the intelligence talking points given to Susan Rice were edited by the WH. As if that is news. Still, once Petraus heard Rice's lies he should have spoken.
It seems Obama selected Rice to hit the Sunday shows because she is loyal and not that smart. She probably believed what she read. My guess is Hillary and Panetta refused to do the Sunday dog and pony show, so that left Rice.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:35AM
I figured it was kind of "You want to replace Hillary? Get out there and show us what you can do" before anyone realized they were strapping a suicide bomber's vest to her.
I don't think there's much left for her to do beyond walking into a crowd, screaming "Allahu Akhbar" and thumbing the detonator now.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:22PM
All this Greek talk.
Considering that I picked this particular Story to place the Contest, in Honour of Purp, Pelleas, and Alanthere'snotenoughhaironmyhotdog Brooks?
I'd say that anything "Greek" only justifies my choice of Venues, and those it Honours.
TLP| 11.17.12 @ 10:34AM
And, you are right, when you remind us that have given the world SO DOManY things.
Pecos Pete| 11.15.12 @ 6:54PM
The Winds of War by Herman Wouk is the source of this entry. This analogy ain't pretty.
There are several "speeches" by Hitler in the book/screen play where Hitler's ego and narcissism are on full display and which are very similar to Obama's speeches and persona. Thus, Obama as Hitler.
While not the same gender, Michelle as Hermann Goering are matched perfectly for their huge appetites for food and luxury.
General Petraeus and the Joint Chiefs of Staff, for their failure to protect our people at Bengahazi and Afghanistan, represent the German military officers who went along to get along.
Valerie Jarrett as Martin Bormann.
David Axelrod / David Plouffe jointly as Joseph Goebbels.
Hillary Clinton as Joachim von Ribbentrop.
Eric Holder as Heinrich Himmler.
Janet Napolitano as Reinhard Heydrich.
The remaining current administration's Cabinet Secretaries fill out the cast of characters representing the German NAZI government.
Mein Kampf is, of course, Obama's Dreams From My Father.
I can think of no comparable personalities for Winston Churchill, FDR, Ike, Patton, MacArthur, etc. They must be out there somewhere. Certainly not McConnell and Boehner.
And that leads me to the final comparison: The USA today is Germany in the 1930s.
As I said, it ain't pretty, but it is an analogy.
TLP| 11.15.12 @ 7:14PM
That's okay.
You're Pretty, and that's enough.
Remember.
We're open all weekend.
I look forward to further Entries from you.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.15.12 @ 10:14PM
Oui, mon Pierre. I think you've got a good thing going with your entry, so please allow me to pick a nit or deux (oder zwei, ob wir Deutsch sprechen wollen).
Hermann Goering was a bonafide flier war hero in the First World War, before he became the decadent evil head of the Luftwaffe, defending and propping up a regime who wanted total control over the lives of those under the thumb of the regime. Michelle, on the other hand, probably couldn't take over the controls of Air Force One in an emergency.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:24PM
And, shouldn't Valerie Jarrett be: Marcia Bormann?
Pecos Pete| 11.16.12 @ 5:14PM
TLP: Who is Marcia Bormann? Looked her up and found her in South Dakota. On the other hand, Gerda was 19 when she married Martin and Valerie was never 19.
Not to put to fine a point on it, but are you really as Pretty (spelled: P R E T T Y) as Albert says you are?
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 5:48PM
I'm way prettier than that, and you can call my wife. (That last part was from an old song by somebody) "I'm a Faithful Follower of Brother John Birch........"
And, as far as Marcia Bormann, in South Dakota?
She sounds Pretty, too.
Just not as pretty as me.
Of that, I'm certain.
Pecos Pete| 11.16.12 @ 5:57PM
Somebody? Golly gee whiz you metrosexist you. It was Charlie Daniels!
Just one of the verses:
"Old Tim, He's a snake in the grass, I tell ya guys
He may look dumb but that's just a disguise
He's a mastermind in the ways of espionage"
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 6:26PM
What just happened?
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.15.12 @ 10:29PM
Before Oklahoma was lawfully opened up to non-tribal settlement, many settlers snuck in and staked out land claims. As a result, residents of the state are sometimes referred to as "Sooners", in honor of their arrival before opening day.
I'm glad to see that spirit alive and well in the contest this week.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 10:16AM
Actually, the people who snuck in here and staked their claims, are probably a lot more likely to be referred to as "Losers" than they ever would - "Sooners".
I'm just sayin.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:31AM
There's nothing that says we can't be both.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:25PM
You make a good point, Sir.
Paul McGrath| 11.15.12 @ 10:56PM
I may be jumping out of the gate a little early, Tim, but it hit me last night--another sleepless night--and I felt I must throw my hat in the ring.
This one isn't a parody or a satire--your Wizard of Oz thing was brilliant by the way--or Hitler in Germany or Stalin in the USSR or Robespierre, it is the real thing, an American thing, and it happened right here, and it is happening right now on a national scale.
I'm surprised no one has mentioned it:
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 10:20AM
I'm surprised, as well.
I'm also STUNNED at the lack of Sucking Up, that goes on around here.
These people could learn a lot from you, Paul.
A lot, indeed.
What was your Analogy, again?
Something about Coca~Cola?
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:37PM
C'mon people.
That was funny.
Paul McGrath| 11.15.12 @ 11:12PM
On the Waterfront. Marlon Brando, Lee J. Cobb, Rod Steiger. The ships coming into the port are American wealth. Lee J. Cobb is Obama, and his cronies are the Democrats. The dockworkers are Americans. The Democrats decide who gets to work and when. If they like you, you work. You get an easy job. If you piss them off, you don't work for a few days. If you really piss them off, they throw you off a roof.
Every day you go to the dock to beg for crumbs. If you don't get work, you maybe have to borrow money from the loan shark. Who is owned by the mob. Or maybe you spend your money at the bar. Which is owned by the mob, also. In any way you look at it, you are DEPENDENT ON THEM.
They divvy up the money amongst themselves and live well and wear nice clothes, they decide who gets what and when, and all of the workers are hanging on by the skin of their teeth. Nobody lives well. Everybody is dependent on the benificence of the unions. Some fight it. Most try to get along with it. All are terrified of it.
This is where we are now. Except instead of the docks of New York, it is the entire country. We are being run by a mob.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 7:30AM
I guess its just not our night...
CJW| 11.16.12 @ 10:22AM
Paul
Good comment.
"The Waterfront" is great, we used it several weeks ago.
Remember the scene at Johnny Friendly's office with all the lackeys sitting around and the famous saying was "Deaf and Dumb." Nobody heard or saw anything. That seems to describe the Obama explanation of BenghaziGate.
Paul McGrath| 11.16.12 @ 11:09AM
I knew it! The similarities are so striking that I figured someone had to come up with it.
It's scary that this film portrays exactly what is going on in this country.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:29PM
That is an excellent entry, Paul.
If it should happen that you don't win one of the Prizes? I smell my Underpants.
Seriously. I'm smelling my underwear.
I really need to do a Load of Laundry.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 7:32AM
Alright, now for my first Friday entry.
In the 1966 film “Lost Command”, the movie is primarily about the war for Algerian independence from France . It opens in Viet Nam circa 1954, as the French Foreign Legion under Anthony Quinn and other troops are defeated by the Communist Viet Minh at Dien Bien Phu. As Quinn and his troopers march past their captors into the captivity that will precede their loss of Viet Nam, they manage to steal the keys from the command jeep, and tromp them beneath their feet in the mud, denying their tormenters the use of the equipment, and showing their defiance even in the face of defeat.
Last week felt like losing a major battle, perhaps even a war. Still, while my own experience with military jeeps never involved one that started with a set of keys, I look forward to stomping Obama’s keys into the mud at every opportunity until we can escape, regroup, and fight another day.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:42PM
That's what we're looking for.
I'm looking at the Judges, and they're giving me The Finger.
I'm really not sure what that means, as far as your Entry is concerned.
It could be nothing.
Stkman| 11.16.12 @ 8:51AM
This election reminds of history repeating itself. Letz go back about 237 years.
The players are:
Patriots: those of whoe who would rather work and give than take and take.
The Torries: Those who would side with a King who would make them into serfs, who contribute nothing but take all they can.
The Forefathers: Tea Party and the Oath Keepers
The King/Dictator: The Kenyan
The story, its short, its simple and its sweet. It goes like this.
Stkman| 11.16.12 @ 8:55AM
The King oversteps his promises and his authority. Shortly after he retakes the throne he finds his treasury is somehwat short of what is required to keep the Torries happy and in line.
Quietly yet quickly the Patriots gather the necassary tool, implements, shot, powder and balls (both kinds, figure it out) so that they can get in position to remove the Kenyan.
At the same time the forefathers start making political moves. First they make a suprise attack in Congress and vote for a new leader. Someone with backbone, courage and a strong beleif in the Patriots and their abilities to guide the country through these dark times.
Stkman| 11.16.12 @ 9:00AM
The Torries, discontent with the lack of freebies and broken promises begin what everyone knew they would do. They take to the streets in anger, taking what does not belong to them. This has an affect that the Dictator wasn't prepared for though, thats half of those who supported him have now come to their senses and see that they are owed nothing. That the ways of their parents and grandparents were the right way to live.
As the Dictator tries to regain control over the Torries he loses sight of the Patriots, who by now have moved into position around the White Castle (I know, it's a hamburger chain, so sue me), and have also begun an invasion County Cook.
Stkman| 11.16.12 @ 9:05AM
When the Dictator realizes what has happened he calls on his generals, to find that they are actually Patriots who have been waiting on the those without rank to stand up for themselves,as they swore an oath to the Constitution and not the Dictator.
The Dictator once again over reaches and calls on the his Hessian friends(U.N.) to intervene on his behalf. The Hessian, being the cowards they have always been decline the offer seeing as how there are over 300 million guns in the hands of private citizens.
Stkman| 11.16.12 @ 9:10AM
Once the battles have started, it doesn't take long for the Patriots to once again bring freedom back to the country.
The Dictator, who is found out to have never been a citizen is hung, as are many of his accomplises. The evil and dispicable Nevadan, the mentally deranged woman who could not read until after it was law, both huing on the steps of the capital.
There was also a purge of those who were called Benedict Arnolds (RINO's). They we also hung as they were greedy and would have all become serfs for their own enrichment.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 9:19AM
...and then the process is repeated every four score to 237 years...
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:45PM
Finally.
Something from Penthouse Forum.
Well done, Stkman.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:50PM
I'm kidding.
That was an Excellent Entry, and a wonderful Shout Out to this Contest's Honourees, with all that talk about guys that are Hung.
Still kidding.
Nice job.
Stkman| 11.16.12 @ 9:14AM
The Constitution once again became the law of the land. The newly formed government's first action was to remove any questions regarding ones race from any application of any kind.
The second action was to remove any able bodied person from welfare rolls. Those who needed temporary assistance were aided with an understanding that it was in fact, temporary aid. Only those with true disabilitites were given prolonged aid.
The third action the government took was an act of self control. Term limits for all Congressional members.
The fourth action, a laws was passed that the Congress shall enact no law that they themselves do not have to abide by.
The fifth action, that there would be no benefits for any member of Congress once they left Congress. That would include no retirement.
Stkman| 11.16.12 @ 9:15AM
Within one year of the newly formed government America was once again in her rightful place as leader of the free world. Both her allies and her enemies once again respeced her.
God Bless the United States of America!
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 9:20AM
Sorry, I jumped in in the middle not realizing you were providing a happy ending here.
Stkman| 11.16.12 @ 9:27AM
No problem Al, and your comment is what our forefathers told us to do. They figured every forty years or so the government would become too corrupt to properly serve We the People. Damn those guys were smart. Do you think they prayed to God for guidance? And wouldn't it be neat if Goerge Washington were alive today. We could watch it live in living color as he runds his sword through the Dictator and declares America free!
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 9:40AM
...""A Republic, if you can keep it"...
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:53PM
When the Government no longer serves to the benefit of the people. It is the Duty of the people to Replace that Government.
The Declaration of Independence.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:53PM
Penis.
Joellen| 11.17.12 @ 9:09AM
Not if Andrew Cuomo has his way Stkman - NO COLOR DRIVERS LICENSE FOR YOU in NYC! So before long everything will be in the black & white 50's that they the left so detest - ironic isnt it.
Ranting here - in case you dont know. Cuomo of NYC (refuse to call him Gvnr); is outsourcing to Canada at and increase of about $40 million, DMV drivers license pictures, which will only be in black & white; and dont forget ABSOLUTELY NO SMILING ALLOWED! Cant make this up.
TLP| 11.17.12 @ 10:54AM
Actually, I had a great time at the DMV. Those people in line Get Me. I was there for an hour an a half, and I had everybody rolling in the aisles.
There was even talk of the DMV putting up a Plaque in my Honour.
And, No - Bob Grant - it's not gonna be near any of the Toilets.
Bob Grant| 11.17.12 @ 1:32PM
Uh TLP,
Look closer. That was a Most Wanted List.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 7:59AM
Don't you mean "Least Wanted"?
Stkman| 11.18.12 @ 11:05PM
Wow a plaque, I heard we would all have our pictures hanging in the post office very soon.
By the way, I had a great time at the gun show this weekend. Ar or AK? 30 round clip or barrel?Decisions decisions.
Joellen| 11.17.12 @ 6:34AM
Stkman, that's a story ending I can go for. We can only pray.
TLP| 11.17.12 @ 7:42AM
Good Morning, Joellen.
I'm heading off to Motor Vehicle.
Hope your day has a better start.
Joellen| 11.17.12 @ 8:27AM
Just make sure your hat is on backward and you have that glazed look on your face - you'll fit right in.
Joellen| 11.17.12 @ 8:30AM
Tm, And that's just the workers I'm referring to (somehow this comment went to the bottom of the page).
Pecos Pete| 11.16.12 @ 9:41AM
The Charge of the Light Brigade
by Alfred, Lord Tennyson
Half a league, half a league,
Half a league onward,
All in the voting booth
Rode the Patriots.
"Forward, the voters!
"Charge for the ballots!" Romney said:
Into the voting booth
Rode the Patriots.
"Forward, you Patriots!"
Was there a man dismay'd?
Not tho' the Patriots knew
Someone had blunder'd:
Theirs not to make reply,
Theirs not to reason why,
Theirs but to do and die:
Into the voting booth
Rode the Patriots.
Takers to right of them,
Food stamps to left of them,
Free gas in front of them
Volley'd and thunder'd;
Storm'd at with welfare and plunder,
Boldly they rode and well,
Into the voting booth,
Into the mouth of Hell
Rode the Patriots.
Pecos Pete| 11.16.12 @ 9:42AM
Flash'd all their ballots bare,
Flash'd as they turn'd in air,
Sabring the democrats there,
Charging an army, while
All the world wonder'd:
Plunged in the polling-smoke
Right thro' the line they broke;
Marxists and Takers
Reel'd from the voting stroke
Shatter'd and sunder'd.
Then they rode back, but not
Not the Patriots.
Takers to right of them,
Food stamps to left of them,
Free gas behind them
Volley'd and thunder'd;
Storm'd at with welfare and plunder,
While Patriots fell,
They that had fought so well
Came thro' the voting
Back from the mouth of Hell,
All that was left of them,
Left of the Patriots plundered.
When can their glory fade?
O the wild votes they made!
All the world wondered.
Honor the votes they made,
Honor the Patriots plundered,
Yet, Noble Patriots wondered,
Where were the Republicans?
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:43AM
The sequel refrain:
On their behinds sat the Three Million...
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 4:57PM
That, my friend, has just earned you one of the Autographed Little Black Books.
You hit the nail right on the head.
May they all Rot in Hell.
(Where's Kennesaw?)
CJW| 11.16.12 @ 6:37PM
But those three million have their principles, who cares about the country.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 7:40PM
So true.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 5:01PM
Incredible, P.P.
This Contest is turning in to a Mensa Meeting.
You guys are Unbelievable.
You would think that Colonel mike 3/505 would be here, taking credit for that one.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 5:52PM
You are definately one of the Weiners.
Did I say Weiners?
I meant: Winners.
Sorry. I was looking at myself in the mirror.
I am Pretty, and people like me.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 6:29PM
Why do I think that I'm the only one who thinks I'm funny?
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:11PM
Al Franken is banned from the contest.
mike 3/505| 11.17.12 @ 11:43AM
I will...next time I play Obama.
Stkman| 11.16.12 @ 9:55AM
There Liberals to the left of me,
RINO's to the right,
Here I am stuck in the middle withTim,
Stuck in the middle with Tim.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:06AM
Is it beyond irony that the group that recorded that was "Stealer's Wheel"?
Bob Grant| 11.16.12 @ 2:38PM
On a side note, that group totally ripped off Sheryl Crow's first hit.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 2:54PM
I'm not sure if I get it, after all, all I want to is have some fun.
Bob Grant| 11.16.12 @ 4:23PM
There was controversy whether Sheryl Crow stole elements of Stuck in the Middle With You and inserted them in her song, All I Want...
Stealer's Wheel considered suing Sheryl Crow but I'm not sure if they actually pursued it.
The toilet paper nazi apparently dodged a bullet.
Bob Grant| 11.16.12 @ 4:43PM
My attempt at Verbal Irony (or is it Sarcasm?) fell flat, I suppose.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 5:04PM
It surely did not.
Nice.
It's a shame that I have to deduct all those points.
It's a Damn Shame.
Bob Grant| 11.16.12 @ 8:54PM
Speaking of nazis.
Hardcard| 11.16.12 @ 11:14AM
abbott & costello meet the wolfman ?
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 11:51AM
I seem to recall the last time I saw that film (I think it was in 1969, which was the year we got color TV, so I couldn't understand why the movie wasn't in color), by the end, all of the creatures were fighting one another, falling out of the castle windows and the like.
Sort of like what might happen when the union energy workers realize how the radical environmentalist and illegal alien lobbies they joined with to elect and reelect the current POTUS are keeping them from having work.
I think your entry works well...
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 5:07PM
Or, the Hostess Union Workers, who originally agreed to Hostess' offer, only to have their Union Leaders tell Hostess to Fck Off.
Joellen| 11.17.12 @ 6:47AM
Best A&C is "Abbott & Costello meet Frankenstein". And so, although I am skiming off Hardcard (ala Doris Kerns, Mike Barnical, and all those so called reporters who plagerize) allow me to proceed.
Lou & Bud are those Americans, just trying to do a job. Of course something sinister is afloat. You have the "union dock thug" who keeps messing with poor Lou. You have the warewolf (tea party) who tries to warn Lou/Bud/America that something evil is afloat; and you have Nurse Sandra/Susan Rice who denies and hides and is actively part of the plan to remove the brain/constitutution of poor Lou/America. Dracula of course would be Obama and Frankenstein would be the dummed down/brainless part of America that is beholden to their master.
Joellen| 11.17.12 @ 7:08AM
Although Lou/America & the wolfman/teaparty seem to be at odds with each other, one is uninformed America, the other the racist, aggresive Tea Party American (these definations would be according to our media), they know Dracula is who he is and they know whats really going on and although they try to warn America, no one wants to listen or believe, including Bud/our Republican elected leaders. Dracula abducts Lou to begin his nasty experiment of transforming Lou's brain to Frankensteins/The lefts abduction of our Constitutuion to be replaced with the communist manifesto. Finally Bud wakes up/the Republican Party; and with the help of the good Doctor/the rest of America comes to rescue Lou. The ultimate sacrifice though is done by the Wolfman who loses his life to destroy Dracula/Those good Americans who contineu to expose all of Obama's crimes against America/Rush Limbaugh, Mark Levin/Tea Party/James O'Keefe/Fox News, etc. and their loyalty to America is ridculed and demeanize by the left. But through their determination to stop evil, Frankenstein/those who wish to destroy America is burned to a crisp, never to rise again; or so we think. For, as Lou & Bud relax, thinking they are safe once again, up pops the Invinsible Man - and so the battle of good vs evil continues.
Bob Grant| 11.16.12 @ 2:30PM
After reading the headlines, I'm shocked no one has used the demise of Hostess Brands as a metaphor for the demise of America.
A company whose colors red, white, and blue and whose products are an apt reflection of the greatness of choice and variety in America: We are free to indulge in a wide array of tasty confections that might not necessarily be good for us but can do so to our heart's content, or when our heart gives out. Which ever comes first. In obamaland, choice means freedom. And freedom is the enemy.
Unions vs Job Providers: Hostess Brands was no match for the locust-like union thugs who are only interested in making a little scratch for the bosses and destroying corporations out of revenge. To them, sacrificing 18,000 jobs was simply collateral damage. The obama administration in a nutshell.
...
Bob Grant| 11.16.12 @ 2:30PM
...
Food Police vs Providers of Products and Services: If the union didn't destroy Hostess Brands, the food police surely would have. Obamacare, coupled with michelle (who put the Ho in Ho Ho's) obama would have eventually targeted Hostess Brands as enemy number one, labeling them and others in the confection business, as the number one contributor to early-onset diabetes, obesity, and other health-related causes. Because we are all paying for one another's healthcare, surely you can see why this company must go?...no?
...
This may or may not be my entry, depending on how inspired I might become. Perhaps this could be my "mulligan" in the likely event I write an even better one.
Bob Grant| 11.16.12 @ 2:46PM
Actually, my "mulligan" in the UN-likely event I write a crappier one.
Hmm. Not sure why I got that ass backwards, but it DOES explain why I was allowed more mulligans than everyone else while playing golf.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 5:15PM
If you look just above you? You'll see that I just mentioned Hostess.
You're definitely on to something.
You just need to Phrase it in the form of an Analogy.
Time to get busy.
Bob Grant| 11.16.12 @ 9:18PM
Well TLP,
I appreciate the advice. I'll dedicate the remainder of the weekend correcting the obvious errors which musta slipped past me. I'll have it polished up in no time.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 2:57PM
BG;
I think it works, though with Hostess gone, Little Debbie is probably thinking she can grow to into Big Debbie now, and Tasty-Kake Bakery is probably smacking their lips, as well.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 5:16PM
I'm thinking that they're thinking that: THEY ARE NEXT.
Bob Grant| 11.16.12 @ 8:44PM
I've never had the pleasure of a Tasty-Kake confection. They must be regional. I must say, however, their cute little mis-spelling of cake doesn't impress me so Michelle can have em.
Little Debbie?
StarCrunch?...Swiss Cake Rolls?....Banana Twins?...Zebra Cakes?
A line will be crossed!!
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:14PM
Send me your shipping address to albertconstantinejr@gmail.com and I'll forward some to you, Mr. Grant.
TLP| 11.17.12 @ 7:48AM
I knew that was you, working at that WAWA in Dover.
I knew it!
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.17.12 @ 10:45AM
That used to be the spot to get the cheapest gas in Delaware (as if I would drive 50 miles out of the way to save 10 cents per gallon).
Alan's Girl| 11.16.12 @ 3:31PM
I have been near despondency since 11/6, so much so that my normally fertile imagination is as dry as a bone. UNTIL Mr. Grant brought up the Hostess demise. As a former bakery/restauranteur, and having had a bakery mail order business, I can only imagine the headaches of management re: the negotiations with the union. If, as an operator of an interstate commercial food business, you have an incidence where you must shut down operations for 7 days, the FDA requires that you dispose of all production stock. This means ALL: produced items in storage, ALL pre-production ingredients- wet (dairy, eggs) & dry (flours, sugars. leavenings) & totally sanitize the entire production line(s). The decision to temporarily shutdown a food production operation is an expensive one, & not taken lightly. Add to that, the operator who cares about the people he or she employs spends many sleepless nights before & after the decision is made.
R Martin| 11.16.12 @ 4:51PM
AG, do not get despondent. Remember the film "Ferris Bueller's Day Off"? Ferris and his friends are in the upscale Chicago restaurant, and he’s pretending to be Abe Froman, the sausage king of Chicago. The Maitre D’, snooty, pompous and effeminate, tries to brush them off. This exchange occurs:
Cameron: Okay Ferris, can we just let it go, please?
Sloane: Ferris, please. You've gone too far. We're going to get busted.
Ferris: A: You can never go too far. B: If I'm gonna get busted, it is not gonna be by a guy like THAT.
Obama is the Maitre D' and you should never get despondent over a guy like that. No matter what.
Alan's Girl| 11.16.12 @ 5:00PM
Thanks, RM. This lady has never let a Maitre D' get her down. The image of Obama in a tux at a host stand is quite intriguing.....yes! I think you've just brightened my mood! He is now at MY disposal!
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 5:20PM
There you go.
As we speak, I'm faking an Orgasm, reading your newest Entry, ala Meg Ryan in: When Harry Met Sally.
I knew you could do it.
Alan's Girl| 11.16.12 @ 3:32PM
No, this isn't an entry, just a vent. I'm not sure what the answer is to America's future. I know that the answer is not in D.C. We must teach our children well- teach them how to look for the answers.
You who are on the road
Must have a code that you can live by
And so become yourself
Because the past is just a good bye.
Teach your children well,
Their father's hell did slowly go by,
And feed them on your dreams
The one they picked, the one you'll know by.
Don't you ever ask them why, if they told you, you would cry,
So just look at them and sigh and know they love you.
And you, of tender years,
Can't know the fears that your elders grew by,
And so please help them with your youth,
They seek the truth before they can die.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 5:21PM
Bingo.
CJW| 11.16.12 @ 6:35PM
Is this Crosby, Stills, Nash, Young, Schwartz, Mumar, Albano, Smith, Jones,....?
Good entry.
KennesawJack| 11.16.12 @ 7:37PM
Best, in my opinion.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 7:43PM
Finally.
Where have you been?
Bob Grant said you were dead.
KennesawJack| 11.16.12 @ 7:55PM
Well, according to my wife I've been in a zombie-like state since Tuesday of last week.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 3:48PM
Are we going to need to plan a safari to Detroit to find Nick? He hasn't been at the contest or site for weeks.
Bob Grant| 11.16.12 @ 4:40PM
Al,
Your ability to choose the most appropriate words are on display yet again.
Indeed, a safari IS what's needed for a manhunt in Detroit these days.
Anyone read the papers lately?
One needs a machete, can of mace, and a fully-loaded revolver just to go watch the Tigers play.
Coming to a broke city near you.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 5:24PM
Where is Navritil? Where is Kennesaw Jack?
Where is a lot of people, like Joellen? Stephie? Nancy in NC? Von Mises Jr.?
Hello?
Pecos Pete| 11.16.12 @ 5:48PM
To The Honorable Judge, Jury and Hangman: They are somewhere in Galt's Gulch soon to be renamed in your honor: Tim's Zen Ravine. We have quite a crew somewhere, here.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 6:32PM
Indeed.
mike 3/505| 11.16.12 @ 7:48PM
Quite.
Simon Templar| 11.16.12 @ 6:06PM
We are living the movie, 'Atlas Shrugged,' literally. So much so, life is becoming surreal.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 6:33PM
It's like a Nightmare.
KennesawJack| 11.16.12 @ 7:24PM
Only it isn't. With a nightmare you can wake up and it goes away. This, I'm afraid, ain't going away for awhile.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:55PM
It is important to recall, Mr. Templar, that your namesake Saint was created to help free the oppressed (or so Leslie Charteris might like to think).
KennesawJack| 11.16.12 @ 7:10PM
Tim, my apologies for my tardiness.to the contest. To say this has been a depressing 9 days would be an understatement of the highest order. In any event, unlike my more talented colleagues on this site, I’ve had a difficult time getting the creative juices flowing since the recent attempt by my country to commit Sepuku. In trying to figure out what the hell just happened, I kept searching for a story or poem (remember, I don’t do movies very much) that would present something analogous to this most unfortunate event. Here’s what I came up with. Robert W. Service, while wandering around the Yukon during the gold rush of the late 19th century wrote volumes of poems about the hardships of life in the frozen north.
KennesawJack| 11.16.12 @ 7:10PM
One of my favorites is “The Ballad of the Brand”. This is a tale of a hard-working man, Tellus, the Blacksmith, totally dedicated to the well-being of the love of his life, his wife. For purposes of the contest, Tellus, in this instance represents all the patriots, past and present, who sacrificed everything for the well-being of this country (the wife). As the tale unfolds, Tellus’ wife comes under the spell of Philo, a handsome, shallow, vapid ladies’ man (think Obamarx, here) and surrenders her honor to him. Tellus eventually discovers what Philo (Obamarx) has done to his wife (our Country) and exacts a truly fitting revenge. (and it ain’t by voting). Those interested in learning what happens, just Google Robert W. Service or “The Ballad of the Brand” and read the poem. It is a short, easy read. Hopefully, after a day in Athens tomorrow tailgating (think beer (Yuengling) and brats (Johnsonville) then watching Georgia beat up on Georgia Southern then coming home to watch my beloved Syracuse Orangemen do a number on Missouri, all the while doing my best to reduce the current Yuengling inventory in Georgia, I will maybe, just maybe, get out of this funk, but it ain't gonna be easy.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 7:46PM
Was that a Poem, or a Hymn?
I always get those two, mixed up.
Glad you could make it, Jack.
KennesawJack| 11.16.12 @ 8:47PM
In this case, Timmy, it might have been both.
Pecos Pete| 11.16.12 @ 7:48PM
KJ: We all should yield to your offering. This is why I enjoy Tim's Friday Contest. Thank you!
KennesawJack| 11.16.12 @ 7:53PM
Thanks, Pete.
TLP| 11.16.12 @ 8:14PM
I agree with Pete.
I was gonna call him as the winner.
But now you're the winner.
Maybe.
CJW| 11.16.12 @ 8:34PM
K Jack
Just read the poem. Very good selection.Things will get better.
Petraus testified the CIA report to the WH said it was a terrorist attack on Benghazi. When it left the WH to the parrot,Susan Rice, it read the cause was a video. And Obama, under tough, tough questioning by Letterman (or Lenno?) said it was the video. So we now have confirmed what we knew, that Obama lied. But does anyone care, especially the three million so called conservatives or Reps who stayed home or voted for Gary Johnson and gave this election to O?
It is unraveleing, and O will get his Brand, as the Coverup of BenghaziGate.
I am dealing with Allstate Insurance, at a mailing adress in Kennesaw, Georgia.
KennesawJack| 11.16.12 @ 8:51PM
Don't know where they are here. What's the address?
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 9:24PM
I am a fan of Robert Service for quite a while, but I never read this one before your entry. I feel the heat of many fires, and smell so many brands being heated these days.
CJW| 11.16.12 @ 9:58PM
K Jack
will check adress next week when back in office, but I think it is a PO box.
Have a pleasant weekend.
Joellen| 11.17.12 @ 7:15AM
CJW - I dont know, now the unions took away my Snowballs - Twinkies will be no more - how much more can the American people take?
CJW| 11.17.12 @ 1:17PM
Joellen
Obama's voters would have been more upset with the Twinkies/Hostess closing than with Benghazi if Hostess would have closed before the election.
KennesawJack| 11.16.12 @ 9:37PM
Perhaps the "Cremation of Sam MaGee " is in the offing. Metaphorically, of course.
KennesawJack| 11.16.12 @ 9:39PM
Above was in reply to Al.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:03PM
KJ;
You're reading my mind, though I have to confess, as a Johnny Horton fan, I've preferred the musical version (this is mighty like the South).
KennesawJack| 11.16.12 @ 10:15PM
Hah!
Warrior| 11.16.12 @ 9:55PM
A scene from the White House played by the cast of the old TV show, Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp. I know TLP is blowing the dog whistle again, but it's a great visual effect and notice the names have been changed so you can refer to any past resident.
President Odumbo went to his doctor's office to get a sperm count. The doctor gave him a specimen cup with a safety lid and said, "Take this home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow." Next day, Odumbo reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the cup, which was as clean and empty. The doctor asked what happened and Odumbo explained: "Listen, I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand and still nothing. Moonshell came in to help. She tried with her right hand, then her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, and still nothing. My daughters Malaria and Sasquatch made several attempts. We even called in Valentine Jihadrett, Erik Hostess, Gunner Axlrose, Crazy Uncle MoJoe and my teleprompter, they tried both hands, then an armpit and Plugs even tried squeezin' it between his knees, but still nothing." The doctor was shocked! "You really had all those people help?" Odumbo replied, "Listen, no matter what we tried, we still couldn't get the damn cup open."
The second chapter has the cup conspiracy gets blamed on a racist non-union manufacturer, Bush, tsumami's, the Arab Spring, ATM's, Sandy, Joe the Plumber and a delicate young man from a bath house.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:07PM
Warrior, you've just filled in a half season for a replacement series on the WB network starting in January.
TLP| 11.17.12 @ 11:02AM
Lancelot Link.
Wow!
You're the smartest I know.
I mean that.
mike 3/505| 11.17.12 @ 11:46AM
Mata Hari was HOT!
Lance Link whatchya gonna do when mad Dr Strangemind comes after you?
Oldefarte| 11.16.12 @ 10:33PM
I'm hopeful that eventually this 11/6/12 catastrophe will turn out to reflect the old movie JUDGMENT AT NURENBERG, which resulted in the court conviction of the prosecuted Nazi war generals/criminals in Germany after WWII. Thinking of Benghazi, I'm reminded a scene in this movie of a conversation between Marlene Dietrich [a German non-Jewish woman discussing her fellow German citizens attitudes concerning their witnessing of Germany's Jews being hauled away by SS troops to concentration camps] and Spenser Tracy [the American judge sent to Nurenberg to preside over the trial]. She exclaims that V [WE] JUST DIDN'T KNOW...... V JUST DIDN'T KNOW! Somehow that reminds me of Susan Rice reflection upon her five TV appearances trying to explain her provided talking points concerning 9/11/12!!!!!
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:41PM
I just watched that movie again a week or so ago. It has been written that Ms. Dietrich hated that scene, because she believed that many of her former fellow German countrymen did know.
Like the songbird who once sang so sweetly (wie einst Lili Marlene), I believe you are correct as to who knew, and lied anyway.
Oldefarte| 11.23.12 @ 2:55PM
Yes AC, I'm [and obviously others as well, are certain that the German people did know. How could they have not known, when the SS etc were dragging the Jews away to their slaughter. Of course they knew and they turned their collective blind eyes to same. I think the Nurenberg's movie-point was directive to that obvious fact. They knew, as did the Catholic Church, the USA [before entering the war], etc and THEY DID NOTHING! Like with everything else, if one knows of an immorality and says or attempts to intervene in some way, they are just as guilty as are the perpetrators of the act of immorality!!!!!
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.16.12 @ 10:35PM
I watched the end of "The Sands of Iwo Jima" tonight. After Sgt. Stryker gets killed (the election), there is a moment or two of proper reflection followed by a promise to finish his letter home. Conway then announces " All right. Saddle up. It's time to get back in the war".
The surviving Marines move off into the smoke to continue the battle.
I don't think anything else is needed to complete this entry.
Joellen| 11.17.12 @ 7:23AM
Albert - Sands of Iwo Jima, another favorite of mine. Although Striker was tough on Pvt Conway(?), of course it was for his own good. Conway represents the new America, punk who knows it all. But in the end, When Striker dies, Conway, who reads that last letter to his son (weep now) gets it - if only America can finally get it. Love that movie - love all John Wayne movies.
Joellen| 11.17.12 @ 8:28AM
And that's just the workers I'm referring to.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.17.12 @ 10:27AM
My next entry will switch from classic film to classic TV. I am reminded of the classic Twilight Zone episode “The Howling Man”. A man is relating the tale of his travels through Europe between the wars. He is caught abroad in a bad storm, and is given shelter and refuge in an ancient monastery. While he is recovering, he hears a mournful and ungodly howling emanating from one of the other rooms. He investigates, and learns that it is coming from a man who tells him that the monks are holding him against his will.
The traveler speaks to the head monk, Brother Jerome, who confirms part of the prisoner’s story, but advises that he is not holding a man, but the Devil himself. He explains how while evil is always present wherever people are, when Satan is free to roam in the world trouble multiplies. Brother Jerome explains how he has tracked down and finally imprisoned the Father of All Lies, and how he must remain in their custody if there is to be any hope for the world.
The prisoner convinces the traveler that the monks are insane, and the traveler removes the Staff of Truth which bolts closed the cell door. The prisoner is free, and as he begins to exit, he transforms from a man to the horned and hooved Prince of Darkness.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.17.12 @ 10:28AM
World War II follows, and then the Cold War, Korea etc. The episode is now the contemporary era (it was the early 1960s), and now the older and wiser traveler has tracked down and imprisoned the Devil again. He tells his tale, but as the episode comes to an end, it is apparent that Satan is about to convince a new unwitting subject to help him escape.
The modern update to my entry is that now the Devil has a teleprompter to help fool those who assist him, and is aided by the promise of free stuff.
John II| 11.17.12 @ 10:33AM
Not in the mood, I reckon. The only entry I can manage just now is from THE PRODUCERS (the superior 1968 version), to the tune of "Springtime for Hitler":
Chorus of nervously exuberant Obama precinct workers:
America was having trouble:
A culture eased into the sewer
And then a nasty housing bubble.
So we looked for someone newer.
Where, oh where was he?
Where could that man be?
We looked around and then we found
The man for you and me.
Where, oh where was he?
Where could that man be?
We looked around and then we found
The perfectly worst political clown!
And now it's . . .
Springtime for Bammy and all the Left!
Winter for ev'ry-one else!
We're rolling all the way down now
To the bottom of the pit--
Yes, this is it!
Look out, here comes the big tax hike
Just the kind we like:
Watch out, you slobs--
Your votes will soon kill your jobs . . .
Because . . . it's . . . now . . .
Springtime for Bammy and all the Left!
Winter for ev'ry-one else!
Watch out, World!
We're goin' on tour with
Springtime for Bammy and all the Left!
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.17.12 @ 10:57AM
I saw a part of this on TV the other night around 3am. I concur that it was the superior version. I think your update to the lyrics provides excellent historical context, and now that you’ve brought it up, that Mel Brooks had totalitarian dictators mouthing hippy dialogue (“Hey Baby, Heil Baby”) may prove that he was much more prophetic about what the future held in store than anyone realized.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.17.12 @ 11:09AM
and might I throw in a few suggestions for the solos:
"I was born in Dusseldorf
I came here now I get free stuff"
"All our futures now on loan
Come and get Obamaphone"
John II| 11.17.12 @ 11:30AM
Sounds good. But I only had enough energy to do a short version. Been scrambling lately to batten down the hatches before January One. The day after the election I pulled all my retirement savings out of the stock market. I'm getting too old to be interested in what the Chinese ruefully call "interesting times."
Pecos Pete| 11.17.12 @ 5:51PM
John, I've invested in bottles of booze. Should be good for bartering. Otherwise, I'll be real happy.
BL in AK| 11.17.12 @ 2:09PM
Before I get to my entry, I just want to add my 2 cents to the post-election doldrums and Petreus et al. Like many of the TAS gang the timing of the Petreus fling outing is undoubtedly troubling by taking the attention away from the Benghazi attack. So typical of the MSM propaganda machine. With regards to the next 4 years, I tend to agree with TLP on the approach, let the Demorats go down with their captain on a sinking ship, us conservatives who realize whats coming have our own "Preparatory" lifeboats secured to survive the mess thats inevitable. The hype of the fiscal cliff is just another MSM trick away from the Benghazi attack investigation. Taxes will be raised and little to no spending cuts which both imply more balance sheet expansion by Helicopter Ben.
BL in AK| 11.17.12 @ 2:33PM
And just a bit of perspective from a northern outpost. Here in AK R's took over the State legislature and locally in Anchorage a few long-time dems got booted. The reactions to both from dems in a local alternative weekly rag offer a look into the enemy so to speak. For one Dem opinion the answer to the R takeover here is for them to keep moving to the right, or figure out who they are and win votes that way. Another Dem opinion on the POTUS outcome on what R's should do is so typically based on racism stating a whole column on the fact that "America isn't getting any whiter" and less and less angry white men within the population. Of course the opinion speaks of the establishment R's and not conservative values. So typical. The opinion offers Rs should be more tolerant to the racial diversity of the country and get more informed and more self aware to what the new majority prefers. Another our way or the highway scenario. My take is OK, if angry white men are becoming an endangered species shouldn't the EPA list us with the polar bears, beluga whales et al to bring back our numbers? Just sayin' but don't hold your breath folks!
BL in AK| 11.17.12 @ 2:56PM
TLP our honorable contest MC-
My entry is the 2007 release of "The Shooter" starring Mark Wahlberg as Force Recon Scout Sniper USMC Gunnery Sgt Bob Lee Swagger (Patriots for the analogy), Danny Glover as Colonel Isaac Johnson (BHO), Michael Pena as FBI agent Nick Memphis (Gen. Petraeus), and Ned Beatty as corrupt Senator Charles Meachum (Hillary). Col Johnson appeals to the Gunny to help track down an assassin who plans an assassination attempt on the president. Col Johnson's rogue agents (Susan Rice) eventually frame Sgt Swagger during the course of his recon of three potential sites of a long-range assassination attempt. Upon the Gunny's recon of the three cities where the assassination attempt on the president is supposed to occur, an Ethiopian archbishop (Ambassador Stevens) standing next to the president is assassinated instead and the Gunny gets framed for it and must clear himself. He reaches out to his late spotter's widow Sarah Fenn played by Kate Mara (analogy wise is Lady Liberty).
BL in AK| 11.17.12 @ 3:15PM
Gunny and the FBI agent team up to find out what really went down. They discover that the Ethiopian archbishop (Ambassador Stevens) was assassinated because he was going to speak out about a covert operation that massacred an Eritrean village to allow a pipeline through the area, an operation that was facillitated by the corrupt senator (Hillary). Analogy-wise the massacre of the African village is the Benghazi cover-up, that we are now learning of: combo of guns to Syrian rebels and/or a CIA prison for Al Queda goons. The opening of the movie has the Gunny and his late spotter providing cover for the extraction of that covert op force. Gunny gets the evidence on tape from an ex-sniper (Axelrod) allied with Colonel J0hnson (BHO) prior to his suicide.
BL in AK| 11.17.12 @ 3:32PM
In order to rescue Sarah (Lady Liberty) who was kidnapped to lure the Gunny and the FBI agent out, they arrange a swap on a remote mountaintop with BHO and Hillary to give up the taped evidence. Gunny and FBI agent surrender to the FBI who swoop down on the remote meeting place. The Gunny and FBI agent are eventually exonerated after the Gunny shows the Attorney General that the weapon that supposedly fired the shot that killed the Ethiopian archbishop didn't have a proper firing pin. The AG tells the Gunny they can't prosecute the Col (BHO) because the massacre occurred outside American legal jurisdiction and he walks free. The AG then suggests an alternative to the Gunny for justice. The movie ends with the Gunny eliminating the corrupt senator and Col and then blows up the senators vacation house. The last scene has the Gunny (Patriots) and Sarah (Lady Liberty) driving away.
BL in AK| 11.17.12 @ 3:35PM
A bit long-winded but hope the judges and contest pundits will give some leeway. Gotta go stack some firewood before it starts snowing again.
cheerz
BL
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.17.12 @ 6:22PM
BL;
Good film from a good series of books.
Current events show that we can still depend on Alaskans to make good choices about government, even if too many of us here in the lower 48 fail in that regard.
BL in AK| 11.17.12 @ 8:12PM
Albert-
I didn't read the novel the movie was based on but the plot seemed to fit our current events. And to clarify for all, I do not advocate a violent answer to our current predicament, that is just how the movie potrayed the novel. The movie plot seemed to fit the Benghazi cover-up very well IMO with the Africa scenario. I think we all understand it is going to be a rough 4 years ahead of us.
Here in AK hopefully the changes will be for the better to help get the TransAK pipeline back up to full capacity and especially if Shell discovers a large deposit in the Chukchi or Beaufort OCS next year. They learned alot about arctic off-shore exploration this season.
cheerz
BL
TLP| 11.17.12 @ 9:24PM
I'm sorry about tonight. I had a Family Emergency, and I've been out all afternoon.
Everything is okay. It was pretty much a False Alarm, but it has taken up the whole day, as you can see, by the time of this Post.
When I get up at 6am Tomorrow? I'll have time to go over all of the Entries, and hand out the Prizes to those who have Earned Them.
Again: I apologize, but there was nothing I could do.
Pecos Pete| 11.18.12 @ 6:01AM
Apology not necessary. I hope all ends well.
Hardcard| 11.18.12 @ 8:15AM
Well did I win? Do I get all the free prize stuff ?
Did I? When do you deliver all my stuff (free shipping and handling) ? The BMW is my choice no domestic crap (red). Where do we sail from? FYI...I'm allergic to beluga cavier.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 8:33AM
That was unbelievable.
Even though some of our friends did not join us this week (some people have this Crazy Notion that Birthdays and Weddings and Christenings, and Sporting Events,mand what have you, somehow superceed The Greatest Contest in the PLAnet.
The Mysterious Mr. Kwan is mysteriously unaccounted for. As is Nick, Johnnie Navritil, and the Smoking Hot - Stephie. Let's hope that they're well, and that we'll see them again, next time around.
The Winners of the Autographed Copies of David Petraeous' Little Black Book are as follows:
Albert Constantine Jr. For his Hypnotic recollection of the Movie - "The Doors". Although he insists that this is not an Entry. I beg to differ. I think it was one of the best. PROPHESY takes time, and is rarely splashed across the Front Pages. It is always Hidden in plain sight, in between the lines. In the Haunting Lyrics of a drug addled Madman's SONG.
Everything in Revelation is coming to pass, if you can identify the things that are Not out in the Open, but lurking on the periphery, waiting for the last shoe to drop.
Think: I Robot. There are BREAD CRUMBS all around us, and it's up to us to Recognize them before Candy Crowley sees them, and stuffs them all in her Mouth.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 8:55AM
Next - At the risk of turning The TLP Show, into The Albert Constentine Jr. Show, I would also like to award Albert for his "Howling Man" analogy. One of my all time Favourite Episode, and so Relevent to what just happened.
The only thing that I would change is The Staff represents everything that is Common Knowledge about the Creature inside the Oval Office. And, the unsuspecting traveler who happens bye, are the 30 Million Whites who stayed home. - The 70% of Jews who Voted for their Upcoming World Wide Decimation at the hands of everyone that Their "Choice" on November 6, has ever BOWED to. - And, of course: The 39% of White Voters who (because of some Genetic Deficiency they picked up somewhere along the line) can't seem to take: "I hate you MFing Honky, Cracker, Blue Eyed, MFing WHITE DEVILS" for an answer.
As AJC has already Won a First Prize, I am sending him an Autographed Home Version of My Little Black Book, which is Crammed with Numbers, if he should ever get lonely.
They're all easy to Dial, and they're only $1 for the first three minutes, and $2 a minute for every minute after that.
Hardcard| 11.18.12 @ 9:25AM
Wow !!!! What a gip !!! I guess the cruise is off?
Warrior| 11.18.12 @ 9:43AM
I feel like Allen West. I will be posting Lancelot Link references every week until TLP comes to his senses.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mCwOnq2C2vA
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 9:32AM
Believe it or not, Hardcard, you are getting a Winner's share. One Autographed David Petraeous Little Black Book. (as I am sure that you already are in possession of My little Black Book and a Killer Phone Bill, as well) for your Infinitesimal (that means: Really Tiny) contribution, in your truly One Sided Collaboration with Joellen, with the Entry of: Abbott and Costello meet the Wolfman.
If you had never, ever so meekly, scribbled down - "abbott and costello meet the wolfman?" Joellen might never had latched on to that Movie, and dragged you over the Finish Line like The Old Aunt's dog, leashed to the back bumper of Clark Griswald's Family Truckster.
I don't see any of those things you've requested, on our Prize List. However, I am sending you a Case of stuff that Smells exactly like Beluga Caviar, and some say, Tastes just like it as well. And, don't let all of the Cat Pictures on the cans, fool ya. It's just a Logo. Like the Gecko at Geico.
Bon Appetite, Mr. Winner.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 9:45AM
Joellen. For your part in the whole Abbott and Costello deal (which resembled the percentage o Votes that The Magic Negroe received from all of the Unmagic Negroes in Philthydelphia) I'm sending you Both Autographed Little Black Books, as well as an actual Photograph of me, caught in the Act of Listening to one of my girlfriends talking to me, for only $2 a Minute.
It's practically a Hallmark Moment.
(This photograph is recommended for Adults, and by no means should anyone under the age of Consent be allowed to view this picture. No Animals were hurt, in the making of this picture)
I'm obligated, by Law, to add that disclaimer whenever I mail out one of these pictures.
I think they call it: Anthony Weiners Law.
Joellen| 11.18.12 @ 1:07PM
Thanks Tim, as always I am honored that you keep me in the loop. However, may I please ask you to reconsider your precious unmentionable gifts and replace them with "last of the Hostessess Snowballs". GOD willing you'll be around for awhile, with more family appropriate pictures to be awarded, but try finding snowballs now - it's like trying to find a 64 ounce soda in NYC or a liberal who's tolerant of one's personal beliefs or choices. Thanks brother, see you tomorrow.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 4:04PM
Or a Vote for Mitt Romney in Philly.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 9:51AM
Mr. "Hurry up! I gotta pee!" Warrior gets a Big Prize for the Strangest Entry I could ever have Imagined.
LANCELOT LINK.
No explanations needed.
It speaks for itself.
(Now, go pee.)
Warrior| 11.18.12 @ 12:23PM
I'm feeling better now. Not because you peed, but because...never mind.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 10:03AM
Pecos Pete, for another Masterpiece in the Field of Poetry, the likes of which we've rarely seen, since the Days of: There once was a Man from Nantucket.
I don't know how he does it.
Does he do it because it's Easy? Or does he do it because - in the words of JFK and Alanthere'snotenoughhaironmyhotdog Brooks - it is Hard?
Even though Albert was remiss, with his usual Snaps? I found this week's installment totally Sponge-worthy.
Give that man a Little Black Book.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 10:07AM
5 minute break.
Imagine nice Christmas Music playing, and a Yule Log Burning on your computer Screens, as I go drop a Stool Log, which will also be eminating Smoke.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.18.12 @ 10:39AM
Now, here's a visual that conjures up comparison to last week's election result.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 10:44AM
Now, just imagine this Visual: Bob Grant's face, when he finds out what's making his Milk Carton feel so heavy and why it smells so bad.
Warrior| 11.18.12 @ 12:24PM
and you call my entries strange...
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 11:14AM
Our young Eskimo friend wins a Prize, not for his choice of that Crappy Movie (It has Danny Glover in it. That makes it VERBOTEN, and a piece a shit) but for putting in to words, the Utter Infallability of all of my Comments, Monday thru Thursday.
I decided (on the toilet) that such devotion to the finer points of Kissing the Ass that feeds you, could not go Unrewarded.
I am sending Nanuk of the North (I'm assuming that that's what BL in AK stands for. Unless it means that he's Black, and goes to Public School) my Black Book, in the hope that he can somehow bounce a Transmission offa the Aurora Borealis, and get a hold of that 300lb Retiree, in Jamaica Queens, posing as little Donna you know You Wanna all night long, that she might prod him into Rubbing Two Things together.
One being his hand.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 11:32AM
I'm sending one of My Little Black Books to KennesawJack, plus $1 to get him started on the Road to Recovery, as I know that he's not been himself, lately.
Also, his Ballad of the Brand, wasn't half bad, as well.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 11:43AM
And, of course, as usual, John II - aka - Bobby Ballerina Shoes - Gives us his Non Gay Poetic Interpretation of an Old Broadway Show from 1968, Sung to the tune of Yet Another Song that nobody knows. Totally Non Gay.
I'm looking at the Judges, who actually are Gay, and they're shaking their heads. Their Big Heads. Not their little ones.
You guys have Sick Minds.
Pecos Pete| 11.18.12 @ 12:02PM
Bien hecho mi amigo. Mi valle es su valle.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 11:58AM
There are No Losers this week, as I have already Paid for that Tree Branch, thank you very much.
So, anyone not among the afore mentioned Elite Group, can expect a Milk Carton with one of a number of Pictures of Ross Kaminsky - Hiding from, Running from, or attempting to Chew through the bamboo reed robes, that his Aboriginal Vacation Hosts have bound Him, and his beautiful Missus with, as they build a Fire under their Big Cooking Pot.
Again: We wish those who couldn't make it this weekend - Good Health and Good Fortune. And we've learned, like Bill Clinton famously remarked: You are never alone, once you realize that there is always someone out there who will listen to your problems, and tell you things that will surely make you feel better.
And, it'll only set you back $1 for the first 3 Minutes, and $2 for each additional Minute.
I gotta go.
I've got somebody on hold.
chuck| 11.18.12 @ 12:44PM
TLP, Oh great One!
Okay enough sucking up. I usually don't complaim about the judging, but in this case I believe you missed the true winners.
The true winners are those of us who DID NOT SUBMIT AN ENTRY. A few weeks ago , Col. Mike stole all of our ideas as his own, so like the residents of Galt's Gulch, after realizing their hard work and production was being stolen by the non-productive, we chose to simply disappear, thus denying everyone the benefit of our contributions.
Like the supercomputer Joshua says in "War Games", "a strange game, the only way to win is not to play."
Let this be a warning to you.......we can take our hard work and disappear, thus denying our services to you.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 4:09PM
I hope this is a joke.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 4:13PM
You do realize, don't you, that The Game is the thing. Not the Imaginary Prizes.
We need you here, on Fridays.
Losing you would be like LBJ losing Cronkite.
I beg all of you, to Reconsider your Imitation of the Three Million White Voters who STAYED HOME on Election Night.
Shame on you!
Shame on you all.
chuck| 11.18.12 @ 8:05PM
Oh Great One, I fear you missed the analogy. After losing the election, it is now open season on the producers. The analogy is the refusal to play the liberals game of us producing, and them stealing it to buy votes. My refusal to enter the contest symbolizes the exit of my production from the GDP, and my refusal to "feed the monkey".
Like the super computer "Joshua" in Wargames says, "the only way to win is not to play". The only way to win when combatting liberalism/socialism, is to refuse to play.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.18.12 @ 12:01PM
This has been another great week at the best analogy contest, coast to coast and around the net. We had a great mix of regulars and newcomers, with a high level of participation. I don’t say this because I took first prize this week; I say it because so many of the other entries show the creativity and awareness of where things stand.
Once again Mr. Pennell has done an excellent job of rallying us all here, and setting the bar high for all who chose to submit an entry. There were early arrivals, and new arrivals. Site regulars made appearances. TLP has noted some of our absent friends; hopefully, no one failed to show up because they remain too discouraged by the election results. Likewise, I hope no one is absent because they were overwhelmed by a flash mob and left brain damaged* in another crime unreported by the media (*the increasing frequency of such events might partially account for last week’s election results, as well as Purp, vtwin, Jack London, et al).
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.18.12 @ 12:02PM
We have music, TV, film and poetry. There was also a bit of literature and body art, with all the talk of a Dragon Tattoo. But most of all, we have our positive outlooks. The results of last week’s election felt like we were General Eisenhower’s assembled force on June 6, 1944 storming ashore at Normandy, only to be repulsed at the Atlantic Wall. Instead of bemoaning our bad fortune, we try to turn it into a memorable day at the beach.
These are dark days, indeed, and there are more dark ones ahead. As we prepare for the bad that is coming and how we hope to survive and reverse it, it is good to have an opportunity to enjoy some lighter moments, and some fellowship. It is good to be able to laugh at ourselves, and more important to enjoy laughs at the expense of those who are trying to destroy this Constitutional republic. Hopefully, as we learn to mock them successfully, so will it follow that we may be successful in defeating them.
Warrior| 11.18.12 @ 12:26PM
Last week elections for true conservatives was like watching the MASH episode where Henry Blake was killed.
CJW| 11.18.12 @ 1:43PM
All the entries were good and interesting.
Following up on Albert's D-Day, I am reading Andrew Roberts' excellent WWII history, "The Storm of War." After the German invasion of the Russia and the numerous German battle victories, Stalin issued his "Not One Step Backward" order to rally the Russians.
While, of course, Stalin is a monster, equal if not worse than Hitler, Mao, Pol Pot, Castro, HoChiMinh, and others and is not to be imitated, the congressional Reps ought to adopt a "Not One Step Backward" policy to oppose every Obama initiative that involves raising tax rates, increasing the size of government, and weakening our defense, as in Benghazi.
They need to take the offense to investigate BengaziGate.
Reid and the Dems are in full coverup mode.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 4:18PM
And, Boehnor and McConnell will be in full CHICKENSHIT MODE.
I'm afraid that you can Count On It.
Hardcard| 11.18.12 @ 2:10PM
Thanks I got a thrill up my leg. Bon Voyage !!!
Bob Grant| 11.18.12 @ 2:29PM
TLP's Traveling Analogy Game, another success. Each week he takes us to far-flung places around the World. From scarcely-read articles about the Middle East by scarcely-read aurthur, to articles about the dark, creepy side of Europe (I mean really,Europe's Sandusky?). One thing's for certain: you always feel the need to take a shower after leaving the game, either to get the Middle Eastern sand out of your a** or simply to remove the sleaze. TLP upped the comments on this G*d-forsaken thread from 8 to 240+. That alone deserves a special prize.
As always, Al provides the prudent mentoring and assistance with the contestants' entrys. His weekly wrap up is worth the visit alone. A nice balance to TLP's Bull-in-a-China Shop approach to the game. Heh:-)
After reading contestants' entries, I get the sense people are still struggling to cope with the disastrous aftermath of November 6th, 2012, so instead of leaving the game with that thought in mind, I prefer to leave with a more upbeat one: Candy Crowley's thong and all that conjures in one's mind. And so I leave you with a ditty that summarizes my feelings....
Bob Grant| 11.18.12 @ 2:30PM
...The bigger the cushion, the sweeter the pushin
That's what I said.
The looser the waistband, the deeper the quicksand
Or so I have read.
My baby fits me like a flesh tuxedo.
I love to sink her with my pink torpedo.
Big bottom
Big bottom
Talk about bum cakes,
My gal's got 'em.
Big bottom,
Drive me out of my mind.
How can I leave this behind?
I saw her on monday, twas my lucky bun day
{ From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/s/.....yrics.html }
You know what I mean.
I love her each weekday, each velvety cheekday
You know what I mean.
My love gun's loaded and she's in my sights
Big game's waiting there inside her tights
Big bottom
Big bottom
Talk about mud flaps
My gal's got 'em.
Big bottom
Drive me out of my mind.
How can I leave this behind?
Bob Grant| 11.18.12 @ 2:56PM
My apologies for several misspellings. I DO know how to spell Author. Really, I do!
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.18.12 @ 3:09PM
BG, the song rates an 11 each time it is played.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 4:24PM
I would send him My Little Black Book, but I have a feeling that he already has it.
Bob Grant| 11.18.12 @ 6:31PM
I browsed it but noticed you've omitted Candy.
Bogarting Candy?
Bob Grant| 11.18.12 @ 6:27PM
Why not just make 10 the highest rating?
Albert Constantine Jr.| 11.18.12 @ 8:05PM
Nigel Tufnel: The numbers all go to eleven. Look, right across the board, eleven, eleven, eleven and...
Marty DiBergi: Oh, I see. And most amps go up to ten?
Nigel Tufnel: Exactly.
Marty DiBergi: Does that mean it's louder? Is it any louder?
Nigel Tufnel: Well, it's one louder, isn't it? It's not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You're on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?
Marty DiBergi: I don't know.
Nigel Tufnel: Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do?
Marty DiBergi: Put it up to eleven.
Nigel Tufnel: Eleven. Exactly. One louder.
Marty DiBergi: Why don't you just make ten louder and make ten be the top number and make that a little louder?
Nigel Tufnel: [pause] These go to eleven
Bob Grant| 11.18.12 @ 9:08PM
"Nigel Tufnel: Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do?
Marty DiBergi: Put it up to eleven...
I suppose obama is the Nigel Tufnel of presidents, and he's cranking our economy up to eleven?
BL in AK| 11.18.12 @ 2:45PM
TLP-
Wow! I'll be damn! 4 cryin' out loud. I thought having Danny Glover being BHO would be a no brainer. Gonna have to enjoy a strong Belgian beer to celebrate. Since I only post on weekends during the Best Contest on the Planet (this is the last kissing a** you get out of me TLP) it provides an opportunity to give my 2 cents about the weeks worth of postings by the TAS gang. Thanks again Tim for extending the contests. Hopefully future contests will lure more of the gang in time, and I am really glad I was wrong about OT's going AWOL. It would be interesting to see one of Frank "I place the subject of my posts between my name" Drackman entries, or of VMJrs financial wizardry entries as we near the tipping point of SHTF. And it was great to see Oldefarte decompress a bit to provide an entry. He has been posting all of our frustration rather pointedly over the last ten days. I have been called alot of things so I will just add Nanuck of the North to the list.
Have a safe Thanksgiving short work week all.
cheerz
Bill L.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 4:22PM
I'm drinking a Belgian Beer, as we speak.
Look for your shirts, this week.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 4:26PM
"It was nice to see Oldefarte decompress."
You got that right.
Bob Grant| 11.18.12 @ 6:37PM
I agree, it was nice to see Oldefarte decompress, however, his lack of large caps and exclamation points was a little unsettling.
TLP| 11.18.12 @ 8:00PM
My advice to you is this: When you get your Milk Carton?
Use Rubber Gloves, and don't open it up and Smell it.
I really don't know how to thank you for being one of the guys that make this Contest work.
Like with Albert? I couldn't do it, without you.
Are you a Vet?
See ya, tomorrow.
Sweet dreams.
Oldefarte| 11.23.12 @ 3:17PM
BG & TLP: After 11/6/12, the home has refused to unlock the chains and take off the straight jacket. I'm yelling "I'M BACK" constantly now while looking cross-eyed through the axed-door, while lightening bolts or reguritation are shooting out of my AH. Have no fear, as I have a death grip on my autographed framed copy of DWS' Playboy nude foldout!!!!!!!!! [sorry for the "large caps and exclamation points" but it's either that or sputter baloon-wise exhaling inclosed air northward]
Oldefarte| 11.23.12 @ 3:20PM
Opps, too many "e's" and not enough "n's"
BL in AK| 11.18.12 @ 10:24PM
TLP-
Glad to see your "tolerant" about your beer choices. I will look for the shirts this week. Thanks in advance. This next week should be a slow one for the trolls. It seems a few new ones have came out of the woodwork post-election. Albert always seems to provide the counter-punch consistently.
Maybe Cowgirl, Stephie, Nancy in NC and Loulou will join the contest next time.
cheerz
BL