The American Spectator : Scary Porches, Scarier Doctors

Text Size

At Large

Scary Porches, Scarier Doctors

By Ralph R. Reiland on 11.18.09 @ 6:05AM

New from the world of universal health care.

In news from the world of universal health care, Mark Wattson, 35, collapsed in pain in the street in Swindon, England, a month after he had his appendix removed.

He was rushed by ambulance to Great Western Hospital, the place where his appendectomy was done and where doctors had released him after assurances that all went well.

This time, Mr. Wattson was told by the same team of doctors that his supposedly removed appendix had burst and that he needed to be readmitted for an emergency appendectomy.

"I couldn't believe what I was hearing," said Wattson. "I told these people I had my appendix out just four weeks earlier but there it was on the screen for all to see. I thought: 'What the hell did they slice me open for in the first place'?"

More trouble developed after Wattson's second operation. The incision made during the operation became infected, leaving a hole in his stomach, 1.6 inches deep by 1.2 inches wide. Treatment required an additional six days in the hospital.

While bouncing back and forth to the hospital, Wattson lost his part-time job at a sports shop. "I had a temporary job, but when I took in two medical certificates saying I had my appendix out twice they didn't believe me."

So now he's jobless -- and still in pain. And wondering what the surgeons removed the first time. "Now I'm helpless. I can't go out and find a job, I can't go to interviews. I can barely walk and am in constant pain."

In other universal health care news, the December 2009 issue of Reason magazine reports that government inspectors working for the Stoke City Council in England "warned residents to remove welcome mats and potted plants from their porches."

With government running health care, it becomes the state's business if someone trips over a porch plant or welcome mat, or if some numbskull runs into a hanging basket.

And what about sled riding, something more likely than a potted palm to raise hospital costs?

In a nation that can't stomach the risk of a welcome mat, how long will people be permitted to ice skate or race cars? Will kids still be allowed to build snowmen, given the danger of frostbite and subsequent medical interventions?

So what will be the allowable winter sport in England, given the need to cut the level of red ink in health budgets? Stay inside and bake gingerbread people? Still risky. To make 30 little gingerpeople, just 2.5 inches tall, Betty Crocker says to use a full cup of packed brown sugar, 1.5 cups of dark molasses, 7 cups of flour, and 1/3 cup of shortening, plus cinnamon, allspice, cloves and ginger.

There's also frosting -- 4 more cups of sugar, powdered, plus vanilla and some raisins and chocolate chips for the faces and buttons.

That comes to 270 calories per gingerperson. Eat the whole batch (they're small) and that's 8,100 calories, enough to become the business of the obesity cops and the central committee's watchers of budget busters in the health sector.

On top of fat, there's also the gingerperson's fuel squandering and its link to climate calamities and drowning polar bears, with ginger, cloves and cinnamon, respectively, coming from half a warming world away in India, Madagascar and Sri Lanka.

I think we're all going to end up in nerdmobiles with broccoli sandwiches, boring porches, lousy doctors and double appendectomies.

About the Author

Ralph R. Reiland is the B. Kenneth Simon professor of free enterprise and an associate professor of economics at Robert Morris University in Pittsburgh.

Letter to the Editor View all comments (12) | Leave a comment

Al Adab| 11.18.09 @ 10:22AM

My Doctor currently refuses to acdwept medicare for payment. We have to contract with him on our private insurance. What will he do with Govt. option, quit. Now that helps us all doesn't it?

Al Adab| 11.18.09 @ 10:24AM

SP: accept.

Boy I need to learn spell check. Sorry gang.

KyMouse| 11.18.09 @ 12:39PM

Good points, Al. No apology necessary.

Dixie Pixie| 11.18.09 @ 11:35AM

Welcome to the world of the future. No flying cars but we have a bureaucratic commission for every aspect of your life.

Don't walk on the grass.

David Govett| 11.18.09 @ 12:24PM

Were Obama's health care plan to be implemented, tens of thousands of additional doctors would be required. Good news for tens of thousands of C-minus premed students, bad news for their future patients.

Santino49| 11.18.09 @ 1:03PM

These are the people who stood alone against the Nazis?

Big Leo| 11.18.09 @ 2:18PM

My ophthalmologist does not accept Medicare and Medicaid. He is more than willing to limit himself to private insurance and cash customers. How long will he be allowed to do so under Obamacare?

Tim| 11.18.09 @ 3:02PM

"In Dorset, England, a car crashed into Bethany Dibbs, 9, as she was riding her scooter, fracturing her skull. The first paramedics on the scene called for backup, but dispatch told them they could not send the nearest crew because they were on a mandated break. They would have to wait 20 minutes. Those paramedics then called their colleagues directly, and they abandoned their break to come help. "

"Brian Bendle was standing in shallow water when a jet ski smacked into him at England's Middlemoor Water Park. He suffered a broken back and ribs and a punctured lung. But when paramedics arrived at the scene, they refused to enter the six-inch deep water to help him out. They said health and safety rules demanded that a fire crew remove him from the water. "

http://reason.com/brickbat

Jim O'Brien| 11.18.09 @ 3:39PM

Government control of anything results in low quality, poor accountability, higher cost, bad service, incompetence, shortages, rationing, and utter contempt for the public (the "customer"), who of course no longer has a choice. While liberals complain about private monopolies (also a bad idea), they want to give the government a monopoly over our health care.

Mar| 11.20.09 @ 5:08PM

Suppressed Medical Records (File 5100-13465/001)

St. Catharines, Ontario

- Privacy Commissioner of Canada (Sect. 25,26,28)

- C.M.H.A / C.A.M.H. - Brock University

Further details Google:

Medicine_Gone_Bad

http://medicine-gone-bad.blogspot.com/

lay123| 4.4.10 @ 1:15AM

You won't have to worry about having your sunglass merchandise to gather dust on its display racks waiting for the summer season to commence www.sunglass-mall.com

poptropica | 4.9.10 @ 10:46PM

I’ll have a Poptropica full written walkthrough very soon, but in the meantime, here are some answers to some of the frequently asked questions about Mythology Island. Having trouble? Post a question in the comments and I’ll try to answer it!
Getting Hercules to Help You

Hercules won’t help you until you have all five items from Zeus’ quest. Once you have the five items, bring them to Athena. Zeus will appear and steal them. The big jerk! Once this happens, talk to Athena and she will tell you that Hercules will help you. You’ll need to have the magic mirror from Aphrodite because Hercules doesn’t want to have to walk. He’s so lazy!
Getting the Hydra Scale

You can see how to do this in the videos, but basically you need to jump up when the Hydra is about to strike. He will rear one of his heads back to attack and his eyes will bulge out. When this happens, jump up in the air and then try to land on top of his head. That head will get knocked out. When all five heads get knocked out, the Hydra will be asleep and you can click on him to get one of the scales. I’ll have a full written walkthrough very soon, but in the meantime, here are some answers to some of the frequently asked questions about Mythology Island. Having trouble? Post a question in the comments and I’ll try to answer it!
Getting Hercules to Help You

Poptropica You can see how to do this in the videos, but basically you need