The notorious No.6 died this past February, and this has made for a quiet autumn rutting season nearly concluded among the elk (C. Canadensis nelsoni) on Yellowstone's northern range. The late bull has been described in the local media as the "Elvis of elk." He was quite popular with the girls, er, cows. "It was certainly eerily calm this fall compared to when No.6 was around," Yellowstone elk biologist P.J. White told AP. When found last winter, it seems No.6 had attempted to jump over a barbed wire fence on a ranch just north of the Park, got tripped-up, and ended up on his back with his great antlers underneath him, and suffocated while trapped between two boulders. He was approximately fifteen years old (some elk live to be twenty, so he was on the cusp of old age) and weighed 725 pounds (average mature bull -- 700). No.6 got his numerical moniker because he was studied and eartagged by wildlife biologists a few years ago as he was maturing to be the dominant bull in the area around Mammoth Hot Springs, the administrative headquarters of Yellowstone National Park.
No.6 had a long tenure as King of the Bull Elk. In his heyday during the annual fall rut he was attended by a large harem of cow elk (approximately 25), and his instinctual possession of them made him the jealous type, normal for the species. Every year, No. 6 jousted with up-and-coming bulls by the common ungulate modus operandi of locking horns in a pushing and shaking struggle, and he always prevailed. When bulls engage in these contests, the level of testosterone-fueled aggression is extreme. Hence the Darwinian theory of survival-of-the-fittest plays out. The dominant bull breeds with many cows over a period of weeks (as he attracts the harem by high pitched "bugling"), and is responsible for the births of many healthy calves in the late spring. Thus the gene pool is strengthened. But No. 6 took his paternal-pugilistic instincts a bit too seriously.
Something in his walnut-sized brain couldn't come to terms with certain aspects of life in the modern world. Nothing in millions of years of elk evolution had prepared No. 6 to understand the essence of a motor vehicle. Cars have been cruising through Yellowstone for almost a century, rolling past mostly unimpressed wildlife, especially the bison that habitually stand in the middle of roads serenely eyeing the traffic jams they initiate. Although No. 6 wasn't the first elk on record ever to do it, he excelled at an activity that only enhanced his legend. During the rut he routinely terrified tourists by attacking their cars.
He stood by the road or in it near Mammoth and watched vehicles slow down and crawl by him. Sometimes visitors stopped for a photo op, occasionally annoying him. He seemed to zero in on SUVs, as if the bigger the automobile, the more of a threat it was to him and Yellowstone's future elk gene pool. No. 6 took them head on, his favorite approach was lowering his massive horns and charging straight at the front grill and headlights. He punctured radiators as if he knew that doing so would disable the vehicle. He caused thousands of dollars worth of insurance claims to be filed. He attacked two men in separate incidents; knocking down one man, and causing another to need stitches. It got so bad in his prime that Yellowstone elk biologists tranquillized him twice -- in 2004 and 2005 -- and cropped his antlers to make them less dangerous. Bulls shed their antlers in early winter and grow new ones (initially in "velvet") the following summer, so for every rut they sport new horns.
According to AP, No. 6's dressed carcass is in possession of the woman who owns the ranch near Gardiner, Montana, where he died. The Rocky Mountain Elk Foundation is offering the services of a taxidermist to do a head and shoulder mount, as it seeks permission to display No. 6's regal head at its headquarters in Missoula. So if all goes well, No.6 will attain the sort of elk immortality that would have suited his bull elk ego.
After the usual genetic head-butting among surviving bulls this fall, another dominant one has emerged in the Mammoth Hot Springs area. The Yellowstone wildlife pointyheads have identified him as the previously tagged No.10. As far as anyone knows, No. 10 -- though an impressive bull -- has never attacked a motor vehicle.
No. 10, I knew No.6. No. 6 was a friend of mine. And you, sir, are no No. 6.
Kitty| 11.12.09 @ 6:39AM
Elvis has left the park. :(
...
Hardius| 11.12.09 @ 7:37AM
Thank-You, Thank-You very much. Is #10 an offspring of #6?
Dave Williams| 11.12.09 @ 10:21AM
Nice rack.
Kitty| 11.12.09 @ 2:48PM
OMG! HA HA HA !!!
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Ned| 11.12.09 @ 10:27AM
"Nothing in millions of years of elk evolution had prepared No. 6 to understand the essence of a motor vehicle."
But that is where you are wrong. This noble creature had an intrinsic understanding of the present unnatural undoing of nature unfolding before our eyes, the warming of the planet.
He, old No. 6, reaching an age of wisdom simply understood the SUV, which represents American consumerism at its worst, to be the root cause of the impending destruction of ours and his world. He, in his only available way, impaled the radiators of the polluters, disabling them, and for a time stopping their evil deeds in an attempt to save the world.
I didn't know No 6, but I have known of other great "Warmer" crusaders. We must all ask ourselves, is it a coincidence that the spiritual leader of the “Warmers” is named Al Gore, gore being defined as (wound with horns)? I think not.
Is it a coincidence that he died of suffocation? Or was this one final desperate effort to, at least, stop his own carbon emissions? I think so.
We will never know, but I, for one, believe No 6 was not just an elk with a pretty voice calling for his mates, but rather a bugling harbinger of a death warning for us all, and a martyr who laid down his life on the green alter of sacrifice.
Margie| 11.12.09 @ 2:29PM
I just knew Algore was behind this. He's got them Elk trained. It's a conspiracy.
Doctor Right| 11.12.09 @ 10:30AM
"Something in his walnut-sized brain couldn't come to terms with certain aspects of life in the modern world."
Are we talking about Elk, or the current Democrat leadership..?
10am| 11.12.09 @ 11:00AM
Anyone know what he scored?
Al Adab| 11.12.09 @ 1:30PM
Ask Boone and Crockett. Founded BTW by Theodore Roosevelt.
Tom| 11.12.09 @ 11:06AM
Ned,
Have you noticed that the world is cooling over the past 10 years or does your walnut-sized brain blindly encourage you to help make Al Gore richer?
Ned| 11.12.09 @ 12:11PM
Tom,
Either I am getting very good at playing the part of a Warmer, or you suffer from an immunity to sarcasm.
Like the Gust character said in the movie "Charlie Wilson’s War", "hey there’s no reason we can't make this fun."
Otis, my man| 11.12.09 @ 4:07PM
Ned,
Tom must have a Liberal's sense of humor...
John II| 11.14.09 @ 11:33AM
Confucius nonetheless say, "Imperviousness to irony sign of good heart if not of quick wit."
Pingback| 11.12.09 @ 11:12AM
Insurance Life Term - The King - Spectator.org « Insurance Life Term links to this page. Here’s an excerpt:
Curtis Rasmussen| 11.12.09 @ 11:22AM
Elk: Who is number one?
Ranger: You are number 6.
Al Adab| 11.12.09 @ 11:29AM
Truely he was a Prisoner, whether he knew it or not.
Nootcheez| 11.12.09 @ 12:50PM
Brilliant.
Tim| 11.12.09 @ 2:46PM
He was the Ted Kennedy of Elk.
Bob K.| 11.12.09 @ 6:50PM
Did he drown a young cow elk?
George| 11.12.09 @ 7:53PM
Horns are horns and antlers are different. Imagine a Boone and Crockett set of antlers like Elvis #6's crashing to the ground and no one around to hear it. However, being gored by AlGore is the very worst way to die or live.
kerry| 11.15.09 @ 2:10PM
Is that no.6 in the pic? If so he looks bad to the bone. Fearless. The real deal.
You know. Kinda like Sarah.
What is B.O.? oh yeah, numero zero.