Bernie Sanders

Sanders May Have Won Michigan, But Clinton Won The Delegates

By on 3.9.16 | 1:45PM

Bernie Sanders pulled off what can only be considered an "epic" win last night in Michigan, defying all predictions and polling. Michigan, my home state, was, against all reason and logic, feeling the Bern

But while Bernie was cracking the champagne to celebrate his victory, Hillary Clinton was the one riding off into the sunset with the majority of delegates. Because, yet again, Michigan's Democratic party has a wealth of superdelegates, and Hillary Clinton managed to snag quite a few for herself

Clinton cleaned up in Mississippi, winning 83 percent of the vote, according to The Associated Press. Sanders on the other hand, finished with just 16 percent, 1 point above the threshold to win delegates. That gave Clinton an estimated 28 delegates, compared to just one for Sanders by the AP's count, with seven more unaccounted for at midnight. 

Bernie Sanders: White People Don’t Know What It’s Like to Be Poor

By on 3.7.16 | 12:37PM

Last night's Democratic debate, held in Flint, Michigan for maximum pandering power, was full of choice nuggets.

Bernie Sanders sexistly hushed Hillary Clinton as she tried to interrupt his ranting. MSNBC was caught giving Hillary's spokeswoman the interview questions ahead of time. Bernie Sanders blamed Flint's water crisis on corporations instead of the 60 years of Democratic rule that allowed the city's pipes to turn to rusty mush so that the drinking water would be filled with lead as soon as they came to rely on local water sources. Hillary Clinton called on Michigan governor Rick Snyder to resign because obviously, a Republican governor is completely at fault for whatever Democrats have spent the last six decades ruining. 

Thousands of Bernie Sanders Contributions Are Illegal, Says FEC

By on 3.7.16 | 11:46AM

Not that I'm a fan of traumatizing The American Spectator's readers, but the Bernie Sanders love has gotten so great over the last few weeks, as the candidate has irretrivably declined in the polls, that the Bernie Sanders products, available for Internet purchase, have achieved an all-time low. It seems that Bernie Sanders love has moved from the purely policy oriented, into the downright creepy; you can now purchase — for the low, low price of $8.10 (it's not free, sorry) — a "Buff Bernie" coloring book, featuring page after page of shirtless Bernie Sanders in provocative poses.

But while Bernie Sanders shower fantasies might be at an all-time high, the candidate's appeal seems to be weakening. Millennials with no concept of life under socialism, having been born after the fall of the USSR, can only keep a single candidate afloat for so long before he's done in by the tyrannical machinations of the Democratic party's inevitable frontrunner, Hillary Clinton. In the Texas primary, he lost Austin. It's over.

Rep. Tulsi Gabbard Quits DNC Post After Row Over Bernie Sanders

By on 2.29.16 | 12:13PM

The media was obsessed with Donald Trump's KKK gaffe all weekend (though one could hardly call feigning ignorance of the Ku Klux Klan and its leadership a gaffe - more like a willful hedging Trump thought would insulate him from cries of racism while keeping his white supremacist social media army squarely in his camp), so they seemed to ignore an important piece of news emanating from the opposite party camp. 

As Hillary Clinton took a "decisive" victory in South Carolina and Bernie Sanders crept to Super Tuesday states with his tail between his ill-fitting pant legs, the trouble brewing in Bernie's camp about Clinton's hold on the Democratic superdelegates, finally boiled over in the Democratic National Committee. Rep. Tulsi Gabbard, a young, outspoken Congresswoman from Hawaii, resigned her DNC post in disgust after a rift with the organization over a debate schedule - and a delegate system - that rigged the system in favor the DNC's chosen candidate. 

Are You Ready for BernieSingles Online Dating?

By on 2.17.16 | 11:36AM

Obviously, it's difficult for Bernie Sanders supporters to find meaningful, long term relationships. After all, who would want to be saddled with the burden of having their paycheck "redistributed" to another, non-contributing human being for the rest of their lives, when they can have productive, collaborative partnerships? 

But if you love Bernie and you need a lover, there may be an option for you. 

Introducing "Bernie Singles," the first all-socialist, all-Bernie Sanders dating site on the web!

Bernie Sanders Didn’t Make a Paycheck Until He Turned 40

By on 2.16.16 | 12:25PM

Bernie Sanders is beloved by a lot of people who live in their parents' basement and work part time to pay the bare minimum on the student loans they collected in pursuit of their Gender Studies degrees. Ostensibly, this is because your typical Millennial ne'er do well is fascinated by the idea of receiving things for free from the government in return for maintaining their citizenship, or because they heard about Bernie Sanders in their subversive knitting group or picked up a campaign flier at Urban Outfitters.

But if it turns out that the "takers" of the world are seeing their own reflection in Bernie's LensCrafters clearance section specs, it's because, it turns out, Bernie Sanders is, indeed, one of their own: a man who failed to earn a decent paycheck for actual work until almost his 40th birthday.

Despite a prestigious degree, however, Sanders failed to earn a living, even as an adult. It took him 40 years to collect his first steady paycheck — and it was a government check.

Bernie Sanders Wins New Hampshire, but Hillary Clinton Gets All the Delegates

By on 2.10.16 | 2:19PM

Last night seemed like a runaway success for "outsider" candidate Bernie Sanders. He beat Hillary Clinton by a solid twenty points, in every single demographic. He made it next to impossible for Hillary Clinton to say that she's won the "hearts" or "minds" of New Englanders, and while he's definitely had home court advantage, he performed better than even he could have reasonably expected.

But while Bernie may have earned all the accolades, Hillary Clinton - not Bernie Sanders - will come away with most of New Hampshire's delegates

And you thought politics was fair? Shame on you.

Though Bernie Sanders won the New Hampshire primary in a landslide over Hillary Clinton, he will likely receive fewer delegates than she will.

Sanders won 60 percent of the vote, but thanks to the Democratic Party’s nominating system, he leaves the Granite State with at least 13 delegates while she leaves with at least 15 delegates.

Bernie Sanders Admits He’s Open to a Middle Class Tax Hike

By on 1.18.16 | 4:03PM

Last night, if you were savvy enough to catch it (considering it was deliberately positioned opposite playoff football and Downton Abbey), the two candidates for the Democratic Presidential nomination faced off while Martin O'Malley looked on helplessly. To the untrained eye, flipping through stations to avoid prime time network entertainment, it looked like, in the words of Jim Gaffigan, your grandparents arguing. If you paid attention, it was still your grandparents arguing.

Did Bernie Sanders and His Wife Steer Campaign Money to Friends and Family?

By on 1.7.16 | 12:42PM

For a man who has Many Serious Thoughts about the relationship between cronyism and government efficiency, Bernie Sanders and his wife certainly seem to have taken advantage of the public system themselves, when given the chance. 

According to a report by the Washington Free Beacon, Sanders and his wife frequently steered money from his campaign and her job at a Burlington College to their own benefit, and to the benefit of their kids, and used their positions of influence to do favors for family friends.

According to Jane O’Meara Sanders, the senator’s wife, Sanders’ House campaigns paid her more than $90,000 for consulting and ad placement services from 2002 to 2004. She pocketed about $30,000 of that money.

Her daughter Carina Driscoll, Sanders’ stepdaughter, also drew a salary from the campaign. She was paid more than $65,000 between 2000 and 2004, according to her mother.

Mike Rowe Rips Bernie Sanders on Free College

By on 12.16.15 | 12:02PM

Looks like Mike Rowe, perhaps best known as the former host of Dirty Jobs on the Discovery Channel, has had it with Bernie Sanders’ unrealistic “everyone should of to college” mentality. On his Facebook page, he wrote this:

Bernie Sanders tweets, “At the end of the day, providing a path to go to college is a helluva lot cheaper than putting people on a path to jail.”

I wonder sometimes, if the best way to question the increasingly dangerous idea that a college education is the best path for the most people, is to stop fighting the sentiment directly, and simply shine a light on the knuckleheads who continue to perpetuate this nonsense. This latest tweet from Bernie Sanders is a prime example. In less than 140 characters, he’s managed to imply that a path to prison is the most likely alternative to a path to college. Pardon my acronym, but…WTF!?…