Loose Canons

Loose Canons

2014: The Awful, Miserable, Funny Year

By 12.31.14

For President Obama 2014 could hardly have been worse but for humorists — especially those of us who take delight in the inept, the corrupt, the gutless and the rest of the political world — it wasn’t bad at all.

JANUARY had barely when the tone for the year was set by two voluptuous PETA ladies, clad only in bikinis made of lettuce. The two, protesting in behalf of vegetarianism, chose to do so outdoors. In Minneapolis, at 9:30 a.m., when it was about 4⁰ F. In a related event, the Russian ship Akademik Shokalskiy (which means “grade inflator”) — sent to the Antarctic to study the effects of global warming — became stuck in the ice, as did the Chinese ship sent to rescue its crew. Global warming continued to stun the world in the January 5th game between the Packers and the Forty-Niners which was played at a temperature of +5⁰ F, and sank from there.

Loose Canons

Sen. Feinstein Offers Tears for Terrorists

By 12.15.14

If you’re at all knowledgeable of the CIA’s actions since the 9-11 attacks, and if you read the “torture report” released Tuesday by Sen. Dianne Feinstein’s Democrats on the Senate Select Committee on Intelligence, you’ll have to conclude that it is as much a work of fiction as the Rolling Stone article condemning fraternity life at the University of Virginia for condoning a culture of rape.

The SSCI report was written with Jonathan Gruber’s philosophy in mind, that Americans are so ill-informed, stupid, and gullible that they’ll buy any well-crafted narrative.

Let’s cut to the chase: no one can defend those rogue CIA interrogators who caused two deaths of detainees or who did things such as force-feed detainees anally or stuff a man into a small box for ten days. But the vast majority who didn’t — especially those who conducted interrogations under the “enhanced interrogation techniques” program — deserve to be defended against the charges Feinstein’s report levies against them.

Her report had three objectives.

Loose Canons

Republicans Reject Their Mandate

By 12.8.14

Mary Landrieu’s defeat in Louisiana on Saturday should have put paid to Obama’s statism. But it didn’t because Republicans evidently have dedicated themselves to throwing away the mandate to end Obamaism that voters gave them in November. Some used to call the Republicans the “stupid party,” but what is going on now goes much farther than mere stupidity can account for.

How else can you view the responses to Obama’s unconstitutional — and hence, illegal — immigration amnesty declaration? The problem extends far beyond that, but the immigration amnesty is the most apt example because it is the most current.

Last Wednesday, House Rules Committee Chairman Rep. Pete Sessions (R-TX) — certainly not to be confused with anti-amnesty stalwart Sen. Jeff Sessions (R-AL) — made a startling statement. Pete Sessions said that Republican leaders intend to push an amnesty bill through in January that would subject only the most dangerous illegal alien criminals to deportation.

Let me say that again: the Republican leaders of the House want to endorse Obama’s action by passing a law to embrace it and call it their own.

Loose Canons

Après Hagel: Replacing the Irrelevant

By 12.1.14

You will hear a lot between now and when Congress convenes in January about how urgent it is that Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel’s replacement be confirmed by the Senate. The president will nominate someone and then shrug his shoulders at the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, noting that things aren’t going well, and asking, “What do you expect? The Republicans are to blame because they haven’t confirmed the new defense secretary.”

It will all be baloney, of course, because we know that the secretary of defense’s job has been neutered by Obama’s White House team and it will remain so as long as he’s president.

We know this from any number of factual emanations from the administration, not the least of which was former defense secretary Bob Gates’s memoir, Duty, in which he whinged at great length about how all national security decisions were made by the president himself or his White House National Security Council. There is no evidence to show that the White House gave Hagel any greater authority or leeway, and there is no reason to expect that his successor will find any change.

Loose Canons

Relaxed in Tehran

By 11.24.14

As sure as President Obama will pardon a ceremonial turkey this week, we know others will not be so lucky in the White House kitchen. The biggest diplomatic turkey—Obama’s nuclear deal with Iran—will be similarly pardoned and excused quickly while the foreboding we should all feel about it will be ignored in the launch of the holiday season.

As this is written, no announcement of the inevitable postponement of the Iran nuclear negotiations has come. But today the draft pseudo-deal with the Iranian government expires. All of the entrails we can read bode ill not just for the continued stalemate, but also for our reaching a deal that will not ensure the Iranians’ ability to produce nuclear weapons in secret, beyond our intelligence community’s capability to detect Iran’s decision to accomplish its ambition.

Loose Canons

Happy Birthday, Teufel Hunden

By 11.10.14

Two hundred and thirty-nine years ago today, they were born at the Tun Tavern in Philadelphia. The news of their birth traveled far more slowly than they did. A short time later, according to their lore, their first man reported for duty aboard a US Navy ship. The officer of the deck barked, “What the hell are you?” and said, “You go aft and sit down ’till I find out.” The Tripolitan pirates didn’t know who they were when a handful marched across five hundred miles of Libyan desert in 1805. Led by a fiddle-playing Irish-American lieutenant named Presley Neville O’Bannon, they attacked Derna under a fierce barrage from three U.S. Navy ships, overcame odds of more than ten-to-one. and seized Derna in less than three hours.

Loose Canons

Our C.S. President

By 11.3.14

To paraphrase Jeremiah Wright, the president’s long-time spiritual leader, the chickens**t is coming home to roost. The problem is that Obama and his White House Brat Pack will make sure it continues to do so for another two years.

The President of Chickens**t’s team expresses his policies and acts upon them in consistent disregard for America’s national security interests and those of our allies. How different was former National Security Council spokesman Tommy Vietor’s statement last May that he couldn’t imagine how anyone could still be concerned with the Benghazi attacks — he exclaimed to Fox News’ Bret Baier, “Dude, that was like two years ago” — from a senior Obama administration official last week calling Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu “a chickens**t” and a “coward”?

There is no difference whatever except in context. The statements are expressions of a dominant mindset in the White House. It’s a devolution from the “best and the brightest” of the Kennedy era to the “most narcissistic and arrogant” of Obama’s presidency.

Loose Canons

Those Chemical Weapons: A Buried Story of the Iraq War

By 10.20.14

The New York Times report of October 14 should have been bigger news. Big enough to reshape the entire history of the Iraq war that toppled Saddam Hussein at the cost of more than 3,500 American lives and $1 trillion. So far, in the midst of the Ebola crisis, another Iraq war, and so much more, it wasn’t more than a one-day story.

The article reported that contrary to the Democratic narrative, there were chemical weapons found in Iraq. Around 5,000 aviation bombs, artillery warheads, and shells were found over about an eight-year period beginning in 2004. A number of soldiers were injured in handling them.

Maybe, someday, enough information will be declassified so that the full story will be known. I have a small part of the information to relate.

Loose Canons

Open Season on Leader Barack

By 10.13.14

ISIS is about to conquer Baghdad while the Kurds are begging for arms and American airpower to prevent the massacre of the people in Kobane. Joey Biden accidentally told the truth about Turkey’s placid approach to ISIS but apologized quickly. Ukraine has gone quiet for the moment but Kim Jong-un remains missing and — given his five weeks’ absence — intelligence analysts are trying to figure out if the North Koreans are about to go off the rails again. And TSA’s experts are screening passengers at some airports, including JFK, to ensure our borders remain open to anyone who will not die of Ebola before they go through customs inspection. The rest of the world is in about the same shape.

Loose Canons

President Alfred E. Neuman

By 10.6.14

On Saturday evening, a flight from Brussels landed at Newark carrying a man thought to be a Liberian who was vomiting and apparently showing other symptoms of Ebola, the disease that has broken out in epidemic proportions in West Africa. He was evacuated and later found not to be infected with the disease, which — if left untreated — can kill up to 90 percent of the people who are infected.

That’s a higher percentage than those killed by bubonic plague, which kills about 66 percent of those untreated.

Last week, a Wall Street Journal report gave us insight into President Obama’s desperate efforts to concede enough to Iran in his nuclear weapons negotiations that even the contumacious ayatollahs would have to give him a guarantee of peace in our time.

Still, America remains preternaturally cool. Nothing bothers us. We shouldn’t panic, but we can’t have faith that the government can handle this and has everything under control. Don’t just take the word of the head of the Centers for Disease Control because what he says is nonsensical.