Clinton Foundation Reorganizes to Keep Foreign Money Flowing

By on 4.16.15 | 11:58AM

Hillary Clinton may be reticent to speak on the subject of foreign policy just yet - she's peppered her rare interactions with actual media with bland policy positions mostly having to do with middle class Americans and favorite burrito proteins - but that might be because the Clinton Foundation is still trying to work out how they're going to accept all that foreign cash while one of their founders is campaigning to be leader of the free world.

Turns out, they're still going to accept the foreign cash, at least as far as six key countries, with whom the US already has relationships, are concerned. Any other foreign national or government looking to have a direct impact on a major Presidential contender's foreign policy should instead donate to the Clinton Global Initiative, which is not directly affiliated with the Clinton Foundation in any way other than being directly affiliated with the Clinton foundation. 

No, seriously.


Exclusive: Trump Says Obama Shows ‘Total Desperation’ on Iran

By 4.16.15

Donald Trump wrote the book on deal making. Literally.

Back there in 1987 Trump’s The Art of the Deal was, as Trump books tend to be, a number one bestseller. It was a primer on — what else? — how to do a deal. The man who built a global empire and gained a reputation almost thirty years ago for “an unprecedented education in the practice of deal-making” gave readers a “streetwise” look at how to do a serious deal. To do it well, to make it good — to get what you want.

Now, in an exclusive conversation with The American Spectator The Donald talks about President Obama’s negotiations with Iran over nuclear weapons — and makes plain Obama has violated several of what his long ago classic on deal-making called “Trump Cards: The Elements of the Deal.” 

Where did Obama go wrong? The President violated the basic Trump rule that to get a good deal “use your leverage.” Wrote Trump:

Al Sharpton Does Not Fully Understand Hunger Strikes

By on 4.15.15 | 5:33PM

In case you've forgotten that people besides Hillary Clinton exist in this world, we're still patiently waiting on Congress to either confirm or rebuff the Obama Administration's nominee to replace Eric Holder as head of the Department of Justice. Loretta Lynch, as expected, does not share the ideological viewpoint of many Republicans that the DOJ should concern itself with enforcing the nation's rules and protecting the nation's citizenry, and less with organizing media events that prolong Al Sharpton's cultural relevance.

Of course, not one to be left out of a situation that could rightly benefit him, and left without a job since families have started requesting that he not use their childrens' deaths as campaign platforms, Al Sharpton surfaced today to protest the Lynch nomination process, allege that lawmakers who are stalling her confirmation are abject racists, and announce that he will undertake a hunger strike, in the vein of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and other civil rights leaders, until Loretta Lynch's DOJ office nameplate is printed and hung.

Man Lands Gyrocopter on Capitol Lawn, Wants Campaign Finance Reform

By on 4.15.15 | 5:04PM

What do you get when you cross Citizens United, an unlawful single-pilot airborne vehicle, the Postal Service and Florida? Apparently, the dude who decided to land his "gyrocopter" on the US Capitol lawn this morning in order to protest the negative influence of money in politics. 

As no one was hurt, and the Secret Service quickly scrambled to tackle the guy (though not too quickly, as I believe they knew he was in a gyrocopter, and that should have been public humiliation enough), feel free to be both completely concerned for the state of mental health treatment in this country, and amused that this is all coming courtesy of America's craziest state. 

The IRS Spent Lots of Cash on Office Furniture and Toys

By on 4.15.15 | 2:27PM

According to a press release from Sen. Orrin Hatch's office, the IRS has spent a boatload of taxpayer money on lots of things it really doesn't need

Now, normally, accusing a government agency of making terrible financial decisions is all in a day's work for Congress, the Inspector General, and political writers who, since Hillary Clinton has halted her ridiculous van tour of Iowa to beg for money from Des Moines donors, but today, being Tax Day, is special. After all, what could possibly make this day better than to see not only what the government is wasting your hard-earned money on, but what the agency charged from extracting it from the very marrow of your bones has been buying with their share. 

Turns out, the list begins with an overpriced stair climber (for use in a building with stairs), and ends with Thomas the Tank Engine.

TSA Agents Fired for Conspiring to Touch Junk

By on 4.15.15 | 2:10PM

Here's a fun fact that you might not have known about the X-ray backscatter machines, that I just learned from this scintillating report of two Denver International Airport TSA agents being canned because they had a conspiracy to pat down the crotches attractive men: the screener who operates the machine is required to enter "male" or "female" into the computer system. If you enter female and the person is actually male, it'll automatically indicate that the person coming through the machine is, well, packing.

Over the course of several months, the two Denver TSA agents in question used this loophole to take survey after survey of vulnerable airline passengers that one of the TSA agents found especially attractive. 

Admin Officially Removes Cuba from State Sponsors of Terror List

By on 4.14.15 | 5:04PM

The Obama Administration announced today that, as part of its ongoing "normalization" of America's relationship with Cuba, that we will officially drop Cuba off of the "SSOT" list, or the "State Sponsors of Terrorism" list. 

According to Wikipedia, Cuba was placed on the list in March of 1982 and remained there because if its support for FARC, the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia, and ETA, the Basque Fatherland and Liberty movement in Spain. Cuba has maintained, publicly, that its support for armed revolution in other parts of the world is a thing of the past, but until recently, the Castro regime has sheltered members of both FARC and ETA. Although it allowed the TSA to view its airports late last year, it also does not particupate in any anti-terrorism measures or anti-terrorism task forces, raising speculation that terrorists from other parts of the world have used or could use Cuba to enter the U.S.

Hillary Clinton Tries to Get Noticed at Chipotle

By on 4.14.15 | 12:08PM

I'm adamant that this Hillary Clinton road trip is a huge missed opportunity, as far as social media communications are concerned. While a smart candidate in a decked out van would be stopping at every roadside attraction along the way in order to meet the Real People who make up the Real America, Hillary has confined her intereactions with the proletariat to those that take place only where she is absolutely forced to stop. There are no unplanned exits from the Hillary Vehicle. If you are not desperately in need of a bathroom or the van is about to run out of gas, there is clearly no reason the Champion of the Middle Class can see to stop. 

Unfortunately for the Caravan of Compassion, certain staff members are not vampires and as such, require regular sustenance in the form of overpriced "Mexican" food. As such, Hillary Clinton has been forced to make the occasional stop at Chipotle, where she has done her level best to make sure everyone knows someone famous is in their establishment.

The Hillary Watch

Hillary Is Not a Woman: She’s a Liberal

By 4.14.15

“I suppose it’s fair to say: don’t you someday want to see a woman president?” Thus asks Hillary Clinton, newly declared for the presidency. Or is that re-declared?

The problem? Hillary Clinton isn’t a woman. And any Republican who is running for president who thinks she is will deserve the loss coming their way.

What is Hillary Clinton? She is in fact… ready? A liberal. A plain, garden-variety left-wing liberal. I know, I know. She looks like a woman. But as conservatives have long since learned, looking like a woman doesn’t make you a woman.

I learned this myself years ago in a battle over the nomination of a friend of mine to a seat on the Third Circuit Court of Appeals. He had a lot of supporters who happened to be women. They were professionals. Lawyers and serious lawyers at that, active in the legal profession with considerable professional reputations and accomplishments. But, alas.

Is Hillary About to Get Rahm’ed?

By on 4.13.15 | 4:16PM

She's been on the campaign trail for less than 24 hours, but already the media has been unable to find the actual "van" Hillary is traveling in, people on Facebook are beginning to notice that she might have dyed her eyebrows for the occasion, and Hillary is having a tough time rounding up support from fellow New York politicians for her bid for the Democratic Presidential nomination. 

I'm not sure about the eyebrows, honestly, and I tend to think this road trip is underwhelming (don't people typically stop at more than gas stations on a road trip? Wouldn't a Hillary Clinton tour of roadside attractions like the World's Largest Frying Pan and the Duct Tape Capitol of the World be social media gold?), but the last one is what really has me worried - or, at least, it would have me worried if I were suddenly knocked unconscious by a falling rock and woke up thinking I was Chelsea: prominent New York Democrats like NYC Mayor Bill De Blasio and governor Andrew Cuomo have yet to say whether they're on board the Hillary van