Mary Landrieu’s Loss Was Hilariously Terrible

By on 12.8.14 | 1:46PM

Obviously, we all know what's actually responsible for Mary Landrieu's Senate loss - racism - but what we haven't discussed is exactly how terribly Mary Landrieu performed in her runoff against Bill Cassidy. We should, because the 9th Senate seat pickup for Republicans wasn't just a subtle, narrow win on the heels of a much larger national trend. It was the kind of delicious, total walloping that comes around perhaps only once a cycle, if that. The only close thing in recent memory, that I can think of, was that time I agreed to do a shot of blue alcohol every time Mitt Romney lost a swing state in 2012.

Anyway, here are some of the gorier details

— Cassidy won 49 of Louisiana's 64 parishes. Six years ago, when Landrieu defeated Republican John Kennedy without a runoff, the Democratic senator carried 38 parishes.

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Republicans Vote to Block Executive Action on Immigration, Sort Of

By on 12.4.14 | 5:28PM

The House just passed a bill that would, should it pass the Senate and survive an almost certain veto, prevent President Obama from using executive authority to grant amnesty to millions of undocumented immigrants.

The bill was originally going to be a rider on a government funding bill, but backing down from that almost certain fight, John Boehner decided to bring the bill to a vote separately, because he's ready go home and get started on his Christmas Mystic Tan, and you all are just getting really annoying

The House of Representatives issued another largely symbolic rebuke to President Barack Obama's agenda Thursday, voting to roll back his immigration executive order that could help up to 4.1 million people avoid deportation. The measure narrowly passed with a vote of 219 to 197.

Seven Republicans from districts with large number of Latinos voted against it while three Democrats from more red districts supported the measure.

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A Pro-Hillary Org Released a Country Music Video and it is My Everything

By on 12.4.14 | 2:08PM

I could describe the video for you, but that would deprive you of the joy and emotion you'll feel as you listen to this masterpiece of a music video. 

Stand With Hillary, which is not "Ready for Hillary" but is also clearly ready for Hillary, has released a country music video for the Presidential candidate that's no doubt considered one of the least "country" people in American history. It features everything that makes America America: apple pie, construction workers, grazing cattle, riding motorcycles in the country, mountains, the family blessing before dinner, little children holding fireworks, and the aging, radical matriarch of a well-to-do political dynasty.

Becasuse, obviously. 

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Political Hay

The Cautionary Tale of Elizabeth Lauten

By 12.4.14

Elizabeth Lauten did something dopey. Say again, dopey. Criticizing President Obama’s children — daughters sixteen and thirteen — was dopey. Presidential children, particularly minor children, are generally considered to be off limits. Ms. Lauten, the communications director for Tennessee Congressman Stephen Lee Fincher, took a social media poke at the two and is today jobless as a result.

There is a lesson in this for young conservatives. This is how the Left operates. What Lauten did, as mentioned, was dopey. Silly. But a front-page piece in the Washington Post? Breathless firestorm coverage from ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, USA Today, Politico, the Huffington Post, and on and on through the roster? Well, no. Did she have to resign her job? Of course not. Suspended or disciplined in some fashion? Yes. But allow the firestorm to consume her career? No.

Yet those two things have come to pass. So what is the lesson for young conservatives?

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White House Not Totally Sure if Ash Carter is SecDef Nominee

By on 12.3.14 | 1:41PM

"Ash Carter" is far too close to "Ashton Kutcher" for my tastes, and I'm going to stand by that as the reason I'm not fully supporting his nomination. Well, that, and I'm pretty sure that he's the Obama Administration's only choice that would effectively rubber stamp any administration decision on handling foreign policy matters, even if the decision is blindingly stupid. He's certainly not my first choice, and I've only had 24 hours to review his record, which is scant, to say the least.

The good news for me, I guess, is that he's not the Obama Administration's first choice, either. According to a CNN story about Chuck Hagel's rather sudden departure as Secretary of Defense, even as the White House was drying the ink on Ash Carter's press release, the President's staff was still scouring the Internet for a slightly better defense secretary.  

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Your New Ambassador to Hungary Used to Produce Soap Operas

By on 12.2.14 | 3:46PM

The White House had trouble today explaining why the former producer of The Bold and the Beautiful, Colleen Bell, is our new ambassador to Hungary. ABC's John Karl, asking questions of Josh Earnest wonders  does she have any qualifications to be named ambassador to a major European nation, apparently missing the memo that the only major qualification you need in this or any administration to named as ambassador to a major European nation is a fairly fat pocketbook (or, in this case, the ability to get others to open their fairly fat pocketbooks).

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Barack Obama May Try to Shut Down Government Over Amnesty

By on 12.2.14 | 3:30PM

The brief government shutdown was so much fun last year that it looks like we're going to try it again. This time, instead of having to listen to Ted Cruz read Dr. Seuss into the Congressional record, however, we'll have to listen to the White House explain why the Postal Service can't deliver your Christmas catalogs and coupon books efficiently. Having apparently taken a page out of Sen. Cruz's playbook, the Obama Administration, through Josh Earnest, has noted that if the Republicans try to pass a budget bill that deliberately excludes funding for the President's executive amnesty, we'll the President is just going to shut this whole thing down, take his ball and pout in a corner.

White House spokesman Josh Earnest said Monday that President Barack Obama will block a government budget bill if the GOP denies him the funds needed to provide amnesty to millions of illegal immigrants.

“Yes,” Earnest said when asked by ABC News reporter Jonathan Karl if Obama would veto a government-wide budget that defunded the amnesty program.

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Mary Landrieu’s Opponent Will Probably Kill Your Dog or Something

By on 12.2.14 | 12:01PM

Mary Landrieu has to take what she can get as far as organizations willing to pay for airtime. After a disasterous final debate last night and a depressing lack of funds left in the bank as she faces a runoff against a Republican for her Louisiana Senate seat, Mary Landrieu must turn to her only friends among her Louisiana constituents. And, apparently, her only friends among her Louisiana constituents are...the Humane SocietyAnd it's spending around $100K on television ads.

Beware, Louisiana. If you do not vote for Mary Landrieu for Senate, that beloved pet of yours will die a horrible, painful death, probably at the hands of Mary Landrieu's Republican opponent.

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To Be Absolutely Frank

Do What the Cops Tell You: It Isn’t Rocket Science

By 12.2.14

It was shortly before Christmas in Washington, D.C., a Saturday night In the early 2000s. I had been invited to a neighborhood Christmas party on my Capitol Hill street. As it happened, afterward I was scheduled to go out to dinner with a neighbor and her two house guests, a couple visiting from Chicago, at a downtown restaurant. Shortly before the party was to begin I received a phone call from the clearly anxious party hostess. She had ordered liquor from a store on the other side of the Hill and the store had just called to say their delivery man was ill and she would have to pick it up herself. Alas, the hostess did not have a car. So she asked if I would go pick up the liquor, already paid for. 

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3,415 Regulations Announced Ahead of Thanksgiving Weekend

By on 11.26.14 | 1:10PM

While you're chatting drunkenly about Obamacare over your Thanksgiving turkey, the Obama Administration will be working overtime to make sure the 3,415 regulations they've plotted on their calendar go into effect,, since for the second year in a row, they're socking you with the details of a massive Federal spending program on a holiday weekend in the hopes that you won't notice.

This year, your holiday prize is the Federal Unified Agenda, which contains 189 new rules for running your life and costs a mere $100 million.

The federal Unified Agenda is the Obama administration’s regulatory road map, and it lays out thousands of regulations being finalized in the coming months. Under President Barack Obama, there has been a tradition of releasing the agenda late on Friday — and right before a major holiday.

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