Politics

Hillary Clinton, Backed By Wall Street, Wants to Dismantle Wall Street

By on 7.13.15 | 4:03PM

It isn't easy being Hillary Clinton. Bernie Sanders is drawing big crowds. Pantsuits weren't a staple on the Paris Fashion Week runways. Disgusting commoners want to touch you, and people want to know things about your email and Benghazi and all these things they were supposed to forget about once they were dazzled by Hillary Clinton's wisdom and beauty. 

And there's only so much pandering you can do to target demographics. Keeping women, minorities, youth and small leftist special interest groups in line is only helpful if you have the majority of the Democratic base locked down, and its increasingly apparent that she doesn't. As Bernie Sanders rants away, Hillary's numbers are slipping, and her connection with the progressives that put Obama over the top only to see him govern as (mostly) a moderate, is tenuous at best. So what's a girl to do?

Pander some more. This time, to Bernie's base. America, you need a raise. Or something.

Ted Cruz Didn’t Bulk-Buy His Own Book, Says Amazon

By on 7.13.15 | 1:45PM

Over the weekend, Ted Cruz got a rude response from the New York Times when, despite blockbuster sales for his book, A Time for Truth, the New York Times refused to put it on their weekly list of best-sellers because they were convinced - convinced, I tell you - that Ted Cruz had been instructing his campaign to buy the book in bulk in order to pad his numbers. Cruz's book, by all accounts, sold around 11,000 copies, which should have put him third on the list, behind a book about the Wright Brothers and a book written by a former Playboy bunny and reality television star.

Scott Walker: Conservative Presidential Candidate, But for How Long?

By on 7.13.15 | 12:50PM

I suppose, based on the exultant prediction Aaron is making about Scott Walker's run at the Presidency, that it's up to me to be the Debbie Downer. 

So, it's not that I don't like Scott Walker. I do. I like him even more because the very mention of his name makes liberal toes curl. He's defeated the worst of the progressive worst not once, but three times in four years, and he plans on making his vision for Wisconsin, which won over voters despite dramatic sit-ins, protests and threats to bring hippie drum circles to every school district in the state, his vision for America. His brand new campaign video says it all.

But as serious conservative contenders for the highest office abound, Scott Walker isn't necessarily among them.

Political Hay

Six Reasons Why Scott Walker Will Be Elected President

By 7.13.15

Shortly before Scott Walker was re-elected Wisconsin’s Governor for the third time in four years, I made the case that if Walker prevailed Republicans should nominate him as their presidential candidate right then and there. Since January, Walker has been at or near the top of most public opinion polls of preferred standard bearers for the GOP in 2016, and today he officially launches his White House bid, making him the 15th Republican to join the field. While this field is quite crowded, I believe it will soon become apparent that Scott Walker stands out head and shoulders above the rest. Here are the six reasons why I believe Walker will not only win the GOP nomination, but be elected President in November 2016.

1. He’s Part of the Middle Class (or He Actually Shops at Kohl’s and Sears)

OPM Hack Affects 24 Million Americans, But OPM Chief Isn’t Resigning; UPDATE: Archuleta Resigns

By on 7.10.15 | 1:12PM

Update: Approximately 20 minutes ago, OPM director Kathleen Archuleta finally submitted her resignation. Lower-level employees in charge of tech still remain. Her deputy will take over. 

*****

If you weren't certain, before, whether your personal information had been compromised in the series of Chinese hacks that hit the Office of Personnel Management earlier this year, well, let me set your mind at ease. You probably were.

Chuck Schumer Will Save You From Cell Phone Cases That Sort of Look Like Guns

By on 7.9.15 | 3:43PM

Now that he's won his battle against those Tide Pods that supposedly look like candy to small children, who are, apparently, eating them by the millions, Chuck Schumer is taking on yet another threat to your very health and safety, and everything you hold dear in this life and the next. 

Ladies and gentlemen, Chuck Schumer is here to rescue you from cell phone cases that kind of look like guns.

Sen. Charles Schumer (D-N.Y.) is raising alarm about the sale of iPhone cases that are made to look like the handle of a 9 mm handgun. 

In letters to online retailers and U.S. Customs and Border Protection, the senator said the product is a disaster waiting to happen and warned it might violate federal law. 

The New York senator's warning had an immediate effect; Amazon and eBay told news outlets they were removing listings for the product. 

Clinton Thinks Trump is a Racist But Won’t Give Back His Donation

By on 7.9.15 | 3:25PM

I suppose that, when you openly solicit donations from entire nations who still think stoning women to death for being raped is an acceptable practice, holding on to a couple hundred thousand from a guy with a big mouth and a penchant for "speaking his mind" about Mexican immigrants barely registers on your radar.

In her first television interview as a Presidential contender, Hillary Clinton (who was not asked what its like being a "feminist" candidate whose family is funded by decidedly oppressive regimes) called Trump's comments that Mexican immigrants are, generally, rapists, inappropriate and expressed her "disappointment" that the Republican Party is not doing more to rein Trump in, because, apparently, that's their job. At no time did she mention that Donald Trump and his daughter Ivanka, a successful entrepreneur in her own right, have contributed somewhere in the ballpark of $100,000 to the Clinton Foundation, and the Clinton Foundation has no plans to return the money.

Alan Grayson Will Run for Senate in Florida

By on 7.9.15 | 1:17PM

That headline should probably read, "Former Rep. Alan Grayson to Run for Senate in Florida Because This is the Best Day Ever, Sorry Democrats."

Dems have been working hard to find an acceptable replacement for Sen. Marco Rubio, who is vacating his seat to run for President. It's not very easy since, after all, the Florida Dems live in Florida, where people get high on bath salts and eat other people's faces, and dudes walk around Miami Beach wearing living snakes as accessories. The last thing they needed was noted crazypants former Rep. Alan Grayson to challenge their hand-picked candidate. 

But yet, here we are

Next year’s Florida Senate primary between Reps. Alan Grayson and Patrick Murphy will test whether Sunshine State Democrats are ready to embrace a deep-blue liberal.

Hillary Clinton Tells CNN Her Emails Were Never Subpoenaed, Which Is Weird Because They Were

By on 7.9.15 | 12:24PM

Thank heavens Hillary Clinton is still absolutely and blissfully convinced that people trust her, otherwise, she might be concerned with how quickly her softball CNN interview was fact-checked. 

There weren't any real questions to dodge in Hillary's sit-down, which aired Tuesday on CNN and marked her first interaction with the press in two months, so it's hard to believe that there'd be something so blatantly incorrect said in the first several minutes. According to the former Secretary of State, not a single human being on Earth had a problem with her private email server, all of her emails were available to investigators, who were so unconcerned with her communication, they never even issued her a subpoena.  

Freedom Watch

Trump Battles the New Totalitarians

By 7.9.15

Well, kumbaya.

The front page of The Washington Post gasps:

GOP leaders fear damage to party’s image as Donald Trump doubles down 

RNC Chairman Reince Priebus apparently has called Trump asking him to “tone it down.” (And who leaked that story?) It has gotten so bad that all the people who believed the Bush presidencies and moderate Republicanism were the savior of the GOP have now convinced themselves that leaving the White House defeated after one term (Bush 41) or leaving with a rating in the frigid 20s after two terms (Bush 43) was a serious high-water mark.

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