The Spectacle Blog

Don’t Tell Joe…It’ll Break His Heart

By on 9.8.06 | 10:39AM

Over at Rolling Stone, Matt Taibbi first calls Democrats attacks on Rumsfeld, "one of those groan-out-loud coordinated media-sandbag jobs, now standard procedure in American politics, where the various politicians separately make exactly the same pre-prepared 'jokes' in their respective 'extemporaneous' public remarks, delivering their message with all the wit and spontaneity of a Speak N' Spell," and then turns his vitriolic cannon on Joe Biden for a lengthy volley, which begins thusly:

I can take this stuff coming from most of the Democrats, but it's awfully hard to listen to this crap from Joe Biden. Actually, listening to Joe Biden sound self-righteous about anything makes me want to puke my guts out. I don't know what it is about him. Maybe it's that creepy poof of blowdried gray pubic fuzz he has now covering up that dime-store plug job on his head. Maybe it's the fact that he's been ponderously wondering aloud about his chances for the White House for eighteen straight years, his painfully obvious hard-on for power straining against his suit-slacks, ever since a plagiarism scandal and an aneurysm knocked him out of his first run. Maybe it's that his idea of outflanking the Republican Party is outspending them on the War on Drugs.

Or maybe it's just that Biden, more than almost anyone in American public life, will do or say anything that he thinks will secure him even the most temporary electoral advantage.

Oh Lord, that's tough stuff. I though Biden won the hip kids over with his frequent cussing and rooster strut? No? Didn't work for Kerry, either.

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