The Spectacle Blog

ObamaPhone Humor

By on 9.28.12 | 12:24PM

In case you haven't heard about the federal government's free cell phone program, "Lifeline", derisively called the ObamaPhone by critics (including me), it's not a joke, even though it seems like it should be:

http://washingtonexaminer.com/where-do-obama-phones-come-from/article/2509203#.UGXHNlHZ27x

The clever people over at ThePeoplesCube.com have a new article about the ObamaPhone including some of its most important features as submitted by Twitter users.

Here then are the key features of the ObamaPhone:

  • It automatically rejects calls from people with a different opinion.
  • Every time you take a picture, it produces a grimmer image of America.
  • It doesn't have a plan; it just keeps telling you how bad the other guy's plan is.
  • When it crashes, it blames your previous phone.
  • All 3 AM calls go directly to voicemail.
  • It has a really useless app called "Biden."
  • Pairing it with another device sucks all the energy out of the other unit.
  • Type in "job search" and it gives you directions to the welfare office.
  • The navigation feature covers all 57 States.
  • The default ringtone for international calls is "I'm sorry, so sorry, please accept my apology."
  • The healthcare app downloads and installs itself without your permission.
  • When you make a call, a teleprompter pops up to help you speak.
  • Restaurant reviews are all written by Michelle Obama.
  • There are never any winners on Angry Birds.
  • Instagram takes two months to process a photo and you have to fill out 3 PDFs to do so.
  • Paypal app is replaced with ReceivePal app.
  • You can't find "Jerusalem" on Google maps.
  • It turns all your Facebook friends into enemies and all your enemies into friends.
  • Don't want to work? There's an app for that, too.
  • It automatically bows down to phones made by foreign companies.
  • When you watch a YouTube video, a US ambassador gets killed.
  • When you dial "home", it calls Kenya.
  • As opposed to the iPhone, it's called the mePhone.

Congressman Tim Griffin (R-AR) has a YouTube video about this outrageous program and its costs:

As long as we're mentioning ThePeoplesCube.com web site, this is really funny too:

http://thepeoplescube.com/peoples-blog/adobe-acrobat-update-sparks-violent-protests-in-muslim-world-t9706.html

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