The Spectacle Blog

Awaiting Bill Clinton

By on 9.5.12 | 11:05AM

Oh, boy, I can't wait: The former Rapist in Chief is speaking tonight at the Democratic convention. I wonder how many coffee klatsches with shady Asian donors he'll attend beforehand. Good thing for him that disbarment doesn't mean he loses First Amendment rights. But I bet he really resents not being able any longer to rent out the Lincoln Bedroom, or to have his wife conveniently lose her investment records until statutes of limitations have run out. Even worse, he can't have aides rifle through FBI personnel files any longer. On the bright side, since he is now a multi-millionaire who is part of the one-tenth of One Percent, he and his wife no longer have need of the services of Red Bone. And.... and.... and no, we won't just "put some ice on that."

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