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The Spectacle Blog
Chris Matthews was in full-on loony mode this morning, fulminating about Republicans supposedly playing the “race card” against Barack Obama by, among other things, mentioning “work requirements” for welfare. Tell that to Bill Clinton, who signed the bill requiring work for welfare. Really, Matthews’ tired old, over-the-top accusations aren’t really worth the dignity of a response.
BUT…. Why would the right play the “race card” against Obama? Is Obama black?
Ohmygosh! Do we really have a BLACK president? As in, like, not 100% Caucasian? Who knew? Hey, people, wink wink, nudge nudge: Obama is one of those guys with mixed blood. SHhhh. Keep it quiet now. I mean, you know, let all your friends know, but only in code. Like, don’t call it black. Say that he’s “dark.” Don’t call his cheap shots “gutter politics,” call them “street ball politics.” Yeah, stuff like that. Because, you know, he’s one of them. Hey, aren’t Kenyans good distance runners? Call him a distance runner, but one who fades in the stretch. Everybody will know what that means. Or at least everybody who thinks like us. The rest of those fools will never know what we’re talking about. All those people who like the idea of voting for a black man — well, we can tell them Obama’s people are from Kansas. That means white, right? Cue up the Wizard of Oz references, guys. You know, Toto and not in Kansas anymore, all that stuff. That’s what we’ll preach in the “inner city.” For the rest of us real Americans, we’ll make Obama into a regular Kip Keino, if you know what I mean http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f0ICn7-Uaqk — you know, the kinda guy who gets defeated by a real Kansan, like Jim Ryun.
Because, really, otherwise we wouldn’t know he was … ooh, this still gives me the creeps… that he was, or rather is, you know, like, black. I mean, if it weren’t for that, we’d all just be loving the Independent Payment Advisory Board death panel death spiral. We love big government, unless it’s controlled by people with dark dreams.
But really, America would never elect a black man as president if we all really knew. Never. Black. Black!! Lord forbid. We’ve just gotta spread the word. Maybe we can all buy some dog whistles and blow them. This guy doesn’t like work for welfare. This guy likes food stamps. This guy wants to tax “the man.” This guy wants to repaint the “White” House. And he really, really thinks he is going to “do the right thing.” Why, he’ll turn the Oval into a regular Spike Lee joint.
But here’s the real problem. I read somewhere the other day that we can’t even joke about Obama, because, well, any joke about Obama is by its very nature racist. What a shame. Because just the other day, from what I heard, a horse and Barack Obama walked into a bar…. And after that, Barack Obama, the Pope, and Henry Kissinger were in an airplane…. And did you hear that there once was a man named Obama, who visited a Bowlarama? Once he was within, he aimed at the pins, but….. Oh, gosh, that’s just too funny to repeat out loud.
But it’s not really believable, you know. Because a man like Obama wouldn’t be bowling; he’d be playing street ball. Wink wink. Nudge nudge.
View all comments (23) | Leave a comment
More Blog Posts by Quin Hillyer
http://spectator.org/blog/2012/08/27/hey-did-you-know-barack-obama
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Derek Leaberry| 8.27.12 @ 12:14PM
President Davis is black. I wish they'd get his name right.
Tom Kyba| 8.27.12 @ 12:24PM
OK dummies, it's me Chrissie. I've been looking for my Obama blow-up doll for weeks now. I know one of you stole it. Big joke hahaha. Now please give it back. Aw c'mon.
spike59| 8.28.12 @ 5:59AM
Jack London is sharing it with Aware and Queenofthenuts
JimH| 8.27.12 @ 12:28PM
To quote Maynard G Krebs: ‘work?’.
Grzmlyk| 8.27.12 @ 12:38PM
I am about to channel my inner liberal. Here I go.
You may have noticed that Obama is black, but you're a racist; I pay no attention to such things, and it never dawned on me that Obama is black. He looks completely normal to me.
Only a racist would l0ok at his complexion, or his hair, or his build, or his vocal timber and conclude that he is an "African American Gentleman." I'm so happy that I don't notice people's race. I'm above it all, you see. People are just people to me.
Ok, that's not quite true.
I do notice white people. And we all know that white people are EVIL. Well, except those of us, like me, who love Chris Matthews, listen to NPR and believe the daily flattery of the "mirror, mirror, on the wall, who's the fairest progressive of them all?" New York Times.
Now I must leave and go find the murderous gangsta of no specific color who just busted a cap in an old woman's a** and killed her because she only had $40 in her purse and he was entitled to a LOT more.
He needs my compassion. YOUR money, but MY compassion.
Sigh. It's GREAT to be a Democrat.
Crassus| 8.27.12 @ 3:07PM
I love you, Grzmlyk. You're a liberal.
Albert Constantine Jr.| 8.27.12 @ 10:53PM
In describing your qualifications, Grz, it is clear that an appointment as a federal judge is in your near future. Eric Holder will be dispatching a limo to take you to the Senate confirmation hearings forthwith.
Grzmlyk| 8.27.12 @ 11:19PM
I can only hope, Albert. I've always wanted to create laws out of whole cloth while wearing a black robe.
And the first law I'll make - er, I mean the first case I'll adjudicate (nudge, nudge, wink wink) will cut to the chase and skip to the end game of all liberal policies: I'll decree that day is night, up is down, good is evil, intelligence is stupidity, ignorance is wisdom, prejudice is equanimity, morality is wrong, immorality is right, and nihilism is creation.
Whew! I can hardly wait to force people to bow to my view of Social Justice! I'm going to LOVE being a Supreme Court judge and tearing down every last edifice of civilization and obliterating every last vestige of human decency in this country.
Two questions: The limo that Holder is sending has an open bar, right?
And I do have a standing invitation to all New York Times confabs and inside-the-beltway cocktail parties, right?
Occam's Tool| 8.28.12 @ 10:48AM
I try to avoid listening to National Psychotic Radio. Too much like work.
Grzmlyk| 8.28.12 @ 12:32PM
NPR is literally the most insidious propaganda arm we have in America.
It spins a cocoon of self-satisfaction around the ostensibly educated bourgeoisie. It soothes them. Tells them they're smart. That they appreciate the finer things. That they are eclectic and interesting - and just a little bit bohemian. That they love all people and only want good things to happen on planet earth. That they are the ones they have been waiting for.
I used to listen to NPR - although I've always leaned conservative, I never realized how insidious the mainstream media is. My awakening began when I was in the high tech community in public relations - pr firms being staffed overwhelmingly by young, attractive, ambitious, presumptuous women.
I swear, whenever I talked to one of these control-freak, entitled harridans about any topic outside of our daily work, EVER SINGLE conversation they would initiate would begin, "I was listening to NPR the other day, and . . . "
Dogmatic liberal pabulum would invariably follow.
NPR, combined with the despicable, mendacious, self-serving NY Times, has been enough to turn our upper middle class into vain fools. Almost makes ABC, CBS, NBC, PBS, The Chicago Trib, the L.A. Times and every magazine that is published, every TV show that is produced and every movie that hits the big screen superfluous.
Bob Grant| 8.27.12 @ 1:03PM
He may be black but he's barely African American in the sense that (A) he has no roots to slavery and (B) he never really lived the African American experience growing up.
By that measure I'm just as African American as obama.
The truth is he grew up in a very dysfunctional environment, both his mom and dad were selfish intellectual-gypsy-socialist types with no parenting skills whatsoever, only to be dumped off to almost equally dysfunctional grandparents.
Barack Obama Sr., Lolo Sotero, Stanley Dunham, Frank Marshall Davis, the words of Saul Alinsky and Frantz Fannon, Bill Ayers, Reverend Jeremiah Wright...to understand THESE people is to understand Barack Hussein Obama!
And who are these people? All are anti-colonialists who despise everything the USA represents.
The fact that we are not allowed to even discuss welfare to work requirements without being labeled racists, prevents us from discussing who this man - Barack Hussein Obama - really is, and what his agenda is all about.
The black issue is a huge red herring, a squid cloud, which distracts us from discussing the real, substantive issues.
Dai Alanye | 8.27.12 @ 1:24PM
According to the most popular theory among paleo-anthropologists, Homo sapiens developed in Africa. Thus we are all Afro-Americans.
Well, those of us who aren't Neanderthal or Homo erectus, at least.
Occam's Tool| 8.28.12 @ 10:52AM
My Dear Dai: It is time for your Kinky Friedman lyric of the day---
Homo Erectus:
I left barber college
Searchin' for knowledge,
Went to the university.
I must confess, sir
This lady professor
She turned me on to anthropology.
Now I'm a homo erectus
Got to connect this
Bone that I discovered yesterday.
Tyrannosaurus
Lived in the forest,
Died because it's heart got in the way.
Dear doctor howard
Come down from your tower
And join me for lunch at the ¡°y¡±.
Although you're thirty
I still think you're pretty
Let's give it that good ole college try.
More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyri.....man/#share
Grzmlyk| 8.27.12 @ 1:29PM
My opinion is that we drop this "African American" crap. In the words of the fad-crazy media, that's ALWAYS a "dog-whistle" for "black victim."
After all, there are many African Americans who are white - those with connections to the Afrikaners, among others.
But you'd never call Charlize Theron an "African American."
But she is. Even though she's white.
Oldefarte| 8.27.12 @ 1:04PM
OMG is he not only black but an American to boot? Someone told me recently that one of his book's jacket claimed him to be Kenyan or something. A missprint, no doubt. Wait though, I've also been told that he's a Christian and that he was a faithful attendant at a BLACK NATIONALIST ''''''Christian'''''''church for twenty years maybe? Well "GD America" I suppose! I'm really getting confused now, since they also informed me that he had totally attended expensive PRIVATE schools throughout his life, but that his mother was partially impoverished while living in Indonesian villages with goats, chickens, exotic birds, etc [but no doubt she was a big believer in saving her money for his educational purposes [or possibly had some fond admirers and wealthy benefactors from say the oil regions of the middle east etc]. I can't figure this out so I'll just give up and let the MSM inform me of the real truth, as they always do!!!!!
Oldefarte| 8.27.12 @ 1:06PM
PS: Oh and as to that pansy-arsed Matthews this morning, someone should shove Rachel's jock stray in his pie-hole and push him off of MSNBC's employment cliff [since he's a disgustingly vile, partisaned, bigoted AH, and the poorest excuse for a new reporter that G-Almighty ever gave breath to]!!!!!
Oldefarte| 8.27.12 @ 3:48PM
To MSNBC: I watched in disgust as the poor excuse for a news journalist Chris Matthews insulted and verbally attacked the RNC's chairman on your 'Morning Joe' TV program this morning. For a show's guest to be disgustingly manhandled by a employee of your network was outlandish and sadly stupid. You should be ashamed to employ someone who cannot maintain at least a partially unbiased attitude when asking questions of a show's guest. I'd recommend that your manager-executives consider terminating the employment of Matthews for same unless he totally apologizes for his asinine remarks!!!!!
RAM| 8.27.12 @ 1:07PM
The truth is harder for Obama's flacks to take than any innuendo.
TeaPartyNow| 8.27.12 @ 3:11PM
Chrissie pissies himself needs to get a job with current tv, and then get fired for being pathetic like his old co-hort Keith Overbite. Those liberals over there on mslsd really need to upgrade their hosts. Like Al Sharpton was an upgrade, right? Hmm, well maybe after obama wins his second term, we'll see some new faces. Until then we've got tingles.
Oldefarte| 8.27.12 @ 3:51PM
IMHO, yes Sharpton is an "upgrade"to their Matthews!!!!!!!
spike59| 8.28.12 @ 6:02AM
i tried to find 'current tv' in my channel lineup, butwouldn't you know it, we don't get Channel 837,264?
Occam's Tool| 8.28.12 @ 10:53AM
Looks like Linda McMahon is going to be the next Senator from Conneticut. We may lose in Missouri, but we'll win in a lot of other places, and Mitt will be the new POTUS.
Oldefarte| 8.29.12 @ 10:52AM
OT: True, and thanks for the info. I still maintain that many here and elsewhere made a dumbars mistake in attacking Akin over his truly dumbars foot-in-mouth event. He apologized and conservatives should have moved on and supported his candidacy. Palin indicated her still support for Steelman, but IMHO it's simply too late in the ballgame to switch horses in that state. Akin was up 10% prior to his tripping over his tongue, and is now down 10%. Republicans need to jump back on board his candidacy or get Steelman to replace him on the ticket and FAST....there's only 2 months left and Missouri is super important to taking back the Senate. Cheers!!!!!