The Spectacle Blog

If He’s Calm, I’m Calm

By on 1.9.09 | 1:16PM

So pronounces Jack Shafer at Slate of Barack Obama's ability to soothe a nation heading towards even more troubled economic times. Slate has, save a piece here and there, continually drooled over Obama since his campaign began. Despite that, even I'm surprised at Shafer when he extols the virtues of Obama's 'Voice' which "works like aerosolized Paxil on my limbic system, reducing my blood pressure and lifting my mood."

Shafer praises Obama's announcement of his stimulus plan, brilliantly of course, not actually called a stimulus plan (since that sounds too depressing).

Shafter continues: "When I watched him in the video below...he made me feel oddly good about the challenges of coming economic Armageddon."

Oh, how sweet. Perhaps Obama's administration will record him singing lullabies and every night will be so kind as to pipe them over a taxpayer-paid-for satellite system throughout America (or the world if it should be so lucky) so we can fall asleep to a man who makes us feel 'oddly good.'

The drooling doesn't stop there:

For one thing, he's better at remaining calmer and more deliberate in his speech patter than John Wayne in a firefight-and better at it than any politician since Ronald Reagan...[snip] It's not what Obama says that narcotizes the citizenry, but the way he says it. He can't possibly be certain that his plan will work, but he sells it as a done, settled deal, never showing a speck of doubt.

If I didn't know better, I would have thought Barack Obama had been our President for seven years already and actually done Americans a world of good.

Cynicism aside, that's my point. I'm so glad Obama makes the world feel good.  I'm glad his Voice is soothing. I'm glad he avoids talking about pain and that his desire to "bring Kumbaya moments to all endears him to the multitudes."

But he's not the President yet and he hasn't done one thing to prove his bite is as incredible as his bark.

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