The Spectacle Blog

Conservative Duck?

By on 10.10.05 | 9:58AM

Raymond Sokolov's column in today's WSJ (subscription required) accuses conservatives of acting like a third party in opposing the Miers nomination and goes on to suggest we forsake the elephant and adopt the duck as our party symbol for various reasons including that many of us shoot them for food, the domestic ones do not carry avian flu, and they are secular (?). Despite the fact that Sokolov says PETA already has taken the duck for its flag, his advice is that we should take it back and make it quack for free enterprise.

Please, Mr. Sokolov, take your duck and, well, eat it. We're not ready to give up on the elephant for many reasons. Not the least of which is that it would never have reached its current binge-spending, crony-appointing, self-immolating prominence without us. Having gotten it drunk, it's now our duty to sober it up if we can. And even if we got to the point of seeking another mascot, it would not be to the duck we would turn.

Now that the original Evil Empire is out of business, the better symbol for conservatives would be the American Grizzly. It spends most of its life alone, eschewing big government. It respects its environment. It fights only in self defense (or for love) and, moreover, does so without seeking permission from the otters, moose and chipmunks in the neighborhood. It spends little besides its own energy, and pays no tax.

But we need not plan for a new party and mascot, at least not yet. We shall toil inside and outside the Beltway to sober up the elephant. We have, at least, the few weeks before the Miers hearings begin to do so.

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