The C.S. Lewis Spectator

Screwtape Dines Out

By From the October 2013 issue

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14 September 2013 Reginald Wormwood, Esq.Wormwood Consulting, Inc.1600 K Street N.W. Washington D.C. 20006 My dear Wormwood, As you know, I have to pass on your accounts, and by Hades you’ve kept me busy! There’s dinner here, dinner there, dinner everywhere. Do you ever eat at home? And the places you go. The Inn at Little Washington, Komi, CityZen: restaurants that cater to lobbyists and one percenters. Plus I’ve looked at your entrées. Candied lark’s tongue. Eight-spice octopus. Snake venom soup.  Honestly, Wormwood, we both know how much we cleaned up during the Fed’s bailout of the bankers, but there is a limit! Still, you tell me it’s not for yourself but rather research for the mission field. Don’t I know, you ask me, that gluttony is one of our Seven Cardinal Virtues? My dear fellow, don’t lecture me about morals! Need I remind you that I was a senior lecturer in Immoral Theology when you were a young devil setting fire to little puppies’ tails?

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Ebenezer Screwtape, undersecretary of the Satanic lowerarchy, may be reached via e-mail at tempterofsouls73@hotmail.com.