Political Hay

The Brains

How will the haters ever survive Karl Rove's departure?

By 8.15.07

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When I was a kid, I remember watching a B-movie on TV called, They Saved Hitler's Brain. The plot was an incomprehensible mish-mash, but the main idea was that Nazi officials smuggled the gray matter out of Germany at the end of World War II in order that it could someday be grafted onto a body, thus continuing the evil dictator's ambition of global domination.

The resignation of political guru Karl Rove from the Bush Administration has naturally produced a similar mish-mash regarding the separation of the White House Fuehrer from his longtime brain. In some ways the reactions have been predictable. Over on the left-wing websites, there was tempered joy, but conspiracy theories still reign: "What dank cavern of iniquity will he infest next?"

King Karl is the man that liberals love to hate; a lot. Just last week, an inane video featuring yet another failed Seinfelder, Jason Alexander, was released. This dreary effort--featuring Alexander as "Rovemort" and spoofing, among other things, Rush Limbaugh's hearing loss--epitomizes the reason why liberals, in addition to their depressing and soul-stealing agenda, are just not funny.

Meantime, the liberal press is in a tizzy .While paying lip-service to his legacy of numerous electoral victories, they of course have zeroed in on the 2006 power shift, placing blame for the GOP losses squarely on his back. They gleefully cite Bush's Rovian stubbornness on Iraq as the determining factor in that contest; though were that so, neither pro-war Chris Shays nor Joe Lieberman would have been re-elected in my ultra-blue state of Connecticut.

If Rove bears any culpability for '06, it would be that neither he nor RNC chairman Ken Mehlman effectively countered the opposition's expert exploitation of the various scandals that afflicted GOP ranks. But that one loss, though painful, shouldn't dim the historic gains made in 2002 and especially in 2004 when Republicans gained four Senate seats, including that of Minority Leader Tom Daschle.

Rove's genius was in the way he revolutionized the campaigning process, utilizing Get Out the Vote and direct mail strategies, and proving that a presidential election could be won without New York or California. Most of the current GOP presidential candidates have one or more of his acolytes on board and even the Clinton campaign is said to be imitating the Rove/Bush model.

There's been much criticism of Rove on the right for what is perceived as the President's "unconservative" initiatives like his amnesty for illegal aliens and the whole "compassionate conservative" thing, and this is a fair knock. But one hopes that they might remember that Rove's major talent was winning elections, and without him, Justices Alito and Roberts would not grace the halls of the Supreme Court, nor would we be taking the fight to our bloodthirsty enemies overseas.

But maybe he does need a rest after all. Frankly, his hideously embarrassing rap-dance at the White House correspondents' dinner had me worried. And just maybe he really does want to spend time with his family. In case anyone has forgotten, wives are often considered a part of one's family, especially those facing the chasm that is the proverbial empty nest. And unlike certain past administrations, whose members left the White House considerably more well endowed than when they entered, most of the Bushies took a huge pay cut to serve the nation.

It is my hope that he stays close to home and makes a bundle on a book he's said to be working on; one that may end with his vision for total victory in Iraq vindicated. Support for the surge is on the rise. For whatever reason, the New York Times has been making noises about the folly of a major troop reduction and even the UN Security Council has voted to expand its presence in there.

In resigning at this time, Rove has plucked one of the Democrats' favorite arrows out of their quiver. Endless hearings and investigations were a promise they made when they regained power, and it's one of the few they've kept, ad nauseam. Still, even though liberals have vowed to pursue Rove to the darkest regions of Texas, his lack of proximity to Bush will have let a lot of air out of that balloon.

Of course, their thirst for revenge will not be slaked by his departure. Liberals have always needed a shadowy, Machiavellian figure like Rove to assure themselves that a moronic frat-boy like Bush could not have actually beaten them twice.

But keep in mind, should the fantasists on the far left ever see their real wish come true and impeach George W. Bush, they would then have to contend with his "other" brain, Richard B. Cheney. And that would be a movie I'd pay to see.

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About the Author

Lisa Fabrizio is a columnist who hails from Connecticut (mailbox@lisafab.com).