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Spectator's Journal

Banquet: Filling Up the Time ‘Twixt This and Supper

The highpoint of the Washington social season.

As a younger man I was less chaste and more chased, but now if I don’t chase Manhattan I can’t bank on having much to recount. One place I never go for fun is Washington, D.C. The drudgery of regulating our lives makes the folks there dreary company. So I make a living writing about a city I never visit, which explains why I have a reputation for objectivity.

But once a year I do come to see my tax dollars at play, to visit the ruling edifice wrecks. I stand in the waning heyday of the nation and watch the sunset in my winter coat, the spy who came in to the cold. And then… and then… I go to have the one guaranteed good time in town, the annual banquet of The American Spectator at the Capital Hilton.

This year marks the 45th anniversary of this great magazine I began reading in 1979, a quarter-century before I was published in its pages. The founders are still around, not only basking but still tasking, dispelling the doom and the gloom of the liberals and mocking the dumb and the glum of the pundits. They are surrounded by younger generations of protégés who bring new energy and talent into the fray.

Every year is special but this was extra-special. It was nice to say hello to Laura Ingraham, who was there for cocktails. I gave some of the other celebrities shorter shrift than usual, because I was being a loyal Dad, schmoozing up a Yale Law professor about my son’s impressive LSAT score. Then, the honor guard, the national anthem, the invocation, the food (my kosher meal was gourmet, simply scrumptious) and finally — thankfully no trite video — the program.

Ben Stein demonstrated his mastery of ceremony as he surveyed with clear eyes the government’s attempt to win his money. He shared the touching story of how Editor-in-Chief R. Emmett Tyrrell attended the funeral of Ben’s father, the late Herbert Stein, and energetically participated with rolled-up sleeves in the Jewish custom of mourners shoveling earth to fill the grave.

Editorial Director Wlady Pleszczynski got up and spelled his name, then we ran out of time. Ha, ha, just kidding. Everyone knows his real name is Wally Pless but he thought that lacked polish. He gave a rousing thanks to all the writers toiling in the vineyards while we hung our heads in humility.

G. Gordon Liddy spoke warmly of President Jimmy Carter who issued his pardon. Ha, ha, just kidding again; we were in no mood for a stunt like that after this election. Rather he spoke about his retirement and the fact that he missed getting inappropriate emails from his radio audience. He introduced industrialist T. Boone Pickens as a great American advocate of freedom.

Pickens took the microphone to admit he had expected better results on Election Night. He promised not to rest on his laurels but to put his money where his mind is and work to promote better electoral results to reflect the cause of liberty. He noted he had paid 665 million dollars in taxes over the last twelve years. I, for one, could have won the election for Romney three times over with 1/100th of that sum.

The great lion of democratic capitalism, Dr. Michael Novak, spoke eloquently of the theological basis of the American Revolution. The founders understood that if God wanted to be loved by Man “as a friend,” Man must be free. Thus William Penn’s famous declaration that “there can be no friendship when there is no freedom” is actually intended as the basis for the notion that God has endowed Man with life and liberty.

This idea was exciting to me, inasmuch as the Israelites are called “friends” of God in the prayer describing their first moment of freedom after the splitting of the sea redeemed them fully from Egypt. A great mentor of mine explained that the Hebrew word — yedid — used in that context is constructed by doubling the word yad (hand) to imply hand-in-hand friendship.

Then we got to hear from the founder and Editor-in-Chief. Mister Tyrrell gave an unbowed and uncowed defense of Constitutional liberty. He declared that liberalism is no less dead for having achieved a Pyrrhic victory in its death throes. The left is out of ideas, and they are simply running on fumes… and on fuming.

Senator Tom Coburn delivered the keynote address, admitting that on the face of it the United States was in a historical downspin, unable to face its crises in a responsible fashion. Yet he noted that this country had cheated the rules of history a time or two in the past and had the capacity to do so again.

I flew back to Miami energized. The good guys were digging in on the front lines. And I would try to do my part too over the next four years, fighting for truth 800 words at a time.

About the Author

Jay D. Homnick, commentator and humorist, is a frequent contributor to The American Spectator. He also writes for Human EventsHere he speaks at the Rally for Religious Freedom in Miami on June 8, 2012.

Letter to the Editor View all comments (13) |

Lord Lucan| 11.20.12 @ 9:09AM

Mercy!

Is that Ben Stein on the left? His face seems to have morphed, and he looks . . . old.

Mr. Homnick, when I came to the line " my kosher meal was gourmet, simply scrumptious . . ." I thought you were parodying Ben Stein. On second thought, I am sure you were parroting him, if not parodying him. Sounds just like Benny Boy.

And old Ben is wearing an electric-blue shirt with button-down collar and a yellow polka dot tie. Is he sliding gently into dementia?

I suppose Ben and Wifey stayed at their pad at the Watergate. Or they may have stayed at the hotel to be in the "thick of things."

Why was this event not hosted at the Mayflower? The meeting accomodations are so much better--more elegant--there.

DesertFlower| 11.20.12 @ 12:46PM

For Pete's sake, Lord Lucan! What is your beef with Stein? Of course he looks old ... he is old ... we are all getting old. Deal with it.

A blue shirt & yellow tie combination is no sign of dementia ... just sartorial whimsy.

Why do you care where Ben & Wifey stayed?

You may be right about the Mayflower.

Lord Lucan| 11.20.12 @ 3:01PM

It's one thing to be old, but to be old and fat--now that's too obnoxious.

I suggest Ben and other fat readers of this blog skip the Thanksgiving dinner and all it's artery-clogging trimmings. Instead, I suggest you have a salad with aged balsamic and a touch of olive oil.

After your salad, you may drink a cup of fat-free chicken broth.

Sip the chicken broth slowly so you can savor it.

Cobalt| 11.20.12 @ 5:19PM

Please show some respect.

As long as Mr. Stein didn't have to eat crow at the banquet, nothing else really matters.

Mr. Stein looks very handsome in the photo, and his shirt and tie are fine. In fact, I think those colors look even better on him, than they do on Al Sharpton.

Lord Lucan| 11.20.12 @ 6:19PM

Yes, but Al Sharpton is not as fat as Ben.

If only Ben would follow my Thanksgiving advice and sip a cup of fat-free chicken broth, instead of indulging in a gluttonous feast. If only . . .

Lord Lucan| 11.20.12 @ 6:21PM

Yours truly is thin and muscular. I hit the gym at 6 A.M. four days per week, and I eat mostly vegetarian. Some nights I have grilled fish.

Bob K| 11.20.12 @ 10:44AM

Let me guess?

Top picture: Moe, Shemp and Larry.

Bottom picture: Curley with Larry.

Middle Picture: Mr. Tudball and Mrs. Ah huh Wiggins.

TLP| 11.20.12 @ 2:11PM

Wow.

My comment was pulled.

Punks.

WaffenSS| 11.20.12 @ 8:55PM

very good!

Ralph Novy| 11.20.12 @ 3:00PM

I can only guess that, from the looks on some of these folks' faces, magic mushrooms were an integral part of this banquet.

First-class diners on the S.S. Reactionary, oblivious to the waters risen nearly to tabletop.

Ronsch| 11.20.12 @ 4:42PM

What the heck is going on today? first Dr. Sowell's Ben Steinesque article and now this drivel?

Granted, Dr. Sowell is allowed to have other interests, but damn it guys, our country is being destroyed by NerObama the Kenyan Usurper and his band of criminals.

How anybody can be energized when you visit the city in which the lamp of liberty should shine the brightest, and realize the creatures inhabiting the hallowed halls that was once the beacon of freedom have all but extinguished it.

Mnestheus| 11.21.12 @ 12:27AM

Nothing gentle about it, Lucan.

Ralph Novy| 11.24.12 @ 2:12PM

You know ... looking at this article's lead photo ... I wouldn't let any of those old creeps anywhere near any of My children. The mental/moral dysfunction is palpable.

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