The American Spectator

“We’re not sure,” said the General, hurrying beside him. “It seems to be some domestic issue. But then it wouldn’t be the first time two nations went to war over pretty women, would it, Mr. Ambassador?”

“It certainly wouldn’t,” said Federer, clutching his pills as they rushed into the meeting.

THE DIVISION WAS ABOUT EQUAL between uniforms and civilian, thought Federer as everyone scurried to take their place. Tricia Slocum, the Undersecretary of State for Far Eastern Affairs, had flown in from Washington. Federer recognized Daniel Inouye IV, the Governor of Hawaii, from a photograph. The only person he couldn’t identify was a little roly-poly Hawaiian in a flowery shirt seated near the door.

“Alright, let’s get started,” said Schoonmaker, calling things to order. A brittle silence descended on the room.

“This is our the honorable Samuel Federer, our Ambassador to China. He’ll be meeting with a Chinese delegation in a few days. He wants to be briefed as thoroughly as possible. General Borlander, would you start?” He turned to a lean, tanned officer beside him.

“Yes, sir,” said Borlander, lining up his i-World. He had the look of a scarab beetle baked too long in the sun

“Mr. Ambassador, before you begin,” interrupted a roly-poly Hawaiian. “Can I say something?”

“Who is this?” Federer whispered to General Schoonmaker.

“Viscanu Garawalawall, the Mayor of Honolulu,” Schoonmaker whispered back. “He practically clawed his way into the room.”

“Mr. Mayor, we’ll hear from you later.”

“Yes, but I just want to tell the Ambassador,” continued the Mayor, “the people of Hawaii are loyal citizens of the United States. We are completely opposed to this action. Many of us have Chinese heritage, but we in no way approve of this despicable invasion by foreigners.”

“We’re confident of your loyalty,” said Federer, trying to return to the matter at hand. “The Hawaiian people are more at risk than anyone right now. But I’d like to hear from the military first.”

“Now this business of Polynesian independence,” continued the Mayor as if nothing had happened. “We want no part of it. This is something thought up at the university.”

“Excuse me, Mr. Ambassador,” said Anderson. “The leader of the Polynesian Independence Movement will be here in a moment. They’re bringing him over now.”

“Alright, let’s talk about this when he arrives,” said Federer.