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Ben Stein's Diary
The Speech Obama Failed to Deliver
A return to L.A. coincides with a growing sense of doom.
Friday
I keep thinking about our man, Barack Obama, and especially about
his promises in 2008. There have been many Presidents. But has any
President ever had a wider gulf between what he promised he would
do and what he actually did or did not do?
What if, at his momentous moment at Grant Park in Chicago on the night of his win, he had said this speech:
“Now, friends, thank you for electing me. To tell you the truth, I am a good speaker as long as I have a prompter in front of me. But I have absolutely no clue at all as to how to get us out of this recession. None at all. I will, however, spend the money of the people who pay taxes to give out a lot of money to people who are either union members or do not pay taxes. I will spend a trillion dollars in a year and I have no idea of what, if any good it will do.
“I’ll also get my captive Congress, led by the most pitifully weak Speaker ever, and a man who gives the word ‘party hack’ a bad name, to pass a health care bill that will dramatically raise taxes, cut Medicare payments, cram patients into doctors’ offices, create complete chaos — and I will do it in the dead of night without even showing the Republicans what’s in the bill. I won’t show anyone else either! That’s the gag! We’ll be passing a bill that will cost trillions and NO ONE will know what’s in it! NOT EVEN ME!!!! “They didn’t call me ‘Good time Barry’ at Punahou for nothing!
“Plus, you know how we have only one reliable ally in the whole world, and that’s Israel, probably the most militarily significant power after us, Russia, and China? Yes, the Israel that’s the only democracy in the Middle East, where Arabs have more rights than they do in any Arab country? We’re going to take that country’s premier and HUMILIATE the SOB right outside my office, make him cool his heels like a job seeker at a union hall and then I’ll tell him what a loser he is!
“That’s how I’ll show my Jewish friends what I think about Israel.
“Then, Britain? That ‘special relationship’ country? I’ll humiliate them, too. I think I’ll just hug the Queen like she’s my Mom. Then when they give me a magnificent gift, I’ll give them a CD of my speeches — in a plastic box.
“And the deficit? I’ll double it in three and a half years. With nothing to show for it.
“Plus, if we find Osama bin Laden, I think I’ll have the SEALs take all of the risks and then I’ll go on TV and pretend I did it all myself.
“Plus, did you see about those thugs who threatened anyone who didn’t vote for me at some polling place somewhere? I am not going to prosecute them at all. Not one bit. Not even for a second! What are friends for?
“Well, anyway, it’s late, so let’s PARTAY HEARTAY!”
He didn’t give that speech. Too bad.
Saturday
Now, this has been a difficult
day. I have some kind of deep fatigue, probably from travel. I
spent most of the day in bed in my office with my Julie Goodgirl
next to me. I just listened to a Mozart disc over and over again.
Piano concertos. Just great magical stuff. How can anyone be that
brilliant?
Then, I worked on my endless filing of material for my income tax. I looked at checks (cancelled checks). As always, they make me sick because I make myself sick with my extravagance. It is just a miracle that I am not destitute. However, I have been thinking that I will soon be destitute for decades so maybe something is wrong with my thinking. Or maybe God always saves me, so far.
My son and his staggeringly beautiful wife and our stunning little granddaughter, the Coco Puff, came over. Kitty, the daughter-in-law, helped my wife to file. That was a completely wasted exercise since I will never look at the files, as I told them both, but I guess it made my wife feel good to do it.
About the Author
Ben Stein is a writer, actor, economist, and lawyer living in Beverly Hills and Malibu. He writes “Ben Stein’s Diary” for every issue of The American Spectator.
Letter to the Editor View all comments (39) | Leave a comment
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Appleby| 8.27.12 @ 6:47AM
I read the first pages, and I get the drift: Obama sucks, you're still rich and critical of loudmouthed people who invade your favourite rich guy places, and you still think if only everybody else were impovrished by taxes (apparently you intend to spend all your money yourself, as the mention of reviewing your cheques doesn't mention the generous contribution you voluntarily sent to pay down the National Debt) what a wonderful world this would be. I suppose it's a habit by now.
R Martin| 8.27.12 @ 8:22AM
Yes, I got the drift of the first pages, too. It’s the rest that left me confused, particularly the end. Mr. Stein has a pal, J, who is terrified about money, yet her 87 year old mother who, Mr. Stein thinks, should be blessed by God is spending a lot of it remodeling her house. And Mr. Stein thinks the rest of us are doomed. What in the world does that mean?
However, there was some new ground in this piece. It included the first mention of a female who is not staggeringly beautiful.
PolishKnight| 8.27.12 @ 9:59AM
You gals and guys are tough on Ben. It's a diary after all. He's giving us his honest opinion of his day. By honest, it doesn't mean correct or truthful or even right. It's his perspective.
It would be neat if others did the same, especially on the left, and allowed us to see what goes on in their heads. I'd love to see a diary from Bill Maher or Steven Spielberg. But I doubt they would be prepared to do something like that since they only want to share their lifeview, in snippets, with their closest friends and allies.
TLP| 8.27.12 @ 5:38PM
He's Boring.
Other than that?
He's a great guy.
Alan Obama Fan Brooks | 8.27.12 @ 10:12AM
"But has any President ever had a wider gulf between what he promised he would do and what he actually did or did not do?"
Buchanan failed to prevent the Civil War.
FDR lied about everything.
Nixon failed to complete the second term he promised to complete ("I am not a quitter").
Bush 41 said read his lips no new taxes.
PolishKnight| 8.27.12 @ 10:45AM
One of the things I most like about my "team" (other than there simply is no place for me in the Democrat party other than as a useful idiot) is that conservatives have turned on their presidents, openly, when they were lied to such as "no new taxes".
In a manner of speaking, then, most Democrats are useful idiots. Unless they're a party crony or getting kickbacks or living on welfare, they have no interest in voting Democrat other than because their grandparents voted for FDR or they feel a need to belong to their Democrat special interest group constituency.
Alan Obama Fan Brooks | 8.27.12 @ 11:13AM
Another reason: they think unless prodded, the GOP will continue to run and elect 2nd rate presidential candidates-- as it has consistently done since 1988.
Romney is a 2nd rate candidate, is only in the running because his father was an important guy who was a primary contender in '68.
PolishKnight| 8.27.12 @ 3:17PM
I'm chuckling that the left's list of candidates isn't very distinguished either: A former peanut farmer party hack. A northeast effeminate liberal who tried to show how "butch" he was compared to Reagan by riding in a tank. A corrupt, almost third world bad-boy charmer whose success happened to be that he was more committed to sexual dalliances in the oval office rather than pushing a failed marxist agenda (Hmmm, in some ways, perhaps that's the best guy we could get for the office!). Continuing on, a nutcase global warming believer who gets a nobel prize. Then a slimy Vietnam vet who got out after 3 minor injuries and called his fellow vets war criminals and then ran on a war hero record and his VP was a sleazy trial lawyer. That last one says it all, doesn't it?
The left is in love with politics and "cool" factor but they haven't had a cool guy since JFK which is why they still have a hard on for him 50 years later. Their beloved marxism is now irrelevant since Obamanomics is about crony fascism and capitalism, not marxism. His wife's hospital administration buddies are going to pocket billions while shoving senior citizens into soylent green machines. What's really to love about being a leftist nowadays?
Tom Kyba| 8.27.12 @ 11:39AM
That one doesn't even merit points for effort.
Occam's Tool| 8.28.12 @ 3:53PM
I don't understand Ben's position on Taxes, but the speech is right on.
Bill Hussein O'Stalin| 8.27.12 @ 7:52AM
Most Americans don't have envy of the rich like they do in most of the economically failed European socialist modeled economies. There was a poll in the Hill that showed over 75% of the public felt the rich should pay lower taxes.
Mr. Stein, if you have a wife who doesn't nag you, you are incredibly rich. Most wives feel it is their sworn duty to nag their husbands 24/7. So if you are un-nagged you are wealthy beyond your dreams.
Proverbs 31:10 Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies.
TLP| 8.27.12 @ 8:03AM
That article made me Constipated.
Quiet Class, while I take attendance.
Stein? Ben Stein? A Good Article from Ben Stein?
Has anyone seen a Good Article from Ben Stein?
An Interesting Article from Ben Stein?
Is there an Interesting Article out there, by Ben Stein?
Has anyone seen an Interesting Article from Ben Stein?
And, why aren't all of these Cliffhanger Stories being put on Audio for the Sleep Deprived who can't afford a Sleep Number Bed?
Bob Grant| 8.27.12 @ 9:45AM
Come on, don't you want to read more about the staggeringly beautiful women he comes in contact with, or spots while he's having his car washed, or stares down while eating a Reuben?
TLP| 8.27.12 @ 5:41PM
Since you brought it up?
I wanna know what he's thinking when he's sitting on the Gas Station Mens Room Toilet, and halfway through, he realizes that there's no toilet paper on the roll.
Now, THAT would be a Story.
Gary B| 8.27.12 @ 9:37PM
LOL
Louis Jenkins| 8.27.12 @ 8:40AM
Ben, you almost got me going there about Obama's speech. In fact, it was kind of interesting and humorous. They you dropped the ball. Keep working at it Ben, you'll be a barn burning essayist yet, with time.
Ian Cognito | 8.27.12 @ 8:51AM
Ben, you are stuck in the past with your institutionalized & racist IQ "Laws". You also reveal your enmity towards minorities and The Stupid - who do not test well on IQ tests. Everyone knows IQ tests are culturally biased - particularly the math portion. You obviously think counting, adding and subtracting - all that stuff you and your ilk use to make our Dear Leader look incompetent - was used by all cultures. It wasn't! Only elitist, smarty pants countries who need math to make themselves look superior, by exposing the dumbness of other cultures relied upon math. Don't get me started on the verbals and history portions of those IQ tests. Just because a child is raised in a country and the questions are limited to that country - doesn't mean that child can be expected to know about it. Language? That is the most insulting part. Everyone knows Ebonics and other multi-cultural dialects are valid alternatives to your King's English. They add to the Rich Fabric that holds our nation together. But people like you are obsessed with absolutes - only one answer out of many. That too is exclusive... and hurtful. It's little wonder why people like you form Laws - to impugn the smartness of others who were not afforded all the economic advantages most Jews like you enjoy. It's time you began to expand your unenlightened views and open your closed mind to the possibilities available when a student merely finishes the exam. Isn't that worth anything to you?
C. Vernon Crisler | 8.27.12 @ 9:26AM
What does this have to do with what Ben wrote?
Skippy| 8.27.12 @ 1:57PM
Zero.
It was simply a chance to justify ignorance, elevate lawlessness and skewer Jews.
Ian Cognito | 8.28.12 @ 2:04PM
It was a response to the disjointed format - and I'm sure Ben gets the Jew reference - since it is a Liberal staple
JimH| 8.27.12 @ 11:07AM
Per the latest executive order from the White House, all schools receiving Federal aid will henceforth teach arithmetic in such a manner as to confine themselves to a system consisting of one, two, three, and many. This numbering system is deemed sufficient for most people and does not cause feelings of inferiority by those unable to comprehend systems with numbers beyond this range.
Bob Grant| 8.27.12 @ 9:01AM
Come on folks, lighten up. After all, the series is titled Ben Stein's Diary!!!
The banality is my issue with it. I mean, when does he NOT see a staggeringly beautiful woman at the upscale grocery store he frequents? ...or one passing by the window of the restaurant where he's eating? ...or at the upscale car wash? ...
Moreover, we GET that he has a alot of "dear friends" who helped him at certain times of his life. This is par for the course of someone who has made it.
In the end, these stories all seem very familiar if you enjoy Curb Your Enthusiasm or Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee.
Ian Cognito | 8.28.12 @ 2:06PM
"he has a alot of "dear friends" who helped him at certain times of his life." Do you mean Ben didn't EARN it?
gene| 8.27.12 @ 9:54AM
Enough about the Obama Weinie!
When Richard Nixon was in office, Russia was terrified of China's Nuclear Program, to the point that they were going to make a pre-emtive attack with their nukes and knock out China's Nuke capability. The only problem was that Clinton was not yet President and had not yet sold them all the technology they needed for accuracy. To make up for the lack of accuracy, they loaded their missiles with tremendous 20 MEGATON warheads that could vaporize millions.
When President Nixon got wind of this? He brought the Russian Ambassador to the White House by the back door to keep it unofficial. the message?, "You nuke China and we will nuke you; all out war". Russia backed down. This was kept CLASSIFIED for decades. NO ONEW knew about it publically.
IF something like this happened today? Front Page headlines six inches high!:
"Pres. Obama the Messiah saves hundreds of Millions of Chinese!"
"LOOK at this President! A real leader, a real tough Hombre!"
"Who says that Democrats are not tough? Are not leaders?"
They would have put this on the front pages for weeks, if not months. They would have had parades with confetti.
They would have 24/7 smashed this into the face of every Republican non-stop.
They would have pushed for awards.
They would have been relentless in their ranting, posturing, backslapping, glad-handling, yelling, bragging, on and on and on and on.
They know nothing of real leadership.
JohnInFlorida| 8.27.12 @ 9:59AM
Ya'kno, I stopped reading Ben's writings quite a while ago but I still come here to read the comments. You guys never disappoint me and continue to support my decision to not read Ben's column. Thank you muchly!
PolishKnight| 8.27.12 @ 10:56AM
Ben's column reminds me of beers I have out with my friends because they say much the same things and I'll admit it, I enjoy it.
In normal editorials or even comments, people are concerned about their street cred. They have a position they're debating so they (properly) watch what they say. Ben is just musing and this is what humans are really like. Most of you are not the serious folks that you present yourselves as in the comments.
TeaPartyNow| 8.27.12 @ 10:42AM
I still think it's delightfully sweet. Obama ran on a welfare carrot last time, romney is running on a crony capitalist carrot this time. Neither one of them will take us out of our steep decline. The question is (for your worries about money) why will cause less steep of a decline, obama or romney? I say obama. Because both will keep the status quo. But only romney will raise spending on things that we don't need, over and above what we are already spending, because he's "our" guy and we'll let him.
I'm glad to know that the woman in the end did not die the way most Jews did in the Holocaust. But these days, they do everything that they did to Jews (make abuse legal by written laws) yet we are stuck in perpetual work camps with no hope for a speedy death. Did you know that they slaved Jews, to build everything, while they were killing them, and taking everything that they owned? Same thing today, minus only the concentration camps. And the right is taking us further down today, not back up like some on the right suppose.
Thank you Ben. But my diaries would never be as light hearted as any Jewish diary. Ever read Moshe Flinkers diary? "We Are Witnesses" five diaries of teenagers who died in the Holocaust, there are some good stories that aught not to go unread.
Denver Todd| 8.27.12 @ 11:06AM
I don't know why Stein bothers with all the checks and filing and stuff. A qualified bookkeeper and accountant would do wonders for simplifying his life.
Notary Sojac| 8.27.12 @ 12:46PM
Hey Ben:
If my most notable artistic accomplishment was saying "Bueller? Bueller????" in a second-tier Hollywood comedy, I'd be inclined to steer clear of the cheap shots at the likes of T.S. Eliot.
PolishKnight| 8.27.12 @ 2:32PM
Is there a first tier Hollywood comedy?!?!
Bill8472| 8.27.12 @ 3:26PM
Eliot was a great poet but a near-total failure as a man. Vivienne Eliot was no prize as a wife, but when she went into the insane asylum, he hardly visited. Pretty chintzy. She was in there for 8 years before she died. Alone.
Mistral| 8.27.12 @ 4:13PM
Frankly speaking, while I do not like or trust Hussein Obama, this piece here is absolute rubbish and not worthy of being called journalism.
Kingofthenet| 8.27.12 @ 6:45PM
Me thinks Ben needs a new squeeze, or another Ferris's day off.
Mimi | 8.27.12 @ 8:15PM
Ben ...We have enough of drib-drab of our own!
The "O" speech had a twist but it entertained.
I like the scenery articles better than plain old..Plain old, DRIB-DRAB!
Gary B| 8.27.12 @ 9:42PM
L.A. has the most beautiful women in the world. I wish Ben would start carrying a camera.
PolishKnight| 8.27.12 @ 10:22PM
Stein doesn't spent time in "L.A." He lives in Malibu and perhaps goes to West Hollywood. Driving around metro Los Angeles, I saw garbage cans with fires in them and homeless huddled around and it looked little different than Newark except for the splendid weather.
Brian Richard Allen | 8.30.12 @ 2:37AM
.... we have only one reliable ally in the whole world, and that's Israel ....
Close -- but no Christmas Box. [Forgive me? B)]
Don't forget our first and best cousins, the Australians.
(The most worthy of allies, ever at our shoulders and/or with our sixes, less only the short hiccough the Aussies' Obama-styled Maoist traitor: the eerily- similarly-fascistic Gough Whitlam -- and his criminal gang "government" -- effected during his short-lived Vietnam-era sabotage)
Brian Richard Allen | 8.30.12 @ 3:03AM
.... I was up most of the night from my Thai food ....
Fair go, Khun Stein khrap!
First missing the Aussies from the list of reliable allies of which they comprise 50% -- and then blaming the effect of a single restaurant on the Thai Nation. Which, (check out the Vietnam era and the Treaties of Amity and Commerce of 1833 and of Amity and Economic Relations of 1966)
Thai food is close to being the best the world has to offer, Khun Stein khrap -- but some care and responsibility is called for when you are choosing your restaurant, khrap.
Kh'apom?
Brian Richard Allen | 9.13.12 @ 4:48PM
.... G-d save us ....
Fair go, Doctor Stein, even the G-d of Israel helps only those who help themselves and after 3 years 237 days 4 hours and 40-odd minutes -- but who's counting -- there are so many on the dole in one way or another I am no longer at all sure we can raise a quorum of those willing and/or able to help themselves.
But, let's pray and trust, from your lips to G-d's Good ear!
Eh?