A solution to the Secret Service scandal.
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Well, I just might have the perfect solution for this whole mess, a single step that satisfies all four of the aforementioned rules concurrently, a fix that that doesn’t blow a hole in the deficit and doesn’t require a change in human nature.
It just so happened that the Palms Casino and Resort in Las Vegas, simultaneously with the breaking news of the Colombia scandal, announced that it was closing the last remaining Playboy Club in the United States.
And so, as with construction workers being idled coast-to-coast by unemployment, we now have a nationwide problem of jobless Bunnies, entire colonies being tossed aside by the closing of clubs in New York, Los Angeles, Detroit, San Francisco, Phoenix, Kansas City, St. Louis, Atlanta and Chicago — and now Las Vegas.
That’s it, obviously — hire the jobless Bunnies as chaperones – ears, tail and all – and Bingo!, domestic unemployment is cut, and it’s early to bed for the agents, with no need to go out boozing all night at racy bars, no need to drag a foreign security risk back to the hotel room at 3 a.m.