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Last Call
My NASCAR Buddy
A weekend at the races with Christopher Hitchens.
Christopher Hitchens. No matter how one felt about him it’s impossible to forget him. Everyone remembers his eloquent yet venomous writings on subjects ranging from Mother Teresa to Bill Clinton to the anti-Iraq War left to God himself. Then there was his personality, which really was larger than life. “Did anyone who writes in Britain or America not drink with Hitchens (—or worse)?” David Zincavage asked in his blog “Never Yet Melted.”
Count me among those who did. But I am also fortunate to have a memory of Hitchens that virtually no one else has. In 2005, he was my companion for an unforgettable weekend at the NASCAR races.
I’d first met him at a book party in 2000. Shunned by his friends on the left for telling the truth about Clinton flack Sidney Blumenthal’s smear campaign against Monica Lewinsky, he was welcomed with open arms by many on the right. So he began to attend conservative events, particularly ones with open bars (as do most of us scribes, of all persuasions).
As a young journalist who had always admired his literary gifts, I was nervous but forced myself to make conversation with him. Trying to say something he hadn’t heard before, I suggested, “If you really want to see a piece of Americana, you have to go to a NASCAR race.” He laughed it off but was very gracious. As Victor Davis Hanson put it, “For a supposedly mean person, he could be awfully kind.”
After that, whenever I saw him, I would say, “When are we going to go to that NASCAR race?” It was a standing joke until five years later, when Hitchens replied, “Make the arrangements and we’ll go.”
Vanity Fair had assigned him to do a series on “red state” America, and NASCAR would certainly fit the bill. So we could go there for the weekend, on VF’s tab. Having written a few stories on NASCAR, I called its media office, got credentials, and we were off.
On a Friday, I picked Hitchens up at his book-lined apartment near the Washington Hilton. He showed me around and introduced me to his lovely wife, Carol. Then we were off in my 2004 Kia Amanti, barreling down I-95 to the Richmond International Raceway.
Over the weekend, I absorbed many facets of his personality. He was mostly kind, sometimes exasperating, but always stimulating. The most interesting anecdotes concern his legendary smoking habit.
As we were driving, I said, “You can smoke if you want.” He said courteously, “Oh, is that okay?” I said, “Sure, get it out of your system now, because you can’t have a cigarette when we’re anywhere near the track tonight.” I explained further that the infield media center was smack inside the circular race track, within inches of “Pit Road,” where drivers refuel. There are open containers of gasoline, which spill on the ground. Hitchens nodded in seeming understanding of this safety issue.
When we went to the race that night, Hitchens had what I later learned was his trademark whiskey flask around his neck. There were rules against bringing in alcohol, but no one questioned him, maybe because they thought it was water. A local sportswriter named Jerry Reid recognized him instantly and showed us around, introducing us to the drivers. Things seemed to be going great.
Then I noticed Hitchens leaning up against the fence that separated us from the track. I wondered if he was taking a closer look at the cars whizzing by. But no, that’s not what he was doing. He was sneaking a cigarette! I wanted to scream at him. But then I thought, better not. It could startle him into dropping the cigarette, and the whole raceway would go up in flames.
The raceway survived. The next day we saw some historical sites, then retired to the bar at the ornate Jefferson Hotel, where he seemed most at ease. We discussed everything from Iraq to Thomas Jefferson to Charles Dickens to country music (some of which he was a fan of). I don’t remember who won the races, but I’ll always remember my weekend with this remarkable man.
About the Author
John Berlau is Senior Fellow for Finance and Access to Capital at the Competitive Enterprise Institute and blogs at OpenMarket.org.
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Frank Drackman| 3.21.12 @ 6:50AM
Finally, a forum to pose the question thats bothered me for the last 30 years...
HOW DID PETE ROSE JR GET TO PLAY IN A MAJOR LEAGUE GAME???
Which is a bigger crime than anything Charlie Hustle ever did.
THE MAN PLAYED ALL 11 INNINGS OF THE 1970 ALLSTAR GAME, AND BROKE RAY FOSSE'S CLAVICLE TO SCORE THE WINNING RUN!
Todays players take a 2 minute break after every pitch, and thats just during the Home Run Derby.
I mean at least Racing's "Junior" has some talent.
OK, no he doesn't.
OK, WHY CAN'T STOCK CAR RACING USE REAL STOCK CARS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Sure back in the 80's you'd have been stuck with Turbo Trans-Ams barely able to break 100, but now even a V-6 Mustang will go 150,
Picture the final turn of the REAL best race, Talladega, with Hemi-Chargers/Boss Mustangs/Camaros bumper to bumper, the Hondas/Accuras having all crashed and burned earlier.
What the hell models are they even supposed to be driving today?
in 1974 NASCAR drivers drove Malibu's just like my Mom, they even looked like my Mom's.
The Malibus, not the Drivers.
Of Course you only got to watch maybe 20 minutes of the Daytona 500, on Wild World of Sports, and thats only if that Crashing Ski-Jumper guy finished early.
Frank
Moe Blotz| 3.21.12 @ 7:44AM
Vinko Bogataj was the Slovak who crashed into the side of the ski jump on Wide World of Sports and he is still alive. As far as Jr., he has won the Daytona 500 and a couple races at Eastabooga. Some talent he has when leading. Stock cars in NASCAR were based on showroom models sixty years ago, but the tin knockers changed all that when Henry Yunick downsized a 1966 Chevelle that still fit the official templates. Sheet metal in your "stock" 1974 Monte Carlo was acid dipped and lightened the body weight so that car builders could add weight to meet the minimum at a lower point in the car's chassis. In the mid 1990s NASCAR became a spec series with decals slapped on the bodies to differentiate the brands. The only difference beneath the body panels is the engine, based on the manufacturer's design. For some excellent insight about NASCAR, read "The World According to Smokey" from Carbon Press.
Frank Drackman| 3.21.12 @ 8:47AM
CORRECTION:
the 1970 MLB Allstar game lasted 12 Innings, not 11.
Charlie Hustle didn't come in until the 6th, probably too busy trying to find something to bet on...
President Nixon through out TWO first pitches, one to the starting catcher of each league.
What a Douche'.
12 Innings, 10 pitching changes, Little-Leage-Everybody-Plays-Rules, and still the game only lasted a little over 3 hours. Thats the 7th Inning stretch in todays Baton Deach March Bore-a-thons.
Frank
SUBVET| 3.21.12 @ 10:41AM
Hey....Frank NA$CAR is a show and don't forget it. Racing is passing not follow the leader.
Moe Blotz| 3.21.12 @ 8:49PM
Frank is just envious of guys who speak with a southern twang and drive saloon cars at 200+ MPH. (At least most of them used to).
Appleby| 3.21.12 @ 7:05AM
What a waste of space! Essentially this article says, "We went to a NA$CAR race, my companion drank and smoked -- both against the rules, and the smoking so dangerous that even at Le Mans it will get the French thrown out of the grandstands (not literally, although when you come back from the washroom and find a Frenchman in your seat pretending he can't understand your English, the latter becomes a distinct possibility), and then you went home?
And they PAID you for this?
Good grief, I could write a better article at 2:00 a.m. in the back corner of the paddock of any race track in America.
Mac Jehoff| 3.21.12 @ 7:51AM
Lighten up Madame, obviously Mr. Terrell needed space filler today. The smoking bans at race tracks has nowt to do with safety, it is PC enforcement. You could throw a lit cigarette into a pan of gasoline and the butt would go out. Light a match near the fumes and you would have a fireball to deal with. The late Mr.Hitchens sneaking a fag to satisfy his addiction was a danger to no one.
Chris C| 3.21.12 @ 2:49PM
You are absolutely right. When I was racing, nobody ever gave a thought to leaving the paddock to light up. Just don't do it in the garage or in pit lane, where you should be working anyway and not taking smoke breaks. I've smoked in paddocks at race tracks all over the US, mostly road courses, and I've never seen tobacco cause a fire at any of them.
Appleby| 3.21.12 @ 4:20PM
However, smoking in the grandstands at Le Mans, even if you are French, will get you thrown out, because of the risk of dropping lighted cigaretets or embers over the wall into the pitlane where they could go down somebody's coverall neck and cause a mighty rucus...and in the paddock, the drivers still sneak smokes, but not in the garage.
Frank Drackman| 3.21.12 @ 7:46AM
@ Appleby
couldnt have said it better myself...
I mean, I smoke while pumping gas, and never caught on fire*, sneak booze into baseball games, and no fancy writer sucks my posthumorous member.
And as much as they deny it, NASCAR is Socialism at its worse...
99.9% White, and spends all its efforts tryin to make everyone the same, its like the worst of Pete Rozelle/NCAA Basketball distilled into tax free corn licker.
This ia AMERICA dammit, we love to beat people with overwhelming force, and I'll take the 75' Reds over the 73' Mets anyday.
Frank
Moe Blotz| 3.21.12 @ 7:57AM
NASCAR is a private enterprise run by the France family and if you have enough money to enter, you can buy a franchise and go racing. How is that socialism? NASCAR has had teams featuring melanin enhanced participants with the most successful being Wendell Scott. The France family even sponsors talent searches in the big cities trying to find more blokes like Mr. Scott, but they are not working out at the top tier. Maybe NASCAR executives could entice Lewis Hamilton to go roundy round racing after his F1 career ends, but then he is not African-American.
Frank Drackman| 3.21.12 @ 8:16AM
THATs your problem,
anythang involving France for one.
Except French Tickers.
And Fries, Toast, Kisses...
You can keep your French Roast though.
And I like the �.9 White thing, hey if it's OK for the (Insert down-trodden Ethnic/Sexual Orientation/Disability Group here) its OK for my 1/2 Jewish Cracker Ass.
And if your so into Reverse Discrimination, how bout offerin me a ride?
How bout the "Jew Canoe"? Which is what I used to call my 78' Ex-Georgia State Patrol LTD with the 460, and Vacuum Canister the size of a 2 lb Luzianne(Get Mr. France to tell you) Can...
Seriously,5 minutes of one of those "Fast & Furious" movies has more entertainment than the last decade of NASCAR...
Frank
Frank
Con Chef (NB) | 3.21.12 @ 2:44PM
Moe:
I'd LOVE to see Hamilton in a stock car! I love it when open wheel drivers make the transition. Its TOTALLY different racing. 42 other cars on a track makes for interesting racing for people who've come from F1 or Indy. I like Juan Pablo Montoya, & did from the moment he got to NASCAR. And he's come along rather nicely. I actually see him winning a race OTHER than a road course this year. Marcos Ambrose is another open wheel guy who's come along nicely.
And lest people forget, Tony Stewart & Jimmi Johnson ALSO came from open wheel backgrounds. To me, people who can make the switch, & be successful are truly great drivers.
Appleby| 3.21.12 @ 4:21PM
Lewis Hamilton and Tony Stewart exchanged cars at Watkins Glen last summer; you can see it on an episode of "Trading Paint" on Speed Channel, or possibly seek it out on YouTube. Both were quite good in the other guy's car.
Moe Blotz| 3.21.12 @ 8:56PM
Marcos Ambrose raced in Australia's saloon car series before landing in NASCAR. The Aussies drive on their ovals clockwise, just the opposite of our oval tracks, and their steering wheels are located on the right. The best drivers can drive anything with wheels on it and do it well. Ayrton Senna was one of them.
Michelle| 3.21.12 @ 9:47AM
Agree Appleby! Did Mr. Hitchens write an article?? (that could have been referenced)...Was he overwhelmed at 43 cars coming to the start after a rousing performance of the anthem and a flyover!!?? Did he meet any drivers? Opinions/impressions of the fans??
My 6yr old could have written a better story. Geesh.
Frank Drackman| 3.21.12 @ 10:06AM
And what was Hitches always so dour and pissed-off-looking about?
And don't tell me "Esophageal Cancer", Ann Richards had it to, and she never got all sour-lemon-facey.
I know, Happy Drunk/Mean Drunk
Frank
bill glass| 3.21.12 @ 10:28AM
My thoughts were that I wanted more on Hitch. Please ignore the above... and rest assured, your article was greatly appreciated.
Con Chef (NB) | 3.21.12 @ 11:48AM
Aw hell. I see all the Junior doubters are out in full force. Junior will be fine. He's got Gordon's old crew chief this season (Steve LeTarte). He had a great finish at Daytona & a fair finish at Bristol last week. This week is Richmond, another short track, like Bristol. And I expect him to do well again.
I look at being a Junior fan as I do being a Cubs fan. I don't hold my breath, but I see glimpses of hope. The kid CAN WIN RACES. He's just not his daddy. And the sooner people realize that, the better they'll understand him. I don't envy him one bit. Those are some tough shoes to fill. He'll be fine in the end, though. If not as a driver, then certainly as a team owner.
Appleby| 3.21.12 @ 4:25PM
"Junior" nearly became a soprano at Laguna Seca a couple of years ago when he was invited to drive a Corvette in an ALMS road race. Apparently in NA$CAR one was at that time not required to wear Nomex underwear if one was in "just a practice" so Junior left his in the trailer...he tankslapped the Corvette and it burst into flames; Junior was hauled out by a Marshall and taken to the hospital in great secrecy, where some other driver let slip where the burns had occurred. Unlike his father, you can't tell Junior a thing; however, I daresay he wears his Nomex to bed at night after that.
There, that was a better piece than this guy got paid to write!
Con Chef (NB) | 3.21.12 @ 9:49PM
Didn't know THAT one. Well, here's hoping the Earhardt legacy machine is still intact!
Paul McGrath| 3.21.12 @ 2:34PM
I pretty much got zero out of this article. No insight into Hitchens; no insight into car racing. Nada.
Anthony M| 3.21.12 @ 9:19PM
Little crissie hitchens was a jerk who kissed up to any wealthy person who would pay to read his drivel. The problem is that he hung around with a bunch of sissified wannabe elites who thought smoking and sneaking a drink made him "cool". A grown man sneaking a smoke or a drink is a jerk, dead or not.
Mike w| 3.21.12 @ 9:58PM
Why the waste of space on this left wing turd? I have already happily forgotten him
Mike w| 3.21.12 @ 9:58PM
Why the waste of space on this left wing turd? I have already happily forgotten him
Kingofthenet| 3.22.12 @ 3:14PM
Christopher was one of a kind, but i think his biggest mistake was NEVER to admit he was wrong.
Jack L in Phoenix| 3.29.12 @ 12:08AM
Hey John! Good on you, man. Persistence sometimes pays off (other times it gets you dismissed as a crank and people run in the opposite direction when they see you coming.) I would have loved to see how the beautiful noise of NASCAR affected Hitchens' delicate ears. That's what got me the first time I went to NASCAR. The noise of a pack of full-throated race cars roaring around a turn is enough to frighten any adult. Anyone who says the noise didn't scare them the first time is lying. I envy you. It would have been so great to hang out with Hitchens. I think I'm smart, but I'm smart enough to understand I don't know shinola next to Hitchens. So I'd play the kind interlocutor, waiter and solicitous host. And I'd listen and try to remember something of what he said. I'm 64 and the ol' memory tapes are a little frayed. Anyway, cool story.
Jack Lavelle - Phoenix - laeva65@gmail.com