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Ben Stein's Diary

Before Sunset

Our monthly Diarist’s print magazine installment.

(Page 2 of 3)

By the way, a soldier who sat next to us on SW said the food in Afghanistan on his base is superb. On Sundays they get steak and lobster. Pretty good. They deserve it.

My wife and I were all teary until we got into our rented Caddy and headed out of the airport. Ooops. The government is doing work on the highway and many lanes were constricted to one. It was one of the worst traffic jams I have ever seen in Spokane—after midnight. I was really furious, especially because I did not see one single solitary workman.

Long ago, Joan Didion wrote a piece on Caltrans, the road repair entity in California. She wanted to find out why they scheduled work so as to cause such terrible traffic jams. She went down to the headquarters of Caltrans and asked about it, and what they basically answered was, “We don’t give a damn about what happens to the motorists. We do what’s easiest for us as bureaucrats.”

So there you have it. The best of the government — the soldiers doing their brave duty. The worst of government — the bureaucrats screwing up our lives by just doing what’s easiest for them.

It took an hour to get through the traffic and zip along to Coeur d’Alene, and thence up Highway 95 to glorious Sandpoint. By the time we got to town, it was two a.m. Alex was suffering from sore throat pain so we went to the Dairy Depot and bought her three huckleberry milkshakes. It was amazing to behold the parade of beer buyers trying to beat the two a.m. cut-off point. Back at our little condo, Mr. Buffett’s trains went roaring by. The news on TV was all about a hurricane approaching D.C. and New York. I am worried about Wlady, Bob, Russ, Chris DeMuth, Bob Noah, my niece, her family, my super great sister and her family. Worried about them all. I lay in bed for a long time listening to the trains. I love it here in Idaho. But then I love everywhere in America. Not equally, though.

SATURDAY
I slept very late, again. This is getting to be a curse—staying up late and sleeping late.

I kept thinking about something terribly upsetting that I had seen on C-Span a couple of days ago. The Congressional Black Caucus was having a meeting to discuss the recession and black people. The moderator of the panel of black legislators in Congress asked my neighbor, Rep. Maxine Waters, what she would tell black poor people to do in the recession.

Now, let me tell you first of all that I have a complex relation with Rep. Waters. She and I argued vigorously long years ago about mandatory cross-town busing in Los Angeles. She was for it. I was against it. I said it would wreck the schools. Despite the wishes of the voters, judges forced busing down the city’s throat. The schools are a shadow of their former selves. Was it because of busing? I would say “partly” but not entirely. So I have been unhappy about Ms. Waters for some years.

On the other hand, she stood up to Goldman Sachs at many hearings and would often be the only one in the room to take them to task and I admire her for that.

However, at this C-Span event, as noted, she was asked what she would tell poor black people in the recession (or the slow recovery) to do to help themselves. Her suggestion was to organize themselves and demand that government save them and give them money and jobs. (I am paraphrasing here…this was the gist of Rep. Waters’ suggestions, not her exact words.)

I found her disturbing. My idea of a good answer would be, (1) Acquire useful skills like math or languages or plumbing or anything people need, (2) Learn and execute great work habits so that when employers are hiring, they will want you, (3) Save your money and spend carefully so you will have a reserve, (4) Limit your number of dependents to what you can actually afford to support without handouts.

But Mrs. Waters basically said, “Use your votes to make the other guy pay for your life.” At least that’s how I heard it and maybe I am wrong. But her suggestions to me were just more welfare dependence, less self-respect, less self-support. Just for me, I think many Americans are not comfortable with Ms. Waters. We want an America at work—not an America on the dole.

However, maybe I am wrong about all of this. In any event, I have control only over me. And little
enough of that.

After a restless night, I dragged my old self out of bed, ate my breakfast, shaved, got dressed, went out for a bike ride. It is too damned hot here. Way, way too hot. This is Idaho and we are at about 2500 feet, but it is too hot today. I am really hot. Plus, there seems to be a convention of Samoan martial arts people on the beach here. Their children keep running in front of my bike and it’s making me nervous. Why are we having a convention of Samoans here anyway? I like Samoans. They are incredibly brave. But this park is too small for so many of them and I don’t want to collide with their kids.

Today is my father’s birthday. I think about him constantly. What would he think of my life and my fantastic wastefulness? Actually, he would have some criticism and some praise and then he would want to talk about himself. Just the same as anyone else. My sister said I should act sensibly in honor of him. I am not sure I have any good sense left. My sister got all of the good sense. I got the anarchy. Just kidding. I miss my Pop something fierce, though. If yours is alive, be grateful every instant.

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About the Author

Ben Stein is a writer, actor, economist, and lawyer living in Beverly Hills and Malibu. He writes “Ben Stein’s Diary” for every issue of The American Spectator.

Letter to the Editor View all comments (15) |

Denver Todd| 10.31.11 @ 9:09AM

Southwest may not always have the cheapest fares, but they make up for that by having fabulous change policies and free baggage.

Humphrey Dumfries | 10.31.11 @ 9:36AM

...and certifiable flight crews... Not sure at what point singing stewardesses seemed like a good idea, but they freak me out.

Occam's Tool| 10.31.11 @ 11:10AM

Perhaps the taxes on fuel, which is all part of the higher tax regimen on everyone, especially greedy companies, is part of the reason your flight cost so much, Ben.

The purpose of taxes is to raise the money the government needs to provide appropriate services. NOTHING ELSE! Not to punish or hurt people.

sam vaughn| 10.31.11 @ 6:20PM

and what appropriate service would that be? fondling my genitals? having my luggage searched and items of interest confiscated? having my parents, in their 80's interogated because my Dad has a plate in his head courtesy Chosin, Korea?

emilio lizardo, PhD| 11.1.11 @ 9:21AM

wondering if anyone caught ol' Ben on Fox this AM (Tuesday 11/1) calling for "massive" tax increases across the board to alleviate the deficit. I suspect Ben is an economist to the same degree as he is an "actor". The ravages of his perpetual gourmand's tour and the stuffing himself with Chik-Fil-A is rotting his mind. Time to pull the plug. AMF,Ben

Peppermint Tea| 10.31.11 @ 12:31PM

Tender and touching diary, but I wonder, "Is Ben still alive or is he just a Halloween ghost viewing the world and imagining?"

Vern Crisler| 10.31.11 @ 3:02PM

SW tickets will cost more if you buy them at the airport. You've got to order them online or in advance to get better deals.

Ethnic people work at McD because the neighborhood is probably mostly ethnic, and that's who the franchisee wants to hire for their location.

Also my understanding is fast food restaurants hire mainly part time people, and therefore don't have to provide health insurance, etc.

Obviously the owners of the fast-food restaurants think part-time ethnics are a better hire than part-time high school whites, who will only work for a little while, then quit. Ethnics will stay on for a long time.

sam vaughn| 10.31.11 @ 6:11PM

Ben, thanks as always, the part about the veterans brought a tear to my eye. I stood in the airport in Charlotte recently, a small crowd had formed at the window. I peered out to see and saw a flag-draped casket descending from the rear of the plane. A small honor guard stood by and half a dozen people walked up. An officer said a few words and I saw small man, he just looked small, perhaps shrunken, grief will do that, but he straightened up as tall as he could go and saluted. The Delta ground crew stood by, some in tears. I don't know any of them but I sat down with tears in my own eyes. I goout of my way to greet soldiers in my travels, they deserve 1,000 smalls thanks from people like us.

Glen H| 10.31.11 @ 7:25PM

So what am I missing here? If you are going to schedule traffic work to inconvenience the least amount of people, wouldn't you schedule it ... after midnight?

Squiddly| 11.1.11 @ 7:48AM

The part you missed was this: "It was one of the worst traffic jams I have ever seen in Spokane--after midnight. I was really furious, especially because I did not see one single solitary workman."

Grouchy| 11.1.11 @ 1:49AM

So few comments....Ben usually get 100 s, but
maybe there's nothing controversial here..

Judy Wolfram| 11.2.11 @ 10:06AM

Thanks for your wonderful insights,Ben. I was wondering if you had any or could steer me towards commentary about Nixon invading Cambodia and whether it was a good idea. My son is writing a paper for his Honors American History Class and I wanted to give him a hand. Any books or articles we should check out?

William (Bill) Benton| 12.9.11 @ 6:50PM

Ben: I'm 80 years young & remember my stint in the Korea "police action." My son is a mechanic with south west working out of Phoenix. He's made it possible for his Mother & me to fly all over their system. I used to travel a lot on a ton of airlines when I toured my one-man show, Clarence Darrow, by David Rintells. (He wrote it when Henry Fonda commissioned it. Great writing, made me look good.) The point is, I'm not being just prejudice when I say SW beat 'em all. Enjoy your writing a lot, don't always agree with you, but like your stuff just the same. Bill Benton, Fort Collins, CO (a real GREAT place to live.)

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