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Eminentoes
Nobody Messes Like Joe
A fitting monument to a bad joke of a train rider.
If it weren’t so sad, this story from the Washington Times would be too funny. It seems that money from President Obama’s $862,000,000,000 “stimulus” bill of two years ago has been spent to upgrade the Wilmington, Del., AMTRAK station. Vice President Biden lobbied personally, we read, to get the funding for the station he has famously used ever since he was elected to the U.S. Senate in 1972. Now, AMTRAK, grateful for his support, has all on its own initiative decided to name the spruced-up station the Joseph Robinette Biden, Jr. AMTRAK station.
Well, we all wanted to know who would replace the late, beloved Robert Byrd of West Virginia as the king of pork. Now we know. Washington legend has it that Sen. Byrd modestly turned down all attempts to re-named the Mountaineer State for him. It seems the name “Byrdland” was already taken.
Now, where might this newly famous Delaware train station be located? You’ll remember the old English rhyme — “Send a Fool to Dover/He’ll come back a Fool all over.” Wrong. Joe Biden is no fool. He travels to Wilmington. So that’s where the station got named for him. He bragged that he has logged some 7,000 round trips between Wilmington and Washington.
And he travels in style. We all recall how President Obama named Biden as his “sheriff” for the gusher of stimulus spending. He memorably said Joe Biden would watch over the expenditures to make sure no funds were misspent. That’s because, the president said:
“Nobody messes with Joe!”
But the president neglected to tell us what would happen if we caught Joe messing.
“We would not be spending a penny on it today without the Recovery Act,” Mr. Biden said. “We have no time to wait. We cannot wait. That’s what the Recovery Act is about.”
So we didn’t wait. Why, if we waited, the unemployment could go as high as eight percent, Joe warned us. Currently, the jobless rate is closer to nine percent.
The Washington Times reports that the refurbishing of this particular railroad station went over budget by some $5.7 million. Leslie Paige of Citizens Against Government Waste seems not to have gotten President Obama’s order not to mess with Joe, especially while Joe was messing with our national debt. She told the Times.
“It’s an absolutely perfect monument to a guy whose entire history has been overspending and overpromising,” she said. “It would make sense [Mr. Biden’s] name would be slapped on a bloated, over-budget train station in Wilmington.”
Ah, but Leslie Paige, you don’t appreciate the historic nature of this particular AMTRAK station. Grove City College Professor Paul Kengor found this gem while sifting through ash heap of former Sen. Warren Rudman’s memoirs:
“At first, I didn’t see Joe; then I spotted him waving at me from far down the platform,” Rudman later recorded in his memoirs, Combat: Twelve Years in the U.S. Senate. “Joe had agonized over his vote for [Supreme Court Justice David Souter], and I knew how thrilled he must be. We started running through the crowd toward each other, and when we met, we embraced, laughing and crying.”
An ecstatic Biden wept tears of joy, telling Rudman over and over: “You were right about him [Souter]! … You were right!”
The two men were so jubilant, so giddy-practically dancing-that Rudman said onlookers thought they were crazy: “[B]ut we just kept laughing and yelling and hugging each other because sometimes, there are happy endings.”
Not since Napoleon met Tsar Alexander on a raft in the middle of the Niemen River had there been such an historic meeting. Or, perhaps since Lee and Grant shared a little writing table at Appomattox.
About the Author
Ken Blackwell, the former mayor of Cincinnati, Ohio is Vice Chairman of the Republican National Committee’s Platform Committee. He also serves on the boards of the Club For Growth and the National Taxpayers Union.
Letter to the Editor View all comments (30) | Leave a comment
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Robbins Mitchell| 3.22.11 @ 6:18AM
EVERYBODY messes with "Dopey Joe" Biteme
Martin Owens| 3.22.11 @ 7:45AM
You missed the best part- check the news feeds.
Biden took a train to the dedication ceremony, which BROKE DOWN, and he had to show up by car.
There's no making this stuff up.
logmank| 3.22.11 @ 8:09AM
Mr. Blackwell - No, the unemployment rate IS NOT 9%. It is more like 17%.
coal carrier| 3.22.11 @ 8:28AM
We all know where Hitler, Stalin and Mao are today. They were responsible for the deaths of over 100,000,000 human beings. Joe Beiden, a Catholic, may be jubilant now for the continuation of abortion-on-demand. However, when he meets his Maker it would be interesting to hear him justify the deaths of 50,000,000 innocent babies.
wbheff| 3.22.11 @ 11:33AM
Correction!!! Biden may call himself a Catholic, but, since he supports abortion on demand, he isn't.
MOS was 71331| 3.22.11 @ 12:58PM
Amen!!! You can call a man who supports abortion on demand many things, but Catholic isn't one of them.
Frisbee| 3.22.11 @ 7:35PM
I visited Nevers, France, where lays the incorrupt body of St Bernadette of Lourdes. Reading a short biography of her, someone asked her "Are you afraid of anything?". "Nothing", she replied, "except bad Catholics".
Joe Biden, Nancy Pelosi, Ted Kennedy, John Kerry, etc etc. All bad Catholics. Having been baptized and then repossessed by Satan, they fulfill the prophecy of Jesus, "Thus the last state of that man is worse than the first".
Having taken up the language of "choice" with regard to abortion, they partake in the sin by consent.
Pelligrino| 3.24.11 @ 3:15PM
Please add present and former New York State governors to this list. Their names, of course, are Cuomo.
Christians they are not.
There are many names to add to this list.
LarryK| 3.22.11 @ 8:28AM
I agree with Bush 43.
He said, "If bulls**t were brains, Joe would be the smartest person in the world."
Mike Hawk| 3.22.11 @ 8:43AM
Anyone who has ever been to that station would wonder how you could spend that much money 'refurbishing' it. Hell's Bells, for just the cost over-run you could have built an entire new station. Pork for everyone.
Ken (Old Texican)| 3.22.11 @ 8:49AM
Joe Biden is merely an I. I. P.
(Impeachment Insurance Policy)
Thank God enough Americans had woken up by last November. As Jim DeMint wrote in his book, we can now start "unwinding this mess".
LarryK| 3.22.11 @ 8:49AM
This applies to Obama and Biden.
"Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak."
Anthony| 3.22.11 @ 9:22AM
Biden is a sterling example of the axiom that in Washington excrement floats to the top.
Albert| 3.22.11 @ 10:27AM
Wow. The "Joseph R. Biden Amtrak Station." Are they serious?! What's next? The "James Earl Carter Helicopter Landing Pad" in Iran? Or worse, the "Norm Mineta Airport?" OOPS! They actually HAVE that one! Sheesh! Aren't we making heroes of the wrong people?
Anthony| 3.22.11 @ 1:40PM
How about the Ted Kennedy Sobriety Clinic or the Bill Clinton Chastity House.
Petronius| 3.22.11 @ 11:10AM
Would anybody drive across a bridge or causeway named for Ted Kennedy?
Sam Levi| 3.22.11 @ 11:37AM
No, but I might drive off of it.
Bill Diebold| 3.22.11 @ 12:22PM
...at least when Biden finally leaves politics he'll be able to get a job on the Simpson show and become Homer's tourette syndrome afflicted uncle...until that time we'll have to satisfy ourselves with the homer bumma show.
JeffT| 3.22.11 @ 12:29PM
If Joe were named Sarah, you'd never hear the end of this on late night TV and the usual places where Sarah is a dirty word.
MOS was 71331| 3.22.11 @ 1:03PM
Bill Maher and other TV "comics" love to cite statements Sarah Palin never made as evidence of her stupidity.
Rowdy Boots| 3.22.11 @ 12:40PM
A PLAQUE ON THE WILMINGTON TRAIN STATION WALL:
ATTENTION: TREAD CAREFULLY, WE CANNOT AFFORD TO KEEP THIS PLACE CLEAN
MOS was 71331| 3.22.11 @ 1:05PM
Sorry, Rowdy. I don't understand the point you're trying to make.
Mike Hawk| 3.22.11 @ 1:17PM
How about:
ATTENTION: TREAD CAREFULLY, WE CANNOT AFFORD TO KEEP THIS PLACE CLEAN/ JOE BIDEN SPOKE ON THIS SPOT
Rowdy Boots| 3.22.11 @ 12:40PM
A PLAQUE ON THE WILMINGTON TRAIN STATION WALL:
ATTENTION: TREAD CAREFULLY, WE CANNOT AFFORD TO KEEP THIS PLACE CLEAN
David T| 3.22.11 @ 2:00PM
Sometime in the early 90's I had the opportunity to attend a Senate hearing and sit in the front row of the visitors' section. At a break, Sen Biden strutted over like the cock-of-the-walk and started chatting up a particularly attractive young lady near me in the gallery. The man was sheer smugness and arrogance. For the price of his suit alone you could probably have funded a soup kitchen for a year. But the most striking (and telling) thing about him was the distinct outline on his forehead of a recent hair transplant. Ever since then I always chuckle when I hear Rush refer to him as "plugs." Like "sheets" for Sen Byrd, the "plugs" moniker tells you all you need to know about Joe Biden.
Dave | 3.22.11 @ 3:58PM
Kinda' makes you long for the days when Dan Quayle was trying to spell ... potato(e). Then again, ol' Dan never addressed a room full of people and asked some poor guy in a wheel chair to "stand up and be recognized."
Oppsy!
T-t-t-that's all, folks.
Christian Louboutin | 6.23.11 @ 4:13AM
Well, we all wanted to know who would replace the late, beloved Robert Byrd of West Virginia as the king of pork. Now we know. Washington legend has it that Sen. Byrd modestly turned down all attempts to re-named the Mountaineer State for him. It seems the name "Byrdland" was already taken.
Creative Recreation | 8.10.11 @ 11:41PM
is good