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Political Hay
The Overrated Five
Who needs overrated movies when there are political narratives out there begging to be demystified?
Somewhere during one of my various late-night web cruises, I happened on a list of the “Twenty Most Overrated Movies of All Time” by Ben Shapiro over at Andrew Breitbart’s Big Hollywood, and I thought that I might try my hand at it. But, feeling as I do that the era of Hollywood’s worthiness is perhaps 60 years behind us, and that I’ve only seen maybe five new movies in the last ten years or so, any list that I might come up with would probably include most films made after say, 1955.
This is not to say that there weren’t more than a few overrated flicks made during the so-called Golden Age of Hollywood. For example, I can’t watch Citizen Kane for more than a few minutes without screaming “Nobody was in the room when he whispered ‘Rosebud’!” at the TV. Nor can I bear the cloying sentimentality of certain Frank Capra offerings like, It’s a Wonderful Life or Meet John Doe. But I’d rather be stranded on a desert island for life with these rather than sit through even one more viewing of a modern “classic” like Titanic; a monstrosity to which I could devote at least five full columns.
No, my movie list will probably never see the light of day, so I thought that a more useful and interesting compilation would be one that addresses the most overrated skills of political figures. You know what I mean; in the same way that movie critics tell us over and over that such and such a film is a masterwork of dystopian art by a great auteur, we are barraged, ad nauseam, with similar nonsense in regards members of a certain political party. And so here, in order of their appearance, are the winners.
1. The Catholicism of John F. Kennedy. Like the movie version of a novel that is deemed too long by the producers, the liberal media have ignored JFK’s tax-cutting and anti-Communist tendencies and focused instead on his more noble attributes; chief among them, his family’s deep religious convictions. Of course, in reality, his famous statement that he would act “in accordance with what my conscience tells me to be the national interest, and without regard to outside religious pressures or dictates,” was an insult to all Christians who believe that there is no conflict between the tenets of their faith and what is good for America. All paeans to Kennedy Catholicism, past and present, should remain on the cutting room floor.
2. The Nobility and Sanctity of Jimmy Carter. Like the filibuster scene in Capra’s Mr. Smith Goes to Washington, Mr. Carter’s public life seems to go on ad infinitum, and with the same stomach-turning results. But of all the drooling veneration heaped upon the Georgia peach, the most annoying is his reputation as a humanitarian, when in reality it is a cruel joke. During his administration, millions suffered at the hands of brutal regimes that were at best unhindered, and at worst encouraged by Carter’s forays into foreign policy. In some ways, his Nobel Peace Prize was more of an affront than Barack Obama’s.
3. The Compassion of Bill Clinton. In the same way that the criminal script-writers of Titanic saw fit to inject idiotic scenes like gun chases into what is one of the most compelling and heart-wrenching events in human history, so too was the “I-feel-your-pain” pathos of the Clinton presidency the stuff of which Hollywood dreams are made. This is best summed up by the bizarre yet prescient remarks of Shirley MacLaine, who praised Clinton’s “charismatic empathy” and his “talent in attracting conflict so that we in this country can learn about our ability to heal.”
4. The Debating Skills of Al Gore. Like Orson Welles’ cardboard characterization of Charles Foster Kane, this myth is stiff, boring and unconvincing. As I wrote some years ago, “In the run-up to the 2000 election, pundit after pundit warned that the veep’s ace in the hole would be his utter domination of the tongue-tied cowboy when they squared off in the debate arena. Many on the right agreed, fretting fearfully that all would be lost once the candidates toed the rostrum rubber. Suffice to say that if one actually watched all of Gore’s debates, the only prior opponent he ever faced who had brains plus personality was Dan Quayle, who cleaned his clock in ‘92. Ditto, George W. Bush in 2000.”
5. The Eloquence of Barack Obama. Just as no violent, depressing, foul-mouthed effort of Martin Scorsese can be released without gobs of gooey praise, so too is every word that drops from the mouth of Barack Obama lauded to the skies by his worshipful chroniclers. True eloquence is defined as “the ability to project words fluidly out of the mouth and the ability to understand and command the language in such a way that one employs a graceful style coupled with the power of persuasion.” In truth, our current president — with or without his faithful teleprompter — has all the vocal grace and fluency of Travis Bickle.
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Stand Watie| 3.18.11 @ 7:01AM
No. 4.5: The intellect of Al Gorleone, whose grades in college were worse than W.'s, and who flunked out of divinity school
Alan Brooks| 3.18.11 @ 4:51PM
"Titanic; a monstrosity to which I could devote at least five full columns."
The producer almost deliberately tried to ruin 'Titanic' with the scene wherein the aged heroine (a senile smirk on her face) dropped the diamond in the ocean. And she narrates the obligatory boinking scene where her younger self does it with Leonardo De Caprio right before the ship hits the iceberg (I think the accident happened while they were in a state of afterglow).
It was a sensationalistic kid flick in style; however even a kid flick wouldn't be so bad as to have a senile old lady drop a large diamond in the Atlantic!
IMBECILIC.
Alan Brooks| 3.18.11 @ 8:46PM
I just fastforwarded the scenes in Titanic, the heroine says in the scene wherein she is having a nude portrait of her painted: "it was the most erotic moment in my life." That was it? her life must have been pretty dull. The film wasn't atrocious, yet it does seem those involved near-deliberately tried to sabotage the film with really bad scenes and dialogue, as if they wanted to place little turds in the punchbowl. Maybe they had to spice the film up for the yahoos. Even a good film such as Goodfellas had enough of the F-word to make Larry Flynt blush. Speaking of Flynt, the 'People v Larry Flynt' tried to prove Flynt was MLK or Gandhi-- what were they thinking?
Or take a TV show such as MASH which might have been a classic, but they turded it with asinine dialogue and the ever-present laugh track:
"Radar! colonel Potter wants another martini, pronto!"
"Oh Hoolihan what big tatas you have-- Frank thinks so anyway, he he."
The 'Honeymooners' didn't even need a laugh track at all to be a classic. No wonder so many people are paleos. I surmise it is based on aesthetics more than anything.
Alan Brooks| 3.18.11 @ 11:04PM
..."Klinger, what a nice dress, you might get honorably discharged AFTER the war is over... hee he hee..."
[laugh track]
My favorite imaginary flicks are:
'Next Bush Administration Will Reduce The Size Of Government'
And a series:
'Worthy Successor to Reagan, pt. 1, 1989 to 1993'
'Worthy Successor to Reagan, pt. 2, 2000- 2009'
They are tragi-comedies, BTW.
RN in Houston| 3.19.11 @ 9:44AM
Go away troll.
Alan Brooks| 3.19.11 @ 10:24PM
Go to Hell, rube.
You and your fat wife.
Alan Brooks| 3.19.11 @ 10:31PM
... go to Austin and look at the Bush dynasty talismans on display. Precious Garbage.
W| 3.18.11 @ 7:13AM
algore also dropped out/flunked out of law school.
Stand Watie| 3.18.11 @ 8:34AM
Excellent point. Of course, algore mortis' grades were particularly deplorable in the scientific subjects, his self-asserted "expertise" in the field of "climate change" notwithstanding.
martin j smith| 3.18.11 @ 8:00AM
I will add #6 and #7. The 'GOODNESS OF THE DEMOCRAT PARTY" AND THE " SELFISHNESS OF THE REPUBLICAN PARTY" OR "DEMOCRAT PARTY FOR LITTLE PEOPLE AND REPUBLICANS FOR THE RICH"
It is vital that our side shows that the Democrat Socialists are bathing in moolah. Equally important tie Obama to the UNIONS AND UNIONS TO THUGURY.
C. S. P. Schofield| 3.18.11 @ 9:09AM
I would propose; The Idealism Of Woodrow Wilson. Wilson was both an elitist twit and a vile bigot. It was under his administration and with his tacit approval that Mitchel Palmer persecuted hundreds of immigrants and dissidents in a way that would make him far more notorious than McCarthy if the Left didn't need so desperately to discredit anti-communism.
ACynic| 3.18.11 @ 11:52AM
Wilson waited to damn long to deport the communist garbage radicals; and he did not deport enough of them. Most of them came out of russia or eastern europe and when they get here, mostly staying in NYC, they were determined to impose a bolshevik communist govt here in the USA.
Why the hell did they not stay in russia or eastern europe? If the did not like it here, why did they not leave?
Because he did not deport ALL of them, they went on to form and populate the CPUSA. Folks of this ilk now dominate the "green" movement, and have promoted "political correctness" and the criminal thuggish union bosses.
Deporting this vermin was the ONLY thing Wilson did correctly. Otherwise, he was a truly lousy president.
Tim the Enchanter| 3.18.11 @ 12:54PM
Don't forget that the Federal Reserve was create under his "watch".
PhilTheCapitalistPig| 3.18.11 @ 1:24PM
AND; He re-instituted segregation in federal buildings.
Fred in SC| 3.19.11 @ 11:00PM
Not only that---he and his idiot Navy Secretary Josephus Daniels kicked all blacks out of the Navy except to serve as stewards and messmen; THERE'S a progressive icon for you!
CalMark| 3.18.11 @ 2:59PM
Wilson sold out Ukraine and other inconvenient Slavic countries that didn't happen to have name-recognition in the West, so that he could have his dream of the League of Nations.
In short, Wilson enslaved tens of millions to pursue a utopian (ultimately worse-than-futile) collectivist mirage--in the name of freedom and liberty.
Bob Grant| 3.18.11 @ 9:34AM
#6 The political skills of Barack Obama - It's amusing that the lapdog press are now pinning for the days of 2008 when Obama was "at his pinnacle" i.e., when he was giving mediocre speeches with empty, sophomoric catch phrases. Yes, I agree that was BO at his finest but pleeeese dispense with the talk of him being a political genius when you have a press EAGER to get his message out in the best possible light (see George Stephanopolis' correction of BO when he blurted out he was a muslim).
To call Obama a political genius is like calling one of those disposable soviet premiers one.
Petronius| 3.18.11 @ 9:47AM
Not even Redford could sell tickets to this bill at Sundance. Best to edit it down for a miniseries on Oxygen (thieves), and change the title to The Mosquito Cast. A few of last nights drunks are still on the streets. I'll be in the library.
Michael Kohlman| 3.18.11 @ 9:54AM
For a sixth, I nominate GEORGE W. BUSH, CONSERVATIVE CRUSADER. and the sequel, JOHN McCAIN. And, sorry, but you're wrong on TITANIC, which wasn't about the ship or the characters or the tragedy, but an uplifting testament to the joy of life and how you live it.
Sheila| 3.18.11 @ 10:46AM
Yes on your political observations; no on the movie (I haven't seen it - nor most others out of the left coast - but merely from hearing (over and over and over) others emoting about it, I hate it.
Steve A| 3.18.11 @ 1:14PM
Sheila, You did not miss much. Rich girl falls for poor boy against family wishes. Boat sinks. Rich girl floats on driftwood while poor boy turns into ice cube on side of driftwood.
Skippy| 3.18.11 @ 2:44PM
It stunk on ice...bergs.
MOS was 71331| 3.18.11 @ 3:12PM
The best movie on the Titanic was 1958's "A Night to Remember." That movie closely followed Walter Lord's book, with actors portraying actual people who had been on the Titanic. Except for a few crew members, the main characters in the 1997 movie were invented for the movie. I guess the makers of the 1997 movie thought that the actual 1912 events weren't sufficiently dramatic and had to be spiced up with an invented romance between Leonardo DiCaprio in steerage and Kate Winslet in first class.
David W| 3.18.11 @ 10:27AM
No. 3 (Bill's compassion). I remember watching the news - a funeral was being held for some muckity muck. Mr Clinton attended. After the funeral he and another person were walking up the path joking. When Bill looked up and saw the camera on him, his expression changed instantly (no smile, very solemn). At that point I knew exactly what kind of a person he was (I suspected before, but all doubts were erased).
Clint| 3.18.11 @ 10:54AM
6. Golfing For Kenya : An over his head cocky trash talkin' mulatto shucks & jives his way into The White House, only to lose himself in the game of golf, as a means of hiding from doing anything Presidential.
His wife Latrina runs away with their dog Poo & starts The " I'm A Fat Ass & I Luv Myself Clinic" with her new girlfriend, The famous TV star, Oval Rumpfrey.
Merrymaking and hijinks ensue.
Nate| 3.18.11 @ 12:37PM
Yikes...
PhilTheCapitalistPig| 3.18.11 @ 1:26PM
Tell us how you really feel, Clint! LOL
Whoa keemosabe!
Cynicon Implant| 3.18.11 @ 4:33PM
Very funny stuff Clint!! lmao
How about: "Spending to Prosperity"
In a sweeping epic of gargantuan proportions, a band of do-gooders refuses to give in to economic reality, takes over the US Mint and begins printing a never-ending supply of cash to give to the have-nots. When this strategy backfires by devaluing the currency and exploding the deficit, these intrepid bunglers soldier on -- insisting that the country is not broke despite all evidence to the contrary. Alas, it all comes to a tragic end when they find their beloved lock-box is empty.
Bob Grant| 3.19.11 @ 11:43AM
He doesn't seem to shuck and jive much these days. Reality's catchin' up to BO I think.
Cuffs| 3.18.11 @ 11:13AM
How about a silent film of Obama, the Obscure?
You would not be missing anything by not hearing his words and the body language of the bobblehead reading his speech notes would
certainly win an academy award for special effects.
ACynic| 3.18.11 @ 11:45AM
If you consider the record of FDR he MUST go down as the worst president in amerian history. That elitist, arrogant, clueless, blue-blood millionaire destroyed the lives of millions of people and it was HIS policies that extended the depression brought on by Hoover.
On another note, Jimmy Carter must have been royally screwed over (in his mind, anyway) while in the Navy, because his policies were consistent with someone who literally hates americans and the USA; just like Barry HUSSEIN OCCOMIE.
PhilTheCapitalistPig| 3.18.11 @ 1:27PM
FDR wasn't a bad guy before he got into office. But he surrounded himself with progressives who led him astray. He was a limited govt guy before becoming president.
But... you're right.
All American American| 3.18.11 @ 12:12PM
How about "Abe Lincoln's Love for the Constitution."
dsayne| 3.18.11 @ 1:11PM
All I know is that BO makes Old Tippecanoe look like a great president!
CalMark| 3.18.11 @ 2:54PM
...and I thought I was the only one who hated "It's a Wonderful Life." Unfair, crappy movie: the crook gets away with stealing the money, then there he is at the end, serenading the downtrodden (a born victim, if ever there was one) hero.
Bleah.
Susie Q| 3.18.11 @ 3:21PM
As Potter snorted, "Sentimental Hogwash!"
Flee| 3.18.11 @ 4:04PM
All it takes is for me to hear the voice of any of these five for me to change the channel. No matter the time or subject I simply can't take hearing any of them anymore. I have occasion to read what they say but listening is far too much effort and unbearable. Even old tapes of JFK are unmoving. The Goracle won't debate to this day. Maybe he is painfully aware of his shortcomings.
Quartermaster| 3.18.11 @ 6:56PM
Anyone that hates "It's A Wonderful Life" is a commie of the worst sort. Fabrizio is clearly a Leninist.
Tina B| 3.18.11 @ 7:35PM
What was that?
Tina B| 3.18.11 @ 7:35PM
Flee, I am right there with you. Mute!
CRW| 3.18.11 @ 8:59PM
Thank you, Ms Fabrizio for saying what many of us think about "It's A Wonderful Life." It is a depressing movie. The "Hero" wastes his whole life supporting mostly weak and stupid people. When he is in the car leaving for his honeymoon, but turns around to see what the commotion is about, I want to yell at the screen, "Keep on going you fool!"
Dixie Pixie| 3.18.11 @ 9:43PM
#7....The Democratic Party Saves the Working Man...
There has been no greater myth than the Democratic Party works for the benefit of the working people.
For example::::
A...The Democrats have for years looted the pension funds(Social Security).
B...They have demolished the manufacturing sector destroying millions of good high paying jobs.
C...Are in the process of shutting down the energy sector thereby raising energy prices to personally
D...catastrophic levels.
E...They have inflected hordes of predatory lawyers to plague the populace.
F...They have borrowed money in such vast numbers as to enslave future generations under mountains of debt.
G...Buried political debate and political thought under a malevolent fog of lies.
H...Have raised spending upon themselves to historically unprecedented heights by looting 46% of GNP.
Bob Shrum and company have promoted the myth that the Democratic Party is for the common man.
The Democrats are really only looting and pillaging the Working Class for the Ruling Class economic and political benefits.
Dixie Pixie| 3.19.11 @ 12:25AM
#8....The Democratic Party is the Party of Virtue....
Let us review the historical record::::
A...The President Jefferson and the Virginia Proto-Democratics set up the Plantation System which enslaved millions of Blacks for centuries.
B... President Jackson (D) committed genocide and ethnic cleansing on the Native-American population...aka "The Trail of Tears".
C...Jeff Davis (D) and a group of Southern Democrats started a Rebellion (Civil War) that resulted in the devastation of the Southern States for generations.
D...The Democratic Party committed a series of land grabs called the Indian Wars resulting in the near extinction of the Native-American population.
E...President Polk caused a major war (Mexican War) in a land grab scam which acquired the South Western States.
F... Presidents Wilson and FDR were elected on the promise that they would keep the USA out of War and promptly reneged on that promise killing hundreds of thousands.
G...As Chris McNair (D) Alabama and Charles Rangel (D) New York have proven that even when convicted of major felonies, a Democrat need never serve a day in jail.
H...Sec Treasury Geithner proved when caught embezzling funds given to him to pay for his income taxes and then not paying those taxes, the felonies are a reason for promotion in the Democratic Party.
I...Bill Clinton has never explained where the hundreds of millions of dollars in the Haitian Fund disappeared on little cat feet.
J...President Obama will never be held accountable for the TRILLIONS of dollars spent on the Democratic Party and minions.
The bottom line is if the Democratic Party was a private sector organization it would be found to be a ongoing criminal organization lasting for centuries.
The Democratic Party continues to kill millions of unborn children through abortion.
So in what way are the Democrats Virtuous?
Is Slavery,Massive Corruption, Genocide and Mass Murder truly Virtuous?
Dixie Pixie| 3.19.11 @ 8:54AM
Dude...You ripped off and then then ripped up my material.
Then you did not have the decency to even send a complementary handbag!
That was tacky even for an asian computer program.
Dixie Pixie| 3.20.11 @ 2:15PM
Dude...That is the second time you have ripped off and then ripped up my material.
That is twice tacky even for a bandit computer program.
Don't you know the penalty for plagiarism is to be inflected with Joe Biden’s disease.
It is a truly horrible disease which scrambles historical memory, causes one to misuse analogies and forces one to steal cliches and misuse them.
However it does qualify the sufferer for high office in the Democratic Party even for a asian computer program as a birth certificate is no longer required.
Michael L. Hauschild| 3.20.11 @ 10:41AM
Lisa,
You are a joy!
Creative Recreation | 8.10.11 @ 11:48PM
is good