-
The Seventeen Year Itch
May 15, 2013 | 6 comments
-
Questions
May 1, 2013 | 50 comments
-
Stifling Our Children
April 15, 2013 | 39 comments
-
Thoughts on Gay Marriage
March 27, 2013 | 96 comments
-
Baseball Saints and Sinners
March 13, 2013 | 13 comments
Another Perspective
A Liberal Carol
Liberalism was dead — a ghostly story in two parts.
(A Ghostly Story in Two Parts)
Liberalism was dead; as dead as a doornail. This must be distinctly understood, or nothing wonderful can come of the story I am going to relate. The problem was, at least for the occupant of the Oval Office and some of his closest acquaintances, that they were the last to realize it; and in truth, were loath to admit it, even if they were to own up to the truth of it all.
President Barack Obama, once he had gained the halls of power, had no care for the opinions of others, believing that he had been elected on the merits of his policies rather than his own personal magnetism. Oh! But he was an obstinate, stubborn, pig-headed, unrepentant old liberal! Haughty and self-possessed, with the physique of Lincoln and the chin of Mussolini, Obama felt himself to be the perfect leader of men; men who were content to live under the oppressive yoke of socialism, that is.
One day, not so many days ago, an aide entered the Oval Office to inform him that the incoming Speaker of the House was seeking entrance into the inner sanctum. “Bah!” thought Obama as he recalled the recent electoral humiliation he had received at the hands of John Boehner’s party. “Humbug!”
“Mr. President,” said Boehner, “at this festive season of the year, it is more than usually desirable that we should make some slight provision for the poor and hard-pressed taxpayers who are suffering greatly at the present time. Many, many Americans are out of work and cannot not afford to properly provide for their families, sir.”
“Are there no food stamps?” asked Obama.
“Plenty of food stamps,” answered Boehner, his eyes tearing up.
“And the state and federal welfare programs?” demanded the president. “Are they still in operation?”
“They are, sir,” Boehner said, adding; “Still, I wish I could say they were not.”
“Oh! I was afraid, from what you said at first, that something had occurred to stop them in their useful course,” said Obama. “I’m very glad to hear it.”
“Being under the impression that these programs are not conducive to ensuring American life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness as guaranteed by our Constitution,” returned the Speaker, “a few of us are endeavouring to make the Bush tax cuts permanent. Can we count on your support?”
“Never!” cried Barack, his chin inclined toward heaven and his finger pointing toward the door.
Later that evening, on his way out of the Oval Office, he glanced at a portrait of Abraham Lincoln, cursing him for his party affiliation. As he stared at the countenance of the Great Emancipator, it became — without undergoing any intermediate process of change — not that of Honest Abe, but Jimmy Carter!
Carter! A man whose name Obama had banned from mention in the White House, given the awful comparisons drawn between the two Democratic presidents. His face possessed its familiar hangdog look but was eerily transparent; indeed, Barack could at once glimpse both his eyes and the nail holding his picture to the wall. Obama had often heard that Carter had no brains, but he never believed it till now. Then, just as abruptly as it had appeared, the portrait resumed its presidentiality and once again became that of Lincoln.
Giving his head a vigorous shake, Obama dismissed the apparent apparition as the effects of his disturbing meeting with Boehner, and quickly hurried outside for a smoke. Suddenly a harsh wind cut through the winter night as the president shivered against the West Wing wall, struggling to keep his Marlboro lit. An eerie wail pierced the gloom and seemed to call his name: “Oh-bahm-ah, Oh-bahma-ah!” it cried.
Letter to the Editor View all comments (24) | Leave a comment
More Articles by Lisa Fabrizio
More Articles From Another Perspective
http://spectator.org/archives/2010/12/15/a-liberal-carol
Follow us:
ADVERTISEMENT
Current Issue
- Wincing at Cumberbatch
- Downton’s Class System — and Ours
- Inside the Gates of Eden
SPONSORED LINKS
FLASHBACK TO: 1995
-
Pope Culture
A man of faith in a godless age is hitting Americans where it hurts.
-
Why the GOP Does Not, Like, Totally Suck
Mr. and Mrs. American Spectator Reader, let P.J. O’Rourke talk sense to your kids.
-
Dames at Sea
-
In the Absence of Guns
In Britain, defending your property can get you life.
-
The Metaphysical Martini
-
Counting the Costs of Clintonism
The debacle of this president’s administration is both a cause and a symptom of the decline of American values. Unless Congress impeaches him, that decline will go on unchecked. An eminent jurist surveys the damage and assesses the chances for the recovery of our culture.
-
Chuck McHagel
It won’t take long for conservatives to scratch this presidential wannabe off their 2008 scorecard.
-
The Legacy of Old John and Mother Fresh-Roasted
-
It’s the Best Time of the Year
The American Christmas, like the songs that celebrate it, makes room for everybody under the rainbow. Is that why so many people seem to be hostile to it?
-
The Bush Crack-Up
Was the President done in by the economy, or by the politics of the economy?
Clip of the Day
ADVERTISEMENT
Appleby| 12.15.10 @ 6:10AM
What I want to know is who was the violent jerk he turnd with? Biden is a jerk, but he isnt violent.
albert constatntine jr.| 12.15.10 @ 10:29PM
I'm not sure he isn't violent. He has a nasty temper, and I seem to recall him choking someone on a rope line when questioned about clean coal (though I may be confusing and conflating him with Al Franken).
dwylin miller| 12.16.10 @ 3:54PM
Biden just like John Kerry, is one of the most arrogant, look down his long libral nose, pompous, elitist, intelectual wana-be, that thinks he knows whats best for every body else,and in reality, is so out of touch with real down to America, he doesnt have a clue about anything. He's such an absolute baphoon.
Deborah D | 12.15.10 @ 7:03AM
A true fairy tale! Can you imagine, even in his afterlife that Carter will ever change!? He's only gotten more bitter; more deluded; more communistic in his silly old age. I hope the good Lord shakes some sense into him after he passes.
Alan Brooks| 12.15.10 @ 2:06PM
Carter said his mistake was not being re-elected??
His mistake was not following William Henry Harrison's example.
Grzmlyk| 12.15.10 @ 8:43AM
Very clever - I like it; but I'm puzzled by the first sentence: "Liberalism was dead; as dead as a doornail."
This is patently untrue, and I do not understand the likes of Sean Hannity, among many others, dancing prematurely on the grave of liberalism. Have they no memory whatsoever?
Liberalism is NOT dead; like Dracula, it is the undead and cannot be killed by mere elections.
Hell, half the GOP 0f the 112th congress will be co-opted by "compassionate conservativism" (i.e., looting taxpayers' pockets with one hand while pointing fingers at Democrats with the other) before you can say, "hey, that's my wallet," and, as sure as the sun rises in the east and sets in the west, the GOP will be tossed on its collective tin ear within one or, at most, two election cycles at the hands of a resurgent Democrat party in which "hope" and "change" will be newly-minted yet again and, as usual, the collective media's ability to perceive the invariable failure of socialism always and everywhere will once again fail.
Maybe by then they won't be "Democrats" or "Liberals" or "Progressives" - maybe they'll have a new name - perhaps "New Centrists." That has a nice, mendacious ring to it on a par with all of their previous hypocritical monikers.
But one thing's for sure: the new GOP house majority will blow it (indeed, is already blowing it) and the wind will soon enough be once again at liberals' fat backs.
The ONLY way to stop this is, to borrow a meme from liberalism, to "break the cycle of [economic] violence" - meaning our collective desire to continue to encourage the unbridled metasticization of government by borrowing/printing money.
What do you suppose the odds are of a meth addict willingly giving up his drug to please YOU?
Therefore, folks, it is hand-over-fist business as usual in DC - that is, the true business of our government, which is not protecting our freedoms or defending the constitution or ensuring a strong defence; no, the true business of our government is ONLY doling out goodies to cronies, pawns and thugs in order to buy votes so our "elected" representatives can continue to live like sultans while their subjects struggle mightily to bear these pigs' ever-burgeoning weight on their increasingly-strained backs.
As long as we can continue to kick the can of fiscal restraint down the road, absolutely nothing will change.
Well, one thing: Naked coercion will increasingly the centerpiece of our relationship with our government until it is indistinguishable from the relationship between the thug with a ski mask and a glock in his hand and the gas station clerk begging for his life as he empties his cash register.
But when the music stops - and it will stop - and the whole rotten edifice comes crashing down and we become a third-world country with a fifth-rate standard of living for all but the grifters, the felons and the well-connected (i.e., the politburo) - maybe then we'll figure out that you can't give everything to every constituency by demonizing "millionaires and billionaires" and operating under the outrageous assumption that all money is the government's - which is literally where we are now.
The good news: the collapse has already begun. As soon as China decides to address its inflation problem, we are dead. Eat drink and be merry, y'all.
Revolution is the answer.
John McG| 12.15.10 @ 9:30AM
"Revolution is the answer."
I'm afraid you're right.
Anthony| 12.15.10 @ 4:42PM
Revolution appears to be the only concept these politicans will understand. They count way too much on the civility and peaceful character of the American people.
As Harry Reid forces this putrid spending bill through Congress, these hacks best be thankful that there are no mobs waiting outside the Capitol for them.....yet.
Grzmlyk| 12.15.10 @ 9:54AM
I should amend this slightly -
I admit, the GOP is damned if it does and damned if it doesn't.
If they emulate Democrats and play Santa Claus during this next Congress (which I contend they will do despite a surfeit of rhetoric to the contrary), it will be a pathetic attempt to woo Hispanics and blacks et al, and to get the mainstream media to appreciate its beneficence (see Bush, George) It doesn't matter how much lucre the GOP doles out to victim groups - the mainstream media will forever relegate the party to a position in which it can only press its collective nose against the glass of popular culture's zeitgeist and covet the warm glow of acceptance inside. No sale. The "greedy" and "evil" GOP will be tarred with the usual brush and summarily ousted.
If, on the other hand, the GOP actually sticks to its Tea Party-loaded guns, the media and our pop culture icons - along with squishy independents, youth, seniors and even many party faithful themselves - will squeal like stuck pigs, because the only way to avoid disaster is DRACONIAN cuts to everything. The gravy train has got to come to a halt.
That is simply not going to happen. The "greedy"and "evil" GOP will be tarred with the usual brush and summarily ousted.
This is the tune we are dancing to, and the dance will not cease until the orchestra stops playing.
And, as I recall, the orchestra on the Titanic played on, too. Right up until they slipped under the icy Atlantic.
Bill Kay | 12.15.10 @ 11:11AM
Iam truly afraid that you are right , and I dont think we should waist any more in the process.
Deborah D | 12.16.10 @ 5:40AM
I think they'll be called "No Labels" -- that's their latest Orwellian BS.
diverjimk| 12.16.10 @ 4:33PM
My greatest fear is that you are right! Hopefully (there's that hideous word [hope] again!) somebody who really "Gets it" will come to power.
MalikTous | 12.17.10 @ 12:38PM
Sounds like a Men Without Hats song, though that one was about China... where the Maoists need to be shoved into the Pacific to drown so the Taiwanese can re-establish the dynasty. China is too big to run on a participatory republic government, but a constitutional dynasty might just work. As for the USA, I keep praying for a 'bloodless voter revolt' against big politics and installation of more representative politicians.
Cro-magnon| 12.15.10 @ 10:23AM
Oh that's beautiful Lisa! I can't wait for the next installment. Who's going to be the ghost of liberals past, Saul Alinsky?
Ken (Old Texican)| 12.15.10 @ 10:23AM
Grz,
As always, you nailed it!
There is going to be an "event" as in "event horizon" where the light is sucked off.
I have some pretty good clues as to what the "event/s " will be.
Please download my new book and see what you think. www.texassaidno.com
I would love to see your review.
hunter| 12.15.10 @ 11:40AM
The best thing about fairy tales and even the horrible sinking of the titanic is that eventually the end comes, drawn out perhaps, but at longlast a sense of finality, closure. But the only way the current debaucle in washingstoned will end will be decades, maybe centuries of slavery, pain, and torture on the american people. Down is up up is down, Alice really is in wonderland....wheeee
Michael| 12.15.10 @ 3:02PM
He should also have been added, "Carter then said, "I am haunted by the fact in 1976 Alabama Governor
George Wallace would have made a far greater president than I, and now the country suffers for my being elected".
doctorluger| 12.15.10 @ 5:17PM
Baloney,
Liberalism is not dead, just had a setback. There were much same predictions that conservatism was dead after Obama was elected, it was not.
Unfortunately, leftism is much stronger in the earth. Every major western government is essentally socalist or moving in that direction. The push to "control the people" and reserect "serfdom" is thriving.
I am amazed at the number of people who clamor for and cannot wait to be "ruled" Global feudalism is on the march.
Jimbob| 12.16.10 @ 4:38PM
I have always said that we need to elect some Democrats now and then just so we don't forget how bad it can get. The problem this time is we elected too many. The country can survive a Democrat President if the House and Senate are populated with normal people and vice versa. To elect a Democrat President and a super majority of Democrats in the Congress was almost the end of this great experiment in Democracy. Do you realize that the only thing that saved us is the slim majority in the Supreme Court...one more liberal on the court and "everything" would become constitutional (President for life, OK, Martial law, sure, suspended elections, why not). I have been praying for the health of the sane members of the court for two years. With less than a month until the new congress takes office, we all should be worried.
I leave you with one of my favorite quotes:
I sit on a man's back, choking him and making
him carry me, and yet assure myself and others that I am sorry for him and wish to lighten his load by all means possible...except by getting off his back.
L. Tolstoy
jimmy| 12.16.10 @ 8:03PM
can't leave the first lady ya know have to a BJ ya know
Dave| 12.17.10 @ 12:59AM
I can't wait to read the conclusion. Who will the 3 ghosts be????? Unfortunately for the "Messiah", I think MARXISM is TOO engrained in him for him to learn the ERROR of his ways.
jerry| 12.17.10 @ 2:35AM
I like most of these people think that the conservatives will cave.and as the man said they are damned if they do and damed if they don't.If the people that are livimg on these hand outs lose them they are going to squeal real loud. that means going back to basics and taking care of you and yours. most of the people are born and raised in the city and can't do that. when they start stealing all hell will break out. and we will be right back where we are now.
Adult toys | 7.4.11 @ 4:04AM
Q:what is the strongest muscle?
A:the tongue—it can raise a woman’s hips.
Q:what is the lightest muscle?
A:the penis—it can be raised by a tongue.