The American Spectator : Halloween Horror

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Halloween Horror

By Andrew Cline on 10.29.10 @ 6:08AM

A city steals candy from its own children.

The worst Halloween trick in U.S. history might have been played on an entire generation of New England children -- by their own government. And it comes to an end this Sunday.

The most horrifying stories are those in which the antagonist intentionally, but inexplicably, inflicts pain on innocent victims. The more irrational or unreasonable the villain, the more horrifying. It will probably come as no surprise to American Spectator readers that the villain in this tale began its reign of terror in that decade in which reason took an extended nap -- the 1960s.

Starting in 1969, tales of Halloween horror took a sudden and unexplained leap in the public consciousness. Researchers Joel Best and Gerald Horiuchi, writing in 1985 in the journal Social Problems, found that from 1969 to 1973, America was awash in stories of terrifying Halloween-night sadism. All the now-familiar crimes were reported -- razor blades in apples, poisoned kids, sexual assaults and abductions, you name it. Many were reported in major newspapers, including the New York Times.

Across the country, local governments acted quickly to protect children. Many set official trick-or-treating hours to prevent kids from being out late, or to keep them in on Halloween night altogether. Manchester, N.H. was one of these municipalities. In 1972, the Board of Mayor and Aldermen voted to give the chief of police the power to set official trick-or-treating hours. Being the chief of police, he erred on the side of safety and ordered that the city's children would trick or treat during the daytime -- on the weekend before Halloween.

Fearing the horror stories, the government of Manchester effectively rescinded Halloween. The chief decreed, and the mayor and aldermen supported, that Halloween would occur during the afternoon of the Sunday before Halloween -- even if October 31 fell on a Sunday. The trouble was, the horror stories weren't true.

In their 1985 research, Best and Horiuchi found that not a single story of Halloween sadism was true. No child in America had ever found a razor blade in his apple. There were no random poisonings, and there was no increase in assaults, abductions, tortures, kidnappings, or anything else. The tales were all hoaxes.

There was, Best and Horiuchi found, a single child poisoned by Halloween candy. He was poisoned in 1974 by his own father, who did it for the insurance money. The father was executed in 1984. That was not a case of "stranger danger." In fact, research shows that Halloween night is no more dangerous than any other night. That research continues. An article last year in "Sexual Abuse: A Journal of Research and Treatment" found no increase in instances of sexual abuse on Halloween night.

The research on Halloween hoaxes emerged a decade after municipalities overreacted to the hoaxes by denying kids a Halloween-night rite of passage. Since then, it has made its way out of the academic journals and into the broader public domain. As the myths were busted, municipalities changed their policies. But Manchester didn't.

Police chiefs came and went, but decade after decade each of them made the same determination: Halloween would be held on the Sunday before October 31. Years passed since the myth of the poisoned apple was proven false -- decades passed, even -- and still Manchester denied its children the thrill of joining millions of other American children in an innocent and meaningful adventure in youthful self-exploration. It was not only irrational, but harmful.

Halloween is more than a massive candy-grab. Prompting kids try on grown-up personas and slip into the darkness to negotiate with total strangers, all under the watchful eyes of multitudes of parents, it involves the entire community in giving children their first chance to overcome some of the human race's innate fears -- darkness, strangers, and parental separation.

In short, Halloween is an important social ritual. When the nanny state takes that away in the name of safety, it can slow the development of the children in the community.

For 38 years, that is what Manchester, N.H., did. And then, this year, Police Chief David Mara did something completely unexpected. He announced, out of the blue, that the city's trick-or-treating hours would be on Halloween afternoon. After some prodding from new mayor Ted Gatsas, Mara later switched the hours. They will be on Halloween night.

So this Sunday, for the first time in nearly four decades, the children of Manchester will haunt the streets of Manchester under the cold, dark sky on October 31. I suspect that a lot of their parents, who never knew the thrill, will find excuses to wear masks themselves that night. And behind them, they'll be smiling.

About the Author

Andrew Cline is editorial page editor of the New Hampshire Union Leader. His Twitter ID is Drewhampshire.

Letter to the Editor View all comments (53) | Leave a comment

Booger| 10.29.10 @ 6:15AM

From the desk of Sheriff A. Mayberry:

To: Chief Deputy B. Fife

Appleby| 10.29.10 @ 6:17AM

Actually I think the whole idea of trick or treating door to door is a thundering nuisance, especially now that so many people live in apartments. It is not that this is dangerous for kids; it is dangerous for adults subject to home invasions, teenaged vandalism (in our community, cutting brake lines and spray-painting graffiti on cars is a favourite activity, as well as smashing rear windows with baseball bats) and generally annoying those who woul rather be left alone.

Our building, which does not have many children in it, has a treat table in the lobby with costumed hosts and hostesses, to keep the children out of the building proper. I suggest you take your kids to a party or arrange one for them, rather than pestering strangers. Oh, and teach your teenagers that property destruction is not *just a joke, maaaaaaan!*

Radegunda| 10.30.10 @ 2:36AM

The custom where I live is that if you don't want trick-or-treaters, don't put a pumpkin on your porch, and keep your porch light off. Kids don't go to houses that don't have some visible symbol of participation in the event. It works fine.

Tex Expatriate| 10.30.10 @ 7:24PM

When I was a kid 63 years ago we went to porches that had lights on, and we avoided porches that did not. On the other hand, we also vandalized "known" cranks with harmless pranks, and some not-so-harmless pranks always perpetrated on the school building. One year some boys dismantled an ancient Model A Ford and reassembled it on the roof of the high school. That kind of thing.

When I was in college many older students trick-or-treated professors' homes with cocktail glasses, expecting and often obtaining drinks.

Halloween and trick-or-treating is a healthy thing for healthy children and healthy adults. There are plenty of ways to manage it, as Appleby and Radegunda suggest.

Booger| 10.29.10 @ 6:26AM

From the desk of Sheriff A. Mayberry:

To: Chief Deputy B. Fife:

Dear Barney,

Look, Barney, you have got to ease up. Opie and the rest of the kids were really lookin' forward to Halloween this year. On top of that Aunt Bea and the rest of the knittin' circle are all up in arms over this whole mess. You know she buys candy by the bushel down at the five and dime this time of year, not to mention all that pie she's been cookin'. And now you've been goin' around town, puttin' up these signs that we're callin' the whole thing off.

Seriously, Barn, I wonder what gets into you sometimes. Ever since you started watchin' the news on CBS you get the craziest ideas in your head. First you decide all of our cars are gonna blow up, so you shut down traffic. Then you decide all our grocers are sellin' tainted food so you go in and shut down the supermarket. Then you get some nonsense about "alar", whatever that is, in your head and went around yankin' apples right out of people's hands. And now this.

I got to tell you Barney, I hate to do it, but if you don't give it a rest I'm gonna have to let you go. The town council is tellin' me they've finally had enough. They all got together and told me they've found somethin' scarier than witches, ghosts, werewolves and all that what-not; and it's a petty bureaucrat with too much time on his hands makin' mischief for the whole town. They say that's even scarier than all that stuff you keep seein' on CBS news all the time. I hate to say it Barney, but I think they mean you. And I just can't afford to be unemployed right now. So either you gotta reign it in, or I gotta let you go. And don't give me any more business about "nippin' it in the bud." The only bud we should have been nippin' around here was lettin' a fellow with too much time on his hand tell everybody else what to do.

Just a friendly suggestion,

Sheriff A. Mayberry

joli| 10.29.10 @ 11:08PM

Booger, just started reading your Steele piece, and noticed the same misspelling you used here: reign means to rule over; reins are what you guide horses with, or figuratively, what you guide a government with. Ok, I'm going back to my new favorite blog now...

OliverE| 10.30.10 @ 6:21AM

'Good response; it is "A. Taylor" not "A. Mayberry", though.

Anne| 10.30.10 @ 8:51AM

Whatever spelling is wrong - I LOVE IT! Very creative and a good read - and making a point while doing so. Thank you "Booger" :)

John Navratil| 10.31.10 @ 5:24PM

Well there you have it. The prodigious Booger has fox paws.

There is only one solution!

THE BOOGER NEEDS STAFF!

Spirit Halloween Coupon| 10.21.11 @ 9:58PM

Well said Booger!

Truth or Dare| 10.29.10 @ 7:45AM

I call truth! I vividly remember the local paper and Detroit Free Press running post Halloween articles about Fire stations across the state inspecting the loot and discovering pins, needles, glass and yes.. razor blades in some of it. So that makes your "No child in America..." statement false.

"....halloween is an important social ritual"? Crap! It was an important religious ritual, but like Christmas, secular society at large has perverted it into something ugly, dangerous, and annoying. Yes dangerous. Too many of our local teenagers have lost their lives to stupid antics in the name of "halloween tricks". One fell from a watertower, two more were launched from the back of a pick-up when the driver struck a pole, while they were throwing stolen pumpkins. One was shot by law enforcement after egging a cop car, being chased, cornered and the officer thought he had a gun. Bottom line, communities have the right to enact unpopular laws in an attempt to protect their young citizens from stupid and dangerous actions.

donserge| 10.29.10 @ 8:19AM

I can't believe that someone could say that Detroit and environs are indicative of the rest of the country.

Patrick| 10.29.10 @ 3:43PM

I can't believe someone would believe anything coming out of Detroit.

aware| 10.29.10 @ 6:51PM

I can't believe there even still IS a Detroit.

kaytb| 10.29.10 @ 9:03PM

There really isn't. It reminds me of what happened to Native Americans (the Indians) when the Fed put them on welfare. p.s. why didn't people think of that example when Johnson came along with his "Great Society"?

David March| 10.29.10 @ 11:26AM

Im pretty sure that those same kids would have done the same stupid things, on non-holidays and put themselves in danger whether it was Halloween or not.

Sounds like each of them was doing something that had nothing to do with going to houses and asking for candy. All of them were typical stupid teenagers, doing stupid teenage things. The price of living in a free society is having to put up with idiots. Id rather do that here, than live in communist russia.

Reinhard| 10.29.10 @ 12:24PM

Based on what your local teens do during Halloween, the holiday seems to be improving the gene pool. Maybe it should be held monthly...at least in your town.

Robert Pinkerton| 10.29.10 @ 12:38PM

"One was shot by law enforcement after egging a cop car, being chased, cornered and the officer thought he had a gun." That was a tragedy. A similar tragedy is just waiting to happen -- if it has not already happened but did not get reported nationwide -- when some child with an unconstrained "sense of 'humor'" red-dots a policeman with a laser-pointer. The poor policeman will respond as trained, and thereafter carry a lifetime burden of guilt for having killed an "innocent (quotation marks indicating reservation, whereas the victim was principally victimized by his owh stupidity).

WGMOW| 10.29.10 @ 3:12PM

Thid sounds like a load of nonesense. Excuse me, but firemen fight fires, they don't inspect candy. Isn't that the parents' job?

Seek| 10.29.10 @ 5:05PM

The actions are stupid, dangerous and criminal...and have nothing to do with "secular society." Halloween, like Christmas, has its roots in paganism (think the pre-Christian Celtic harvest festival of Samhain). That blacks in Detroit run riot every Halloween, burning every vacant building they can, says a lot more about black pathology than church-state separation.

kaytb| 10.29.10 @ 9:14PM

"I vividly remember the local paper and Detroit Free Press running post Halloween articles about Fire stations across the state inspecting the loot and discovering pins, needles, glass and yes.. razor blades in some of it." - i guessing this was AFTER the hoax. No hoax, no problem.

Tex Expatriate| 10.30.10 @ 7:31PM

The kind of evidence that you cite as "stupid antics in the name of 'halloween tricks' (sic) is the kind of thing a lot more kids do throughout the year, not just on Halloween. A secular and "Liberal" society has perverted America, not Halloween.

John Navratil| 10.31.10 @ 5:26PM

Time for someone to take a deep breath and move away from the light.

Melvin| 10.29.10 @ 8:01AM

Ahhh, those were the days of zombies, hobos, tutu'd princesses, witches and goblins of every size and shape filling the neighborhood streets like a mass of hungry locusts looking for the sugar fix.
Halloween may have started out as some Pagan or religious function, but for the longest time it was just for kids. Now that the government has defined a 26 year old as still a kid, Halloween has never been the same since.
Now neighborhoods are strangely silient on Halloween. No more neighborhoods sitting outside on their lawn-chairs chatting while ghosts and goblins troll the streets for candy.
Now everyone sits locked tight in their self-imposed prisons to be safe from the drive-byes, pedophiles, and teenagers looking to destroy something and looking for trouble in general because these kids know that their mother and father are probably blind drunk at an adult Halloween party and left the kids explicit instruction to be inside their homes after trick or treat.
To make matter worse we get bombarded with stern doe eyed law enforcement officials surrounded by even sterner looking government bureaucrats extolling the virtues of eating celery and carrot sticks instead of that evillllll candy.
The other day I was thinking that Halloween is about the only event on the calendar that the athiests are bitching about. Oh I'm quite sure that some group will feel offended and Halloween will be rescinded as a function.
You know something? Every time adults get involved with something they screw it up and ruin it for everyone like calling Christmas, "Winter Solstice Diversity Day."

Black Sabbath| 10.29.10 @ 9:04AM

Great comment!

Sheila| 10.29.10 @ 12:00PM

Excellent comment, Melvin. I, too, remember when Halloween was a time for kids to dress up, go out after dark, and get candy. Decorations usually consisted of construction-paper pumpkins and black cats made in school. Now, it's the adults who spend more time and money on costumes than children, and women with too much time on their hands decorate their homes with store-bought skulls and made-in-China electronic gadgets to rival Christmas. Meanwhile, in my culturally enriched neighborhood, I have had no trick-or-treaters in about five years - most Asian families go out all together and leave their homes dark, and most Pakistanis stay home and keep their homes dark. A couple of times a few carloads of Hispanics from the other side of town trolled the neighborhood. I was one of the last on my block to keep my light on; no more. Add to this most churches and Christian schools tarring the holiday as demonic and evil, and the Halloween I knew and loved as a child has pretty much been killed off. I'm well aware of the pagan origins of the holiday, the Celtic Day of the Dead, and the church's addition of All Hallow's Eve. My own kids, educated at Christian schools, were never allowed to dress as anything demonic or evil, and our home decorations consisted of a pumpkin carved with dad, and they had a great time (and somehow were never corrupted into pagans - amazing, huh?). It still irks me, every October, that eternal adolescents, political correctness, and narrow religiosity have turned what was a particularly American, post WWII exuberant holiday for children into just another day.

LibertyJen| 10.31.10 @ 10:04PM

What neighborhoods are you all living in? In some places it might be this bad and all the kids are trick-or-treating at the mall. But we had 200 kids come up to our house to pet our dog and get some candy. We nearly ran out of goodies despite buying 7 big bags, several neighbors had to turn off the porch lights early because they did run out, and everyone had a wonderful time. I'm sorry, but Americana is not dead everywhere.

Louis Jenkins| 10.29.10 @ 8:22AM

Give them the boot! The liberals have always got something to complain about. And now its their favorite time of the year. Gouls dressed up like Nancy Pelosi, or Harry Reid, the horrible of horribles-Obama, and yet they still complain. I think we should take a play from the liberals hand book- when a kid walks up to your door, take candy from him, afterall, it needs re-distribution to those kids less fortunate.

Colopure Cleanse| 10.29.10 @ 9:11AM

I actually spent the whole time crying with my cousin and the men with chainsaws continued chasing us. Apparently their not supposed to touch you with them but they touched my aunts leg. It didnt hurt or nothing & Its all in good fun and I suppose I would go back, its just terrifying at the time.

Petronius| 10.29.10 @ 9:46AM

The half life of any urban legend gets extended by repetition. But I have yet to see the first malevolent, misanthropic, maniacal old bastard who allegedly hates everybody under retirement age get frog marched before the cameras on the 10 o'clock for sticking a straight pin in a Mars bar, and putting it in a child's loot bag.
Risk is a given in a Free society. Live with it, or be vewy afwaid.

Patrick| 10.29.10 @ 3:51PM

Usually misanthropic, maniacal, old bastards stick to giving out candy corn. For a small child it may as well be a lead brick in their bags, because they sure aren't going to eat it.

Le Cracquere| 10.29.10 @ 8:17PM

Speaking for misanthropic, maniacal, old bastards everywhere, I find that orange "circus peanuts" yield far superior returns in misery. MwaHAHUHAHUHAHAHA...

Patrick| 10.30.10 @ 3:37PM

I suppose that's just because you didn't do your research on the familial/schoolyard marketplace. While a large majority of children loathe circus peanuts, there is a small minority that will trade FOR them. They, of course, get maximum trade value, perhaps as much as their whole take in peanuts for one Snickers. The same trading is found with the peanut butter flavored toffee and black licorice flavored jelly beans at Easter.

Of course, since nobody really likes nor really hates the candy corn, it just ends up as weight in the bag, and is usually thrown out in February.

tjsker| 10.29.10 @ 10:06AM

Some points:

1) This is just another example of elected officials thinking they know more than everybody else. Here's a hint candidates: We elect you because we think you're the most qualified of all the AVAILABLE candidates to achieve our agenda, not because we thought you were Carnac.

2) It's hard to understand how some myths just won't die. Maybe we're more comfortable letting others think for ourselves than just using a little of our own common sense. I'm still seeing signs on gas pumps saying not to use your cell phone.

3) More to the point. Halloween is for kids, so let them come. I get over 250 at my door each Halloween and I don't mind buying candy for them one bit, I've spent money on worse things. I'm going to watch some football, eat some gumbo, drink a beer and maybe a bloody mary, and hand out candy to smiling princesses and tiny Frankenstein's. So bring it on kids, I'm ready for ya.

Melvin| 10.29.10 @ 10:38AM

Thanks for the memories. To a kid, Halloween was the start of the special time. Halloween cookies brought in by the teacher, the lunch lady dressed up like, "An evil lunch lady." During the week, kids used to get into their costumes and wear them school and teachers would have contests who was the scariest.
Next came Turkey Day, and we were already bugging dad to go out and get a Christmas tree. Turkey Day was amazing, the windows were all steamed up from mom's cooking and it was cold out and when we came in from outside the smell of heaven greeted us. Dad said Grace and we were off to the races of mom's cornucopia of goodies.
Christmas, nothing, and I mean nothing could hold a candle to Christmas. Christmas was the pinnacled of celebrations to a kid. From the Salvation Army bell ringer, where dad or mom slipped a fiver into my hand to put into the bucket. Christmas decorations were everywhere, lights, trees, Christmas songs being played down main-street.
The stores competed who had the best decorations, the employees were dressed up as elves or Mrs. Santa. Nothing cheesy mind you, they went all out and all a kid could do was stand there with their mouth agape and say, "Wow."
My family wasn't into the religious aspect, but we did acknowledge the baby Jesus at Christmas.
Families don't know today what their missing, because when us old guys take our celestial dirt naps, the legend of Christmas, Turkey Day and even Halloween will die with us, and they will be left with, "Happy Winter Solstice Diveristy Day."
Of course that was when America was united, unlike today nothing more than a bunch of bitching little groups, complaining about everything and anything.
They can take the lights, Santa, and the baby Jesus in the manger, but there is one thing they can't have, and that is Christmas how it is supposed to be in my mind. Because in my mind at Christmas time, I still standing there in Meir & Franks hanging on to my sisters going, "Wow."

Patrick| 10.29.10 @ 3:54PM

Must be nice. Sure I'm in the city, but most people in my immediate area are retirees. Usually we get between two and six children.

Also, thanks for reminding me, I need to get more horseradish and celery salt.

Martin| 10.29.10 @ 10:44AM

While I like to go "Trick or Drink" the fact is that the best posts-Halloween trick was the 95 Thesis.

Patrick| 10.29.10 @ 3:57PM

I was unaware that Martin Luther also TP'ed the cathedral.

KB| 10.29.10 @ 10:44AM

I was never a big fan of Halloween, even as a kid. Growing up on the Canadian prairies it was often getting extremely cold by that time, and the need to bundle up against the elements often mitigated the effect of most costumes. The main reason though is that even as a kid I disliked most candy (w/the notable exception of chocolate). Nonethess, that was MY quirk and not one that was shared by many of my little friends at the time and to each his/her own you know?

My present day irriattion with Halloween has nothing to do with trick or treaters. As other posters here have already pointed out, in some neighborhoods they have all but disappeared (and more's the pity). Rather, it seems to me that it has become yet one more event that used to be primarily for kids that has now been taken over by adults who refuse to grow up. Running parrallel with the restrictons/bans/etc on kids trick or treating are adult halloween parties that some years seem to go on for at least a week and the embarrassing office displays of middle-aged middle management types in costume while at work either being too eager to flaunt their not so inner child or in obvious discomfort but feeling obligated to go along with all the nonsense lest they be labeled a stick in the mud or worse, "not a team player". Now THAT is a horror show, and not a particularly entertaining one at that

KyMouse| 10.29.10 @ 10:57AM

Every Halloween, I'm tempted to put a sign in my yard that says, "If you think I'm going to poison your children, don't send them here to beg for something to eat!"

But I still enjoy seeing kids come by our house in their costumes, so I give out nickels. If there are any left over at the end of the evening, I can spend them, not eat them as I would candy.

There is a street in my neighborhood that has so many houses decorated in creative ways (including homemade animated and "flying" creatures), there are an estimated 5,000 kids on the sidewalks on Halloween. The kids don't expect to get candy -- in fact, the homeowners put out baskets in which visitors deposit canned food and other items for local homeless shelters.

This year, local government is pressuring the homeowners on that street (we're talking about only three blocks on one street!) to buy permits if they're going to have such crowd-attracting decorations. I suppose the idea is to compensate the city for the inevitable traffic congestion, which probaby requires a few traffic cops.

For a peek, see "Hillcrest Avenue Halloween" on YouTube.

KyMouse| 10.29.10 @ 4:56PM

A clearer video is YouTube's "Haunted Hillcrest Avenue."

KyMouse| 11.1.10 @ 8:06AM

I'm not sure that Hillcrest Avenue's Halloween festivities are doing any damage in the military, but I like the idea that it might damage a government agency or two.

Dixie Pixie| 10.29.10 @ 1:52PM

I have a general question for anyone.
Who or what organizations would benefit from the elimination of Halloween.

No it was not the Evangelical Christians.
The attacks are coming from the left-wing of the social spectrum.
A good question is why.

Patrick| 10.29.10 @ 4:07PM

Likely because it is a reminder of death and preternatural evil.

Dwelling on either of these things might possibly lead someone to be introspective for a moment, which is the killing curse to degenerate liberals.

Dixie Pixie| 10.29.10 @ 5:10PM

Patrick that is a good but generalized answer.

However the media does not do anything for free.
So who is paying the bills for Halloween suppression????

Wm Paterson| 10.29.10 @ 5:36PM

What is the most frightening of recent developments in Halloween costumes? The "Sexy" version of everything... including even things like Sexy Freddie Krueger. I don't believe that having a fat belly or huge rear hanging out of a ripped and/or skimpy costume should be considered sexy; frightening, yes. Leave sexy to the professionals.

Perusha| 10.29.10 @ 7:37PM

Ah, how we all adapt to so much that isn’t true!

I grew up in the 50’s, in the Northwest, and kids were always outside, weather permitting, playing all kinds of games, usually until dark. We had so much fun, and in the bad weather we played board games and all kinds of cards.

Around about the time “missing children” started getting their faces on milk cartons, what, thirty years ago, “responsible” parents began tightening the apron strings, and fewer and fewer children were to be seen.

As a Harry Truman-like walker, this almost bothered me, but as a math major, I decided to look at the facts. Since I always love taking a army-like march at night, in the dark, when all the fear and angst made it CW that this was STUPID, I checked the crime statistics for my neighborhood, at that time.

Of course, I was lucky to be in Mill Valley, Marin County, California, so besides having a well paid and efficient police force, hardly anything ever happened. And, the fights and such were usually at bars, etc.

Remember when this crazy guy kidnapped a girl in the hills above the cities in Marin---a David somebody, I believe. This made me stop and consider whether my lovely long hikes up in the glorious hills---all the way to the coast, sometimes---was wise, but I figured the chances were too low for any problems.

BTW, here’s a “hike” joke---

A guy goes up a trail to the top, starting at 8 A.M. on Monday. He stays at the top, and comes down starting at 8 A.M. on Tuesday. Is there a spot on the trail that is the same time for him going up AND coming down? If you think yes, how can you explain or prove it?

Answer---later, gator!

First, let me rant about my own reaction to the scared silly parenting hoax, that made the streets mostly empty.

After bemoaning this for a while, I realized that this was good for ME! It meant I didn’t have to go far to be in my own “private” area! And, since I am a male, it dawned on me that a whole lot of brainwashed people would see me as a---threat. Of course, I NEVER acted like one, in any way.

Nowadays, on my hikes, even though the local high school is nearby, since most kids ride the bus, I only see a few of them before or after school. Me, I pity the fools!

It was always so much fun to get out of school, say in the fall on a day like today, and commune with the trees as they lost their leaves. Indeed, the same was true in the cold weather, as well, not to mention spring, eh?

Here’s the answer to the “joke”---

Of course there’s a place that’s the same time. Pretend there are TWO different guys, one going up and one coming down, starting at 8:00. They HAVE TO MEET, somewhere!

Quite Easily Done

Reyol| 10.29.10 @ 8:50PM

Don't forget those sexy adult Halloween parties. Now Halloween is for the kids who never grew up - not the real ones. It's getting harder and harder to find good trick-or-treat neighborhoods.

Patrick| 10.30.10 @ 3:39PM

Well, that's how it goes. I wonder why people don't grow up anymore. Hmmm....

I know the answer, but it doesn't mean I still don't wonder.

Jive Bomber| 10.31.10 @ 3:05AM

When I was a trick and treating kid, the one home to avoid was that of one Mr. Crouch. Why? Never mind that on any day he was rumored to be, by us kids, the neighborhood ogre. We stayed away on Halloween because we kiddies heard (from a reliable source!) that old man Crouch roasted pennies in a skillet, dumped them in a metal bowl, and offered that to unsuspecting trick or treaters while bellowing a hearty "grab a handful, kid!"
(HAD that been true, my dad would have beat the daylights out of him, but, of course, it was as much rubbish as razors in apples.)
With that type paranoia, the kids of today miss out on a lot of good Halloween loot. We didn't settle for "fun size" candy bars. No, we went to the homes we knew dispensed caramel apples (sans razor), popcorn balls, or cupcakes. All proffered on a platter by a smiling neighbor lady.
And naturally, if she gypped us by handing out a dab of candy corn, her windows would mutely bear the evidence of her transgression.

LibertyJen| 10.31.10 @ 10:23PM

Jive Bomber, that sounds like such fun. I can't tell you how many times I wish I could give the trick-or-treating kids cupcakes or caramel apples, too, but I know that no mothers other than those who actually know me would let their kids eat them. It's a bit of a shame...But then again, I'd get nothing else done all week, aside from baking away in the kitchen! It'd probably be worth it, though. Sigh.

JeffT| 11.2.10 @ 12:31PM

I came to the conclusion years ago not to believe most of what the "experts" tell us. Media plays on our fears. Fear of kids being snatched at random, milk cartons adorned with pictures of missing children, fear of apples, fear of air, fear of water, fear of wives being beaten on Super Bowl day, et al. All of these things turn out to be complete fabrications. Groups with vested interests play the media like a fiddle. The compliant and duped media spread the word of these myths, never having to say "Oops, we were wrong," and just moving on to the next scare tactic. Rush pegged it years ago by calling them "The Drive-By Media." Create chaos, record the results, report it as "news," then move on to the next story.

Christian Louboutin| 6.23.11 @ 5:41AM

The most horrifying stories are those in which the antagonist intentionally, but inexplicably, inflicts pain on innocent victims. The more irrational or unreasonable the villain, the more horrifying.