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Political Hay
Ready for Their Closeups
Watching the Dems as if in a silent movie.
The other night, I happened to flip on Turner Classic Movies and came upon a film called The Student Prince in Old Heidelberg. This was a silent version of a novel that became an operetta by Sigmund Romberg and was most famous as a movie musical starring Mario Lanza in 1954. Having seen the Lanza film many times, I watched the silent for a while and although I missed the wonderful singing, I nonetheless could follow the plot, familiar as I was with the story itself.
Similarly, I have enjoyed watching the silent version of Showboat that was filmed on the cusp of the talkie era in 1929. Again, I rate the 1936 adaptation of the Kern/Hammerstein musical much higher — the scene with Irene Dunne doing the shuffle with Hattie McDaniel is alone worth the price of admission — but the silent version essentially tells the same story.
Many folks disdain all older films and especially the silents as primitive and unentertaining, given that there is no spoken dialogue. And this always makes me laugh given what passes for witty repartee in modern movies. But just as a picture has always been worth a thousand words, much of the subtitling was deemed unnecessary, as when a damsel waved goodbye to her hero at the train station; there are just some things you can comprehend merely by looking at them. This got me to thinking about the upcoming mid-term elections as I watched the evening news; so many are the liberal scenes to which we’ve become accustomed that need no oral embellishment.
Now in days past, liberal presidents were better spoken than the current occupant of the Oval Office. But with Barack Obama and the current crop of Democrats, after we have read copies of their speeches beforehand — or even when we haven’t — we need not turn up the volume on our TV sets: we know exactly what they’re going to say. So now that the election season is upon us, let me be your guide to what would be a blessing from heaven: liberal silent movies — no teleprompters needed.
In our first scene, a white Democrat is seen exiting a black church arm in arm with the pastor and either Al Sharpton or Jesse Jackson, which denotes one of two things. If this takes place from August to November, it is to demonstrate that he is a friend to all those who are “down for the struggle.” Now if it is not an election cycle, and the liberal is merely carrying a bible in hand with a painful look of contrition on his face, no subtitle will be necessary, only the poignant sound of a tinkly piano and the tear leaking out of one eye.
An old standby that is almost a requirement out on the hustings are scenes where liberal nerds like John Kerry attempt to be portrayed as average guys playing football or Al Gore paddling a canoe. But the most telling scene is when liberals are photographed while hunting to demonstrate their love for the kinds of firearms that only kill animals. You don’t need to actually hear them say it to know that they were raised by their pappies to hunt n’ shoot before they could walk.
Almost as popular as gun-loving liberals out on the campaign trail is the sight of them scarfing down all sorts of food they would otherwise never allow to cross the thresholds of their homes let alone their gullets. A wonderful combination of the two comes from the erudite Joe Biden who, proving that liberals are their own subtitles, said at a fish fry in Castlewood, Virginia. in 2008: “I guarantee you Barack Obama ain’t taking my shotguns, so don’t buy that malarkey.”
Another scene guaranteed to take place is on election day itself, when the cameras will follow our intrepid heroes to a polling place they’ve surely never seen before, all the while demonstrating the kind of retch-inducing forced familiarity that makes dialogue for all of these scenes utterly superfluous. They can glad-hand the hoi polloi all they like; we’ve seen this movie before.
And probably the worst of all climaxes — a horror scene actually — is when a group of liberals stand smiling before a podium at the Capitol in the second week of November to announce…well, anything. We don’t need any audio or graphics to know that things are about to get seriously worse. But hopefully, this is one scene that will remain on the cutting room floor this year.
Letter to the Editor View all comments (30) | Leave a comment
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Appleby| 9.17.10 @ 7:30AM
And any time a politician has a child as a prop beside him, hide the women, the kids and your wallet, because whatever is coming next will be bad for all three.
albert constantine jr.| 9.17.10 @ 8:44AM
I, too, use to cringe whenever I heard a politician use the phrase "for the children". I now understand that the last part is frequently left out. In a less abridged version, it is "for the children (and their children, and their children) to pay ...".
Maddox| 9.17.10 @ 10:45AM
And it is for their children (and their children, and their children) to inherit the benefits of their schemes to steal from us.
David W| 9.18.10 @ 12:01AM
What children. With the desire to allow unfettered choice for women, how many children will actually be born to pay for all of the spending :-)
Alan Brooks| 9.17.10 @ 11:11PM
"Now in days past, liberal presidents were better spoken than the current occupant of the Oval Office."
I'll take Obama over Jimmy "Malaise" Carter any day of the week, any year of a decade.
Ken Roberts | 9.18.10 @ 5:52PM
I think I would have to give them both an F, you take one you got the other any way .
Chalkdust| 9.18.10 @ 10:58PM
"I'll take Obama........" Say no more he's yours, no thanks required.
Alan Brooks| 9.19.10 @ 12:02AM
What about president "read my lips, no new taxes":
A false prophet, in spades.
audax| 9.20.10 @ 3:03AM
And THAT's why he was rejected at the polls for an even bigger lier!
Bill Quantrill| 9.17.10 @ 8:01AM
"The Democrats are big! It's the pictures that got small."--Rep. Norma Pelosi (D-Sunset Blvd.)
Sam Vaughn| 9.17.10 @ 8:38AM
Whenever a politician or their media propagandists say we have a crisis I reach for my wallet, my freedom and my property. Perhaps the scene is one of an old Irish politician (sorry Muintir na hÉireann, na hÉireannaigh, na Gaedhil, very un PC remark) in black top hat, black lont tail coat cradling a baby's head in one arm while stealing it's lollypop (gameboy) with the other. There is a political ad there someplace,,,,,
JimH| 9.17.10 @ 9:17AM
Of course we should just tell them to pugue mahone. Thats about the limit of my Gaelic skills.
olainfree| 9.17.10 @ 9:12AM
Add to these predictable stunts by Dems are the boilerplate lectures during certain holidays of the year: Labor Day, MLK's birthday and Black History month, the beginning and end of Islamic holy days, Women'x History month, Cinco de Mayo. These are the "approved" events for Dem righteousness (as if the nation abuses the celebrants otherwise).
If I missed any, please feel free to add to the list.
Charles Martel| 9.19.10 @ 10:33PM
How could you forget Gay Pride Week? A high holiday for Pelosi and the pederasts.
Mark Shepler- Jupiter, FL| 9.17.10 @ 9:22AM
I remember one liberal scene from 1994, definitely the talkie era, that I'd like to see again. It is a true story though some of the words may have changed...
SET UP: The day after the historic election in which Dems were wiped out. Both the house and Senate went over to the Reps for the first time in 60 years, the House in 40. Senators Barbara Milkowski joined by a few others who had survived the slaughter file somberly into the capital press room to commiserate with their media brethren. It's obvious they're there to garner sympathy and rally the troops to defend liberalism. After all, didn't Peter Jennings say America threw a "temper tantrum" late the night before? Faces set with determination, demeanor funereal.
PRESSROOM: It's just another day however in the press room as the group mounts the dais. People are chatting, laughing, on the phone, coming and going, chairs and doors bang off-camera. Somebody calls out across the room.
POOL CAMERA: Stares unblinkingly at top of front row and first few feet of dais. Only Senator's lower legs visible in frame.
MICROPHONE: Hot
SEN. MILKULSKI- (Taps mike, lowered voice): Is this thing on?... I don't think it's on... (Begins Sister Mary Elephant imitation; call to order): Today..... We're he're... Ahhh...HELLO?!?!?!... If we could just....ahhh...
DEM SEN. #1- (lowered voice): They're...not...settling...down...
DEM SEN. #2- (hisses): It's crazy in here....
(Pause a couple of beats)
SEN. MILKULSKI- (quiet, dejected tone): They used to stand up when we came in...
Maddox| 9.17.10 @ 10:51AM
Hopefully the encore to that scene will be played out in November. We will hear the same tired old lines about bi-partisanship and the country being tired of political fighting then too. This means "go along with liberals and don't argue." We see where that has gotten us. We aren't paying for the tickets to that show anymore.
Mark Shepler- Jupiter, FL| 9.17.10 @ 11:18AM
Yep. The next two scenes in that movie were of a beaming Phil Gramm the same morning announcing "the civil war is over", meaning of course, the historic realignment of the S0uth to the Republican party. The next was the Trent Lott and Gingrich announcing their "power sharing" agreement with the Dems like a couple of whipped curs who, after years and decades of #2 status, just didn't know how to act like the alpha male of the pack.
Here's hoping for better in Nov.
DesertFlower| 9.19.10 @ 2:28AM
This is ALWAYS the problem with Republicans once they get to Washington, DC. They do not know how to be alpha males (or females), do not have the cojones to wield power once they've got it . They are so blomin' worried that someone might call them heartless if they stand up for fiscal responsibility (the media are always happy to oblige), so afraid they'll be dropped from the DC party circuit.
Yes indeed, here's hoping for better in Nov!
DesertFlower| 9.19.10 @ 2:30AM
Meant to say bloomin' worried, not blomin'.
Howard| 9.17.10 @ 3:54PM
The olden day liberal was more in touch with real people. Hubert Humphrey as opposed to John Forbes Kerry. Even JFK made the appearance of understanding the regular Joe. Today's Liberal's are golfing in Martha s' Vineyard, and flying in private jets.
jomo2009| 9.17.10 @ 4:28PM
Even though he was a no-good Communist, Paul Robeson's version of "Ol' Man River" is still the standard.
PCP Smoker| 9.17.10 @ 7:08PM
"But the most telling scene is when liberals are photographed while hunting to demonstrate their love for the kinds of firearms that only kill animals."
True, but don't forget John "Fucking" Kerry's classic line in Ohio: "Can I git me a hunting license?" That was terribly convincing. Salt of the earth character heading into the wilds to "git" some grub for him and his clan.
I have always wondered what was on his mind as he reflected on his performance while sitting on his private jet heading home.
WR Jonas | 9.18.10 @ 11:33AM
Three thoughts to keep you going .
1. The House Majority leader demanding the keys to the plane.
2. Harry Reids farewell speech to the troops.
3. The stark and soul shaking fear when the Dems realize their Party is about to split in two, or three .
P-Daddy| 9.18.10 @ 4:51PM
A spot on article......
The DNC playbook is what it is, no originality and playing to the lowest common denominator.....dumbed down by decades of 7 second news bites, NEA controlled education and promises of a golden future fabricated off the the fallacy that the DNC is the party of the "working man". The ruling class gets down in the gutters once every two, four or six years, depending on the need based on their particular vulnerability in that election cycle....to mix it up with the unwashed to show solidarity and understanding of their constituents struggle against the "man". If they only understood that the enemy of their future stands amongst them during said photo ops. The electorate is being woke up and they are beginning to weigh, measure and find the elite caste is found wanting.
Sidebar....some of the best movies are those that are in black and white. "The Thin Man" is one of my personal favorites, compared to today's movies where these people stare at each other and grunt barely discernable mumblings, I say bring on the "talkies" anyday.
Mike Bergsma| 9.18.10 @ 6:20PM
the link to Showboat is the best part of this article. Amazing.
Otis Criblecoblis | 9.19.10 @ 1:28AM
Gee, I enjoyed your opening premise so much that I was sorry you moved off it so quickly. Another story that shines particularly well in its silent version is Ben-Hur; its 1925 version with Ramon Novarro actually tells the story in greater detail than the sound version in considerably less time, and the silent chariot scene is to me just as thrilling as the later one.
Don L| 9.19.10 @ 7:56AM
Liberals are their own subtitles?
How about liberals need no captions.
I'm most entertained by the obligitory silly scene with the ill or dying child next to the candidate with the clear implications that the cruel GOP did this.
scotchieguy| 9.20.10 @ 4:10AM
The ultimate BS moment came from the ultimate BS president in history--william jefferson clinton. He was at a funeral (Ron Brown?) and he was yukking it up w/ his sycophants, and suddenly he noticed a camera, and did his typical "bite my lip, look sullen BS" he was so famous for. It was almost as if he had an ear-piece and in it was piped a voice who said--OK, now look like you are seriously grieving, this will be your Kodak moment for the evening news...jeeeeeez!
A close second. I don't know why this always bothered me, but it reminded me of the reason I HATED high school for its phoniness. Yes, another Clinton. The Bitch, er--Hillary. Any given speech, any given time, there was the moment, esp during '08 primary season, where she would point to some inmaginary person in the crowd, and acknowledge them like she hasn't seen them in 20 years. She had this unbelievable bullshit expression on her face that screamed--I am a phony!!! It became so predictable, that I lilterally couldn't watch her until she actually started speaking. Man, what an absolute disingenuous fraud!