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Another Perspective
Devil's Work
Professions hated by large numbers of people for two hundred, Alex.
"In Moulmein, in lower Burma, I was hated by large numbers of people -- the only time in my life that I have been important enough for this to happen to me," begins George Orwell in his classic essay "Shooting an Elephant."
I know the feeling. My day job is investigative reporter. That means I, too, am hated by large numbers of people, and not for the usual reasons people hate the press (we're "unethical, biased"), but because I tend to ask a lot of uncomfortable questions. Those who wish me ill include nearly everyone in local government, including elected officials, bureaucrats, school administrators -- basically everyone on the public dole, an outcome most thick-skinned reporters would wear as a badge of honor.
Fortunately, my fiancée is also hated by large numbers of people, so we can commiserate. She is a social worker who works with inner city families on child abuse cases. She has been threatened and called a "baby snatcher" countless times. The fear of the child abuse worker has been largely exaggerated by the know-nothings who write for television and films. The last thing a social worker wants to do is tear a child away from its mother and try to find someone -- often a hopeless task -- to care for him. A mother really has to be messed up before it comes to that.
Not to be outdone is my brother the attorney. He's not just any attorney, but a corporate attorney. And not just any corporation, but one of those large multi-nationals liberals think of as evil incarnate. He, too, wears this as a badge of honor.
For years I worked as a public relations man for an association of lawyers. My job was to get people to change their opinion of the profession. (It would have been easier to convince people to change their sex.) If I was able to sleep at night, it was only by constantly reminding myself that I was supporting a family.
There are no politicians in our family as yet, though my father, at age 75, is considering a run for the city council. If elected, my family will have all the most hated professions accounted for.
Judging by the number of "most-hated profession" stories I've read, such lists are indeed a popular pastime. My own catalogue would likewise put journalists, politicians, and lawyers near the top, edging out the traffic cop, who has slipped a few rungs since I bought a radar detector. Certainly, there should be a special circle of hell reserved for advertising people. A generation ago, before advertising masterminds dreamt up such inspired campaigns as the Budweiser "What's Up" commercials, Malcolm Muggeridge said that "history will see advertising as one of the real evil things of our time. It is stimulating people constantly to want things, want this, want that," which is refreshing to hear in a conservative thinker. I know, ad men are just doing their jobs, spewing out puerile swill to the great unwashed, but that doesn't excuse them. So were Bonnie and Clyde just doing their jobs.
A RECENT POLL in Britain found that the most hated professionals were the lowly meter maids. No one likes finding parking tickets on his windshield, but if I'm going to hate someone for it it's going to be the elected officials who are responsible for the meters in the first place. Parking meters have never made much sense to me, particularly in these days of suburban malls. Shouldn't cities be encouraging shoppers to drive into the city to shop rather than punishing them for it?
Traditionally, Americans have disliked "oily" used car salesmen and "greedy" bankers, but I have nothing against either profession. Perhaps because I buy my used cars from acquaintances, while I suspect bankers -- if anything -- have been too free in lending money, thereby contributing to the current economic mess.
I still distrust auto mechanics, though I suspect they cheat women customers far more often than men, even men like myself who don't know an alternator from a generator. And credit card companies remain the very essence of evil, playing as they do on the moral weaknesses of the masses.
Do I mind being hated by so many people? Not particularly, though it does make a reporter's job more difficult when people refuse to talk to you because they hate you. But at least I am no longer doing spin for lawyers. And, yes, I've never slept better.
About the Author
Christopher Orlet writes from St. Louis and is a frequent contributor to The American Spectator Online.
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Jack Olson| 9.9.10 @ 7:49AM
Mr. Orlet, lawyers usually explain their bad reputation as the work of a small minority who besmirch the honor of the honest majority. Yet, I notice that that supposedly great majority of honest lawyers does nothing to disbar any but the worst of the dishonest. Only one in two thousand lawyers is disbarred each year and only one disbarment in ten is permanent. If lawyers stink because it doesn't take many skunks to befoul an entire crowd of people, then the crowd of people can either organize a skunk hunt or continue to stink. Lawyers prefer to stink.
Ryan| 9.9.10 @ 8:46AM
I think the other side of it is that even scumbags need representation.
Patrick| 9.9.10 @ 1:58PM
Representing a scumbag does not make you a scumbag, unless your actions to represent said scumbag are scummy.
Sadly, the lawyer performing the representation behaves in a more scummy manner than either party in contention.
mad libertarian guy| 9.9.10 @ 3:52PM
That's funny because I would say the EXACT same thing about cops.
The only good ones are those few who actively fight against rampant abuses of power that happen in every district in America.
And by few, I mean virtually none.
Petronius| 9.9.10 @ 8:55AM
You left out the non-profit advocacy groups who promulgate more onerous laws taking away our Freedom; MADD, Public Citizen, ASH, unAmericn Lung Assn. Citizens for evilScience in the Selfserving Interest. NAACP, HSUSA, Sierra Club, EDF, Earth First, NEA, ad nauseum. These political parasites make it big while stifling the constructive commerce of their target enemies.
H. L. Mencken exposed them ages ago. Read The Dry Millennium in his Second Series of Prejudices.
The proclaimed ideals and ends are bogus.
"It is the chase that heats up the great mob of Methodists, not the word. And the fact that the chase is unjust on tickles them the more, for to do injustice with impunity is a sign of power, and power is the thing that the inferior man always craves most violently."
Off the prigs!!
Dan Hirsch| 9.9.10 @ 9:31AM
The Oxford English Dictionary defines a profession, in the career sense, as one that requires extensive training and formal qualification.
Medical professionals work with the realities of biology, physics, and chemistry; if they don't like the way things are, they are working within the constraints of reality.
Engineers operate under the same constraints, misunderstand the rules and the damn building or damn plane falls down; death, destruction, and lawsuits to follow.
Lawyers, accountants, financial professionals operate ostensibly under man made rules. The rules can be ignored with some hazard of professional sanction, but the building won't fall down if they err, overlook, lie, cheat, or otherwise misbehave. You, their customer, may be cheated of your rightful earnings, property, liberty, or other valuables, but generally you are not dead. What recourse do you have? You can always engage another similar professional and a lawyer to attempt to recover your losses. Good luck with that.
Currently two lawyers opposing each other in a civil suit have a blatant conflict of interest; if they settle quickly, they make very little money. If they prolong, complicate, and confuse things, drawing the suit out in length and breadth, ensnaring others, and generally insuring lots of billable hours for everybody. Paid for by the hapless clients. Smart attorneys know the financial condition of the parties to the suit and tailor the prosecution of the case to maximize their billable hours.
In criminal cases, you add government attorneys into the mix who have a client that can print their own money, an individual in their crosshairs (deservedly or not) inevitably balances their financial condition against their personal freedom and with the rate being the defense teams hourly charges - their secretaries cost you $75/hour. Ever hear of a prosecution that took two weeks, not two years? Of course not. Ask Blagojoveich, Tom Delay, Scooter Libby, Bill Clinton, anybody whose ever been under a prosecutor's knife.
Is there hope for this fundamentally flawed system?
Yes, the inherent conflict of interest - can be resolved simply. We need to implement "Loser pays." This encourages that parties who are in the wrong can reduce the financial impact of the suit by settling and settling quickly to minimize the attorneys' billings. It discourages frivolous filings as a judgement against them will come with a bill for the other party's attorneys. But truly wronged parties who prevail will not bear the burden of the attorneys' fares.
Much of the civilized world prospers under this system; their attorneys not so much. But the only way this could ever happen here is by popular uprising. No professional legislator would ever seriously and actively pursue it.
Unless he or she were decidedly Reaganseque.
Bob K.| 9.9.10 @ 9:53AM
Mr. Orlet,
Most people don't hate Investigative Journalists. They are sophisticated enough to know that your articles will be twisted, adjusted, truncated and even spiked by your editors or publisher if they do not meet their political requirements or might hurt their financial interests. They also know they have to be exceedingly wary when talking casually to you about any subject under the sun! They could end up being some unidentified fool in an article you are writing if you disagree with them when all they were doing is making some conversation. It has also been my experience that many Investigative Reporters have trouble finding the men's room in a courthouse nor can they can radar in on the correct bureaucrat to talk to because they don't know how to find a depth chart which will show who is really in charge. In most places this is the State or County Phone Directory. They also seem to never learn that these people are like packs of wolves in their mentality and like wolves they are frightened of both Heat and Light, the threat of which should be used in abundance when dealing with them.
Lawyers are different. I worked closely with a lot of them and many are still my friends. Indeed, my brother is one too. I don't mind telling him or the others who will still talk to me that they often can be real pains in the butt and when someone tells you to "get it in writing" when you talk to them, it is good advice. And too many of them act as if they don't need to talk to you unless they can bill you by the minute!
Citizen Jerry| 9.9.10 @ 10:10AM
Every profession has its noble practitioners and its incompetents. But I do wonder sometimes whether law students must take a required class in how to be smug, arrogant and condescending.
We need legal practitioners for a civilized society. My nephew is one of them. What really irks me is those who get rich off other people's misery.
Larry in Iowa| 9.9.10 @ 10:35AM
Lawyers are not necessarily bad on an individual basis. Occasionally some even serve a useful purpose. But like grasshoppers, too many constitutes a plague. We'd be better off with a lot fewer of them.
Wee Willie| 9.9.10 @ 11:28AM
Plaintiffs lawyers when starting a lawsuit should have to chose between one of three options.
1) Loser pays legal fees.
2) a cap on earnings limited to hours or total reimbursement.
3) The plaintiff lawyers be subject to cross- examination. Thus if they are overblowing a minor silly point they can be called to account.
Jack Olson| 9.9.10 @ 11:44AM
In 1996, the American Bar Association agreed to a consent decree which prohibited it from abusing law school accreditation. Their past abuses included fixing faculty salaries, boycotting state-accredited law schools by restricting their graduates from enrolling in ABA-accredited schools, and by boycotting for-profit law schools. By 2006, the ABA admitted violating six provisions of the consent decree and agreed to reimburse the Department of Justice for its expenses in petitioning the District Court of D.C. to hold the ABA in civil contempt. (Source: USDOJ, 6/23/2006). What is the public to think of a guild of lawyers who (1) either don't know or don't care that they're breaking the anti-trust laws, (2) when caught, agree to refrain from doing so in future, and (3) continue to flout both the law and their own agreement? Would honest men do that?
Tex Expatriate| 9.9.10 @ 3:05PM
If your father enters politics, you will indeed have a a corner on four of the most hated occupations (I hesitate to call journalism, lawyering, social work, or holding political office professions). I never met an honest lawyer, an unbiased reporter, honest office holder, or competent social worker who wasn't also a psychotherapist. I'm seventy-three years old.
gary siebel| 9.9.10 @ 3:38PM
You forgot one (at least). Cab drivers are held in even worse regard than lawyers.
pomdter| 9.9.10 @ 3:59PM
I put the police on my list, mostly due to their differences with the fire dept.
Both groups are needed to be on call in case there's a bank robbery or a fire, but 95% of the time they are pretty much idle.
So, while the firemen use their spare time to raise money for the MDA & cancer research, the cops use their spare time to harass & fine every day people because they didn't come to a complete stop at an empty intersection...
Karl Marx| 9.9.10 @ 5:14PM
Social workers get a vote in my book as useless at best and dangerous at worst. Maybe they don't aspire to steal children in your jurisdiction, but there are many jusrisdictions that will encourage them to do just that in order to obtain federal dollars for foster care. Then there is the gross bias they show against fathers in divorce cases as well. Social workers have been made into the point of the wedge intended to drive fathers from the family and hasten the demise of the traditional nuclear family, which their literature mostly views as an evil to be cut out of society, by force if necessary. Most are serious leftwing and feminist ideologues. They need to dig their own graves along with the lawyers.
Big Daddy Andy| 9.10.10 @ 6:07PM
Mr. Orlet's better half would probably not fit in well with our local Child Protective Services office because she is married, heterosexual, and better looking than a troll. It also sounds like she might actually care for the welfare of children instead of being a malcontent and jaded cog in the State's "constituent management" machine, and that puts her right over the limit.
Quartermaster| 9.9.10 @ 7:39PM
Social Workers with the state social services departments are not to be trusted at all. I'm sorry your wife is one of them, but she could have gotten honest employment (and still could). While some state's are better than others, that says little as all are dangerous to everyone because of the damage they do families, and the incentives to steal children disregarding the fact that the overwhelming majority are damaged as a result.
Some states are notorious. Florida and Georgia are two, and I have personal experience with Georgia who stole two of my grandkids, both me and from my daughter, for nothing at all. The case worker was caught in perjury, and all she got was fired. FIRED for perjury! She should have been locked away for years. Georgia has killed 200 kids in DFACS custody and all that has happened was the case workers were fired. FIRED for murder. MURDER!
Get real Mr. Orlet. Some professions are hated because they have earned the the enmity of the people. Lawyers have earned it because they are corrupt and hypocritical. Claiming to police society, they refuse (not fail, as you can try and fail) to police themselves. It is no wonder teh courts and legislatures are corrupt as they are dominated by Lawyers.
Police earn it by being soem of the biggest scofflaws in our society. Yet they claim to protect us. They are simply a group of thugs, by and large that suck our taxes and abuse us. This is particularly true of the Highway Patrol organizations. I have as yet to see a Highway Patrolman obey the speed limits they purport to uphold.
I could go on and on, as many who read AmSpec could. And government is hated for good reason, and so are those who are parasites, like Lawyers, Police and Social Workers. They got it the old fashioned way, they earned it.
jones| 9.9.10 @ 9:51PM
Relax. It's not like you're a politician.
Rich Rostrom| 9.10.10 @ 12:13AM
Street parking is limited, and has to be turned over.
If there are no meters, people leave their cars parked indefinitely, and there are no spaces available for people who want to shop.
This is especially true in mixed-use areas where there are lots of residences or office buildings.
Duncan| 9.10.10 @ 10:47AM
Is it an accident that the parkingmeter was invented by the same man who invented the Yo-yo?
GENE HAUBER| 9.10.10 @ 10:52AM
Being hated can certainly be a badge of honor and a mighty proud one to boot, as long as you are hated by the crown that put obammymammy in office...................YEAHHHH!!!
EN| 9.10.10 @ 9:42PM
I'm a mechanic, and I can tell people are uncomfortable. However, that is usually because they don't understand a thing about how their cars work, that they are machines with parts that wear out, and that magical thinking won't fix engines. I've gotten to where I gently explain in the most kindergarten sort of ways how each system does what, but it's still an uphill battle when you hear things like "I didn't have time to bring it in when the oil light came on". We refer to those in the trade as "idiot lights", because even an idiot would be aware of a problem that needed service...unfortunately, the way people go into denial about car issues borders on the insane. Also, lying to your mechanic about routine repairs does NOT earn you merit points! We aren't your priest or doctor or grandmother; we only ask those things to help us deduce what could be the matter, and usually all this does is eat up more of our time as we sleuth out what you did anyway :-)
I would say we're more like the dentist: you fear us because you don't come regularly nor do most drivers maintain the cars properly. But neither the mechanic nor the dentist is to be feared once you understand what's involved and how to care for it.
Mel Torme| 9.11.10 @ 8:38PM
Don't be so harsh on the lawyers, people! You know, it's just the 99% of the lawyers that give the other 1 % a bad name.
As for the reporters, they are not hated. They are just starting to realize that most people think they are stupid. The main reason for that, is that reporters are, indeed, pretty stupid. It hurts, I know (2nd hand, of course). As for our esteemed writers of the American Spectator, I'll give 80% of them a waiver on this, pending further review. As for Andrew Cline, WAIVER DENIED WITH PREJUDICE".
Gerald Stephens| 9.12.10 @ 10:24AM
Of course reporters lie, especially left winger nuts but the worst that can happen is the loss of time reading their crap and the few bucks spent obtaining it.
Now the case for lawyers is different. They are really dangerous. Twisting a story is one thing and suborning perjury, stealing and misappropriating client's money, and falsifying their golf scores is quite another.
I once had an attorney 'friend' who could not resist shaving a minimum of one stroke every hole WITH a STRAIGHT FACE! On one occasion when reviewing our scores for what amounted to who was going to pay for brunch, I suggested, "Pat, with a few golf lessons you would really be good." Oh, he also ran sort of a pyramid scheme with insurance settlements.
Adult toys| 7.4.11 @ 3:38AM
To me, it's the least important thing in the world to be "politically correct".l like the space.support.
thank you.