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The Nation's Pulse
Active Adult Communities and the ‘Grace of Chaos’
Groomed and tranquil landscapes that are a blight on our nation.
On August 10, Colin Mason of the Population Research Institute wrote the essay “Are Children the Enemy of Productivity?” He quoted Frank Cottrell Boyce’s article in the Guardian:
There’s a belief that to do great work you need tranquility and control, that the pram is cluttering up the hallway; life needs to be neat and tidy. This isn’t the case. Tranquility and control provide the best conditions for completing the work you imagined. But surely the real trick is to produce the work that you never imagined. The great creative moments in our history are almost all stories of distraction and daydreaming — Archimedes in the bath, Einstein dreaming of riding a sunbeam — of alert minds open to the grace of chaos.
Mason agrees with Boyce that children do not distract us from productivity, but he added that he believes they actually enhance our productivity and enhance our lives generally. Children, he writes, “remind us that the greatest insights in the world were discovered not while ponderously meditating, but while delighting in the simple pleasures and pains of life.”
Boyce’s and Mason’s words reminded me of when I was 42. My wife and I and our daughters, ages 16 to 5, moved to a suburb outside Milwaukee. Our next-door neighbors were a retired veterinarian, Dr. Frank Gentile, and his wife, Irene, both about 80. As it turned out, they knew my sister and her family who lived in the next suburb.
We moved away a few years later. And Frank and Irene moved into an assisted living home and passed on.
But my family does not forget them. I have memories of snowblowing their driveway and sidewalk and watching election returns with them. My daughters recall with great fondness their invitations to eat cookies with them after school in their kitchen. One of my daughters and I and Frank sang in the same church choir.
During these same years, we became family to my sister’s widowed father-in-law, Jack Schlosser, who was in his 80s and lived nearby. He came to many events of both my sister’s family and my family. And one of his grandchildren lived behind us.
In this past year, I’ve known a couple of people who have moved into active adult communities. Active adult communities are planned, often gated, residential areas for people ages 55 and up, without children under the age of 18. Our three elderly friends outside Milwaukee could have moved to one of them. If they had, all three of our generations (elderly, middle-aged and children) would have been deprived of fruitful, loving relationships.
The number of active adult communities continues to grow in our country. Why?
Residents are repelled by certain aspects of urban or suburban life: the noises of children and of teenagers, crime, and high property taxes that supported schools. And they are attracted by amenities — bike and walking paths, golf courses, clubhouses, swimming pools, tennis courts, a full plate of indoor recreational activities. While these same amenities are typically available in urban and suburban communities, active adult communities provide them together and close at hand.
I submit that active adult communities are inimical to a rich human life. While still active, while still mobile, while still employed, the residents have purposefully disengaged from their elders, from teenagers, from children — except on the specific dates and time and places they select. On the spectrum of what should be regarded as examples of faith-based land use planning and what should not, active adult communities fall on the extreme of “not.”
When I was in college, I would return home of course. In church, it would feel quite odd to be among young children, teenagers, middle-aged people and the elderly. At first I was happy to return to campus and be with my same-age peers. Later, it was the campus rather than the church that seemed odd. I started calling college campuses “youth reservations.” But at least college campuses have redeeming value. They are devoted to the development of the intellect and the transmission of knowledge. They are populated by people intending to remain no more than four years and then go out and change the world. Residents of active adult communities, on the other hand, could remain 20-plus years, and to what good purpose are they devoted?
There may be value in being a “gun-free” or “tobacco-free” or “drug-free” zone, but where is the value in having grown-ups post “child-free” signs? Where is the value in having them post signs declaring “under-age-55-free zones”?
I submit that the groomed and tranquil landscapes of active adult communities are a blight on our larger communities and our nation.
In utter contrast to this blight is the recent development of one-room portable modules that house elderly persons. They will be placed temporarily on the lot of a caregiver’s permanent home. The Commonwealth of Virginia recently passed legislation allowing such siting to supersede local zoning laws. The juxtaposition of permanent and temporary housing structures may not be aesthetically pleasing but, in similar fashion, school districts around the country have sited temporary classrooms next to school buildings for the sake our schoolchildren. Hopefully, these modules for the care of our frail elderly will blossom across the landscape. Virginians have welcomed “the grace of chaos.”
Letter to the Editor View all comments (33) | Leave a comment
More Articles by James M. Thunder
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Richard Baker| 8.24.10 @ 7:27AM
Here in Florida I have always referred to these 55 and above communities as the place where people go to die. My wife had an aunt who lived in one and we stayed with her once for a week. I couldn't believe how often I saw the fire and rescue folks and the coroner come in to the project, day and night. Sterile and devoid of life they are.
Gerontus| 8.24.10 @ 8:18AM
Adult communities vary. In Ct. Heritage Village has a large community of active people who do the leisure bit but also enrich the outside community and local churches. They don't have to be sterile eldegardens
JP| 8.24.10 @ 8:56AM
When I was in the service 30 years ago I went home on leave with a buddy from Chicago. He came from an old ethnic neighborhood on the city's northwest side. His father was Lithuanian and his mother German. They lived in a 6 story old brownstone apartment building. The large extended family owned the entire building. The youngest adults and thier families lived on the top floors, while eldest lived on the ground floors. Most of the adult males worked in the trades. This building as well as most on that street were full of noise, commotion, and activity. That apartment building saw more life and death in a year (as well as everything in between) than most people see in a lifetime. During the week I stayed with them I was the odd man out. My German was only passable, and of course I spoke no Baltic languages. But I can still remember how much life that large family enjoyed. There was no "older" vs "younger" generation. The younger families paid the taxes, did repairs, and made sure the old boiler worked in the winter. The grand parents did the babysitting, cooked, and always had some kind of evening rosariy and vespers going. The young children seemed to migrate from one apartment to another. Cousins, aunts, uncles, and grand parents constantly visited eachother.
It was a kind of life that provides great comfort no matter what the social, economic, and political chaos that always plagues Chitown. That family fit to a T what Burke called a nation's little platoons.
Anthony| 8.24.10 @ 2:11PM
JP, You bring back happy memories. I grew up in the Bronx in a 6 story tenement. My maternal G.Ps were on the 6th floor, two of my mothers brothers & families on the 3rd and 5th. We were on the 2nd. It's as you described, running from one apt to the next, with chores shared and Sunday dinner, a 5 hour feast of Italian delights, I 'd give $10,000 to relive for a single day.
Sadly, some 25 years later, when visiting my parents at a very charming Florida retirement community, while at dinner, the food was so disgusting, I almost cried. I could not bring myself to ask my parents how they could eat this crap, nor suggest we go upstairs and make some pasta. I think they sensed my sadness.
Well, I don't anticipate this for me, I'm hoping to die at home, peacefully, sans a diaper.
John DuBose| 8.24.10 @ 9:26AM
This one is easy. It is a personal choice. Dear NANNY.. But out.
DG in GA| 8.24.10 @ 10:32PM
John, I SO agree with you! Butt Out urban planning nannies. One of the things I love about America is that we have choices. One of the choices is where and how we want to live. Frankly, after living in a neighborhood of families with children, we chose to move to an "Active Adult" community. Why? Because we got tired of having the neighbors' kids paintballing in the neighborhood, spraying paint on peoples' homes and cars without apology. We got tired of the skateboarding and bikes all over the place, and the basketball hoops set up in every cul-de-sac. And God forbid you should ask the kids to MOVE, or STOP or take responsibility for damage they cause. There were parents in our neighborhood who threatened to SUE people for complaining about THEIR delinquent kids!
Hey! We RAISED our kids. They are responsible, productive adults. They have nice children too. They can visit us whenever they want. But we don't want to deal with YOUR kids, thank you very much!
And for those who criticize that these communities are just "God's Waiting Room," maybe they're right. But in the meantime, we're playing golf, dancing, swimming, playing bridge and enjoying the company of other adults. You say we don't have people to look out for us? What do you think our neighbors do? There is always someone to help out when a neighbor has surgery, or needs a life to the store, or needs help around the house. Don't criticize our lifestyle if you haven't tried it!
Anastasia Mather| 8.24.10 @ 9:37AM
I so totally agree. Instead of the joyful chaos of family, one gets the sterile, selfish, almost demonic "neatness" of people who never look beyond themselves or their own comfort.
I knew one pastor who actually thought it was sinful to completely retire. Maybe change what one did for others when one left the workplace, but never retired.
No wonder so many children are adrift.
dennis2j| 8.24.10 @ 9:46AM
My wife and I--empty nesters for lo, these many years, have sometimes been tempted to seek shelter in an active adult community ourselves. In principle, living among families with children of all ages is ideal. Sadly, the reality is that many children and teenagers are being so poorly raised that they--and frequently even their parents--have little or no regard for the different needs of the older folks among them. Tranquility and a sense of security become more important as one ages. We currently live in an apartment building with some much older individuals as well as a young couple and their 2-year old. We have become a tight-knit community within the complex. But if some of the other "families" in the complex were to move into our building, we'd start looking for sanctuary elsewhere.
Louis Jenkins| 8.24.10 @ 10:04AM
As one enters the over 55 years he ponders what life has left for him. It is great that some people choose to move to retirement homes where they can wile away the hours until death. Others may decide on a grab life by the horns existence. I personally believe you should marry young and often. At least you'll have prodgeny and not be totally alone. The youngesters make life worth living.
ColoradoWest| 8.24.10 @ 10:13AM
I'll take a "sterile" adult community anytime..."sterile" of children.
If I could convince my sig other to move to one of these communities now, I would...but they wouldn't let me in yet at 51.
I look forward to going "somewhere to die"...w/ lower property taxes and in peace away from bratty kids. Del Webb suits me just fine.
Solipslip| 8.24.10 @ 5:03PM
Come on down to here Venice, FL.
It's God's waiting room; new vacancies daily.
You can join the other "blue-hairs" who create instant "drive-throughs" out of our offices and corner jiffy-rips.
Petronius| 8.24.10 @ 10:14AM
The damned lefties controlling my life style has me loading cartridges in the evenings. We don't need anybody from our own side interfering in our affairs.
There are only 3 behaviors that require elimination, predation, perversion, and parasitism, because we pay for all the damage they cause. Those resort style developments cost more than I will ever see and wouldn't go near if I could afford them. This kind of social engineering is uncalled for and what the geritol set does is none of anybody's business.
stmichrick| 8.24.10 @ 10:32AM
Whenever I visited the over-55 communities that my parents and other relatives inhabited, I could not stop yawning the entire time I was there.
They lived long lives, but I'm not sure they were living.
Mimi| 8.24.10 @ 10:50AM
I visited my mother in one of those places in Florida....Rode around and in front of every home was a sign...Harry and Gracie, Dan and Emma, Stu& Nell on and on. I called the place " ABOVE GROUND CEMETARIES" with their plaques!!
ncatty| 8.24.10 @ 10:59AM
"...one room portable modules that house elderly persons." If you make them coffin size you can just put them underground at the appropriate time.
Skateboards and eggs| 8.24.10 @ 11:09AM
I'm having to have the concrete steps in front of my house repaired because the kids across the street have launched their skateboards off of them to the point that the concrete has crumbled. Repeatedly asking them not to do it hasn't worked, and their parents are nowhere to be found most of the time.
At my last address, my family and I were very nice to the larger family next door, giving them furniture, a typewriter and other things, as well as being good neighbors in other ways. In return, our cars were occasionally egged, and one of the boys put a wad of human feces in our mailbox. Time and again, we had to call the police when the older sons in their family went on rampages -- setting fires in their yard, harrassing other neighbors, etc.
When I was growing up, such kids would have been straightened out in a hurry. Adults-only housing looks better to me all the time.
Margie| 8.24.10 @ 11:37AM
Reading this brought tears to my eyes. This past weekend we had to say goodbye to my elderly parents because we must move out of state. They are close to 80 and still maintain the same house they've owned since I was a child. It started out as a tiny cape cod and became over the years one of the most beautiful houses around, with a breezeway, garage, and a built in pool to boot. All the work of my hardworking Dad, who still works to this day as a part time police Captain.
They were talking about how they can no longer afford the over 7,000.00 a year property taxes and that something had to give and mentioned one of these over 55 places. You know how the elderly don't want to "burden" us. I told them they can come with us but my 2 brothers and their families live close by with their grandchildren and they don't want to leave just yet.
If the stupid democrats weren't into punishing us with high property and other taxes, our parents wouldn't have to give up their homes. Anyhow, the house where we're moving has a little plot of land and perhaps if we invite them to come live in a little house on our land they would like that better.
Vinny| 8.24.10 @ 12:14PM
Lets see my wife and I sacrificed everything to raise our daughter. My wife was home most of the time so she would have a parent to come home to and not a baby sitter. We gave up vacations and traveled sparingly mainly within New England.
We paid for her college education and her beautiful wedding. Should I feel badly about thinking that it's our turn now? I don't think so.
Those who think that 55+ communities are this supposed death camp, I hate to break it to you but the grim reaper comes no matter where you live. Look at Chatham Farms in CT. I'm considering it have I earned it absolutely. Should I feel like a criminal that I retired? absolutely not 4 hours of commuting for 35 years earned me the right. Should I hang my head in shame, absolutely not. Is it our time? yes it is. That community is a big 40 min from where I live but offers so much more than I currently have.
NET NET: Don't judge people who choose something that works for them. Someday you may all have to make that decision. It works for some others no. I haven't made the decision yet but I am seriously considering it, and contrary to what most of you say, It's our decision no one else's.
Radioman777| 8.24.10 @ 12:48PM
Places for people afraid of life.
Patrick Greene | 8.24.10 @ 1:24PM
Just turned 55 a few months ago. The older I get the more I realize that life is about family. I regret not having more children, I regret my time spent at work, I don't regret a minute I spent with my children. I am enjoying 4 grandchildren now, and have a son who just entered West Point, I hope he will provide some children while I can still enjoy them.
Ed| 8.24.10 @ 1:24PM
I live in a exurban condo complex in Ohio, but it isn't gated and it has no age restrictions. It has an almost zero crime rate except for a few family disputes that get out of hand. Nevertheless, most residents are over 50. It's the enforced age restrictions that poison the places described in this article.
However, elderly people feel very insecure if the local crime rate is high. What feels manageable at age 35 is intolerable at age 65 or 75.
LaneyB| 8.24.10 @ 2:46PM
My parents moved into a Continuing Care Residential Community in 2002. My father died in 2007, I suspect, from boredom. By living in a building of 300 residents they gave up providing even simple daily food preparation, arranging their own comings and goings and spent endless hours with others who knew this was their final stop on the way to die.
My mother, now widowed, has done nothing for the last three years but complain she is bored. She has nothing to do, and the activities planned for the residents are few and far between with most consisting of Bingo and movies from long ago. Arranging for transportation is a hassle and expensive. The meals in the dining room are inedible and made with the enthusiasm of an army cook.
The fee to "purchase" an apartment was two hundred grand. The monthly maintenance fee is over $5000. They could have stayed in their home, received care when needed and hired car service for far less than the bleeding of their resources has cost living in this walled-off crypt.
They interacted/interact with no one who wasn't/isn't also ancient and waiting to leave this earth. I see no advantage to one's health or mental life by vacating the real world of chance encounters, communication with all ages on a regular basis who aren't either medical personnel or hired staff whose job is to direct traffic, or taking care of the rhythm of one's own life.
Jeff Krasney| 8.24.10 @ 3:35PM
I recently moved into a 55+ community in Florida. I am amazed at the large number of single women in my community who will do just about anything to keep the attention of an appropriate aged man. I am quickly making up for a lifetime of monogamy, and my teen-aged self would be so jealous.
PJ| 8.24.10 @ 9:42PM
Be careful by using protection! STD rates have gone up in your age group.
Mel Torme| 8.24.10 @ 4:42PM
"There may be value in being a "gun-free" or "tobacco-free" or "drug-free" zone ...."
Yeah, if you consider medical costs, I guess we're on the same page here: Since a burglar would feel very free to rummage through your tidy house, and you, being in a gun-free zone (well, almost!) have been shot in the belly for trying to interfere with no defense, I think some medical costs would be saved indeed. No emergency care is necessary for the burglar, as he's good to go and none for our formerly-active-adult homeowner, who can go straight to the freakin' morgue withou passing go or collecting $200.
Nice work, James. Preach your anti-gun crap somewhere else. We don't take too kindly to your type around here. By "we", I mean me.
Jim| 8.25.10 @ 6:44PM
I was referring to the "cute" little signs around schools.
Mel Torme| 8.26.10 @ 2:32PM
From reading your article, I thought that the subject was "active adult communities" and your objections to them (much of which I agree with).
I re-read your sentence now and see that you are comparing "gun-free zone" signs and others in one place to "child-free signs" in said active adult communities? The "gun-free zone" signs are definitely not cute to me (and, yes, I see your quote marks). 20 dead teenagers (or however many) lying in their own blood due to lack of any serious self-defense effort in that "anti-gun zone" in Littleton, CO was not cute, nor did it add value to anyone or any dead body.
So, what's your point about the signs adding value? If I were a burglar or child-molester I would see the value in those signs, of course, but, alas, I'm not, Jim. So who's your audience, the active-burglar community?
Mel Torme| 8.26.10 @ 2:35PM
Oh, wait, I've got it now. You're used to some of your audience being your left-wing friends to which you are trying to get across some conservative point, perhaps? You want to give on your principles on a few points to ingratiate yourself with them.
That doesn't work with me, so STFU about your value-added "gun-free zone" signs next time, mmmkay?
jrjr| 8.24.10 @ 5:04PM
55+ community -- with a weekly 55 page newspaper publication of the activities in the community. 25+ short golf courses and 9 major courses having 18/27 holes. Just about any indoor or outdoor activity anyone could think about, and if a person wants to start something new, the "company" has advisors and assistants to help. Most people seem to be of the higher average income person who saved correctly and seeks to live it according to the rules they prefer. Thus, I insist that it is a personal preference. I have lived in this for 11 years after 2 retirements and think it of something that separates us from much of reality. We neighbors are but 10 - 15 feet away from each other in 2-4 bedrooms, 1-3 baths in very nice homes. Would I do it again -- absolutely not. Jeff, your advertising is in neon lights on your sleeve.
Thomas| 8.24.10 @ 6:11PM
One size does not fit all...that goes for retirees as well as the rest of us...my parents have two small
55 + places....one in the Northeast...the other in FL....they are thriving......watching them trying to cut grass, rake leaves, shovel snow & clean the "American Dream" home w/ garage and lot...just got to be too much to manage.
They still do all those things....well no snow...lol....but at a fraction of what it used to be like......sometimes less is more....
Jeamaar37| 8.25.10 @ 12:28AM
It's is always surprising to me how vitriolic and nasty many of the comments are about other people's opinions and life choices. One would think that readers/writers would be either more reasonable--or more compassionate.
Bruce| 8.25.10 @ 2:51PM
I live in a 55+ apt complex next door to a high school. If I want noise, I walk half a block. If I want sleep which is one of the best amenities I can imagine, I stay home. And my windows are left open all the time. If I lived down the street, they wouldn't be and I wouldn't enjoy the sounds of life outside.
Bob Miller| 8.25.10 @ 4:04PM
People still have the right to choose their surroundings.