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Ben Stein's Diary

Plugging Away

A reminder of the summer just past. From our September issue.

(Page 2 of 2)

Wednesday

IT IS SMOKY UP HERE IN IDAHO TODAY. There is apparently a huge forest fire near Kelowna in British Columbia, not far from here, and smoke is blowing our way. ("Blow some of that my way," as an old cigarette ad used to say.) But it's also hot and dry so I will go out on the boat soon. My wife is ill again so I'll just go out with my pal Tim.

As I sit here in my bedroom of my condo at the fabulous Seasons resort, the ultimate resort, I am sort of staggered at how many things I have plugged in. Computer. Great HP printer. Two phones. Many, many, many cell phone chargers. Five lamps. My beloved XM radio, one of the great inventions of mankind; a TV; a DVD; a stereo, in fact, three different stereos. I like it. I like music. I like being connected.

Plus, I have many battery-operated things… flashlights, Discman, iPod. Earphones with batteries. What a great world. Thank you for electricity, dear God. Please do not allow Nancy Pelosi to take away my electricity just so she can satisfy her insane wish to control.

But I am writing this in tears because I am so grateful for the e-mails I just got from my pals Wlady Pleszczynski and Bob Tyrrell. I have been a bit mistreated by some other people lately, and Bob and Wlady, as usual, have rushed to the support of their pal, moi. My sister has also been incredibly helpful, as have Barron and Phil. I am really blessed to have such good friends and sister. My longtime pal Victoria Sackett used to say that "friends are the family we choose for ourselves." I am incredibly blessed in both family and friends.

Meanwhile, I am thinking about Mr. Obama. Wow, he really is a control freak. Not as bad as Mrs. Pelosi but bad. My theory is that he has "control" just stamped into his brain because he has felt compelled to undergo such self-control all his life to get over his childhood losses. So, he has to control everyone else around him and in the nation: control health care, control cars, control energy use, control what kind of heat and cooling we have in our homes, control everything that can be controlled. Za Stalina! The real goal is not to save oil (it was a hoax that we were even low on energy), not to save on medical costs (an impossibility considering how many goniff doctors there are), not to save the environment (which is another hoax issue). The real goal is to control human beings and at that, Mr. Obama is doing well, or, I should say, catastrophically badly for human freedom.

Never mind. I think I will go out on my boat while I am still allowed to do so, still allowed to burn gasoline and ruin Gore's Green Earth.

So, now it's evening and I am resting after a long trip to Bottle Bay and then to Beyond Hope, two great cafes on the lake. I love my boat but everyone tells me I have to get a new, bigger, better boat. I always wanted a Chris-Craft, but they are a bit expensive for me. Maybe a Cobalt. Well, anyway, good problem to have.

How long will I have problems like what kind of boat to get? How long until it's much more serious matters like health issues? Well, I have been morbid most of my life. I'll skip it tonight. I'll have my leftover spaghetti from Ivano's and pizza from the Loading Dock, and go to sleep in my bed with the waves of the lake lapping below me, and the spectacularly powerful sound of the freight trains lulling me to sleep. I wish I had my dogs here with me but I will see them soon, if all's well.

How I wish I could live like this forever.

Page:   12

About the Author

Ben Stein is a writer, actor, economist, and lawyer living in Beverly Hills and Malibu. He writes "Ben Stein's Diary" for every issue of The American Spectator.

Letter to the Editor View all comments (41) | Leave a comment

CaelR| 9.12.09 @ 6:31AM

Good thing that you’ve been enjoying your life Ben. As mush as I want the lifestyle you are enjoying I’m afraid all I can do is work and make an income for my family needs. But I’m so delightful that you’ve shared us your experience and it made me wonder when can my family and I enjoy such wonderful trip. Anyway in relation to your article title “Plugging Away”, there is this such ban that is started in Europe and now the US and Canada will follow it – it is light bulb bans. Silly but true! However, there may be something to it. Right now, the EU is instituting light bulb bans, wherein incandescent bulbs are now forbidden, and people can only buy fluorescent bulbs, or CFL bulbs, or LED light bulbs. CFL bulbs put out the same light with 80% less energy, but are trickier to dispose of (they contain mercury) and are more expensive to manufacture. Your average CFL bulb goes for about $15, and the average LED bulb is about $100. Just imagining the expenses makes me think of additional income just to provide a good lighting source in our house. What a life!

jeannie Hoyle| 9.25.09 @ 10:32AM

I cleaned your condo through sandpoint vacation rentals for a company called absolute cleanning ...and I remember brad telling michelle that you commented that all her girls muct be on crack ...that made me laugh but yes absolute cleanning is a low budget cleanning company whos girls dont get paid enough to even clean an out house... I QUIT!!! last week because of all of the games and drama ...if i were you i would hire a different cleanning company , because absolute cleanning is falling apart ...their employees are like monkeys working for $9 an hour while breaking their back along the way ...it is sad . but anyways nice condo and i enjoyed cleanning it for you ...not for the company...welcome to sandpoint , it truley is a beautiful retreat.

Robert| 9.12.09 @ 6:48AM

Thank you Mr Stein very entertaining piece and funny too. This not a rhetorical question. Is there any part of our lives that the government already does not have a controlling law or regulation. I live in a semi rural part of Florida and everywhere you look the government is there. I like the idea of feeling safe protected by the county sheriffs and fire department. This is what goverments should be doing. I too have a boat and enjoy going out one or two days a week. The only drawback is that the federal government has a rule that dogs are not allowed in National Forests and the lakes within. We have two Cairn Terriers that are also part of our family. It would be great to take them boating with us. But alas we all know that according to the government they would destoy the 100,000 acre National Forest in one day. Your article was great but it reminded me that some politician somewhere has taken every common sense issue and made a law regulating that activity. Today I just want to goverment "Leave us alone"

Michael L. Hauschild| 9.12.09 @ 9:07AM

Mr. Stein,
What you should have brought home with you is a little more of the South African (and Hindu) penchant for inevitability. "Chicken Soup" is a common adjective for "season." You will smile, you will eat noodles, you and "Big Wifey" will recover.

TennesseeVolunteer| 9.12.09 @ 10:55AM

Ben, you are a cool breeze on a hot day!
It's 9-12, what will we do today to make a difference?

Tim| 9.23.09 @ 4:10PM

"But there is a deeper fallacy besides this obvious fact; that men need not live for food merely because they cannot live without food. The truth is that the thing most present to the mind of man is not the economic machinery necessary to his existence; but rather that existence itself; the world which he sees when he wakes every morning and the nature of his general position in it. There is something that is nearer to him than livelihood, and that is life. For once that he remembers exactly what work produces his wages and exactly what wages produce his meals, he reflects ten times that it is a fine day or it is a queer world, or wonders whether life is worth living, or wonders whether marriage is a failure, or is pleased and puzzled with his own children, or remembers his own youth, or in any such fashion vaguely reviews the mysterious lot of man. "

Mr. Stein, a wealthy man, embodies what Chesterton wrote about.

http://www.worldinvisible.com/.....art1c7.htm

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Beverly Hills Homes for Sale Beverly Hills Real Estate - The American Spectator : Plu links to this page. Here’s an excerpt:

…FREEDOM, no Storm Troopers running after me shouting “Jude, Raus!” Idaho, Malibu, Beverly Hills, D.C., FREEDOM. What can I ever do to thank God enough? … See the original post: The American Spectator : Plugging Away Share and Enjoy: Related Posts Major business events scheduled for Thursday (San Diego Union-Tribune) Major business events and economic events scheduled for Thursday: Originally posted here:…

SEagan| 9.23.09 @ 9:36PM

gores green earth...lol. enjoy the life the Lord has blessed you with Mr.Stein.

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Twitter Trackbacks for The American Spectator : Plugging Away [spectator.org] on Top links to this page. Here’s an excerpt:

…Cyst Treatment, Ovarian Cyst, Ovarian Cysts, Ovarian Cyst Relief, Shortened Links Linking to the spectator.org page http://bit.ly/810lE info http://bit.ly/191Pia info   2 tweets Tweet The American Spectator : Plugging Away spectator.org/archives/2009/09/23/plugging-away – view page – cached IT'S SUMMER. Wifey and I are up at Lake Pend Oreille in Sandpoint, Idaho, Bonner County. We are in our condo and…

Margie| 9.24.09 @ 12:26PM

Dear Ben,
I believe the bugs you refer to that are biting you at night are bed bugs. They are rampant these days especially in hotels and the like. Do a Google search. They only come out to bite at night. They will jump into your suitcases and come home with you, where you won't be able to be rid of them. Sorry to be saying this if you already know it, but I just had to warn you in case you didn't know. ("Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, When it is in your power to do it." Prov. 3:27).
My best wishes and prayers for you and your Wife,
Margie

Dan Young| 9.24.09 @ 7:01PM

Hi Ben ... I'll bring you chicken soup, an autographed Marty Becker book, and an SHS Bulldog Sweatshirt if you'll do some PSA's for the Idaho Meth Project with me sometime between now and January...Bashful Dan :)

Bill| 10.5.09 @ 1:56AM

Ben,

We love you so much! Your column is like a letter from an old friend and brings a smile.
What, no pictures?

Dittos on Pelosi/ Obama. He never fooled me either. Regime change needed. I saw Nicaragua devolve back to an oppressive socialism under Ortega the last 3 years and I'm having the same creepy feeling here now. The behavior and tone is the same, unmistakable.

I'm from Oregon originally, now North Carolina. Idaho is beautiful. You are blessed, please stay that way because we need all the Ben Steins we can get.

Going John Galt

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