Alice in Wonderland is politically hot, according to a former Bush-Cheney speechwriter.
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“In that case,” I shrugged, “I suppose I’ll have to edit it out of tomorrow’s nightmare. But may I continue, Dr. Freudenthal?”
“At this point,” I recalled, “a very serious-looking man, wearing a white wig and a black robe, who looked just like Attorney-General Holder, began to shout, ‘Off with his head! Off with his head!’ and then another fellow, who reminded me of David Axelrod and who had a giant sword slung over his back, grabbed me by my wrists and dragged me into a large, empty field. I could see that my time is up, and I prepared to surrender my soul to my Maker, but suddenly Axelrod dropped his sword and started running away.’It’s the Jabberwock,’ he screamed, ‘it’s the Jabberwock.’ And sure enough, the Jabberwock, with eyes of flame, came whiffling through the tulgey wood, and burbled as it came!”
“So what did you do next?” asked Dr. Freudenthal, who was so caught up in my nightmare that he stopped taking notes.
“Well, I quickly picked up Axelrod’s sword and charged at the furious Jabberwock, and one two, one to! The vorpal blade went snicker-snack! And I left the Jabberwock dead.”
“But that’s just wonderful!” cried Dr. Freudenthal. “Why are you so depressed — you should be proud of yourself.”
“I’m afraid, doctor, that you just don’t understand,” I patiently explained. “I just wiped out an endangered species. I could get twenty years for that!”
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