- Home
- About Us
- Contributors
- Departments
- Topics
- Back Issues
- Weekly Archives
- AmSpecBlog
- Subscribe
- Newsletter
- Advertise
- Donate
- Contact Us
- Daily Digest
- Templeton Essays
Among the Intellectualoids
Prometheus Bound
From the trans fat Nazis in the Northeast to those on duty keeping school bake-sales safe for humanity out West; from banning plastic shopping bags -- which were foisted on us by greenies to begin with -- to fines for "light pollution," one can't help but think that our once-free country is in the final stages of nannydom and well on its way toward total government control of our lives.
Many folks calmly accepted the banishment of smokers and nodded in submissive agreement that our public schools should control the sexual, moral and nutritional upbringing of our children, and most seem to think that the plethora of laws regulating an ever-growing list of our daily activities are relatively unobtrusive. After all, they mostly apply to public places and have no bearing on our actual home lives, right?
Well now, we have the fireplace police out in force in California's Bay Area, sniffing out illicit smoke. Under a law passed in July, on so-called Spare the Air days this winter, it will be illegal for 1.4 million residents to burn wood in the fireplaces on their own private property. And they will enforce it with all the gusto that liberal busybodies can muster. According to the San Francisco Chronicle, "The fireplace police say they are determined to keep law and order in the living room."
Color me confused, but does the liberal mantra that the government is to stay out of their bedrooms not apply to the rest of the house? Nevertheless, no matter what room you use to try to hide out from government intrusion, you'd best be sure to do it with the lights off, unless the bulbs therein meet with the approval of you-know-who.
What can be the reason for denying citizens the warmth of a winter fire that would save them lots of money during these hard times? Says a district spokeswoman: "This is a major health threat. The weather conditions are such that smoke is trapped closer to the ground and anyone with respiratory problems will have a hard time breathing." So once again, the tyranny of the minority shall rule the land in the form of a few unfortunates who have breathing woes.
So, anyone who is against the ban and would suggest that those poor souls merely stay indoors during high pollutant periods must be an insensitive lout, yes? But what about the ghastly pollutants that occur in the summer time? What does our nanny recommend then? "People who are especially sensitive to pollution are advised to limit their time outdoors, particularly in the afternoon hours."
The bureaucrats in charge of enforcement of this heinous dictate
also helpfully provide a toll-free number (1-877-4NO-BURN) so you
can snitch on your inconsiderate and Earth-hating neighbors. This
little trick was a favorite of fascists and Communists for
decades, so no one should be surprised that dropping a dime on
your fellow Americans is considered by liberals to be a
civic-minded duty. Indeed, pediatricians around the country are
already inducing children to inform on their
parents' habits; nothing like giving the little tykes a lesson in
citizenship.
Now, some in California might choose to employ their little gray
cells and ask why officials -- bowing to extreme environmentalist
groups -- refuse to allow routine maintenance of heavily
wooded areas to prevent huge and devastating forest fires which
throw more "pollution" into the air than fireplaces ever could,
but then they might risk being sent to "smoke
education class."
So far I've never been to one of these re-education camps, but I would imagine the teaching goes something like this: many of the practices of humans dating back thousands of years have now been found to be harmful; like burning wood for warmth and cooking, parental control of child-rearing, and the right to eat whatever one darn well pleases. Conversely, many of the practices banned by human beings for thousands of years have now been found to be beneficial to society; like abortion, gay marriage and pornography on demand.
And it's not going to get better any time soon. Our recent elections have led to a perfect storm for big government control freaks: our nation's capital in the hands of liberal Democrats. But some of our time-honored, constitutionally guaranteed rights may still remain: it's unclear if it's legal to burn the American flag on Spare the Air nights, so use caution.
Comments
Leave a Comment
Are you in a mob?
The Democrats say Obamacare opponents are a mob. Are they right?
Participating in this survey will subscribe you to the American Spectator email newsletter. You may unsubscribe at any time.
Crusader| 12.3.08 @ 8:43AM
You forgot to add in there burning Sarah Palin and GWB in effigy on "Spare the Air" nights is OK too!
I have an idea. How about a "Spare us the Government" day, or week, or month, or year? How about that? How about a number to call when a gubmint O-fishul violates his oath of office so we can round up a posse and string him up? How about that?
John M| 12.3.08 @ 9:27AM
I find it ironic when visiting China that even though China is generally thought to be a less free communist country, in many respects there are fewer rules and regulations for controlling individual behavior than there are in the USA where we are supposedly more free. With our legions of lawyers running the government and the ever increasing environmental and health regulations, we are much further along the socialist welfare nanny state route than China. We may not have gone as far as some other countries, but we seem intent on closing the gap between us and the even more highly regulated European countries like Britain. Once we have things like socialized healthcare, gun confiscation, and surveillance cameras on every street corner we will know we have caught up, although by then the Brits may have RFID microchips implanted in the arms so their every move can be tracked, all for the good of society of course. The problem is that once a society starts going down the nanny state path there is no where to draw a line in the sand to say enough is enough. Without this limitation, the path will ulitimately lead to total control and total loss of individual freedom.
Alan Brooks| 12.3.08 @ 9:29AM
de-control of parental child rearing is the worst.
Hush this cry of progress 'til a thousand years have past!
Vern Crisler| 12.3.08 @ 9:33AM
Speaking of statist regimentation, the State of Arizona has now banned Christmas lights from all public buildings, ostensibly to save on energy. That's the way all these bullying directives are justified -- it's for your own good.
I'm sure if it was a Muslim holiday, the State of Arizona would be falling all over itself to accomodate the celebrators.
Alan Brooks| 12.3.08 @ 10:49AM
Porn is about as erotic as autopsy photos.
Uncle Ernie| 12.3.08 @ 11:10AM
Personally, I like to look at my porn in front of a nice roarong wood fire. So I'm pretty torn on this one.
Stan Redmond| 12.3.08 @ 2:23PM
Nanny state liberals are the virus that is killing American greatness and productivity. The green gestapo is the cancer. CRY CRY CRY all day about "Bush shredding the constitution" yet the same crybabies have NO problem eliminated the bill of rights. Can't choose your light bulbs, can't eat what you want, can't light a fire, can't smoke, can't use efficient R-12 for airconditioning, can't kill mosquitos with DDT, can't own firearms...ALL BASED ON INVENTED SCAMS. One day, and I hope I see it soon, the GREEN bubble will pop like a bunch of bad mortgages.
Joel| 12.3.08 @ 7:47PM
Makes you wonder how humanity even survived until these controlling bleeding hearts showed up to tell us how to live. Just wait until we are out of groceries and home to dwell in. Do you think the populas will allow them to tell us we can't have a fire to back up to. Or even better if we don't allow them at our fire. The day is a comming, revolution is in the air. Cry Babies!
Marc Jeric| 12.3.08 @ 10:01PM
Does anybody remember the time when that functional moron Carter recommended that we all use wood-burning stoves to save heating fuel? And a moribund industry of wood-burning stoves was reborn - every intellectualoid in San Francisco bought those pretty stoves.
Kevin Riley O'Keeffe| 12.4.08 @ 7:27AM
"Does anybody remember the time when that functional moron Carter recommended that we all use wood-burning stoves to save heating fuel? And a moribund industry of wood-burning stoves was reborn - every intellectualoid in San Francisco bought those pretty stoves."
Yeah, I remember. My dad was one of the Bay Area liberals who bought one of those (excellent, incredibly efficient) wood-burning stoves. The problem is with the weenies who won't allow us to use them today (its really about liberal yuppie-types being bothered by the smell of woodsmoke; the rest is just blarney). Jimmy Carter was 100 percent correct.
fishydude| 12.6.08 @ 8:46PM
Years ago, liberal "friends" who complain that conservatives want to put cameras in America's bedrooms. I responded that that may be true of a handful of people who call themselves conservative, but that the same liberals who make that complaint want5 to put cameras in every other room. And they have been doing more of it every year.
Liberals only like democracy when it gets the results they want. When it doesn't, they use regulatory fascism. What they can not own, the demand control over.
NFL jerseys| 8.29.09 @ 3:12AM
It is a wonderful article: NFL jerseys,Photoshop CS2,ghd Hair Straightener,Adobe Photoshop CS4.