The American Spectator

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The entire fracas with Clemens and McNamee on the Hill was an embarrassment for all involved: Clemens, McNamee, and the U.S. House of Representatives. And Andy Pettitte did not come out if this looking good either; he lied to the committee in his deposition and ratted out his best friend in a deposition so that he didn’t have to face any questioning.

What you had was a proven liar in McNamee and a suspected liar in Clemens being grilled by publicity-seeking members of Congress, all of whom had taken sides long before the hearings started. This was not so much a hearing as it was a star chamber, where the Democrats had decided that Clemens was a liar and McNamee was some sort of flawed hero. But there were no heroes in this sordid mess.

As for the Mike Greenberg line about Shakespeare, he was simply trying to say that this situation had many of the themes that are evident in tragedy. Especially in the close relationship that Clemens and Pettitte had, and the seeming betrayal of one friend of the other for personal gain. And he acknowledged that his reference to Iago was not a good analogy and tried to find a more apt analogy. And the friendship angle was compelling, because it puts their relationship to the test: what lengths would a friend take to protect his friends?

p>All in all, this was a mess from the beginning and should never have been taken up by the Congress. I guess it is true of some of these members that the most dangerous place in the world is between them and a camera from ESPN. br> — Eric Edwards br> Walnut Cove, North Carolina /p>

I, for one, am eternally grateful to Rep. Henry Waxman for his dogged pursuit of the use of steroids by a few professional athletes. Had he not taken the time of the Congress with this matter, it might, even now, be watering down the protections for telecom companies in the new FISA extension, or raising taxes, or otherwise imposing itself in ways which would not be of benefit to the American people. The damage that they have done to the military every time that they have turned their attention to us is just one example of the mischief that a Congress run by liberal Democrats could make if it focused on its constitutional mandates instead of these sideshows. If, as Daniel Webster said, no man’s life or property are safe while the legislature is in session, then these distractions serve a critical national interest, and they must continue.

Of course, the use of enhancements in baseball is but the tip of the iceberg. Baseball is a sport watched by millions of Americans, but Hollywood movies and television shows are watched by billions of people, and it is a rare starlet who has not had some form of medical intervention in order to enhance her performance, be it cosmetic surgery, pharmaceutical diet aids, aroma therapy or exotic colonics. Clearly, a Congress that has a mandate to investigate whether Roger Clemens was able to unnaturally extend his career with steroids has the same obligation to determine just how many times Cher has been injected with Botox, and for the same reason. I have no doubt that a serious, in-depth examination of the day-to-day changes in breast size among starlets would be the most compelling testimony since the scandals of the Clinton years, and would attract the same audience, not to mention the enthusiastic participation of many members of the Congress (Teddy Kennedy may have to be restrained). Tabloid speculation on the cosmetic surgery to the stars could be laid to rest with a few months of hearings, and the ratings bonanza could put C-SPAN into the black for decades.

p>Of course, while this is going on, serious issues facing the nation would remain unaddressed, but a bit of creative gameplay, a sort of policy version of Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon, could be used to focus attention where it is needed. For example, FISA deals exclusively with foreign intelligence gathering. Most illegal steroids are produced by overseas labs, and the trafficking in steroids requires coordination between foreign and domestic smuggling networks, and terrorists are often involved in smuggling as a means to enhance their revenues as well as moving their equipment. Therefore, it is imperative that FISA be reenacted in order to track the flow of steroids from terrorists to our elite athletes. Once the case has been made that Al Qaeda was involved in steroid abuse, it’s a simple matter to get congress to turn their br> attention to national security instead of national pastimes. br> — Mike Harris