The American Spectator

Campaign Crawlers

This past week's Democratic debate in South Carolina was a tune-up for 2008's main event: The Denver Derby, where, in August of that year, the party will choose its front-runner. Yes, the Denver Derby; the most exciting sixteen months in politics, the run for the poseurs. This contest is for thirty-five year olds and upward, foaled in the United States and ready for a step up in class.

But unlike the Kentucky Derby's Churchill Downs, the debate site was more like Chamberlain Park; with all eight runners streaking toward the appeasement of our enemies. Still, unless there are any late entries, one of this field will stand a good chance at competing for the coveted Commander-In-Chief Trophy.

Like any race, it is not always the swift who carry off the prize. Breeding, experience, stamina and training go a long way toward the making of a champion. So grab a mint julep, get ready to sing "My Old Kentucky Home" and enjoy the first jewel in the Triple Crown while yours truly handicaps the Denver Derby.

p>Name: Hillary Clinton br> Foaling State: Illinois br> Silks: Black, Pink Sash with Red, White and Blue Cap br> Trainer: Riady Racing LLC br> Odds: 3 to 1 br> Skinny: This mare was originally out of the Rodham Stables, although her name no longer reflects this. She broke her maiden as a co-entry with future gelding Bill Clinton in 1992 White House Stakes Race. She won the Empire State Distaff in 2000 after Rudy Giuliani was a late scratch in the main event. Definitely an inside mover but a stumble in the Iraq Futurity may have cost her. br> Prediction: A show, at best. /p> p>Name: Christopher J. Dodd br> Foaling State: Connecticut br> Silks: Sandinista Red and Black with Olive Drab Castro Cap br> Trainer: Hartford Investment & Insurance Lobby Farms

topics:
Barack Obama, Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, Iraq, Oil